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Conception

When's the best time to get pregnant? Use our interactive ovulation calculator to work out when you're most fertile and most likely to conceive.

The WIMBEWAIF and WIMBEWAINF 2WW club, new and existing members welcome.

913 replies

Bucky2008 · 11/07/2008 20:51

Ahhh, look how nice and clean and new this thread is .

And there is a big ScaryHairy birthday cake for us all to share. I am not being good till after Thursday afterall...

OP posts:
GorgonsGin · 20/07/2008 14:16

hmmm about 5 minutes after opening the letter form the hospital yesterday, i opened the newspaper. Noot a good idea. "Why IVF fails - the hidden heartache of fertility treatment" (or something like that) was the headline in the Times

NOT what I wanted to read.

QueenyEisGotTheBall · 20/07/2008 15:02

hi ladies
GG wow at the quick appointment!! at this rate you will one of the fabulous preggo lurkers on this thread in no time!! loads of luck and icsi baby dust for you * caitni sorry about your meltdown!! i have these regularly so you are most definitely not alone in this!! my milestone was to be preg before my DD was 2 and a half and that was last month and i thought i had made it twice only to get disappointed soon after!! its only natural to want to plan things around having babies and i do it myself!! the important thing is to remember that it WILL happen and maybe sooner than you are expecting
hi to everyone else

Bucky2008 · 20/07/2008 18:40

Wow GG , that's amazing!! We are in July already!!! It's nearly your appointment! . I am going to Google ICSI to see what supportive cyber friend stuff I can do. I will be there on Tuesday, I plan on making my accupunture appointment next week too.

Caitni you WIMBEWAIF badge is in the cyber post . Its kind of like a Blue Peter badge but cooler and has a baby lion cub on it . Listen to everyone one else they are wise, we are all in that boat with you....and I will be the last person in the boat when you have all got off, so try to be positive (although it is easier said than done I know). I have been here since September 2006, how sad is THAT! . I am sure you will have a much shorter wait, how long have you been trying? Sorry if you have already told us this...

Ei the idea of you hiding behind a white van cracked me up....

Belated welcome to Citybranch. From the sounds of your name you could be a contender for our meet up on Tuesday. We are meeting for drinks in Exmouth Market if you are interested.

PnM sit down now, you may be overexcited by my next statement ....we had a kestral in our garden the other day . We have everything, or did until we got the dogs, most of our regulars have been scared away now . The dogs eat the bird seed too .

Big higs to everyone else. I am sulking today, I am still convinced that my tumour is the be all and end all. I have to wait for a hospital appointment. After months of campaigning for double yellow lines on the corner near my house they have painted them WRONG . My' belly button is disgusting where they have stabbed it. I tried to put pictures up on a newly plastered wall (it is dry it was done about a month ago) and made a big hole in the wall and the pictures are still not up. Oh and about a million other things I could moan about today. Finn keeps barking at our neighbour who is about 110 and tries to seduce DP everytime he goes next door to help her with 'man chores' she cannot do. We have just told him off and he is literally sitting in a corner staring at the wall sulking too....I think I will join him .

Laters. Hopefully I will snap out of it.

OP posts:
ScaryHairy · 20/07/2008 21:59

Hi ladies

Caitni I hope you're feeling a bit better. I know, ttc is shit. Today one of my friends perfectly innocently asked me whether we were going to have more children and I gave my stock answer of "not right now" and have been feeling rather pissed off ever since... Of course it's hard when things fail to happen to schedule (I was meant to have 2 children by now), but you have moved somewhere nice and are going to make a really nice home so that when your baby arrives you won't need to be running around kicking the builders out as you go into labour.

GG Wooo hoooo for the speedy appointment, that is great. I read the Times article too. The way I see it we all know that IVF is not a guarantee that you'll get a result, but you need to try because if you don't you'll regret it. Anyway I would have thought that you and Mr GG have a pretty good shot - it is only the dodgy swimmers that are the problem and you are otherwise absolutely pristine. I would probably tell work what I was up to (maybe just the person I report to directly) and I think there is a recent Tribunal case about a company being nasty to a women because she was undergoing IVF - I shall try to dig it out.

Am glad you had a good weekend Ei. We're cycle buddies this time, aren't we?

Bucky I'm sorry you're having a shit time and that your belly button is not looking its best. Just wait until you get pregnant and it pops out... then you'll have a disgusting belly button!

Higs to the rest of you.

citybranch · 20/07/2008 22:50

Bucky - would be interested in drinks on tues! Where can i find out/would you let me know the details?

QueenyEisGotTheBall · 21/07/2008 02:08

hi ladies
bucky sorry you are having a bit of a crap day today i hope tomorrow is a better, brighter day for you
scary i think we are cycle buddies im not sure im on cd 8/9 now so if you are then we are
hi to everyone else i hope you are all haveing a nice sleep after respective eventful weekends
xx ei xx

GorgonsGin · 21/07/2008 10:19

Morning everyone! It's a lovely day here . Sunshine outside my window sparkling off the river. Gorgeous. Puts me in a good mood (for once ). Also, i think I have an exercise endorphin high or somehting. I went swimming on Saturday and Sunday and thrashed out 75 and 55 lengths, and walked to work this morning (1 hr 15 mins) so I feel I'm on my way to winning the BBB Challenge. I used to swim loads and think nothing of long swims, but I am so unfit now

hello to citybranch and other Exmouth Needlers. Really glad you are coming to the meet up CB . Meet up tomorrow in Exmouth Market, N1 - would 6.30pm suit everyone as a good time? Does anyone have a good suggestion for a venue? I have my accupuncture appointment at 5.30pm, so I can hang around for a while or meet people for the early shift - whatever suits.

Soooooo, i think that means tomorrow's meet-er up-ers are Bucky, GorgonsGin, Scaryhairy, Caitni and citybranch . All welcome! If you are a regular lurker in the London area and fancy shanging out with the WIMBEWAIF 2WW Club, roll up! picknmix and MOB come up town for the evening and meet us all. Ei can you get to London from oooop narth?

Bucky - I'm sorry you are feeling down. LOL at you sulking with Finn. Ha, ha, my DH also has an aging neighbour who flirts with him outrageously and asks DH to do "odd jobs around the place. He's called Tim . When is your next appointment at the hospital and did you speak to the consultant about the fibroid and what can be done about it?

Scary - to be honest i didn't read the article on IVF. I probably would have, had the hospital letter not arrived out of the blue. I wasn't expecting anything for months and had got quite used to the idea of using the waiting time to lose weight, stop drinking and adopt a macro biotic diet so was feeling a bit shell shocked . I know that IVF success rates are not terrific, but more than anything else I have to keep a positive mental attitude to undergoing IVF, both to keep me sane and and give it the best shot, so thought "Nah, I'm not going to read anything negative".

MOB - did you have a nice weekend? Drop me an email if you want to chat about sperm and we're all here thinking of you. Big higs.

hello to everyone else. Big hello to mibbes jollybear and DG if they are lurking.

GorgonsGin · 21/07/2008 10:25

meant to say cheers for the babydust ei. maybe one day I will be a preggers lurker on the 2WW. I hope so

Caitni · 21/07/2008 12:13

Morning everyone,

GG WOW at the speed of your appointment - it's definitely good to get it sooner rather than later, though you must be nervous. I did some lurking on the assisted conception thread so I can get to grips with the lingo - I even know what downregging is now! - so you don't have to worry about us being clueless about what your posts mean . There'll be some complicated hormonal stuff going on, so you're right to be nervous but you're both doing your best to be in tip top shape, which definitely helps. Well done you with your swimming and walking to work!! I really don't think you can call yourself unfit with that many lengths . I think there's something lovely about being fit and active in the summer - it's a great way to enjoy the good weather while we have it. I saw this article in the Observer yesterday - it's about IVF and employment and it's pretty positive about changing attitudes/laws in relation to taking time off for treatment. My understanding of statistics is v poor, but I think the number of IVF cycles and the number of babies produced quoted in this article isn't so different from the regular BD-ing way (which is a 25% chance each time). It's access to the necessary number of cycles rather than IVF itself which seems to be the problem.

Citybranch what a coincidence about the house you were looking at!! Sounds like good karma to me . We're also renting at the moment - building up our deposit before buying. I wanted us to have bought by now (mainly because I thought I'd be en route to being heavy with child by now and wanting to nest ) but DH insists we wait until the housing market bottoms out and I'm now happy to wait. Guess that's an upside to TTC taking longer lol. In fact, the flat in Brighton we're renting was only on the market because the developer couldn't sell it!

Bucky thanks v v much for the badge - I'm (virtually) wearing it with pride! We've been trying since late December 2007, but since my cycles are on the short side I'm actually CD20 of my 9th cycle. We were a bit rubbish the first four cycles and reckon we weren't BDing enough at all but I've been temping and using a CBFM for 5 cycles now and am getting impatient! Sorry to hear your Sunday was a bit of a write-off. Does this mean you can't get a phone consultation before your hospital app? If so then I really hope you don't have to wait too long xx

Ei lol at your antics! Glad to hear you and your DH had such a laugh together - v important during stressful ttc times!

SH sorry to hear that your mood was thrown by your friend's question. I know people don't mean to be insensitive but I so wish people wouldn't even ask...

MOB hope you had a good weekend!

Thanks for all the kind words everyone - I really appreciate them! Am feeling way more positive and am actually kind of glad that Thurs night happened. It's cleared the air between me and DH (he had no idea how eaten up with this I was!) and I'm feeling genuinely relaxed after a lovely sunny weekend in Brighton (I feel like I've been on holidays lol). Having said that, AF due on Friday so entering the dangerzone of constant bathroom trips and inventing symptoms! FF's given me a test date of Sat so I'm not going to test before then (at least that's the plan now!).

So excited about meeing up tomorrow! 6.30 is fine for me. GG meant to say, my appointment finishes at 5.30 so I shall see you in the waiting room! Which will be handy for meeting up later .

Here are some possible places to go:
Dollar Grills and Martinis - quite glam, SATC vibe, but expensive for wine & beer bottles.

The Easton - a lovely gastro pub just off Exmouth Market - doesn't get too crowded early in the week and lovely comfy arm chairs and sofas.

Wilmington Arms - again, just off Exmouth Market. I've not been here since it was refurbed but friends say it's nice.

There's also Leon's in Ludgate Circus - not exactly Exmouth Market but not too far away and good for snacky food and drinks.

Anyway, enough of the mammoth post (which I started at about 11 but kept getting interrupted!).

QueenyEisGotTheBall · 21/07/2008 13:16

hi ladies
GG you are very welcome for the baby dust if i come across any more il pass it over
i wish i could come to your exmouth market adventure but being all the way up here does present a problem with travel etc last minute especially seeing as how i dont drive and public transport from here is notoriously crap!! maybe next time though as DH and i are looking for a little weekend away and i have never been to the south holidaying only ever for work and passing through silly question...where is exmouth market? is it london? or brighton? im not good on geography (you would never guess i got 94% on my geo SATs would you!!)
a big hi there and hello to everyone else
xx ei xx

Madoldbird · 21/07/2008 13:27

Hello everyone

GG Wow! at your appt!!! Really excited for you. That's so speedy, you must be in shock a bit. I shall be here to hold your hand through it all - as i'm sure we all will. If (fingers crossed) ICSI is an option for us, then i shall be really knowledgeable by the time we get there, having followed your journey!

Caitni Glad you are feeling a bit better. I think a good cry is essential once in a while on this ttc rollercoaster. Am so hoping that AF doesn't make an appearance with you this week!

PnM I have to confess that i am a bit of a twitcher, and am of you and your lovely location!!! Mind you, we did have a hobby peering into our (v small) pond a week or so ago, which i found exciting! So i can fully appreciate your DH's enthusiasm for getting a photo of the egret

Big hello to Bucky EI SH citybranch Mibbes JB and any (not deliberately) forgotten.

Didn't have a great weekend, TBH - still overwhelmed after last week. Feels strange not even being able to TTC (due to smear results) and i finally realised this morning that it is pretty pointless doing my temp any more. On the bright side my result was "borderline" which is the least sort of abnormal, so fingers crossed it goes back to normal next time. I found out from the PCT that we will not get any IVF etc funded, as they will not consider couples where one partner has had a child. So after DH's next results we will ask for a private referral. We are just hoping and praying that there are enough normal sperm for ICSI.

What i can't understand is that even with DH's very low reult, there must be a few thousand sperm able to swim up the appropriate fallopian tube. So why does it take so many????? The mysteries of conception, eh

Just want to check that you are all ok with me still hanging around here - despite the fact that we are now not even allowed to try any more (until Dec, hopefully) I promise to still make up symptoms if you'll let me stay

QueenyEisGotTheBall · 21/07/2008 13:34

hi MOB just a quick q. is it your smear results that have stopped you from actively TTC? or DHs results or a combination of factors? i would carry on as normal myself especially seeing as how ivf will have to be private (thats assuming that is how i would feel as i really dont know about that side of things yet) its just that i would want things to stay as normal as possible i think. and under NO circumstances are you to leave us!!!!! you are such a lovely person and we are better off with you here i think {{{{{{{{{hugs}}}}}}}}} i hope you get 'unexpectedly' knocked up between now and december and all this worry was for nothing
hi to everyone lurking while theyre working
xx ei xx

GorgonsGin · 21/07/2008 14:17

caitni - I'd vote for meeting in The Easton, 'cause I like gastro-pubs and big comfy sofas sound just my thing , but I'd be happy with any of them. I'll be there about 6.30pm ish then, although I'd give you the secret WIMBEWAIF Wink (it's a bit like this:) when I come out of my appointment so you know it's me grin]. Oooooh, it's just like an episode of Blind Date.

Ei* - Exmouth Market is in London, just north of the City and is a fairly bohemian, foodie area with great little shops and restaurants. Next time you've got to come to a meet We'll miss you. Sorry if we are all London centric. It used to drive me mad when I lived in Scotland that TV and radio is always obsessed with London, so I can appreciate the annoying-ness.

citybranch - are you coming too? Do come along

MOB - I hadn't realised that your abnormal smear meant that you couldn't TTC for six months. That's really for you on top of everything. What did your PCT say about the criteria for IVF selection. I am that if either partner has a child from a previous relationshi that rules you out of NHS funded IVF/ICSI. What a lottery it is! I feel very lucky living where we are. There is a lot of information on ICSI on the web and from what I have gleaned, I am sure your DH will have enough sperm for the procedure. Stick to British websites when you are surfing for information and if I have gone through it by December, I'll probably have more information. Please stay with us on this thread . We don't want you to go anywhere!

picknmix - any more exciting wild life round you?

Is anyone getting close to AF time or testing this month ? Big wave to everyone.

GorgonsGin · 21/07/2008 14:19

p.s. caitni - that article is great on IVF/employment. I think that employment law case about the waitress in Austria might have been the case that scary was referring to. Cheers ladies!

Madoldbird · 21/07/2008 14:43

EI yes, it is the smear test results that mean we can't ttc. I got around to reading the leaflet they sent, and it was in there. Infact it said to use "effective contraception", although i am sure we don't need to bother with that, judging by the past year / SA results. LOVE the idea of getting unexectedly knocked up though Thanks also GG. I will stay here then, even though not TTC for a few months. I will go away and do some reading on ICSI - not only so i learn more about it for when we get to see a consultant, but also so i will have an idea of what you will be going through (and hopefully be a more effective hand holder)

ScaryHairy · 21/07/2008 16:01

Hi Ladies

GG - yes, the article Caitni has linked to refers to the case I was thinking of (ECJ not Tribunal, but still applies). I guess the point is that IVF might make you feel a bit crap from time to time so telling your boss (if you get on with him/her) is probably a good move. I am becoming convinced that staying positive is an important part of ttc and agree that it's a good idea to steer clear of negative thoughts. I am very impressed with the swimming etc ( - that's me gasping for air at the prospect of any exercise) - you'll be very well prepared for the IVF at this rate. I'm sure being fit can only help.

Re the meet-up, you guys decide where to go and I will do as I am told! I can be there before 6:30 (probably from about 5:30 in fact) if anyone fancies an earlier exit from work.

I'm looking forward to meeting you Caitni. MOB you have had a lot of crappy news lately. I am sending you a lot of (((higs))) to help you through it. And if there's anything I can do to cheer you up please let me know. The break from ttc is not nice, I know, but you might find it takes the pressure off a bit (it certainly did when DH and I had to hold fire for 3 months). In the meantime you are not allowed to leave us... or else.

Picknmix and Bucky I'm really of your countryside adventures too. Around my way the animal I see most often is the rat!!

Ei I am on CD7, so we're as close to being buddies as we're going to get on this thread!

Waves to everyone else. I hope you're all doing well.

Bucky2008 · 21/07/2008 16:43

Hey Exmouth Market Needlers , I can leave work at 5.30pm so can be at Exmouth Market at say, 5.34pm . Is the Easton the venue then?

I am ringing up Mr Needles now, my plan for health domination begins on CD1 so I can have drinks tomorrow woohoo. I was going to start being good after my Lap and Dye but figured it will be easier to be virtuous at the start of a cycle. CD25 today so AF should be around at the end of the week. I will try and make my appointment for Thursday.

OP posts:
ScaryHairy · 21/07/2008 16:44

Yay! see you at 5:34 Bucky.

The Easton is fine by me.

Mr Needles is going to get a shock if he pops into the pub and sees all of his favourite customers in there together...

Caitni · 21/07/2008 17:13

The Easton is lovely so yay for that! I'm not sure if I'll go straight there from my needles (so the forehead splot is nice and bright) or be good and go back to the office...that translates as I'll probably be in there at 5.34pm as well!

MOB I'm at your PCT funding rules - that seems so unfair and it just doesn't reflect the reality of many couples, with children from former relationships. And very glad that you're staying here - being supported through forced non-ttcing is just as important as being supported through ttcing IMO.

MOB, your comment about sperm suddenly reminded me of this amazing video we watched in Biology class when I was a spotty teen -it filmed the sperm from ejaculation right through to fertilisation, with a soothing hippy american voiceover. My memory of the sperm in the cervix, womb and fallopian tube was that they kept trying to fertilise any round cell they saw (with the voiceover droning things like "yet more spermatoza attempting to fertilise cells from the wall of the womb"). All I thought at the time was of randy dogs humping table legs...could this be the reason so many are released when it only takes one?

Bucky2008 · 21/07/2008 22:37

MOB I forgot to say that you are not allowed to leave!!! We will miss you loads and you are a WIMBEWAI(N)F member. Your badge is also in the post and you must wear it for the immediate future or else .

OP posts:
GorgonsGin · 22/07/2008 10:53

hello everyone! My appointment is 5.30pm tonight with the Exmouth Needler (like the Boston Strangler or the Yorkshire Ripper but without the murder and depravity ) so I'll be along to the meet up about 6.20-ish. Will probably see you coming out when I go in, Caitni.

Really looking forward to meeting everyone (MOB and Ei you will be missed! are you sure we can't tempt you along ) I'll recognise Bucky and Scary I think. You can show us your war wounds, Bucky, after we've had a few . Ha, by the time I show up, you'll be into your second G&T's .

Just realised I sort of imposed the Easton on you ladies by saying I'll be there at 6.30pm. Hope no-one minds!

Nothing to report here - CD6, so I think a wee drink is in order tonight. I went swimming again last night, so I have a stone to lose for Bali and six weeks to do it in ! Plus, getting as fit and healthy as possible for ICSI. I've called my new fitness campaign "Swim for Swimmers", good eh?

DH is away in the States for a week with work and then in Germany again, but he's here until CD17 (wooo hoo!), so it has worked out really well this month with TTC. I can't believe our IVF hospital appointment is next week . I am trying to make a list of all the things I have to ask. It has come around so quickly that I haven't had a chance to open the IVF book I bought off Amazon. I had planned to read it cover to cover so I would be uber knowledgable. Don't think I'll have time now.....it's not the sort of book i want to read on the tube on the way to work with pictures of sperm and bright pink lettering screaming "In Vetro Fertilisation"! )

scary - I am really reassured by that ECJ case. I think I'll explain to HR and have it down on my record and hopefully they will be symapthetic. I really don't want to tell anyone i work with though. I don't want the intrusion of people's concern and good wishes if they don't understand, even when people are being lovely, if that makes sense?? . Hell, I'm still debating whether to tell my family we're undergoing ICSI for the same reason, but that's another story

GorgonsGin · 22/07/2008 11:06

Absolutely PMSL at the thought of Mr Needles popping in for a swift half at his local and seeing us all sitting there. He must think something is up....he's got four new patients in the last month all TTC with different issues. We'll know if he's telling the truth with his "success rates". We can double check them on the WIMBEWAIF 2WW thread

Madoldbird · 22/07/2008 11:54

Would love to come along GG but unfortunately i have a meeting this afternoon that i think will be a very long one. I will be thinking of you all - have a wonderful time. Get planning the Brighton day trip - I'm looking forward to that!!!

Have a good day everyone.

Caitni · 22/07/2008 14:48

Oh ladies, I did a stupid thing last night...I raided my stock of First Response tests for a hpt (damn you boots and your 2 for 1 offer!). The whole time I was staring at it, I knew it was a stupid thing to do. I thought I saw the faintest of faint lines, but then realised I was kidding myself. It was definitely a BFN. I mean, what was I expecting testing at 9dpo? It's hard to explain, but it was like I entered into a tunnel, or was acting like a zombie or something - there was nothing that would have stopped me (granted, I was home alone and haven't told my DH yet - he thinks hpts cost so much that he doesn't understand why women just wait until their period is late, which is just about a typical man's response!). Am so very .

MOB sorry I wont't get to meet you tonight, but roll on the day at the seaside. I hope your afternoon meeting doesn't drag on too much. I spent most of the morning in a meeting that just went on and on and on...I could see the sunshine outside and just couldn't concentrate!

Hi to Ei and PnM and everyone else! Best get down to some work before my app with Mr Needles at 4.45
C
xx

GorgonsGin · 22/07/2008 15:10

caitni - don't worry about doign the early test. Higs that it was negative . hey, we've all done the same. Those pesky HPT's are the bane of every 2ww-er's life. Having HPTs in the bathroom cabinet when you're on the 2WW is like having a huge tin of chocolate biscuits in the cupboard when you are on a diet . Too tempting!

Men never understand our impatience with our own bodies. I don't think my Dh knows how much they cost (or how many I have done over the years )