Very nervous to TTC after a miscarriage but am going for it

[Bella23]

For those who want to look to the future and TTC again I would really like some support, advice etc.
I thought we needed a new thread with positive energy (yes have turned into chanting hippy) so that we feel we are moving forward rather than dwelling on what has already passed.
The only thing I can concentrate on at the moment is that next Wed is the day that me and DH can start trying again (this will be 2 weeks after ERPC).
Anyone else ready to try again?

Bella, well done for staying away from the Aug thread.

I'm so sorry for the pain you are going through with your BF. I have a similar situation with mine (she called me on sat with news on her scan). I'm trying to be honest with mine in order to get through this and it is very hard. She is also feeling really disappointed in what has happened and also feels abandoned & alone at the moment. We were both so excited to be going through everything together and I think she is genuinely scared to have to face this without me going through it at the same time.

I really would say, as hard as it is, try to see her. I went to see mine last week and was terrified but I'm so glad I went. Despite circumstances you probably both need each other more than ever at the moment.
xxx

just love coming and reading all your posts! (i dont get out much..........LOL)
george - surely that colgate cant cause ferning? just smeary bits??? its making me giggle anyhow. maybe you should contact the test makers and say excuse me does colgate often give false results>?????
love the link bella, ta much! will get one for him now. met your br and bite the bullet once and for all. even if its a crap quick painful meeting, you will have done the first hurdle.
ah yes george i have a cleaner who irons!!!! that wold be why i have time to paint and bake and scrapbook etc etc......TBH i cant cope with the housework my brood conjur up, i simply cant keep up. so after many a breakdown over it, dh got a cleaner organised, she calls twice a week, - not often enough! but just keeps it together enough for me to keep up you know? its like the waltons here already. cant wait to add to the chaos!!! my cleaner absolutely despairs with me, apparently no family has ever made this much ironing ever!! and i'm the ony person in the world who tidies BEFORE the cleaner arrives so shes not horrified!!!!
happy birthday for the morning Mr mishi!!!
have you tested YET rom???

morning all
Dh is having a lie in so have snuck on

Romilly r u one day over now? when are you going to test was thinking about you last night

DQ i want a cleaner who irons...although think we already have one ..me..i absolutely hate ironing so try to limit it to once a week...good excuse for having tons of clothes..lol

Bella good luck with the ov testing hopefully 10am should give u a pos

George good to see you back..i did see u had moved back to the other thread hope you are ok

yingers/hereshoping hope you are both ok
skips full of baby dust for everyone

Morning all !
DQ - agree on the ironing front, we have a cleaner once a week and she does all the ironing and cleaning. We got one after DH admitted in a "discusion" that his time was too precious to waste on cleaning and ironing....mmmm....this was after I had spent the time doing it myself!!!!!!!!! So the next week I organised a cleaner, it was either that or leave him for being a sexist pig! I also spend the night before tidying before she comes!
Right have come armed with ov tests so will be testing at 10am every day.
Romilly - Let us know an update please?
George, great idea to keep up with the DIY, its a great distaction! Thanks also for the advice about BF, I shall arrange to see her next week and bite the bullet.

BFN

ARH Rom - sorry !
Could be early though? Cycles could be a bit longer this time round? Not over until the fat lady sings and AF arrives.
How are do you feel?

thank you bella and thank you for thinking of me everyone

couldnt hold out any longer, on the testing

one solitary pink line on first response - and boohoo - took me straight back to where i'd been post erpc. just broke down am afraid. STUPIDLY i got all excited as no signs whatsoever of AF - and to be frank waiting to CD28 (13DPO) made me pathetically hopeful, because my pre mc cycle was NEVER over 26 days (and mostly a lot shorter.)

i have learnt one thing from the experience - don't test right before going to work if you don't want to end up with your make-up running down your face . not a good look! there was one big consolation for me - d/h was just lovely, big hugs and i honestly think he's sad too

MAYBE, bella there is still hope because absolutely zero signs of AF but i dont want to build up my hopes again at the moment, the disappointment is too immense.

Oh Rom - its so hard isn't it!!
I think you did the right thing, have a good cry to get it out of your system. There is still hope but to be honest I would really try to prepare yourself for AF. That way it would be great if you got a BFP next week but mentally you will be prepared for if she shows up.

Am so glad you DH was with you, it really helps when you think they feel exactly the same way you do, it makes you feel like you are more in it together.

aww romilly huge hugs hun i was so sure u would be..dont know y..lol
Maybe as bella said it might be too early i know with pip i tested on 10th nov and got bfn but on the 14th got bfp and i even had a small sign of af?
Huge gigantc hugs hun

thks bella - thank god for you guys - really does help

btw bella - i was thinking about your OV test time question last night (as you do!) and i checked the info on my clearblue digital OPK instructions - which said, quite categorically, you can test at ANY time as long as you have left 4 hours before urinating - so i'd imagine that for most of us that would have to most convenient first thing a.m.! right?? so DQ i am really confused about this now - where did you get your info and does it vary according it DIGITAL and non-digital OPKs or what? (yes, mishi that would be the smiley face ones!!)

also persona works on the principal of first pee of the day.

thks mishi

Romilly I'm so sorry for you and Mr R.
I'm keeping my fingers crossed for the retest.
It is so hard going through this. Prior to m/c I would never have imagined just how much it affects you moving forwards.
Sending you {{{{hugs}}} and lots of positive vibes across. xxx

Romilly that's really interesting.
I read on the fertility friend website that the LH levels aren't up by first pee so it advises not to do it then. I have to say though as an avid water drinker I don't think there is ever a 4 hour period during the day when I don't pee!!
When I tested at 10am I got nothing showing whereas when I had tested yesterday at first pee I got a faint line.
mmmm...not sure what to think now!
DQ - I think we need your opinion ??

morning ladies, so so sorry Rom on that bfn.
hang in there, maybe its just a day or so awy from a bfp??? hugs to you from 'sunny' southampton.
wel my opks (and i have two types, cause i'm sad like that!) says NOT first morning pee cause it can give false results (ie false positives)...and so does fertility friend/conceptionstore...etc ..etc. all i can think is as technology moves on (and those digi ones must be right up there!) they've made it so you can use first morning urine. hm, dont know, i should imagine you need to go by your opk actual box, as its got to differ then. [confused face here] what brand are yours bella? i know the 'cheap' () stick type i have are very pathetic and say after 10 and before 8. maybe i should splash out and buy the other ones if cant manage 10am??!
tell me what your brands say purlease ladies....

Unfortunately I bought some off the internet and have lost the paper instructions - mine are on-call. Ring any bells?
I think I may carry on for this month but will try and test at 12 as i tend to pee a lot in the morning due to fruit smoothie first thing and then hot water and lemon. (God knows why I am telling you that info - sorry !!) Then next month I shall splash out on some ones from Boots to see if they make any difference.

thankyou george and dqueen - you are all being so supportive.

hey sorry - i seem to have caused great confusion on the OPK question! maybe worth a global mumsnet thread to see what the general consensus is! my feeling is that dqueen is prob. right - in that not all OPKs are equal ie. some (digital) can cope with morning pee!

Here is what it says on fertility friend:

"The presence of increased amounts of LH in your urine, as detected by OPKs, usually means that you will ovulate within 12-24 hours but this can vary slightly depending on your own hormonal profile. LH is not released all at once, but rather it rises and falls for about 24-48 hours. The LH rise usually begins in the early morning while you are sleeping and it takes 4-6 hours for it to appear in your urine after that. For this reason, first morning urine may not give the best result. Testing mid-day is usually recommended. It is important to follow the instructions of your OPK for maximum results."

nope, dont have that brand, however i would think MOST brands are after 10am kinda thing. so stick with that for those.
romilly -of course we're being supportive!!! i personally am here for each and everyone of you, right up until you get a BFP or tell me to bugger off!! i simply wouldnt have got thro the m/c and aftershocks with out the people here, on this thread and on mumsnet in general. somedays i only got out of bed because of the 'sat here waiting....' thread.
i hope our babies will all grow up 'penpals' with each other from this.
and if its any crappy consulation - i got TWO months of bfn before i got bfp with Miss mollie (dd2) each time i totally fell apart and was horrible to be within ten feet of. so youre doing very well this tiem I will be gutted any time i get a bfn, but because i've done it once before after a m/c & ERPC, i kinda have faith i will get pg again, successfully. if that makes sense.

Romilly, have just started a thread 'to the masses' re opks, so bella maybe one of them will have your brand??

thats interesting bella. i guess later testing is best then - but how does anyone hold on for 4 hours??!! not sure my bladder is up to that, lol..

how are those cookies coming on today dq? you are very quiet so must be busy in the kitchen

d/h just called to check up on me - he told me maybe i should give mumsnet a wide berth today !!!! (he's only trying to keep me sane) but what would i do without my MN buddies ?!

Arh DQ - you are such a sweetie
Rom - am glad you are finding us all some support. It really does help to let off steam on here so that to the rest of the world you can appear "normal" and "non obsessed". If not for MN I fear I would be stopping complete strangers on the street to ask their opinion of when to use ov tests!!

dqueen - sorry as you can tell i had this message half typed on my screen while trying to get some work done, LOL - so hadnt seen your posts. well done for the thread - will watch with interest! and i know you are right about the bfn, stay positive

Oh dear, doesn't look like anyone is holding out much hope for OPKS!!
Is anyone using Persona at all? Keep looking at them and then have to remind myself that my cycle is too long for it to work .
Back to my saliva checking........did spot some more ferning though! Not toothpaste this time, it is real life ferning!!! Long way to go before it means anything I think, as there isn't a lot, but it's given me hope that the thing might work.

Now I'm sure you are all going to be mightily impressed with this (Romilly in particular!) ............I've currently got a tray of flapjack cooking in the oven!!!!! Yes, I have baked something!
I'll let you know if it is edible later. xx

MIGHTILY impressed georgy!!

i use persona btw, probably not a good advert for them just yet!

George - am very impressed!
I would like to get persona but would how many months info does it need before it will start telling you when you ov - Rom ?