calling old duffers or old up the duffers

[marinda]

By popular request (2 votes actually!) this is a thread for old duffers like me who are over the hill and TTC and for anyone who is old and up the duff ! I didn't suggest these terms so please don't get offended if you don't see yourself as a duffer but would like moral support , chat etc...
I am 38 years younh, have ds - 3.8 and have been TTC for 7 months ---aaaarggg!!!

Just realised that I repeated the anecdote about my mum twice in a very short series of posts. Must be really getting to me!

hest - just quickly from the www. thread, I got a v v faint BFP this morning!!! YAY!!!! will email u tomorrow from work!

Oh Munz....I'm soo pleased for you, after all the support you've given all of us, and all you've been through

Hope all goes well and your little bean sticks!

Much love, BL xx

Congrats Munz.

Hester - I'm planning to stop work at 30 weeks this time and really take it easy. Like you - don't feel I've got the energy to push it to the limit this time.

Congratulations Hester

Munz...Congratulations!!! I'm sure we were on a TTC thread together. Will follow this thread to read up on your news..do keep in touch

14wks+

thanks girls,

(cha cha i'm on the anti natal thread now don't like to post on here cos i'm not really an old duffer!)

I've emailed you, Munz, but I'll say it again - fantastically brilliant! I'm so proud of you!

Hi there Y'All!

I too am an old timer 37 and ttc number 5.

I had three children easily ( first too easily!)in my mid twenties and then after a gap stopped ovulating and had to have ovulation induction with number 4.
I got pg after 4 months of injections but was getting desperate ( they only allow 6 months) when after seeing the consultant one day i cornered my fertility nurse and said 'Is there anything else I could be doing' She said simply to me ' you are taking baby aspirin' Of course i was not. I then took as she recommended every day for a month and was pg the next month - just chance perhaps.......... Later when I saw the consultant I said should I stop taking it ( fear of reyes disease and just reading gubbins on packet - plus I have 3 childrren and none of them are allowed it) he said continue till 16 weeks. This I did. Later i saw a different consultant and said to him ' Shall I stop now' he said ' the choice is yours but you can continue with it up to 34 weeks' Supposedly it helps to prevent miscarriage as it encourages blood flow through the umbilical. It worked for me and my boy is a gift! Surprisingly though I have never seen it recommended. The tablets are tiny 40 mg rings-a-bell but I am unsure and they are generally used in heart disease patients as a one a day blood thinning agent. Got them from Boots...just asked for baby aspirin ..tiny dose and no one batted an eyelid.
I believe that was what did it for me and if you are having probs its worth a go!

Miranda, that's really interesting. Have just popped in to see how everyone is, well done to everyone with BFP's, great news!

Well, no BFP's for me, sadly. We have decided to give it just 4 more cycles, and then stop. I'm finding it all too stressful and I get so excited around testing time then come crashing down when af arrives. I shall be 38 in 3 weeks and we had always said 39 would be our cut off date for having a second. We are really going to give it a go the next few months, but I have to say I don't feel very positive about it and have almost given up. Sorry to paint such a negative picture, but it really gets to you sometimes.

Hi

Just though Id pop in here as had topic especially for us old duffers - ie testing etc when pg.

Have just had my nuchal scan last week. Was pretty good result but I was just a bit surprised by a few things (and had gone through it before so thought I was pretty clued up)There was such a big difference between when I was 38 and pg and now when 40 and pg. When they measured each baby they had about the same neck measurement. But this baby is a 1 in 278 trisomy risk whereas I cant remember totally last time as it was so low but about 1 in 700. SO the difference is just due to 2 years in age -that has amazed me.

Also didnt know there are different calculations for nuchals. I got a pure neck measurement but we got a consultatnt who had trained at another hospital and talked to us about the nasal bone structure as well. Apparenty in soem hospitals the nasal bone is taken into account on the overall risk calculaton, Our baby ahs a very good clear nasal structure which another indication that is a lower trisomy risk than the figure weve been given so we were pleased that he could tell us that.

Also was given hospital info on amnio just in case we changed our mind on not having invasive tests. Was surprised on things that can go wrong - ie didnt knwo sometimes they get mothers cells instead of babys and test fails due to that. Also in our hospital amnio is half the risk of CVS - wasnt aware of that before - they strongly said to have amnio if wanted further test.

Lots of surprises in whole process.

It has made me think I dont want to try for another child in future -always thought I would like 3 but I think the risks would probably be too high - what do others think?

We're not doing more testing - just enjoying 6 months we have left before life changes again.

Hoep all the rest of you are well and that things are going as you would wish!

MF

Very interested to hear your experience, mumfun. I am 41 and 6 wks and wondering what to do about tests.I was thinking of nuchal and then cvs if necessary because it could be done earlier. Would rather avoid any invasive tests of course but trying to work out the options.

I am 38 next week so guess I am an old duffer??!

I did not have any tests with both pregnancies (dd 20mths and still born daughter philippa 25 weeks 05.04.05).

I declined the blood tests where you get a score as I was over 35 with dd and 37 with Philippa and knew score would be high. I would never have amnio as no point, I could not terminate, personal choice.

Not to say I did not worry like mad until 20 week scan when they say all ok.Saying that I was scanned with Philippa at 21 weeks, all ok and 4 weeks later she died suddenly in the womb for no reason.Sorry if this upsets readers

Hi

Chocolatepeanut - Im very sorry for your loss - it must have been such a shock - I personally dont mind at all that you post - I think you are right too - it is very sadly what you expereinced and we should all talk about such things and remember our lost children.

In this pregnancy I am much more aware that things could go wrong. My attitude is to be more grateful for the things that have gone right for me otherwise - because of my age the risks (mostly MC first 13 weeks I think) were much higher for carrying this child. I feel more lucky to have my healthy little toddler that I have. Im not trying to tell anyone how they shoudl feel - just me.

The reason I had the nuchal test was because last time it reduced our risks so much and made me happier through the pregnancy. If it had not come out well I feel I would have been better prepared and had time to read up etc. I did not intend to have any invasive tests as I could not liev with myself if anything had gone wrong. (But I did allow myself the option of change because I think you can never know what you will do)

ANyway thats my opinion - there is nothing so different as peoples views on all aspects of pg, childbirth and raising kids (espeially testing I think)

ANyway hope all old duffers well

MF