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Conception

When's the best time to get pregnant? Use our interactive ovulation calculator to work out when you're most fertile and most likely to conceive.

Original poster

calling old duffers or old up the duffers

363 replies

marinda · 15/01/2005 21:05

By popular request (2 votes actually!) this is a thread for old duffers like me who are over the hill and TTC and for anyone who is old and up the duff ! I didn't suggest these terms so please don't get offended if you don't see yourself as a duffer but would like moral support , chat etc...
I am 38 years younh, have ds - 3.8 and have been TTC for 7 months ---aaaarggg!!!

OP posts:
madness · 31/03/2005 16:02

yes, could do with some support... Sitting on my own with dd and ds. This morning felt awful, dizzy, cramps , felt sick but managed to bribe them to watch a movie and have some chocolate (normally not allowed to eat in the tv room...), so was able to lay down for a bit.
Sometimes feel a bit weepy but ds would get too upset.

romilly · 31/03/2005 17:11

madness - poor you, i really do feel for you. it is the most upsetting time and it really helped me being able to talk to people on MN when i couldnt face anyone in RL. the thread which i attached in my second post is a trying to conceive thread which i know seems inappropriate for you right now, but there are several people who post who are not at that stage yet, post m/c.

Arabica · 31/03/2005 20:01

Hi Madness, so sorry to hear about your m/c, because I know how hideous it feels. I am 43 and was also happily pregnant, then had missed m/c and ERPC just about 6 weeks ago. Not ready to ttc, still grieving for lost pregnancy BUT can honestly say that I am feeling much better (ie not needing to constantly weep buckets all the time)than I was 6 weeks ago.

romilly · 01/04/2005 13:22

madness - how are you today hon? hope you are looking after yourself. the thread i told you about has just started a new one. hope you come and join us when you are ready. (link on old thread)

madness · 01/04/2005 14:28

thanks for asking. no one in RL knew I was pregnant so stuck on my own, although ds and dd keep me busy...
Feel I shouldn't complain too much as I have a ds and dd and never had problems concieving like some of you, but still....

Cam · 01/04/2005 14:42

Congratulations Bayleaf
Commiserations madness and Arabica

romilly · 01/04/2005 15:19

madness - "but still" is right - you have every right to feel let down. you have just been through a devastating time plus your hormones are probably all over the place still and as arabica says you cant help weeping - but it honestly does get better in time. in the meantime, give yourself loads of treats - wine, chocolate, dvds, long baths - say no to everything you dont want to do. take care

TeaTime · 02/04/2005 16:58

Madness,
Please know that we feel so much for you - I had an m/c (at 45) in Feb and really found MN a lifesaver. Pour your heart out here - we understand!!

Mumfun · 05/04/2005 20:55

Hi Madness (and any others in this situation) I am so sorry

Your hormones must be horrible. DO take care of yourself and take some support and care from folk

Hoping it gets easier

MF

madness · 05/04/2005 21:03

it's been "good" to know others are going through the same, whether it's a mc or sleepless nights, tantrums of a two year old etc. Especially now as I hadn't told anyone yet about being pregnant. So thanks everyone.

romilly · 06/04/2005 14:32

hope you are feeling a little better each day madness - it takes time. you may want to wait a while but this is the follow-on thread to the last one i sent you...everyone on this thread knows the agony of m/c's but is cautiously ttc'ing!!

here

marinda - how are you doing???? you must be coming up to your first scan now? hope the sickness has eased off. sticky babydust to you

Original poster
marinda · 06/04/2005 19:21

Hi Romilly - yes sickness easing a bit - has first scan and everything is OK. I am 15 weeks now so out of danger zone to some extent. How are you keeping ? Any news ?

OP posts:
romilly · 07/04/2005 14:19

marinda that is great news glad to hear sickness easing off. god, doesnt time fly - i didnt realize its been over 15 weeks . no news for me yet but watch this space

any other old duffers got up the duff lately?!

goldenoldie · 09/04/2005 08:04

Hi Girls, Can I join you? I'm 41 and expecting no2 in December. No 1 already 9 years old - time flies! I'm based in London - any other Londoners out there?

Original poster
marinda · 09/04/2005 19:37

Hi goldenoldie and welcome- I am also pg -due september 30th so 15 weeks now. Not london based but midlands. Finding being pg at 39 plus a 4 year old very tiring indeed !!!!! Have you any plans for a nucal scan ? I had one and found it very reassuring as odds of DS is 1 in 270 - same as woman in 20's - so at aleast from that point of view I am ok ! Still feeling sick though !!!!

OP posts:
goldenoldie · 09/04/2005 20:36

Hi Marinda, will have my 6 week scan next week, just to make sure everything is OK. I think the nucal is much later - around 12 weeks. I think they do the nucal routinely? - don't think you have to ask for it, or do you?

LunarSea · 12/04/2005 13:07

Hi Bayleaf - good to see you back. And great news!

Original poster
marinda · 13/04/2005 20:34

Golenoldie - paid privately for nuchal scan as it is done doen routinely in my area - although I think in some London areas it is. Amnio and CVS are invasive testing and carry risk of miscarriage. Hope this helps.

OP posts:
network · 15/04/2005 13:48

Hi all
When is it too late to conceive? Is there a general concensous on this thread?

My cousin's 2nd marriage and had a child at 47(USA)
I wonder if they are more accepting in the States
?????

network · 15/04/2005 13:54

Contraversal Question
Would any of you consider using a surrogate's womb for IVF despite being able to get pg

Arabica · 15/04/2005 20:06

Network, why do you ask?? Is it something you're considering yourself?

network · 18/04/2005 14:09

I love my daughter but i hated being pg. for all the known reasons. I would prob not do it (£) but would it be better for baby if womb is younger? just thoughts

Mumfun · 21/04/2005 09:07

Hi Network and all

I would not consider a surrogate in those circumstances -however I did not hate being pg. It has crossed my mind however to ask my sister to give me an egg - she is much younger and we would be much more likely to have baby therefore.

Dont knwo if I would actually do it, though

Hugs to all

MF

Mumfun · 21/04/2005 09:07

Hi Network and all

I would not consider a surrogate in those circumstances -however I did not hate being pg. It has crossed my mind however to ask my sister to give me an egg - she is much younger and we would be much more likely to have baby therefore.

Dont knwo if I would actually do it, though

Hugs to all

MF

caz61 · 22/04/2005 00:05

Hi All old duffers

Just joining this thread and have to say some of you "old duffers" are soooooo young - to me anyhow!! I am 43 (aaagh) and have my first chat thru with fertility doc next week! Have been trying but not very seriously and now know am not ovulating.....hoping someone can still wave their magic wand (apart from DP's obvious one!!)

Find myself scanning the posts for peoples ages -willing everyone to be older than me

Bayleaf...used to see you on the threads a while back - lovely to see a familiar name and many congrats