Friendly/supportive/sensitive thread 🌱

[Ladyinpink1]

Hi everyone, I was hoping to start a nice friendly supportive and sensitive thread. Maybe for those ttc for a while or after losses or just finding things difficult with ttc in general. I love to read others have had bfp's as it gives me hope, but have been finding some threads with alot of positive test pictures posted quite difficult.
Hoping to find others looking for the same as it's lovely to have a place to rant, feel sad, feel happy, get advice, or just obsess without judgement 🙂

I am 36, started ttc 2 years ago, had 2 mmc, and have now been ttc for 14 months since the last one without success. Currently on cd14 on a "not tracking"cycle. x

Hi, it definitely is very tough. I try to stay positive but sometimes that's hard also when everyone around you has fallen pregnant and have had their babies...

I'm tempted to change my vitamins, do you just take the folic acid?

Hi all, hope you don’t mind me joining. @Ladyinpink1 directed me here ☺️ I haven’t been on threads for a while as I took a step back as I’d been struggling, but feel like I could do with some support from others going through this too.

I am TTC my first, and have had 2 MMC in the past year. My last one was 7 months ago, and I’ve been TTC for the last 3/4 months. I am on CD40 something & haven’t ovulated. Waiting on some blood test results from the recurrent miscarriage clinic I am under to see if any hormone reason can be found for the irregular cycles.

Don’t know if any of you feel similar, but I am finding the festive season hard. I should be spending Christmas with a new baby, but instead I’m grieving 2 losses. Don’t feel like putting my Xmas tree up & just feel very disinterested in it all

@Jemmy94 it's so frustrating. Still nothing this morning?

@Ladyinpink1 oh so sorry 😔 lots of Christmas baby dust for next cycle! I haven't tested. Due today, if she doesn't arrive tomorrow, I think I'll test on Friday. I thought AF was coming and then nothing happened, all symptoms gone, so 🤷‍♀️

@Figtree11 I think I have seen you on some other threads (I am a long time lurker on Mumsnet) sorry to hear about your losses. Completely understand how you're feeling, I've had a couple. I should be 9 months pregnant right now. TTC is hard and the constant disappointment zaps the joy out of everything.

Have you found your cycles changed after your losses?

It is, AF turned up at 4:30am this morning horrific cramps that haven't been this bad since I was a teen. This whole cycle has been a bit of an odd one.

Fingers crossed for you!

@Figtree11 Hi, im so sorry to hear of your losses. I can't imagine how hard it must be especially this time of year.

I'm feeling like it's unlikely this month, it's such a long couple weeks. Going to try have a break from it all over Christmas. (Realistically I know when I ovulate so will still try DTD but the test strips and symptom spotting will just tell myself to have a break.)

@Figtree11 It is a hard time of year, and although it's always difficult to want a babe and not have one, I do think Christmas is especially hard when wanting your first as there's nothing to distract you. I do think you deserve Christmas cheer and to enjoy things just for yourself though, if you can bring yourself to do the tree and treat yourself it might bring a little joy. (If not that's understandable).

Thank you @Vanilla90 i’m sorry you’ve had losses too. It’s so hard thinking what should be. I should have either 6 month or 1 month old by Christmas if either had worked out. I’m now consumed by worry about why I’m not getting pregnant again.
I don’t really know my cycle - I was on the pill since a late teen, and came off last year to TTC. I got pregnant after 3 months. Then after the first loss I got pregnant again. In that time my cycle lengths varied, but would be around 6 weeks long. And still they are all over the place with each cycle differing. How long have you been TTC for recently?

Thank you @Jemmy94 How are you doing?

Thank you @LuluGilmore I guess in my head I had an idea of what Christmas should be like this year, and how magical it should be. Last Christmas was a month after my first loss & kept telling myself how different this Xmas should be, but it’s just exactly the same. I will probably put the tree up in a couple of weeks, and we have made plans for weekends away before Xmas which should help distract. How are you?

@Figtree11 I'm okay, bit deflated today as AF showed up this morning, but also looking forwards to trying for the next cycle as its a new opportunity. It can be hard to be positive

@Jemmy94 hope you're feeling better and your cramps have eased off.

@Ladyinpink1 sorry about your BFN. I tested this morning, BFN too... and now AF is starting. Feeling like an idiot 🙃

@Figtree11i remember my midwife saying to me, even though losses are hard, a positive is that you're able to get pregnant and mc are much more common that we think. I guess in some weird way, that's true. I do tell myself, it'll happen again, someday. I've been trying since Jan 2023. Last Christmas I said to myself, I'll enjoy this one as much as I can, drink lots of wine, eat lots of food, because next Christmas I'll probably be pregnant... it is heartbreaking to know a year on, nothing has changed.
I've noticed my cycles have been longer since my mc 🤷‍♀️

@Vanilla90 Feeling better today cramps aren't as intense but this doesn't seem to be my normal AF.

Has anyone else experienced sudden changes to their AF with no explanation?

@Jemmy94 i'm sorry your period has arrived and you are feeling bad cramps with it.
Well I did take a mutiltude of supplements, I definitely was rattling, but recently I have cut them right down to coq10 (ubiquinol), vit d, Folic acid, b6 and then some other general vitamins. x

@Figtree11 hi! So nice to see your name on the thread 🙂 I'm sorry no ovulation yet, I can only imagine the frustration from that.
The thoughts of "what should be" are the worst aren't they. Sending a hug xx

@Vanilla90 oh no, I'm sorry your period arrived. Hope you are doing ok x

I’ve totally given up with the LH tests again, Ewcm has completely gone 🙃 I think I’m just going to keep taking my vitamins and hope I ovulate at some point! I think my partner is enjoying not knowing when I will ovulate as an excuse to try more often 🤣

My period just started this evening now too! So onto what feels like at least cycle number 10,064 now.

It's good to be going onto a new cycle but also rubbish to have to start it all again Isn't itx

@Ladyinpink1 sorry to hear your periods turned up 🥲 I hope one of us is lucky on this thread and gets a bfp before the new year, it definitely won’t be me though 🙃

@BGxxx sorry I missed your message In between my 2 messages.
Sorry no ovulation yet, but at least someone I'd enjoying the ttc process lol x

@Ladyinpink1 sorry to hear about AF arriving!

@BGxxx sorry you are having a hard time finding ovulation! Glad to hear your partner is enjoying themselves 😂 think my husband is going to enjoy this weekend! I'm due to ovulate on Tuesday so started DTD last night, done an LH this morning and got the flashing smiley so I'll keep tracking over the weekend to find the static then my TWW begins, I'd be due to find out right around Christmas so it'll either be great little Christmas surprise or I'll have to deal with AF!

Af just started for me so I’m out this month too 😓😓 I have just gone on holiday so very upset about having a horrible period in the sun, however will look forward to drinking more cocktails than I would have if I’d had a bfp! Good luck to anyone still in xxx

@PoppyPeaches so sorry to hear AF arrived and especially on holiday! But like you said you'll be able to enjoy cocktails! Doesn't take away from the disappointment though but I hope you will enjoy your holiday! Sending lots of well wishes your way that next month will be your month! 💕

@Jemmy94 i’m sorry AF showed up 😔 it’s so gutting

@Vanilla90 i keep trying to hold onto hope that I’ve shown I can get pregnant. But you start worrying don’t you. My last loss I had d&c, so now I’m worrying that has caused issues. Feel like I just constantly worry! It’s so difficult looking back on last year and how things are now.

@Ladyinpink1 i’m so sorry AF has arrived. How are you doing? Stupid question I know. Sending you lots of love

@BGxxx I’ve pretty much given up on lh tests now too. Only just under 2 weeks til my consultant phone call so will start thinking about next steps after that

@PoppyPeaches so sorry about AF. I hope being on holiday helps a little bit once it’s a new day tomorrow

@Ladyinpink1 Thanks, it's not so bad now... I think I might look at getting individual vitamins to and getting some tests done at the GP

@Figtree11 It is, but at least it's the start of another opportunity

@Figtree11 you do worry. I worry that I won't get pregnant. I worry that if I do, it could end in loss again. It's an emotional rollercoaster. How are you feeling about your phone call with the consultant?

@PoppyPeaches sorry that AF has arrived for you too. Hope you have a lovely holiday and make the most of the cocktails!

@Jess1066 fingers crossed that December is your month, hoping you get a BFP for Xmas!

@Ladyinpink1 thanks, I'm doing okay. Have been feeling a little down the last couple of days, like most of us with AF I guess, but not much we can do is there.

Some days I just feel so sorry for myself I have to be like shut the f up🤣🤣 do you all feel like it happens so easily for everyone but you?!!

I said to my friend I would love to get accidentally pregnant and she was like wtf is wrong with you. But how amazing to not have to stress and try and just end up with a baby

@Vanilla90 its very much an emotional rollercoaster. I’m pretty tired of being on this journey now.
I’m feeling ok at the moment, I just wish it would hurry up & I didn’t have to wait 2 weeks. They think I have APS syndrome, a blood clot disorder. So I should find out in this appt if it’s confirmed. And also testing for some other things. I’m just apprehensive some other things might be found, and that there might be a bad reason for the long cycles.

@BGxxx I feel sorry for myself a lot 😂 I feel very hard done by & that no one understands how I feel. When I know that some people do
understand, but I just feel very alone with it. I just can’t fathom how easily it can be for people. Someone at work is pregnant with their third, and the way she talks so optimistically about it all I just can’t get my head around

@Figtree11 I really struggle with people like that, one of my friends started trying in November and said if she wasn’t pregnant by December she was giving up, so I said oh what December next year? And she said no, this month🙃 so 1 month 🤣