TTC Aug 2024

[AlleycatMarie]

Hi ladies!
CD 1 for me today, so I’m moving over from the July thread and starting this one (don’t think there is already one).
Anyone else now ttc for a BFP in August??

I’m really pleased for you and hope your pregnancy progresses well. Sorry about your losses.

I remember getting an 8/9dpo positive and the wait to see if my period turned up was extremely anxious so it’ll be far more so given your context and history here. Look after yourself: your mind mainly.

I think it’s helpful in a time of no/little perceived control that you try to take some control back by deciding what your boundaries will be around things like testing to see line development, symptom spotting etc. Eg Maybe tell yourself you won’t do another test until your period is actually missed, or on a certain day. Maybe tell yourself you’ll not Google symptoms. It’s incredibly difficult to advise as it’s so personal and we’re all so different.

I’d also have a list of things you enjoy doing as distractions - mine are cleaning, listening to non-fertility related podcasts and music, walking, going to the gym, swimming, playing with my little one. When I feel myself dying to test, I tell myself things like “Maybe after swimming.” Often the desire to test fades away.

@LucyCL I am so happy for your bfp 🙏🙏🙏

I agree with also setting yourself some boundaries but also acknowledging that you seeking reassurance especially after what you’ve gone through is totally natural. I think you should book in some good distractions for yourself over the next few weeks (a nice meal out / a day trip somewhere over the weekend, going to the cinema or theatre, a long walk, reading a new book or getting into a new series etc)

Please keep me posted how you get on.

I am also 10 DPO today. I tested yesterday on the early detection as we had guests coming over for dinner and I wanted to know if I could have wine or not. BFN. This morning I had a big temp increase after expecting a drop for AF who is due. Wondering if I should go out and buy a digital now…

@OliveTraybake @Nay34 @lv565
Thank you so much for your lovely reassuring replies of comfort & advice. I really appreciate you all taking the time. I had a good cry last night, and although I am still feeling so disappointed today I am just trying to be more proactive and make a plan. I am going away on a lovely family holiday in September so I’ve got that to look forward to, and once I am home I will be contacting the GP and starting to get things rolling. Obviously I will continue to work on my physical & mental health in the meantime but as you have all said, it’s worth getting the GP involved as early as possible anyway.

@Zo85 @ScarlettSloth After DH saw the tests, he refused to get excited. I have now thrown all of them away because I am still feeling bad and it is almost like I am trying to refuse to believe this. I will carry on my life as usual and I have already noted down two dates I would start to bleed based on 2 MCs. 17/8/24 and 27/8/24. This is really sad because it should be something to celebrate whereas I just worry about what if it happens again and it would take 2 months for my cycle to get back to normal again.

Thank you so much for the advice and I will try my best to do non pregnancy related things.

@ScarlettSloth I expected my BBT to rise a little then drop tomorrow morning but it rose to the previous level before the drop (8 dpo and 9 dpo) so I did not think it would happen. Yes, please buy a digital test. If you have easy at home HCG test strips, it would also be great. Please keep me updated as well. :)

@elsa15 Oh my heart broke reading your words. Please do reach out to your GP. I know the NHS are traditionally terrible at not looking past weight, but I think they are better now at realising that there are lots of factors at play. I know you have been trying for a long time but you have plenty of time on your side, but now is the time to be brave and ask for some help. You could even go for day three bloods tomorrow to check your hormones. Let us know how you get on.

@LucyCL congratulations on your bfp. I do hope it goes well for you this time. I understand not getting hopes up straight away though. I had a mmc at 9 weeks so in my second pregnancy I was just negative about it waiting for it to happen again. It went well though and I got ds from it. I hope you have a positive outcome this time.

Oh when did you test, was this morning your first test?

Im 9dpo and to be honest I feel out this cycle.

Oh @Lou0811, I am so sorry. I know the grief of not having the happy family background and feeling so cheated. My parents were drug addicts when I was growing up and we were very isolated from our extended family and friends weren't allowed to play at my house etc. When my father died a few years ago, we weren't speaking but I have made my peace both with him and myself.

I am so sorry that your mum can't be the parent that you deserve, or the grandparent that your children deserve. I'm going to share a few lines from a book I read that helped me:

Learn to mother yourself. Find the places in you that feel hurt or stuck and give yourself the love that you need. Heal your relationship with your mother by holding a space for her and showing compassion for the difficulties she faced. Recognise that your mother's emotional absence was not your fault. Instead of seeing your mother as the person you want her to be, see her as she is.

(It is longer, but I have cut down, can send you the full bit if you want) ❤

@LucyCL Those tests all look great for 10dpo. I don't have any practical advice but I'm very happy for you. I understand your nervousness, but hopefully you and DH will get excited soon enough.

As you have your mira, can you keep tracking your progesterone and other hormones for a bit of reassurance?

Hey @CoolSummer89 - that’s so lovely, that snippet.

I did reach out actually and just say that I’m very open, not judgemental etc and I want to understand why she is the way she is. I’ve had no response. I have asked this 3/4
times previously, in a non heated way. Totally ignored. So it is what it is.

im sorry to hear about your childhood and your dad’s passing. I imagine it’s hard to grieve? I keep thinking about when the time comes for my mum, my best friend always says, in a non-unkind way, I’ll be free as such…

how are you at the minute, do you have any news? Xx

@LucyCL beautiful news, congratulations! Sorry, just been searching for your post!

practical advice, all you can do is take each day as it comes and be easy on yourself. No over exertion xx

@Lou0811 My period has just finished, but feeling very happy that my bloodwork came back with no problems.

Have you spoken to EPU?

Hello everyone! Good luck to you all, hoping we get lots of BFP's on this group.

@elsa15 I am in a similar position, I am 33 TTC for my first and it has been over a year now, all of my friends have children, some are even starting secondary school. I have a gorgeous nephew who is 3 and recently found out I am going to be an aunty again, which is wonderful news but i long for a baby myself, I want them to all grow up together and have a lifetime of friendships, I really hope it happens soon!

I have seeked help from my Dr and have had the blood tests and TV scan, partner has had sperm analysis, all looks ok but booked in for further tests in October. The wait lists do seem long on the NHS so i would advise to go soon so you can get the process started.

I am using the Clearblue ovulation tests and this week i have had 5 days of flashing smileys (I usually have 3 days max), is it normal to have 5 days of flashing? I did change my vitamins a month or so ago so wonder if that has something to do with it!

Excellent news, fingers crossed for this month! Will it be your first?

EPU have got me in for bloods on Monday and Weds. the midwife said that results of my ultrasound are quite common and apparently that kind of cyst is what boosts progesterone?

not sure!

I’m going to do a clear blue this weekend to try and get clarity on weeks.

I brushed my teeth today and felt incredibly sick after! I suffered with HG with my 2 children, so I’m hoping it’s not as horrific this time x

@Blue2020 Thank you for sharing your experience. Eventually I will feel better but it is going to be a while. I tested this morning (10 dpo). Finger crossed for you!
@CoolSummer89 I will keep using Mira to monitor this. I am glad that your bloodwork came back fine and I hope this will be a new positive cycle for you!
@Lou0811 Very wise and I shall follow it with no expectations.
@Marshmallow99 I had 10 days of "High"s from CBFM then got the peak last cycle. Our body does not function like clockwork. However I have the feeling that it was Maca powder which delayed my ovulation. I doubt vitamins will delay your O day unless you take vitamins B6 and E in the follicular phase. I did that for both cycles post CP, and I ovulated really late. Of course, I also took Maca powder at the same time. I don't know why I ovulated late. This cycle I stopped taking Maca powder and ovulated on time.
@elsa15 I saw your post yesterday and wanted to say something however I was also in a similar mood. I was really sad and negative. I have seen a picture named The fertility iceberg. It is so true for all of us trying to conceive. You are doing everything you can to increase the chance of pregnancy by reducing your BMI which is great. If I were you, I'd also do fertility MOT and sperm analysis for the other half just to get an idea. I also felt super lonely in this ttc journey and I sometimes just feel so negative like yesterday. It comes and goes. The good news is nothing lasts forever as long as you keep improving your health. I also find taking extra vitamins useful because I had low estrogen and progesterone last cycle. The egg quality is super important and CoQ10 is the one to take. Probably you already knew everything I mentioned. I find it hard to talk about my ttc journey among relatives and families because I am afraid that they would judge me. I find it useful to write my feelings down in a diary. This is a good way to release all your negative feelings. Nowadays I post threads on mumsnet because people here understand how I feel and my situation. I hope you will feel better and please keep being cautiously positive! If you really struggle, you could download Headspace to help you to meditate. People here will also help you and try their best to answer your questions. You are not alone.

I just had a chance to read your post. I am really sorry that your mum has treated you this way. Although I have very supportive parents, I still empathise with you. From what I have read, you gave me the feeling that you are very strong mentally and will not let your mum ruin your happiness. If I were you, I'd not treat what she has said seriously and keep enjoying my life. Easier said than done. There might be something which your mum doesn't want to talk about which means you have to have a heart to heart conversation with her. Both of you should open your hearts. Of course, you can ask her directly why she is treating you like this. She might be angry and say nasty things to you but if you really want to get the answer, you will need to be brave. I know what I have said might not be very useful but I hope the relationship between you and your mum will improve.

@Lou0811 So sorry you’re dealing with this. That must be so difficult to navigate. It’s 100% her own issues that are making her behave in this way and absolutely nothing to do with you!

I’m not sure if you’re into personal development or have read much on this topic? I’ve been learning about it a bit because my dad is a narcissist and emotional abused me as a child. 9 years ago he finally told me and my sisters he never wanted to see us again and we haven’t heard from him since. It’s like you have to grieve someone who hasn’t died. Anyway, I’ve found Whitney Goodman (Instagram account sitwithit ) great for helping me to navigate this and understand him a bit more. She talks about all the different relationships in our lives (siblings, in laws, parents, family estrangements etc…) 💖

Just took a CB digital - BFN. Hoping AF arrives soon so I can get my next cycle started ASAP 🙏🙏 hopefully one month closer to having my baby x

Attention all ladies!!
Im ttc after a MMC in December 23. Ovulation was apparently on 6/8. With last pregnancy, I ovulated very early in cycle. I've been watching out for CM and signs of cramps. Couple of days ago had the egg white CM and stretchy clear, so thought that was ovulation. However, today I've got a day off and partner is on nights so thought "let's have a try" I don't know what came over me today but have been so sexually aroused all day. Normally I'm up for it whenever but today was different level. a lot of CM and was so up for it when it came to DTD, could ovulation have crept up on me today? Period's due in 12 days. All opinions welcome. Am 23 trying for baby #1 🥰

@ttcttcjourney20001 that all sounds like positive signs that ovulation is imminent... Definitely try and dtd again tomorrow if you can!
If you track your temp or use opks you could get a better idea of when your ovulation is.

I don't usually track my temp or do kits. Since losing last pregnancy I've gone a bit baby crazy, buying loads of tests and it's completely taken over. My partner said it's changed me and as much as he wants a baby, said we can't lose ourselves in the process so we've agreed to stop trying and testing as the disappointment each month gets worse. The pressure I feel isn't helping, so just going off what my CM is and how I'm feeling. He's got the weekend off so will definitely try and DTD this weekend. I feel as though this cycle will be different - but I think it every cycle. Trying not to get my hopes us! 🥰🥰

I totally get that. It was really hard after my first miscarriage. I did that same and stepped away from the tests and things for a bit. I conceived my son 2 months after my miscarriage 💜

Congratulations @LucyCL . I can imagine how nervous you will be with past losses. Just focus on the here and now. You are pregnant, enjoy it.
Maybe speak to your doctor to see if they advise taking any medication to help this little one stick?

Congratulations! I set my self a time in the day to let myself worry if that makes sense? I had a mmc and a blighted ovem in the same year and my third pregnancy I felt anxious throughout - but setting aside a small amount of time each day seemed to help. I started my hypnobirthing stuff late - but if I manage to conceive another bubba, I wiuld do it earlier as it was definitely very good at calming me!

@LucyCL would you mind sharing your graph please? I would like to see your temp if that’s ok? Just thinking for future cycles. I know they can vary a lot it’s just to see examples of bfp ones.

I did use bbt last time but I stopped at 4dpo because I went on holiday. So I never saw the progression in the end.

Today is 12dpo. My pup was taken ill the last couple of days, endless amounts of stress has taken its toll on me.
I forgot to test but I did test last night and BFN. Then this morning I went for the first wee of the day and completely forgot to test again.

I feel like I am out for this month. I thought by now I would feel quite different and experience some symptoms but I haven't felt anything recently. I think the symptoms I experienced must be purely the hormones after ovulation.

I think my next cycle I will track bbt, where do I even start?