TTC #1 no previous pregnancies cycle #6 - looking for others in the same boat!

[MocktailMe]

Hi all.

As per the title, TTC first baby, I've never had a confirmed pregnancy before. I'm 31, bf is 27.

Been trying to conceive 9 months, but due to PCOS only 6 cycles.

This year I've lost weight, and my cycles since January have varied from 28 days to 38 days. Had PCOS confirmed, and currently waiting for an appointment with gynaecologist to see if I need further assistance. Appointment is taking its sweet time so for now doing it the old fashioned way still with plenty of hope (at least some days, not so much others!!!).

I'm currently on cycle day number 28, negative tests, no signs of a period in sight, CM up to my eyeballs and a whole heap of doubt over when ovulation occured!!

If you are :

TTC #1
A woman who has never been pregnant
Pissing on sticks at an ALARMING rate
Potentially with PCOS but healthy ovaries welcome 😁

Then PLEASE join my thread, so in need of buddies in a similar boat! ⛵

No offence to those TTC #2 or more, genuinley ❤️ just hoping to speak to people who also have no idea what pregnancy would feel like, and who also maybe have the fear they CANNOT ever get pregnant ❤️

@KTB34 I know, it's very hard to see the woods from the trees especially so soon after everything you've been through. I will say that the first few weeks / months immediately after my loss I felt like I might die if I didn't get pregnant again soon. But it does calm down and while I still am desperate to be pregnant, I know my body probably needs a bit of time and I just have to be patient with myself. Hope you are holding up ok!

@Waitingformiracle I’m still living in a bit of a daze at the moment. I’ve got another hospital appt tomorrow where it’s likely I’ll need medical management now 😔

We’ve spoken about trying again once we are ready too, I also was at the start of some investigations with my GP so will be calling back once things have settled to start that process again.

What I’ve learnt in this process is just how neglected women’s health care is!

@KTB34 I'm sorry that you will have to have medical management. It's been a long ordeal for you guys, I hope they can help you quickly so that you can start your physical recovery. I agree, it's such an eye opener what women have to go through. I swear if men had to go through all this the human race would come to an end 😂

@Waitingformiracle thank you. I hope so, I need to get back to some normality!

The human race would be extinct! 🤣

Here's hoping for us all ladies ❤️❤️❤️

No sign of my period yet, I hate this stage of limbo x

Ohhh, fingers crossed for you ❤️

Have you tested today?

No I haven't. I just can't bear to see another negative. I might test again in the morning but at this stage I'm either too late for a positive to turn up, or potentially ovulated much later and testing too early! What a minefield.

Good luck for your appointment tomorrow ❤️

@MocktailMe thank you! Let us know how you get on x

Fingers are crossed this limbo is worth it @MocktailMe. I've had that a couple of times now when the vitamins have kicked in and made my period 4 days later, it's a confusing time. Keep us updated!

I've been in a weird mood this month where I've been so laid back about it I almost forgot that we need to have sex for this to work 😅 I've just entered my fertile days and realised I need to get on it or nothing's going to happen. Wish I could feel like this every month and I'm sure it won't last! I have been trying to focus on other things going on in life which definitely helps.

My hertility test results came back, mostly looking good although I have higher than average AMH which suggests polycystic ovaries - have had a scan a few years ago which showed cysts and I have been feeling the relevant symptoms recently so I'm going to go to the GP and try to steer them to give me a pelvic ultrasound and see if I have a giant cyst or something. Also have lower than average estrogen so it'll be interesting to see what the consultant says about that when I have a call with them this week as I don't fully understand what effect that has. And next steps is to get DH tested.

It's strange at the moment, I'm mainly in the mind set of it will take as long as it takes, but every time I see a baby or small child I almost feel sick with how much I want to be pregnant. Logic fighting broodiness I think!

@Tater05 hope you’re well.

If you have Spotify you need to listen to this podcast - https://open.spotify.com/episode/24k9iyxJnHvTKIw1FEyiwU?si=l3VC9DWOSpqO-z4Cg49vpg

I learnt so much about hormones, PCOS etc

Hi all!
I have been a silent reader this month trying to learn lots but want to join in the convo! First cycle trying to conceive baby number 1. I have been off the pill for 18 months after 8 years on it, have been trying to get used to my cycle. I generally have 32-34 day cycles and ovulate D18. This month I had a high OPK D17, peak D18 which was Saturday. DTD D15,17,18. Then yesterday I had EWCM!!! I usually get that the day of my peak but I thought I was 3DPO? So DTD again last night. Confused now as to whether I’m 4DPO or 1DPO. Has anyone else had that?
anyway good luck everyone this is definitely a confusing journey! 🥰

Also listen to this one -

https://open.spotify.com/episode/40cChEuyaDV9jgI5uYQblt?si=2iX6dbeQQ-yNEyuVObFo2w&context=spotify%3Ashow%3A12IYOLH9liu60gk5D0bRPk&t=462

This one is about PCOS and talks about estrogen might help you understand what it’s for x

@Tater05 I am feeling the exact same way this cycle. Super chilled and just like if it happens it happens, who am I!?! 🤣 I'm sure it will be short lived but I'm enjoying it for now. I think it's easy to get a bit of burn out from all the tracking and trying

Hey welcome!

Yes I have this a lot!!! EWCM doesn't always seem to add up to LH tests.

The thing is, the LH can surge but you can fail to ovulate. If you temp you'll be able to know afterwards if the peak OPK test did lead to ovulation or not. Some of us like me have multiple surges a month!!!

Which kind of leads me to where I am today. Still no sign of my period, still negative as of this morning. Which means the darkest positive OPK I got still didn't lead to ovulation 😭

I don't know when to expect my period now at all, as I stopped testing around the 25th, as hadn't had another high LH test, and seemed too late! So I thought I'd got it this month!

So totally sick of this now. Honestly wish I was just doing IVF immediately, as I don't know how much longer I can keep tracking and testing and trying. It's soul destroying!!!

Ahh thank you for your reply. I have seen lots about BBT & might try that next month if unsuccessful next month. Didn’t want to do too much all at once for the first go! bless you it must be exhausting.
How long have you been trying?

I've been trying since September last year. Which feels a very very long time ago now.

I've never used BBT as there are lots of factors to consider to make it accurate. Also because I have tried all sorts of things and at this point I just don't think adding another thing to track is going to be of any benefit.

@MocktailMe are your cycles regular ?

I found mine weren’t after coming off the pill so when I had a ‘period’ I tested with an OPK and found I was ovulating much later than the internet says I should be. Have you tried to test every day after your period stops?

@ktb34 no, they've been between 28-38 days this last year; I've not been on hormonal birth control for over ten years either, I've used non hormonal methods.

I have never tested every single day of the month no. This cycle I tested every day from period until CD 25, I had already had my positive peak before then anyway. I must have stopped testing too early, and missed a second peak, which means I've ovulated later than ever before. Which I'm pretty upset about, as we had sex every other day between CD3 and CD25 then had just a few days break before having more sporadic sex.

@MocktailMe I’m so sorry must be so frustrating for you. There’s so many posts on here so you may have already answered these but -

1. Have you seen a specialist ?
2. Have you tried inofolic ?
3. Also some people aka myself too don’t actually ovulate every month 😔 don’t put too much pressure on yourself as stress can be a big factor too!

Hey yeah I've seen specialists and have a hysterosalpingogram coming up, sperm test due next month and been given tablets already to regulate my cycle. I know there's a lot on here so don't worry!

I don't really worry about the stress thing personally - I think if I had physical symptoms of stress and was rapidly losing weight etc that would have a knock on effect, but I think general frustration, sadness and anger over infertility aren't playing any sort of role here. As I often see said on here people do fall pregnant in active warfare, and what I'm going through is nothing compared to that thank god.

I'm just extra annoyed and upset this month because after 25 OPKS, one peak and 15 attempts TTC to find out I didn't even ovulate when I thought I did is such a smack in the face :(

When you have anovulatory cycles do you simply skip a period and go around 60 days? Or do you have a short bleed? I always have a bleed but wondering if that can still be a cycle without ovulation? I'm sorry to hear you go through those, it is such a waste of time and very cruel when it's all you want to happen :(

@MocktailMe I’m glad you’ve been referred ! When is your procedure ? Are you finding the tablet is helping ?

I know easier said than done but don’t always assume it’s your fault, without sounding awful it could be an issue on your partners side too, or both! I think naturally as women we always just assume it’s our fault.

When I stopped my pill I didn’t have any periods for 6 months. I had light spotting each month not enough to even fill a pantyliner (sorry TMI). But I was testing on the OPK’s and getting a peak for the last 3 times I tried, so I must have ovulated in Aug because we fell pregnant. But whether that was by chance who knows ! I’ve been back to the GP again today to be referred for another US even though I’ve already had a private one 🙄

I don't have a date yet - it has to be done on day 10 of my cycle so as soon as I start bleeding I'll be able to ring and get it booked, hopefully soon!

The tablets no absolutely not somehow! Last month a 22 day cycle, this month day 36 and counting. I think I might stop taking them, as this is actually more irregular than before! Before it was generally 28-33 - with a couple of longer ones over a year tracking.

I'm very hopeful my partners sperm test will come back very good - I don't have the energy for any more battles I think! I'm hoping clomid will be enough - but I'm not allowed it until his test comes back clear.

I wonder if the light bleeds are your real normal without birth control? Does seem very light but don't lose hope - you got pregnant once which means your ovulation is working at least!

Sorry you have to go for another scan I'm sure you just want this over now :( what does he want to scan you for?

@MocktailMe good luck! When it does come round, I hope it will be a quick procedure for you!

That’s annoying about the tablets, I’d be so annoyed and probably chuck them 🤣

I’m sure it will all be fine, just have to try and stay positive.

I was on the pill for so long I don’t actually remember what my periods were like before I assume normal because I can remember always dreading it coming.

I’ve asked for a confirmation of PCOS because I have 2 out for the 3 ‘criteria’ and I’d like to know for definite so I can focus on next steps but they won’t accept the results from my private scan…so another wait 🤣

Thanks @KTB34 for the podcast links, I'll check them out! And so annoying that they won't accept your private scan. Is that the only thing holding them off from confirming PCOS?

So I most likely have polycystic ovaries but I don't know if I have pcos. I don't think I tick 2 of the 3 criteria for it, so I think it's just PCO. I had the Hertility consultation and the lady gave me some good advice such as to follow the PCOS diet which I'd never heard of. She also seemed to think that 8 months really isn't that long to have been trying, I suppose she sees a whole range of TTC journeys but it's made me a bit more relaxed about it.

I'm supposed to be ovulating soon but I have no idea what's going on with my LH testing or my BBT. Both charts are all over the place which is the first month since starting testing that it's not been consistent. Starting to wonder if I ovulated earlier and I've missed it (also would have missed dtd at the right time if that's the case) or maybe I'm not ovulating this month so I kinda feel like I'm out already. So I'm just going to wait for AF to arrive again 😅

How's everyone getting on?

Hey @Tater05

I think on balance of everyone in the world 8 months likely isn't so long, but it certainly feels it! The thing is for every person I see on here saying they fell first time there are also many for whom it took years - I think we just hone in on the first time people enviously and so seems to be more of them!

I'm joining you firmly in the no idea what's going on camp. I'm on cycle day 37 with zero of my usual pre period symptomsz except possibly a bit of PMS - but honestly I'm quite an angry person generally so really might not be 😆

It's extra annoying as I'm waiting to get this HSG booked - there's a few dates in November I'll be away for, and I didn't think it would clash at all with future cycle day 10 (which I expected to be in October) nun but my periods so late now that it actually might! In which case I'll be stuck waiting again til December!

It's definitely still possible that your ovulation is yet to happen - so keep DTD as it's possible this IS your fertile period - or that it's on the way. You never know right?