TTC #1 no previous pregnancies cycle #6 - looking for others in the same boat!

[MocktailMe]

Hi all.

As per the title, TTC first baby, I've never had a confirmed pregnancy before. I'm 31, bf is 27.

Been trying to conceive 9 months, but due to PCOS only 6 cycles.

This year I've lost weight, and my cycles since January have varied from 28 days to 38 days. Had PCOS confirmed, and currently waiting for an appointment with gynaecologist to see if I need further assistance. Appointment is taking its sweet time so for now doing it the old fashioned way still with plenty of hope (at least some days, not so much others!!!).

I'm currently on cycle day number 28, negative tests, no signs of a period in sight, CM up to my eyeballs and a whole heap of doubt over when ovulation occured!!

If you are :

TTC #1
A woman who has never been pregnant
Pissing on sticks at an ALARMING rate
Potentially with PCOS but healthy ovaries welcome 😁

Then PLEASE join my thread, so in need of buddies in a similar boat! ⛵

No offence to those TTC #2 or more, genuinley ❤️ just hoping to speak to people who also have no idea what pregnancy would feel like, and who also maybe have the fear they CANNOT ever get pregnant ❤️

I don’t even know what they are!😨there’s so much I don’t know. To be honest, I had completely forgotten everything about a menstrual cycle. I went on contraception 10+ years because I thought you could get pregnant any day of the month… now I realise it’s not so easy!😅

Hello❤to be honest, I thought my cycle had straightened itself out already, 3 months in a row it was 25 days. Then this month we’re up to day 32. I can’t believe I have to go through this calculation every month… the two week wait must be horrible when it’s month after month after month. I hope we can conceive quickly so that I can relax. Until then I think I’ll be on tenterhooks.

Nooo that’s ok! We are in the same boat i’m on cycle 1 and learnt SO MUCH! The only reason I asked was because they biffed up my cycle xx

@MocktailMe and friends fyi we got the sperm tests back and they were normal.

So it looks like I’m medium normal - my eggs and stuff are fine - no cysts just slightly irregular periods.

My partners sperm are good (woohoo!)

I’m going to continue to track ovulation really focussing on timing things and we’ll both continue to try and lose weight.

We’ve got lots of holidays this year so hopefully we can just keep doing what we’re doing and then see if we want to look at IVF or other options.

@CharLdn that's fantastic news! I am so very pleased for you!

Hopefully this means no barriers to natural conception, however strong sperm is still a big plus for IVF as means no sperm treatment required beforehand, and no need for donor sperm. Makes the process much cheaper and easier so no matter which way it pans out healthy sperm is brilliant news for you.

So nice to get some good news on here :)

Hi Ladies, well BFN for me today on 14DPO. Just waiting for AF to start now! This will be cycle 4 since my loss but I guess cycle 11 in total when you count the 7 before. We have booked in to see a fertility specialist on Monday. Has anyone ever done or discussed IUI with their doctor? We got my husbands third SA back and his numbers have improved a lot through the lifestyle changes we have been making but they're still pretty low in terms of our chances of conceiving on our own. Although I know we did once I can't help feeling that we just got really really lucky that time and then obviously very unlucky with what happened. Feeling good to at least be talking with someone to see what our options would be!

@SRH hi and welcome 🤗 hope it doesn't take too long to get your BFP!!

@CharLdn I really like the sound of a month off even though I'm sure it's been hard! All the travelling should hopefully do wonders for distracting you! I was away hiking last week and it was great because it got me through the first few days of the TWW and I really didn't think about it much, so hopefully it will do that for you!

@KTB34 that's so frustrating about your scan, can you go back for another this week? Hopefully you get to see your little bean then 😊

@ToomanyBFNs I'm sure that was difficult to hear but also great to have an action plan for when you feel like you can't keep trying on your own! I know we'd all love to conceive by ourselves without having to go through all that but the success rates with IVF are really good so it's so great to have it in the back pocket if all else fails!

As a total newbie to this, should I be tracking my ovulation? When do I track it, every day? My period is currently 5 days late but all tests are negative. If and when my period arrives, how long after that do I start doing the Clear Blue ovulation tests? Thank you so much for advice xx

I really hope it’s good news for you soon xx

@SRH would highly recommend tracking ovulation

you can either track discharge - normally around ovulation you get more egg white consistency discharge

or body temp - there’s a dip then rise of ovulation - I use natural cycles so it tells my phone

and some people do lh tests - these you pee on and it tells you when you’ve ovulated/peak time to have sex is

you’ve only got a 25% chance of conceiving if you have sex on the right day - so it means you know your timing is right.

that said if you’re having sex every 2-3 days throughout the month you’d probably have a good chance anyway.

hope that’s helpful! Basically the first 3-6 months we were trying to conceive I’m not sure we were even having sex on the right day….

You can track ovulation or you can have sex every 3 days over the mid two weeks of your cycle it's really up to you!

@Waitingformiracle I'm really sorry to hear you're out this month I know how hard it is :( look after yourself, I hope your period won't last too long and then before you know it it will be fertile time again. I know it's easy for me to say but you guys managed to do it once, I'm sure your partners sperm can do it again!

Thank you so much @MocktailMe I really appreciate the support. You’re right I need to just focus on fertile week rolling around not too soon! As much as I hate getting my period I actually prefer just getting it once I know I’m out so I can start my new cycle. I’m sure you can all relate!

Yes I absolutely do, once I know there's no hope left I'm raring to just get my period and onto the next. Also, during my period (after the first rush of sadness) I usually find some peace in it being one of the only times all month that I don't need to worry about timing DTD, or symptom spotting/ovulation testing etc. Mine only last 3 days and they are usually the only 3 days in the month where I know exactly where I am and what my body is doing! I try to see it as a little break from the rollercoaster, and look ahead to hope for the next month ❤️

@MocktailMe thats a really great way of looking at it! A few little days to ourselves a month where we don’t need to stress about it all. I also let myself indulge in the extra cup of coffee or extra wine without feeling guilty (not that I’m too strict any other time of the month haha). Still waiting to start now but my temperatures have dropped so it should be today!

@SRH i definitely find tracking ovulation helps but it really depends, if you guys are very sexually active every couple of days you might just want to keep doing that for a few cycles. For me I just find our lives are too hectic and we would probably be missing ovulation if we did it that way, so I do track to make sure we are hitting the right days. Although I’m going to take a break from the tracking this month, it does take a toll after a while. I know @MocktailMe got some good advice from a doctor on this who said just to have unprotected sex every couple of days.

Love this way of thinking!

New strange symptom that I haven't had before. Checked my CM this morning and it's mostly creamy but tinged with brown almost jelly like substance. Have never had this before, even right before my period. Usually goes straight from white to definite wet blood.

I'm cycle day 22 today. My last cycle was 30 days long, although they vary from 28-38. I haven't had a positive OPK all month. Flo thinks I ovulated on Saturday, it's possible but also possible I'm ovulating today. Who knows!!!

Does anyone else ever experience this? I know brown means old blood. Could it mean my period is coming extremely early? Or more likely to be ovulation? Or even, the much talked about, but never seen, implantation blood?

I wish I'd got a positive OPK or simply never taken them. A month full of negative means I really have no idea what's going on.

My boobs are sore which is usually a sign ovulation is over for me. I did have small amounts of EWCM but that was about a week ago.

Sorry to hear you got a BFN @Waitingformiracle, fingers crossed for you on this next cycle. Thanks for the kind words too.

@MocktailMe I’m really sorry but I don’t know if I can help on this one. I sometimes get a bit of jelly like CM around ovulation but it’s not normally brown. At day 22 it could be implantation bleeding although I did read it’s normally redder than brown but obviously I’ve not had it so I don’t know!

Yes I've always heard pink or red but I'm not sure its not just a Mumsnet myth 😂

I'm leaning towards thinking it must be that my period is coming earlier than usual. I didn't start OPK until cycle day 13 so it's possible I would have had a peak on cycle day 11 or 12 if I had tested. That would mean period is due in only four days time which would make the old blood make sense. I've never ovulated so early before if that is the case, but I am on Metformin so should expect changes to my cycle.

@MocktailMe I have had this immediately before or after my period on rare occasions. I will say I did also have brown discharge when I was pregnant, so that's definitely a possibility but it wasn't this early so I'm not sure. Have you taken a test yet or is it too early?

Still no sign of my period, it's so strange as I am 15DPO now and my tests are extremely negative lol.

Welcome @SRH! I would recommend tracking ovulation but it can make you a bit obsessive after a few months of it! I only started testing with LH strips after the 3rd month of trying and it turned out I was ovulating quite late on in my cycle so we'd been missing the window by a few days each month. The PreMom app is good, you can upload your test strip results and it puts everything on a graph.

@MocktailMe I've had a bit of brown in my CM before, I can't remember if it was when I was on the mini pill or if it was after I'd had mid-cycle bleeding (which is why I went on the mini pill). My guess would be that it's old blood but I wouldn't know what from!

I'm coming up to the fertile window now and I'm going to order some testing from Hertility. You have to use it on the 3rd day of your period so at least this month if I'm not pregnant and my period arrives I won't have wasted £150! Might soften it a bit.
I was a bit fed up last week when AF hung around for the full 7 days, was heavier and more painful than usual as well so I started to worry about what if I have endometriosis. Some of the symptoms I had a few years ago before I was on the pill would tie in with that and I'm slightly concerned that the pill had just covered them up, so my plan now is to do the Hertility tests and see if anything comes up there, see how my next couple of periods are then go to the GP about those endo-like symptoms and by then it would be coming up to a year of trying anyway. Saying all that, I do wish I could forget about it all and not have a plan and maybe that would help it happen but I don't think I can not have a plan 😅

@Tater05 I did the Hertility test and I found it really helpful! It ended up telling me that my thyroid levels were not good for TTC and then when I gave the results to the fertility clinic they looked into it and sure enough I needed some medication for my thyroid. It’s well worth it I think (although I obviously hope that you end up pregnant this month and don’t need to use it at all!🤞)

Thanks ladies......seems like nothing I should be worried about in any case! It has increased quite a lot over the course of the day - unsure if it is in my underwear as they're black...but checked CM with fingers and just a lot more of the same, plus on toilet roll pinky brown.

Hard not to get my hopes up, but also hard not to worry this means I have something (else!!) wrong with me too. So equal parts hope and fear, although fear is a little stronger. I've been worried maybe I cut myself using the syringes or something but seems really unlikely as they are completely smooth and nothing actually hurts! Just strange, I've obsessed over every part of my cycle and never seen this in the last year.

Regarding hertility I haven't used personally, don't think it would be worthwhile since I already know I have PCOS, but I've seriously heard great stuff, and I really think knowledge is power in the TTC game! If anything comes back at least you are armed ready to visit the GP! Of course, here's hoping the kit ends up sold on eBay and isn't needed at all!!!

Thanks for all getting back to me today, it means a lot!

@MocktailMe fingers crossed for you that this is a positive sign!!

@MocktailMe I’m keeping my fingers crossed that this is a positive sign for you 🤞🏻🤞🏻

Hello sorry to jump in on this. I’ve been trying to find reviews of the hertility tests… we’re right at the beginning of our TTC journey so I don’t want to start obsessing already and I’m worried that a test might throw up something which then puts me on edge. I know Randox do an in person blood test for around the same price so I might do that. Has your doctor repeated the blood tests to see if your levels have improved? xx

@SRH I actually did it right at the beginning of trying because I wanted to know if there was anything wrong, but I was 32 (I’m not sure how old you are) so I was a bit more concerned that things could be starting to decline. I’ve had lots of blood tests since and my thyroid levels are now where they need to be for TTC thanks to the medication. It did help me get pregnant once but sadly it didn’t work out, I’m hoping it will help me again but we are also dealing with male factor issues so things aren’t so easy. Otherwise my hertility test showed that things were as they should be for my age which was a relief!