CD1 ttc after loss carry on thread #3

[Ladyinpink1]

I went to reply and you were right, the thread was full so I couldnt post a link to a new thread, also, because it's a new thread it wont give me a prediction to tag when I type a name, so I have just copied and paste the names off of everyone who posted on the very last page of the thread, I hope anyone else can find it OK. Sorry, maybe there is an easier better way... if anyone else can remember extra names and spellings, please tag 🙂

@samilicious

@Wise0wl

@ThelastRolo20

@13lucy

@Bugdem123

@HerbaceousPerennial

@Ladyinpink1 rubbish that you're not seeing anything so far, DH is the worst for getting my hopes up too. Even if he just talks about stuff or mentions a chance of having another it gets me hopeful like it's real. AF came in full force for me a day late on Sunday, but don't feel too bad about it. I've only ever conceived when I haven't done much apart from vitamins to 'try' and focused on myself and being happy so that's what I'm doing for the next 6 months, while exploring tests with GP to ease worries. I know it feels like giving up but it's more and more liberating the more I forget about it all. Hope you're ok - I recommend ordering fancy choc to cushion the AF blow, and if you don't need it, celebration choc!

@13lucy hey Lucy! Don't apologise, we all need breaks sometimes. Glad the mindfulness course is helping, I'm trying to get back into some meditation stuff on that Headspace app - this has spurred me on to keep at it! Hope the holiday has the same effect on you it had on clueless and you come back to an ovulation / BFP soon after.

My ultrasound was during my period and I rang up to ask if it was ok and accidentally called a pub (I’d not long booked for an Xmas cheeseboard evening 🤪) they had to stop me talking 'WOAH WOAH WOAH - THIS IS THE GLEBE' 😅 only me. I think I actually cried with embarrassment. They could still see all the follicle stuff even then so don't worry too much.

@moosey89 so sorry to hear about possible redundancy. My DH is the same - 3 in 3 years - after working at the same place for forever. Swapped jobs then was always the 'last one in' so first one out, regardless of his performance topping others. Big hugs to you - hopefully it doesn't happen but here for you if it does

@Bugdem123 good on you for trying anyway - I think worrying about how we're going to feel in future helps weirdly. Like I always stress myself out so much with worry, then the time comes and I've already done half the sads / processing so it cushions the blow a bit. Like my friend's DD let slip she was pregnant months before she announced, by friend said her DD was just saying it because she wanted it to happen - but even that made me prepare for it happening soon.

Welcome @Prettypennies and @UrsulaSings123
I have an almost 3 year old and had TFMR just before she was just under 2. Here for any support you need ♥️

@Wise0wl ooh spotting on and off! Fingers crossed x

@Ladyinpink1 so sorry about the BFN. I hope though that it means you can take your medicines and get over your cough.
What do you take at the moment? Might mean we can share ideas for what to do next month? I’m 36 so share your worries about age.

@UrsulaSings123 oh don't worry about me, we aren't trying until April anyway so I was almost wanting AF to arrive (can you imagine?).

You can have a positive OPK with HCG still in the system if it's low enough 😄 I had positives for 3 weeks and period came on week 4 so I must have overlapped x

@samilicious that's amazing - the pub must have been very confused 😂

@Ladyinpink1 I'm okay thanks - on countdown now to my 12 week scan on Saturday. It's hard not to catastrophise about things that might have gone wrong since my last scan, but I just have to keep reminding myself that I have no reason to suppose anything is wrong and that the odds are in my favour at this point. It's definitely hard to just assume everything's fine though after a previous loss.
I'm sorry to hear it was a BFN for you - you never know though, every pregnancy is different so having early BFPs before doesn't necessarily mean it would happen this time. I wouldn't worry too much about your age either (easier said than done, I know!) - I saw a really interesting article linked on another thread about the stats on fertility at over 35 and I was amazed to see that they are based on records from the 17th century! Definitely worth a read and it might give you some reassurance that TTC is more favourable to over-35s than people generally think: https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/magazine-24128176

@Wise0wl Sorry to hear you are feeling poorly at the moment. And it's totally understandable and natural to feel both anticipation and fear at the prospect of being pregnant again. Some of the stuff on this thread about positive affirmations is brilliant and definitely might be useful here for trying to think positively about it. I really hope you get good news this week. ❤

@UrsulaSings123 Have a lovely time in Paris!

@samilicious Another classic moment, I hope you're keeping a record of all of these for the book that you have to write. 😂

Hi all, decided I needed a little break from the app. Currently 9dpo and think I've got a very very faint line. Did a test last night and saw a shadow of a line but know its still quite early. Not sure how I feel about it, was certain we were out this month as only managed to dtd 4 and 5 days before ovulation because of dh working away. Trying to not get my hopes up but I've ordered some frers to do tomorrow.

Anyone else see a line? The pic isn't as clear

@NphysT I see it!! Fingers crossed it develops 🥰

@NphysT I think I can see it too. Fingers crossed 🤞

I just had a tiny bit of pink spotting when I wiped and now wish I’d tested this morning as I know I need to take progesterone from a positive test, but also it’s still a bit early (probably about 9DPO, AF tomorrow) for a test not using FMU. I definitely can’t test tomorrow as have a big meeting at work and don’t want to be distracted, so will have to wait for Thursday as planned. I wish this didn’t take up so much of my brain all the time!

@Wise0wl is it worth testing tonight after a hold? I wonder if you'd prefer knowing and being able to start progesterone early and risking a BFN disappointment, as opposed to finding out on two days and wishing you'd known earlier?

Never easy is it?!

@ThelastRolo20 maybe. But the crushing disappointment of a BFN the night before a big day at work is also a risk to take…! It is never easy. It really does feel like a very exhausting real-life version of one of those ‘choose your own adventure’ story books!

Could you test tonight and get OH to check the test maybe as an alternative to you checking it yourself?

Thank you @UrsulaSings123 and you are in good company, I always take my opks with me, nothing more romantic than filling a pot with wee and opk dipping in a fancy hotel 😂. Hooe you have a lovely trip x

Thank you @samilicious and I'm sorry your af arrived, are you going for the relaxed approach this cycle then? That's what I have been considering for this next cycle, just relinquishing control and no opks or bbt and try to dtd whenever we can. Chocolate always sounds good lol. Ha ha I laughed at the thought of you shocking the poor barman. x

Thank you @Wise0wl Hoping for good news for you, dud you end up testing or are you still waiting? I was thinking of the relaxed approach, no opks or bbt (but still pineapple lol, maybe brazil nuts, seeds and also dark chocolate I have read is good)
I take a lot lol... coq10, vitamin c, omega, vitamin e, b6, magnesium, calcium, b12, vit d, kelp, b complex, folate and zinc. I have always taken alot of vitamins but have increased to all of these the last few months because of the different ones that help egg quality in different ways.
How are you today? Sorry it's been such a headmelt for you this week... I really hope your not with me next cycle, would be lovely to have some hope, but if you are,we can chat about what you are trying. x

@CluelessInLondon I will def read it, thank you and I can imagine how worried you feel, making it to this stage is a big milestone and i have heard so many success stories i have lots of hope for you, I hope Saturday comes around fast, please let us know how you get on, I will be thinking about you. x

@Ladyinpink1 wow you're taking so many amazing vitamins, I went with CoQ10, folic acid and vit D 😂

I'm also ditching OPKs etc so will feel weird when we try next month but I find doing them quite stressful so seems counter intuitive. When's AF due for you? X

@NphysT have you tested again?? Hope it's good news!

@Wise0wl how was your day at work? Hope it went well.

@ThelastRolo20 ah thanks! It went well thank you, I’m totally exhausted now!

@Ladyinpink1 wow your vitamins are comprehensive! If this isn’t my month I think I might try something like this (not sure which brand or amount as I’ve not done all my research) https://www.amazon.co.uk/Free-Soul-Supplement-Myo-Inositol-Chromium/dp/B0BBR5WW47/

AF was possibly due today or tomorrow based on my last couple of cycles, but I’m also conscious I’ve tried hard with vitamins to lengthen my cycles a bit as post MMCs they have been short. I’m not sure what to do about testing, definitely not before mid-day tomorrow (but will ‘save’ my FMU - things I never thought I’d say, or that I’d keep cups of wee around the house but hey ho), but I’m also a bit scared of the result either way tbh.

@Wise0wl do you think you could wait until the day after just for more reassurance? Everything crossed AF doesn't show up tomorrow x

@ThelastRolo20 I could, that’s a good point! How are you doing? Getting ready for your holiday?

@Wise0wl I'm okay thank you, felt a bit off today though. I'm in full swing of AF and my friend mentioned she's starting mat leave early May (I was due late April) so it all felt rather rubbish.

4 weeks Friday we're off, slowly getting there x

@ThelastRolo20 reminders of the other life you might have been living are really hard, especially when your hormones are haywire mid-AF. I think you’ve done amazingly well to be so patient with pausing TTC, I’m really hoping that the break, holiday, vitamins you’ve been taking and letting your hair down with a few drinks stands you in good stead for when you start again ❤️

Yes, ordered some proper tests and got all positives. I feel strangely calm. I know it could lead to another mmc and when we get towards the 12 week I may not be quite so calm but I'm going to try and just take it 1 day at a time. I think we're going to pay for the nipt test this time too.

I used the nature's best myo-inositol powder as I read 4g is the best dose to have when ttc so just check the dosage matches. I also have pcos and it helped with regulating my cycle. Have you read it starts with an egg? I followed the recommended vitamins from there if you're thinking of starting any vitamins.

Got everything crossed that this is your month thougu and AF doesn't arrive 🤞🏻

@Wise0wl thank you ❤️ having this group has really helped as our stance to everyone in real life has been "we haven't decided whether to try again" so they have no clue as to this imaginary countdown! The due date is the weekend we come back from holiday so hoping have a week away will help make it more manageable.

What did you decide today? Have you tested?

@NphysT wonderful news 🥰 congratulations and fingers crossed all goes well

@ThelastRolo20 that must be hard. I have to admit I sort of underestimated MC before I had one, there are just so many misconceptions and I think a lot of people downplay/don’t understand the various challenges and triggers.

I peed in a cup this morning and am going to test it at lunchtime. I feel so rubbish with this flu bug thing that if I can I want to take some stronger medicines than honey and lemon and paracetamol! I will keep you posted.

@NphysT congratulations! And I’m so pleased you’re feeling calm ☺️

Hi everyone

@ThelastRolo20 it's so difficult isn't it when you come across a 'trigger'. My friend who we were in hospital together when we had our first babies, was in hospital having her 2nd baby when I had the surgical management. It really hurt and still does when she posts stuff about her baby. This break I'm on I should have been 12 weeks, but instead I'm packing opk's. Sending you much love.

@Wise0wl how are you feeling about the testing? I admire your ability to choose the right time to test, I feel totally compelled to test as soon as (or earlier) I possibly can. I saw someone ask once if they can get ptsd type symptoms from testing though, and I really think that is possible. Ttc carries such extreme feelings with it.

@Ladyinpink1 thank you haha. Yes it makes me feel like a scientist. I was joking with my other half about it being sexy getting a positive opk (haha no it definitely is not!).

@NphysT congratulations and I hope it all works out for you.

I am feeling a bit deflated. I got a positive/peak opk literally the night we got here, which moved ovulation to yesterday (thought it would be tomorrow). Was totally not ready for it and feel we've missed the boat on this one. Also I've been testing bbt and it's not risen today which is making me wonder if I've actually ovulated or not. Is it possible to get positive opk and not ovulate?? It's the first month testing bbt and obviously I'm sleeping in a different country, so could that affect it? I honestly don't know! Anyway, the boat has left now and nothing more I can do, but not feeling particularly positive about it. Just going to try and think of it as a month off (which we were advised to do anyway) and start again next month. I guess I was (not so secretly) hoping this month would work out so it would soften the blow of everything being moved back, but that was a very high bar to set. Also thought oh wouldn't it be so cute if we conceived in Paris. Wish I could turn off those stupid thoughts sometimes, but they come in before I've even realised what's happening.

Sorry for the long post!!

@NphysT Congratulations, that's wonderful news. ❤ Will you be able to access early scans through your EPU to check how things are going and help with reassurance?

@Wise0wl Fingers crossed for your test today!

@UrsulaSings123 The OPKs just measure the LH surge and it is possible to have that and not ovulate. It's really easy to end up putting pressure on yourself to conceive again right after an MC, and it's easy to fall into the trap of believing that it's what "should" happen because the internet is awash with stories of people catching on the first cycle after a loss. I waited a cycle to start trying again and was devastated at not falling pregnant on the first attempt - setting that expectation definitely didn't do me any good emotionally. If you can, try to relax for now and just enjoy your break. ❤