CD1 ttc after loss carry on thread #3

[Ladyinpink1]

I went to reply and you were right, the thread was full so I couldnt post a link to a new thread, also, because it's a new thread it wont give me a prediction to tag when I type a name, so I have just copied and paste the names off of everyone who posted on the very last page of the thread, I hope anyone else can find it OK. Sorry, maybe there is an easier better way... if anyone else can remember extra names and spellings, please tag 🙂

@samilicious

@Wise0wl

@ThelastRolo20

@13lucy

@Bugdem123

@HerbaceousPerennial

Hi everyone, I was wondering if I'd be able to join you? I had surgical management for a missed miscarriage last Thursday. I am TTC my second, my son is 3 1/2. I was so excited when I was pregnant as it felt everything was working out, the come down from that has been extremely difficult.

I am throwing myself into focusing on TTC even though its not been long at all. I am still testing v v faint positive on hcg, and my lh is raised but not positive, which is usually where it is about this time in a normal cycle (CD11). I'm wondering if I'm going to ovulate like normal or if the faint hcg levels are influencing the lh. We decided to TTC straight away without waiting as my partner is 51 so dont feel time is on our side. I hope we don't end up regretting that decision... if it all goes wrong I.e. I end up pregnant and miscarrying again then I think I would probably blame myself. Probably wishful thinking that I could be pregnant again so soon afterwards.

Hope all you ladies are OK. I saw someone mention the trigger warning for dune. Glad I saw that as am seeing it soon and it's obviously still very raw.

Hi all, please can I join too? I had a loss at 8 weeks in January and I think I am now finally ovulating? This is the first time tracking ovulation so I’m a bit clueless!

@UrsulaSings123 my dd is also 3 and a half and I felt the same after my MC in Jan. I was obsessed with trying again but ended up waiting for my period to come ts I could track ovulation. Sorry about your loss & I hope you get a bfp soon!

I hope you find something soon @moosey89 , that's a stress you don't need right now. x

@Bugdem123 exactly, it's going to be so wonderful when it happens. Well I wouldn't go as far as big, as lovely as that would be ha ha. They seem the same size to me, I think dh was trying to flatter me x

Welcome @UrsulaSings123 I'm so sorry for your loss and you are in good company with throwing everything into ttc on this thread, we have been trying all sorts of random things to get our next bfp. x

@Prettypennies I'm so sorry for your loss. That's great you are ovulating now, how are you tracking? x

@Bugdem123 they're great ones! It can feel a bit woo but there's quite a bit of psychology behind positive affirmations and it won't exactly hurt to do them!

@Ladyinpink1 ah well compliments are lovely but like you say we then obsess over it as a symptom 😂 can't win with us can they

@Prettypennies @UrsulaSings123 welcome both! It's a wonderful group here. I have a 2 year and I've had two back to back MMC in the last 6 months (the joys). I'm kick starting again from my April cycle which will start mid month so about a month's wait for me

@Ladyinpink1 Thursday testing it is! I actually have a counselling appointment first thing so might wee in a cup and have the appointment first, then test. Keen to separate how I’m processing my losses separately to the possibility of a new pregnancy. If not a positive sign, that’s a compliment from your DH! My spotting is a mystery, it’s gone for now but I’ve had so much spotting generally I struggle to work out what’s normal for me. Time will tell!

Lovely to hear from you @moosey89 and although your job situation sounds very stressful, some work trips sound like great opportunities to take your mind off TTC (though appreciate your frustration with ovulation!)

Welcome @Prettypennies and @UrsulaSings123, I’m so sorry for your losses. This group has been a real support to me, especially as you mentioned about planning ahead and feeling like things are working out. I really struggled to let go of the ‘other life’ that pregnancy gave me a window to, and accept that pregnancy loss was part of my life story. I hope you both have support IRL too.

Thank you so much for the welcome. It's always a bit difficult joining a thread that is already well established.

How long did you all take to get your period and ovulate (if you were tracking) after your loss? If you don't mind me asking. I have no idea what to expect.

@Prettypennies sorry to hear about your recent MC. I have also started tracking BBT so that has given me something else to obsess over. My son would have been just 4 when baby was due. I'm worrying about the age gap now but there is nothing I can do about it..

@Ladyinpink1 1 thank you. It sounds like I'm in good company! I have been making my partner have a handful of walnuts a day as I read they can help 😂

@ThelastRolo20 20 that sounds awful, I'm so sorry. What a roller coaster. Good luck for next month.

@Wise0wl 0wl thank you. I have been on a miscarriage thread and its been so helpful speaking with others in the same situation. There were 3 of us having surgical management on the same day and it helped me to feel less alone. Oh my goodness, that other life 😢hopefully it will be a reality one day for all of us. Good luck for Thurs and hope counselling goes OK

@UrsulaSings123 I’m TTC #2 with a 3 yr old (so recognise your worries about age gap). I had a MMC in July, and got pregnant again in September, and had a second MMC in December. Both times I waited for the month afterwards to allow my body time to heal for a cycle (still dtd when we wanted just not tracking ovulation etc), my period came back about 4 weeks after both times

@UrsulaSings123 @Prettypennies I'm sorry to hear about your losses - you are in good hands on this thread. I've been very lucky to have fallen pregnant again but am still dipping in here with the odd update and to keep an eye on how everyone is getting on, and it's really the most amazing source of support and kindness. The only bad thing about it is that it has to exist at all.

@UrsulaSings123 Thought I'd share my experience post-surgery with you - everyone's body responds differently but I remember finding it really helpful to read about what different people had experienced when I was waiting impatiently for everything to return to normal as it helped me not to panic so much that maybe things weren't going as they should. I had surgery in September for my MC, I got a negative pregnancy test 3 weeks later. I hadn't previously tracked ovulation but decided to track after the MC to have a better idea of what was going on, and I was already tracking while I waited for my negative test - my LH surge actually came the day after the negative pregnancy test, so things started to happen quickly after all of the HCG was out of my system. We decided to wait a cycle before starting TTC again, and my period then came back two weeks after my positive OPK, so just over 5 weeks after the surgery. Cycles returned to normal straight away after that, although in January when I conceived I randomly ovulated earlier than normal.

@moosey89 Good luck with the job situation, I have something similar going on at the moment so know how stressful it is. Glad your work trip felt like a nice break from the norm though.

@Wise0wl @Ladyinpink1 Good luck for the Thursday testing, I am keeping everything crossed that this is the cycle for both of you. ❤

@UrsulaSings123 my period also came back 4 weeks after each MC (one natural, one surgical) so things can get back to normal pretty quick but don't be concerned if it takes a bit longer, there's quite a breadth of experiences with this. It should be back within 8 weeks x

Hope you’re keeping well @CluelessInLondon and thank you ♥️

I hope it's a good sign for you @Wise0wl . That's good that your appointment is on Thursday, is this your first appointment with them? That's a good idea if you can manage to wait. I was prescribed steroids and antibiotics today from still having a cough from being sick the other week, so I was thinking I might test in the morning before I take the steroids. x

Yes I know @ThelastRolo20 fuel to the obsessing fire is the last thing we need lol x

@UrsulaSings123 I have the timings of ovulation etc written down, I will look them out and post it on here for you. Lol at the walnuts, we did brazil nuts for a few cycles, probably similar reasonings x

Thank you @CluelessInLondon how are things with you? x

Thanks everyone for sharing your experiences. It seems like it wouldnt be unusual to ovulate 2 weeks after then (I.e. this week) if people have had periods 4 weeks later. My cycle is usually pretty clockwork. My partner and I are going to Paris tomorrow for a few days. Was booked a while ago but couldn't have come at a better time so we can have a change of scenery and quality time together. I'm actually taking my bbt thermometer with me 😂but won't be taking my ovulation tests 😂so will carry on testing when we get back Fri evening. Hope you all have a good few days and good luck to those testing.

@Ladyinpink1 it’s our second appointment, I found the first really helpful at helping me accept the ugly feelings and since then have met a couple of the babies I would have been sharing a mat leave with had our first loss worked out. So some things to process! How are you feeling about testing tomorrow, and how many DPO would that make you? Fingers crossed!

I’m really under the weather and feeling pretty rubbish. I know also that if AF isn’t here in the next two days I should test, but part of me doesn’t want to. Can anyone relate? Like I desperately want to be pregnant but am so scared of that at the same time.

@UrsulaSings123 have a wonderful few days in Paris! And look forward to hearing whether you’ve had signs of ovulation when you’re back. You’re right, based on AF timings it seems possible ovulation could be soon.

@Wise0wl completely relate to the feeling of desperately wanting to be pregnant but terrified at the same time. I don't think I'd be able to cope with another miscarriage, especially finding out at the 12 week scan. Next time I worry I'll be going for scans constantly for reassurance but I really don't want to be like that.

@UrsulaSings123 first time I had a negative pregnancy test 8 days after the bleeding stopped, then a positive opk the day after (so 9 days after bleeding stopped), then my period 2 weeks after that.
Second time bleeding stopped then got my period 13 days later (but I had bled alot longer this time so I assume must of ovulated during that time but missed it.) Hope that helps x

@Wise0wl that's good that it's helpful for you, maybe I will look into talking to someone too. I hope your second appointment goes well.

Yes I know exactly what you mean, I want to be pregnant so badly but at the same time i'm petrified because i know that getting to that stage then puts me at a huge risk of going through the heartache all over again, it's a horrible feeling isn't it. I will be 9dpo tomorrow x

@Ladyinpink1 it has been really helpful, I would definitely recommend it! Fingers crossed for tomorrow, keep us posted?

Although I wouldn’t wish it on anyone else I so grateful for this group to not feel so alone in all this. @jellyfish2 how are you doing? I know what you mean about constant scans. I keep thinking maybe I’d have a viability one at like 7 weeks and then hold off until 10 (as I’ve not got to 10 weeks before with either of my MMCs) Otherwise could see me wanting them at least weekly!

@Wise0wl I'm glad yo hear that, hoping you get good news after.
Bfn for me this morning, I would normally get a bfp quite early so I am definitely out. Just trying to figure out what to do differently or try new next cycle x

@Ladyinpink1 sorry about the BFN, it's difficult when we've had positives early before but 9DPO definitely still gives you a chance so fingers crossed for you still

@Wise0wl I also can't decide re scans if we got pregnant again. On the one hand early scans means early intervention if it is bad news, on the other hand I'd quite like none at all - but as someone with two MMCs and no spotting that's probably a bad idea

Thank you hun @ThelastRolo20 I really examined the tests this morning (I use 2 dif cheap brands that i have had success with before each time) and there wasn't even a hint, sadly stark white so I don't feel any hope for this cycle now. I am really starting to worry this is because of my age, I turned 36 this month so maybe it's now too late, you have less eggs with time don't you and past 35 is kinda downhill lol. Sorry that's all a bit negative... onto the next cycle, going to research some new weird and wonderful things to try 😊 x

@ThelastRolo20 I'm the same about scans - both my MMCs had no symptoms, and I'd want another dealt with as fast as possible. There's one advantage to having multiple losses in that I would get scans from the EPU every 2 weeks for the first 12 so at least wouldn't have to pay for them!

@Ladyinpink1 sorry you're feeling so deflated. Like the others have said, 9dpo is still very early, but I understand you have had positives at this stage before. I was 35 a few months ago and my partner is 51 so I am worried about age too. Apparently there's more eggs with chromosome problems as you age and I wonder if that's why I had that miscarriage. I'm still hoping for you. Also thank you for the details about what happened after your miscarriages, helps to know ovulation can happen so soon.

I think if I get pregnant again I'd have a scan at 7 weeks, or even 8. This last time I had a scan at 6 weeks 3 days and it was too early and I ended up having to have 4 scans over 3 weeks before they confirmed a miscarriage. Those weeks waiting were worse than the actual confirmation itself and I never want to experience that limbo again.

We are leaving soon and I have packed the opk's 🤦‍♀️ I really am obsessed taking them on holiday with me!

@Ladyinpink1 I'm sorry - the stark whiteness is always so hard to see. I'm 35 in a few months so that's also on my mind. Let me know what weird and wonderful tips you come across! 😂

@moosey89 same - they said they'd scan me in the first 12 weeks, I'm thinking 7 and 10 weeks (7 in case 6 is too early and adds to worry, and 10 as that's when the first baby stopped growing). Emotional minefield

I've started my March cycle now, AF came 2 days early but that hopefully means it won't fall exactly on my holiday dates in April, worlds longest countdown continues...

@UrsulaSings123 definitely take the OPKs - we all know we would too 😂

@ThelastRolo20 haha thanks! Sorry to hear you've had AF. Like you say looking at the positives at least you won't have to deal with it on holiday.

These are my tests this morning. The OPKs are getting stronger but I don't see how I could ovulate if there's still hcg there... feeling quite confused.