2023 TTC 35+ Part 4

[VixFromThe6ix]

New thread, ladies!!!!

Hope you can all find it.

Feel free to tag others to continue the conversation.

Welcome @JustTrying1! 🤞you get good results from the tests!

@Twdfn123 if you end up going for the early scan, hope it all goes well for you! I know I would book in for sure, I love having any certainty or knowledge I can get…

Currently on Day 3DPO and going to really struggle for the next 7-10 days depending on how long I manage to hold out on testing. I’ve literally 0 patience and want to pee on a stick right now, and symptom spotting already even though I know it’s way too early for anything…

i am really really hoping that this month works out, and we don’t have to go to the fertility clinic at the end of the month, but let’s see…

P.S. I was like 20 mins late to work the other morning cos of my train mishap, but no one noticed tg! Thanks to those who asked 😅

Yeah I've booked it for when I'll be approx 7+6 🤞🤞 hopefully we'll see something, even just a viable pregnancy xxx

@Twdfn123 So either my first one, I called the GP at about 6 weeks. And got myself booked in for the first appointment with the midwife. I can't remember exactly when it was. But it felt like an eternity. I think it's sometime before 10 weeks.
Also because I was feeling very anxious, I booked a private ultrasound at 8 weeks.
Which I am so glad I did, because that is when I started bleeding and thought I was miscarrying.

Thank you for this 🤍 I've just booked mine now for when I'll be almost 8 weeks. I had to do a lrovate one with DS1 as we had a miscarriage before him so it's too long without just a bit of reassurance, as fleeting as it may be.

Welcome @JustTrying1 xx

i remember seeing a few other ladies post that they were also staying clear of OPKs this cycle but I’m sorry I can’t remember who..I just wondered how you were all getting on? I feel surprisingly chilled this cycle which is a first for me!! CD13 for me so we will see what the next few weeks bring 🤞🏻xx

@El1988 fingers crossed for you!!! 🤞🏻🤞🏻🤞🏻 and let us know how long you've been able to put off testing. I could never wait longer than 8dpo 😅

Thank you for the welcomes! 🫶

I can see some of you are in or heading to the TWW - same for me! When do you start testing? Im going to wait until AF is due this month (due by the Premom app anyway). It's my first proper cycle so trying to take the relaxed approach, borderline telling myself there's no hope this month. Testing the ol' reverse psychology!!

Completely agree about the comments on pressure. My DH said the same last night because I reached peak and he was shattered after work. I made it fun so he changed his mind, thankfully! 😆 Although I reached peak yesterday I feel like we should DTD again today and roles are reversed - I'm the shattered one! To work through it or hope that DTD on peak day was enough .... that is the question! 🫣

@VixFromThe6ix lets see how long I manage to hold out 🙈 I’m aiming for 10 DPO but it’s so hard 🙈😅

Around CD45 for me and got a peak OPK yesterday. Very late ovulation for me, I think the supplement that didn’t agree with me and/or getting glutened just as I was originally about to ovulate must have delayed things.
@El1988 @JustTrying1 I always plan to wait until AF is due, although often cave at 12dpo (day before). Tbh I may as well wait until AF I think I’m always symptom spotting so much between about 7-12 dpo I drive myself crazy. It’s silly because I only got a v late test with my first so probably wouldn’t get a positive until after AF missed anyway.

@CurlyWurly1991 logically I know it makes sense to wait until at least 12DPO, or until AF doesn’t arrive, but in reality I have no patience and hate uncertainty so…I waste money on pregnancy tests because I’ve decided clear blue non digital early tests are the best… 🙈🫣

CD45 is definitely long, have you been to the GP about the irregular cycles? (Sorry if I’m overstepping, or if this is something that has already been discussed)

probably tmi but I’ve just noticed some egg white CM and I’ll be back with DH tonight so I’m wondering have I read things all wrong and did I ovulate today and not on Tuesday… might try to BD tonight when I get in just to cover all eventualities… 👀

Welcome @JustTrying1 i don’t test unless my period is late and that has happened once in the last six months of trying (and it was negative). I’m not really sure how I resist testing but I genuinely don’t seem to have the same urge to do it as some others seem to (though I totally get why people do and this may well change for me as I go along my journey). It also helps that my husband and I agreed we would only test together as if I did get a positive he would want to be there (and I would want him there too) it really helps take away that urge and if I did have it I think he would help talk me round (whilst being super supportive of my decisions of course)!

I am currently 6/7dpo and went for my 21 day blood test. I have absolutely no idea what to expect from these tests as I’m still not clear as to what they are testing for but my GP is very good so I’m sure it will all become clear!! Only about a week or so to go until period is due and I’m super busy with work so hopefully it won’t be too bad!

Evening ladies. I think I am out. Well I am out this month. My HPT were negative after a faint + on 11DPO I started spotting afternoon 12DPO and tests negative since. Brown spitting 12DPO and still brown spotting.
It must have been a very early chemical.

I was not upset until LO who is 22 months old said baby and pointed to my tummy and then I asked LO is baby there and he said No. That upset me and I burst into tears he was so confused.

He started talking about Baby in my tummy from 8DPO. Which was bizzare.

But anyway. I want my period to start so I can start the process all over again.

@MrsBP15 honestly since coming off the pill back in June I've tested constant pretty much - just to get an idea of what my body was doing. I was in such limbo! But now I'm in an actual cycle that's actually made me feel calmer - strange I know!

I think once my initial bloods are out of the way the 21 day bloods will be next on the agenda. Because my folate levels were low I'm on folic acid tablets for 3 months (2 months left).

We've also already got a plan in mind (although like everything that plan is subject to change). We've said we will keep trying naturally, go through IVF (once I've lost some more weight) and if that doesn't happen (I hate saying fails), then we will look at adoption. I think having this plan is actually helping me because we are doing what we can and trying to stay more relaxed... but that is very hard at times!

I think my biggest worry is my weight to be honest. Looking at me (I'm told) I don't look as big as what the scales say. We are eating healthy but I can't do too much strenuous exercise because of my skin condition - so I think weight will be my biggest barrier 😩

I am so sorry @MixedCouple . That must have been incredibly difficult x

I’m 3DPO too - let’s try and hold out on the tests together!

@JustTrying1 i was the same this month. We DTD the day before I got my peak, so then had to DTD the day of my peak. So then the day after that we both didn’t want 3 days in a row 😂plus it was during that heatwave (which already feels like a lifetime ago!)

I’ve got a question, I’ve heard for us 35+ people it’s recommended to go to GP after 6 months of TTC, is this correct? Is it just a case of trying to get an appointment with GP and saying that? Also wondering if anyone’s paid private for initial fertility tests? Just thinking ahead, I’m only on cycle 3 but like to know what we should be doing and won’t want to delay any potential NHS waiting times at our age.

@Twdfn123 in my opinion 8 weeks is perfect timing for a scan and good to have it booked in advance. There should definitely be a heart beat so you will have all the reassurance about viability. I think once heartbeat there at 8 weeks too the miscarriage rate drops to something like 1-2% so that’s good 👍🏻 xx

@EvelynKatie I'll be honest I don't want to push DH into DTD tonight. For one, im tired myself but also I don't want to come over all pressurising otherwise we risk making it a chore!

That's true I believe in the 6 month timescale. I was previously told that as I have a new partner it would be another year of trying before doing anything however when I went to the GP about something else a month or so back I mentioned that we were TTC. He saw my history with TTC previously with my ex and instantly put us both in for blood tests and DH has his swimmers test in November - I didn't expect any of that, not so quickly!

Yep
Used hertility health
4 private hormone and fertility tests
Very worth it

150 gbp

Results were gd
Added them to my nhs record

I lied and said I'd been trying 6 months to see what they'd say... basically IIRC they can test for a hormone which indicates whether you can ovulate but they won't test quality/number of eggs etc. And it's no better indicator than the OPKs. They've advised DH to submit sperm for analysis. The nurse I spoke to said she'd been struggling to conceive for 6 years and wish she'd gone private from the outset. She also advised that there's a backlog due to Covid. Super helpful 🤷🏼‍♀️

Also - if any of u have heavy irregular periods - ask 4 a transvaginal scan on nhs

Then stuff gets checked
Including if you have fibroids found etc

Are you taking coq10 ?
Helps egg quality in over 35s

Highly recommend the book - it starts with an egg

Have u had vit d - feretin and b12 checked?
All important

@El1988 yes my cycles are irregular, I have been to the GP several times over past few years had loads of checks including TV scans, etc. All normal.
Went recently and said we had been trying 5 months and also about irregular cycles again and like @MrsBP15 will be getting the day 21 progesterone tests. I’m also doing a day 2 hormone test.
GP advised a test like AMH privately but my understanding is this is most useful in relation to IVF not natural
conception, anyone know?
we don’t have much cash to spare.
Depending on results of my blood tests we may then order a sperm analysis for DH.
I’ve been seeing a medical herbalist for several months who has been great and the herbs I take have regulated my cycles a lot as well as other benefits. I do still have wacky cycles but have had several 27 day ones as well and my luteal phase has increased. A major component of the herbal mix is agnus castus / Vitex which is known to decrease prolactin and increase progesterone.

That’s helpful. Me and DH briefly discussed before and he said we might as well go private for the fertility tests so at least they cover more and we might get better answers quicker - it’s so tough to get GP appointments these days and we’re both registered at separate surgeries.