Anyone else TTC after TFMR?

[Downtherabbithole83]

Anyone else on here in the same situation? Would be nice to chat to others who understand.

@Downtherabbithole83 - I've been sick from the very start with all 3 of my pregnancies. I definitely struggled with the same-ness of the post-TFMR pregnancy and the one that followed, but things like the sickness are just pregnancy things, not necessarily specific to what went awry with the one that you lost. It sounds like a good sign that it is not chemical. On a sort of wider note, I found the sameness of the pregnancy experience really tough, but when I passed the 18 week mark, where I lost my little one, it was like walking out of a forest and into a field. I was no longer under the dark shadow of that experience. It was not totally worry free, but it certainly helped. I know that will be a long time away for you if you are 6 weeks now and probably lost your earlier baby in the late-teens, but I hope you find similar comfort. Best of luck in your scan.

@oneweecraw - my warmest congratulations! I really hope it is a sticky bean, and I am excited by your excitement for it. I hope your optimism can carry you through, as indeed it should as worry just steals today's joy.

Ah ladies… you’re all lovely! Thanks so much for the reassurance. Setting up this group was the best thing I did after tfmr - our own little community ❤️

@Downtherabbithole83 Hope all is well with your scan this afternoon.

@oneweecraw thats wonderful news. Fingers crossed for a sticky bean.

I’m still very early on after TFMR (June 2024) but have got my first period out of the way and I’m feeling hopeful for the future. Something that I didn’t think possible at that horrible time. This group gives me hope and strength to keep going. Especially when seeing lovely successful future pregnancies, it’s so lovely that we have a little group to be able to support each other. Its hard to find people who can truly empathise.

I’m not ready to try again yet but I can imagine how amazing it must feel to see a BFP but also how scary it is at the same time

@oneweecraw congratulations, such lovely news to read ❤️

@Downtherabbithole83 just want to say thank you for creating this group. Seeing people post months, years down the line, and seeing positive test results all gives me so much hope for our future as hard as it is to be in it right now ❤️

Congratulations @oneweecraw ! Lovely lovely news.

@Downtherabbithole83 this pregnancy has been completely different to my TFMR. I had lots of sickness with my TFMR pregnancy and exhaustion and very little with this one. HOWEVER, my TFMR pregnancy symptoms were the same as my symptoms with my son who is now 2.5yrs old and completely healthy. The baby I am currently pregnant with is a girl, so personally I feel it has more to do with gender. As others have said, symptoms are generally indicative of good hormone levels and a healthy pregnancy, the issues we have all faced previously are rare.

Ah don’t say that @Gingerk1tty - my other half is already panicking that it might be another girls (I’ve got 2, he’s got 1 and our tfmr baby was also a little girls). I had already mentioned to him that maybe the similarity in symptoms was because it was another girl but he has said he refuses to believe that! 😂

Just home from the scan and baby is there, in the right place and has a little heart beat! Very tiny at the moment and being estimated as around 5.5/6 weeks (my dates give me 6 weeks today so that seems about right). Got another scan in just over 2 weeks.

Really been struggling this weekend with my anxiety, am 19w today and have got just over a week to wait until my 20w anomaly scan. Have started to feel movements which on the one hand is exciting, but on the other is something I worry I might get fixated on (as in the lack of them) and I’m already catastrophising about something being wrong at the scan.

Hey @Rumbleinthecrumble sorry to hear you’ve been struggling this week I can only imagine the lead up to the 20 week scan is a scary blooming time! Try and remember new pregnancy new scans and most of the time these scans are uneventful and praying yours is exactly the same!
interesting what you say about the movements this is something that’s been in my head aswell and I mentioned to my midwife I’m only 10 weeks but I know I’m going to get fixated on them - I think there are some apps out there you can use to help? It is worth mentioning to your midwife so they can provide some reassurance to you or even advise what to look out for! Pregnancy after loss is tough going you are not alone but I am hopeful your scan goes really well and you can update us - try keep yourself and your mind busy over the next days and tell yourself the majority of pregnancies go well I will be one of them!!

Hey @Rumbleinthecrumble - sorry to hear your anxiety has been so hardcore. Totally understandable for where you're at, I imagine mine will be the same if I hopefully get to that point 🤞🏻 I had loads of movement with my TFMR, felt them so much earlier and more frequently, and every scan we had they were moving like crazy. More than any pregnancy before. So I wouldn't put movement/lack off down to much. Your brain is trying to protect you by preparing for the worst case scenario, but you've made it this far. Not long to go until you can relax and hopefully start enjoying pregnancy a bit more - I have everything crossed for you, not that you need it

@Downtherabbithole83 how are you getting on? Lovely news about your scan. I was a few days behind on my 6w scan and jumped almost a week at my 9w one (private, and I suspect with slightly newer equipment)

Hello everyone

delighted to hear your news @oneweecraw, hope you are still doing ok.

@Rumbleinthecrumble how are you now? When is your scan? I felt very anxious during the scan, and even though the doctor said the baby was ‘in all likelihood normal’, I didn’t feel the rush of relief I hoped for. I think this is entirely normal when you’ve been through what we have.

@Downtherabbithole83 hope you are feeling a wee bit better after your scan. It’s so hard, comparing everything. I had an amazing tfmr pregnancy right up to the 12 week scan where we got the bad news. Even went on a foreign business trip etc. Ours was for T18 and low HCG is an indicator of that so I surmised that’s why my symptoms were low. This time I felt a lot more, couldn’t even open the fridge between 7-9 weeks! Funnily enough it was a girl last time and a boy this time.

Are you going to be offered a nipt this time? I thing I was holding my breath until the results of that, but I tried so hard to rationalise that it was highly unlikely to happen again and it was just bad luck.

Morning everyone! So pleased to hear about your scan @Downtherabbithole83 - such a positive first milestone.

Hang in there @Rumbleinthecrumble you will get through that scan. Where I am after 20 weeks you can pretty much go in for monitoring whenever you need reassurance so do use the services you have :) Hope that’s the case where you are..

Wanted to let you all know my baby boy arrived 3 weeks early last Thursday. I can’t believe he’s here 🩵 Nothing will ever replace the baby boy we lost last year or make up for the pain we went through, but I’m so grateful for what we have now 🙏🏼

Congratulations @Thornberry1 and I hope you are loving every moment of the newborn baby bubble, even the very tired bits! I’ll enquire about additional scans when I go in next week. Just trying to power through and keep occupied.

Congratulations @Thornberry1 - such wonderful news.

Thanks everyone for the messages: I’m muddling through over here but the all day nausea and regular vomiting is pretty hideous at the moment!

Wonderful news, @Thornberry1 ! Thanks for sharing and I hope you find this time with your little one very joyful.

Huge congratulations @Thornberry1 🩷🩷🩷

Congratulations @Thornberry1! Hope your keeping well! 🥰💙

Huge congratulations @Thornberry1 enjoy every single second with your little boy.

I’m struggling at the moment. It was my little boy’s funeral earlier this week and it’s hit me like a tonne of bricks all over again. Grief is a horrible thing, you think you’re ok and then it washes over you again like a tidal wave and knocks you back off your feet. I’m just over 6 weeks post TFMR now. I’m also having what appears to be my 2nd period. The last cycle only lasted 17 days and I’m not convinced I ovulated. Just another sh*tyy thing to add to the mix. Hoping that my body settles back into a rhythm soon

NIPT tests: how long did you have to wait for results? I had my sample done and sent off on Monday morning first thing. They said "about a week" but really hoping I hear back before the weekend 😟 felt ok all week but the closer it gets to the end of the week the more anxious I feel and the more I'm doubting every little thing in this apparently healthy so far pregnancy

@Fullofconfusion hope things settle down for you physically soon ♥️

Hello ladies, we are TTC after TFMR
I'm glad to find this discussion because perinatal grief is extremely taboo and only parents who have lived through it really understand it.

I had my test on a Monday and heard back on the Thursday afternoon.

Hey ladies,
Just wondered if anyone could help me, either if they have experienced something similar or some advice.

So pre TFMR I would get a hormonal headache 1-2 days before my period arrived. Spoke to the GP about it who said it was the drop in hormones just before your period, which made sense as I would have the same headache when I had my week break from the pill.

Now after TFMR I am still getting the same hormonal headache in the couple of days leading up to my period. But the last two cycles I also had the same headache 9 days before my period (6 days after ovulation), and 8 days before my period (7 days after ovulation). So I’m a bit concerned that my hormones are dropping in the middle of my luteal phase and that could be impacting our TTC?

I’ve rang my GP today and they were incredibly dismissive basically laughed me off the phone and said it’s “normal PMS” but it’s absolutely not normal for me and no matter how many times I stressed that they had the same response.

I don’t really know where to go now to get the answers I need? Or if there’s a hormonal pattern at this point of your luteal phase that could explain the headaches?

Lost!

@jt130593 it took me a really long time to regulate my hormones and honestly the only thing that helped was following the vitamin protocol and lifestyle stuff in It Starts With An Egg. All my tests and scans with GP came back normal but I didn't feel hormonally balanced in the way I was before with bleeding on/off I'd never had before. Passing of time improved things but those book changes really spend things up and got me right again

In other news... got my NIPT results back 4 works days after my sample (was done first thing Monday morning) to answer my previous question in case anyone else is waiting

We might TTC again and I am a massive bag of nerves. TMFR due to nearly dying with HG and my organs started to shut down with catching covid.

We have plans in place and spoken to lots of consultants but the real TTC is freaking me out. What if it’s not meant to be, what if we should just stick with the present DC? I feel like my heads go go go go then I have moments of terror.

Ive had lots of counciling and time, any suggestions on being less scared?

@samilicious I’ve been following the supplement plan in that book since April. What prenatal do you use? As the one I have the vitamin b doses are so high, and the it starts with the egg book says that can cause side effects which I have but struggle to find a prenatal that doesn’t have massively high vitamin b levels!