Entering into 8th cycle..

[Indianna2006]

Entering into 8th cycle…ttc number 2.

Feeling defeated and deflated even though I know odds are still on our side really..
I already have a DD who is 3 years 9 months so very much feel time is of the essence. Just desperate for it to happen now.

Feel like either people seem to fall super fast or seem like 12 months plus and don’t find many “in the middle” types.

Ive fallen pregnant 1st cycle before. And then DD took 7 cycles. So hence why this failed 7th cycle seems like a miserable milestone!

Anyone welcome to keep me company. Sucks 😫

Happy to keep company - I am also TTC # 2, just entered cycle 5. Feeling a little more positive today on CD3, after the inevitable slump I feel when AF arrives again. DD was conceived cycle 1 so I entered into it naively.

I'm planning to start taking more supplements (for me and DH) and try to enter this cycle more relaxed (if possible...). I was SO stressed last cycle about DTD on the right days it just became a chore and v unenjoyable for both!

@Indianna2006 yesss right here with you. Trying for number 1 - this is cycle 7 and you’re right, it feels like it either happens in the first few months or more towards a year. There is another 9+ group with lots of active chatter on it. Urgh, such a mentally draining journey.

@ok92 the slump on AF day and the few days after is that worse! The next cycle and potential BFP seems so long away doesn’t it!
I’ve upped my vitamins for this cycle as well. So fingers crossed!

@FlyOnTheWall89 it is so mentally draining. The excitement evaporates and you almost don’t want to imagine it. My journey to my DD wasn’t easy but keep going. Like my DH says. Each month could be “THE” month. Just nice to moan with people who get it.
Really hoping I fall within the next 2/3 cycles.

@thebloodycatwontstopmeowing it’s so hard when it’s been easy ttc before and then it isn’t. But that’s happened for lots of my friends second time round. None of my journeys have been easy. It’s such a slog.
Even if we have dcs like you said the want doesn’t go away. I’m desperate for a second.

Hi, I am in the same boat. AF showed today so I am not onto cycle 12 ttc #2 and I am so deflated and upset. I don’t know what I am doing wrong 😫

@thebloodycatwontstopmeowing I know exactly what you mean. I try and “forget” about it but it’s literally all I can think about. I don’t want to be forceful and start paying for expensive treatment when I don’t need to but I also don’t want to just hang around and hope for the best 😞

@thebloodycatwontstopmeowing no we just said we would see what happens and next minute I was pregnant (didn’t realise how annoying that sounds until now) but I feel like I would break down in tears if someone said that to me now! I have been much more anxious ttc this time even in month 1

Hi, can I join you?
I am also TTC#2. I am 14DPO and thought I had every symptom under the sun but tested this afternoon and it was a BFN so I’m feeling so sad right now. It was only the second cycle trying so will be entering the third soon, but our DS was conceived first cycle so I went into this naively thinking it would happen straight away again. I’m 31 so I suppose time is on my side but DS is 2 years and 8 months and I didn’t want a huge age gap. We would have tried over a year ago but our wedding was postponed to this year due to covid. I hate anything that’s out of my control and I’m scared that it’ll never happen for us or it’ll take months. I agree that it seems to take people either 1 or 2 months or 12 months+!
I’m wondering whether to try and relax a bit more this next month instead of tracking with OPKs and charting because this cycle I was finding it very mentally draining and sex felt like a chore but then I don’t want to lessen my chances of conceiving even more :(

@Moonshine160 it is still incredibly early days for you.

@Hopefullywaiting01234 i feel the same but ultimately we cannot be doing anything wrong. It just seems like a really split experience which I hadn’t appreciated before. To not experience this constant disappointment every month. To not experience the worry of thinking maybe you’ll never be able to conceive naturally because if it’s not happened in the last 8 months of constant shagging, how will more months help? It’s unreal. I tested today at around 12DPO to manage my expectations so I’m not so witchy when AF does show. It was a stark white BFN. Feeling LOW. Onto the next cycle.

So sorry to hear you ladies are all feeling so similar. Wish I had the magic pill for you all.

@thebloodycatwontstopmeowing yeh trying not to put timelines and obssess over some thing seems impossible. I say don’t do the timelines. But I still do. It’s past the timeline I wanted. Due to lots of factors for me. And it’s just like sigh. Have to think does the age gap matter. Not not really. That want for that second child is more important. We will just keep going for now.
I know you’re almost 35 but you still have time. Some people don’t even start their families until 35. You have fallen and ill keep my fingers crossed it happens again soon for you!

@FlyOnTheWall89 ah sorry hun. My 12dpo test yesterday was stark white too. And hence why AF was due today but she’s being annoying and taking her time even though I know she’s coming. Eugh just get on with it!
Hugs for feeling low. It’s SO hard to think how will any month be different. But I remember feeling like that with DD which took 7/8 months ttc after a miscarriage at 13 weeks. And it was hell. Pure hell. And I passed the due date of the first baby as I thought I’ll be pregnant by then and I wasn’t. And it was soul destroying. And funnily enough I let go of that time frame and next cycle..BFP and along came DD.

Very easy to say.I know. Because I can’t get my time line out of my head. And I basically at my max timeline I imagined for an age gap. But hey maybe once that timeline passes I shall let go of it almost and let nature takes it course 🤷🏻‍♀️

Any month can be THE month. We got this!

I would go as far as saying these past 10 months have been the most stressful of my life; I genuinely never appreciated how depressing the full ttc carry on is. I keep thinking to myself hopefully one day I will look back and this will all be a distant memory! I’m 34 also so I feel that time is not on my side although everyone I know at 33/34 is currently pregnant a lot with number 1 so again I try tell myself I am not that old in the ttc world x

@Hopefullywaiting01234 ye I am nearly 33 - most I know have 18 month olds now so just waiting for the next round of announcements. It is so stressful and so all consuming. I don’t even think it’s the desperation of wanting one right now… it’s the worry that we won’t ever be able to have the babies we wish. It’s the unknown when it’s baby number 1. It could just not happen! It honestly feels like that now. If it does become a distant memory, I will always remember how bloody difficult it is and at least I will always be able to empathise with others in this situation.

Thanks @Indianna2006. That must have been so so hard. That is another hurdle I cannot think about that happens so frequently. I think I feel a bit more okay again once I’m back on a new cycle - we just go AGAIN. Sending hugs to you too xxx

Also TTC #2 and finding it so much more stressful this time around. It took us 13 months to conceive my DS so I know to be in for a wait but it seems harder this time around, I think because I had two chemicals in quick succession then nothing since. So I know I can get pregnant but for some reason it seems to have stopped happening. Cycle number 5 at the mo so nothing compared to some people but just feels mentally more difficult this time around.

@FlyOnTheWall89 I completely agree with remembering this feeling. Never will I (although I never did before) give any sort of advice or ask if they are having another. My husband said even other men in his work say “is it not time for
another” you feel like screaming “we are trying” at them

@Charl881 - i know what you mean, I have been stressed since month 1 my mum keeps telling me stress is the worst thing when ttc but there doesn’t seem to be any accurate data on this. I sometimes wish this was true and there would be some explanation as to why I’m not pregnant

Hi all,

Can I join? I am also TTC #2 (DD is 3 years 8 months) and on Cycle 5 (4DPO). Time is massively against me (I'm 43 and was 39 when DD was born), but loosing hope now because of my age!

Want this so much (DH didn't want a second and then randomly changed his mind 6 months ago, doh)!!

Sprinkling lots of baby dust for you all! Fingers crossed! xx

Hey all,
Joining if ok I know the feeling it really disheartening each month of bfn & as the months roll on
We are ttc baby #2 onto cycle 9 now
Our dd just turned 3 just so much pressure from family asking all the time too

Wishing us all Christmas miracles of bfp's 🌟👼

All the nosey Parker’s - have they no clue that, despite what we are told at school, making a baby isn’t always a one hit wonder!!!! I am pretty sure I’ll be asked about it when I’m with my family at Christmas but my mother took 3 years to make me and did so after taking clomid so I think she will be delicate about it.

@FlyOnTheWall89
Completely agree with you really isn't as easy as people make it seem.
Lucky you have your mother that will understand

@StaryEyes1978 - welcome, I know how you feel m, my DS is 5. I am not too bothered about the age gap as he has close family and friends his age but I am more upset that he will never get a sibling. My mum just keeps telling me to stop thinking about it for a while enjoy life and if it happens it happens but I cannot get it out my head.