Faith, trust & baby dust! ✨💕✨ TTC 12 months + 🤞🏼 On this rollercoaster together with a little love, support and giggles to get us by! 💕

[HopefulGlow]

Hi all!

We were getting to the end of the previous thread, so thought it’s best to start a new one.

A quick catch up I think mainly everyone on the old thread is as 12 months + TTC.

Newbies are always welcome.

Just sharing our journeys, supporting each other when possible, and having somewhere to moan and let it all out

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@xoJellyBean thank you ❤️ I feel the same about about birth announcements.. once I've gotten over the 'sting' of the initial announcement I tend to put it out of my mind that there will be an actual baby coming. I often think 'as long as im pregnant by the time their baby is here!'.. which just adds to the disappointment. It's a horrible feeling as it's such a joyous occasion, but we can't help our emotions ❤️.

@amy259 I can see your point too, about wanting to put it all behind you and not letting the struggle taint your future.. I feel like that too, that I just hope I can get pregnant and put all of this behind me but honestly I feel like this journey is part of me now.. I think if I were to announce online I would acknowledge that it's not been an easy ride, I think that has been something that's helped me , when I've seen announcements that have a nod to couples who are struggling. So yeah I think the acknowledgment from my friend would have gone a long way but your right that I can't expect others to manage my emotions, I think I'm just upset that she's pregnant and I'm not, which isn't fair to put on her really.

Thanks @HopefulGlow, don't worry at all about upsetting me, I am asking for your opinions and so I am welcome of them 🥰. As I said above to @Amy259, if I'm being honest with myself, I'm just upset that she's pregnant and I'm not, which isn't fair of me to put my expectations on her.

How is everyone's weekend going? I was planning on putting up my Christmas tree up today but AF arrived so I've just been feeling sorry for myself really 😭. Had a cry and a cuddle with OH, we DTD 7 days in a row this month (which is unheard of for us!) so it just feels even more disappointing.. and we're out for a Christmas BFP 😣. Xxx

@AZ1992X ahh that’s rubbish that you need to wait until 16th Dec, but hopefully he’s just as helpful this time.

That’s such a tough call, I think I’d feel super similar - I’d worry about regretting not trying but then a month without a tww would maybe be a welcome break? Hopefully you’ll feel yourself leaning towards one side the closer to ovulation you get?

The tablets have definitely taken the edge off, thank you!

@HopefulGlow brilliant news about the SA, and excellent timing that the no sex falls when it doesn’t count anyway 😂 good luck to your OH with the whole experience haha!

I’m glad you have a busy weekend to keep you distracted, but I’m staying hopeful that af stays well away for you 🤞🏻♥️

@User1400 I agree about liking the ones that put a wee nod to struggles, I’m just not sure what to say that’s short and sweet and not too much? With your friend, I think most people would definitely feel hurt that she didn’t pre-warn. She must’ve just not been thinking, I’m sure she didn’t mean to add to your pain but it’s rubbishy ♥️
Aw I’m so sorry, cuddles with OH and a good cry sounds like a great plan. Maybe you’ll feel a bit more Christmassy in the morning and have a tree day! That’s next weekend for us I think, my DH is determined we wait until December haha xxx

Hey everyone, hope you are all doing well!

Haven't checked this thread recently as to be honest I've just been so busy. Work is mental at the moment and im stressed as hell but I won't be trying again for another 3 weeks anyway so not worried about it. Also I've recently discovered from the BFN podcast that unless stress is making you have sex less then there's little to no evidence that it actually affects fertility - hearing that instantly made me feel a bit more relaxed because I have a pretty stressful job/life in general.

@HopefulGlow great news about the SA! Where are you based again that seems so quick. OH has been waiting since August now to try and get his.

@User1400, I kind of feel the same and I don't think I will post anything online. I've actually not posted anything online in over a year anyway, I try to stay away from socials as much as possible as it really doesn't do much good for my mental health. I think your friend could have given you a warning if she knows what you are going through and I think your feelings are valid.

Morning ladies,

Hope everyone’s doing ok and had a nice weekend?

I went out with family for a few drinks and an Indian. Haven’t had a drink in months and I think it was much needed!

@HopefulGlow How are you doing?

Also great news on the SA, it’s great you haven’t had to wait long for that.

Yes, I managed to get an appointment but it’s not till mid December. That seems forever away now but sure it will come around pretty quick.

@Amy259 I’m glad the tablets have helped a little. ❤️

I think I’m leaning towards trying this cycle, OH is keen too, trying to not put much pressure on it - the less stress the better.

@User1400 I’m sorry AF arrived for you, I feel it’s even harder the cycles where there was nothing more you could do. Hope you’re taking some time for yourself ❤️

@LA9610 It’s nice to hear from you but sorry to hear work is pretty stressful. I hope you’re taking some time still at weekends to relax/unwind?

Morning all!

I’ve had a great weekend really, lovely time spent with family. AF came early on Saturday afternoon and it just broke me. I managed to keep it together at my family do, then spent all night crying.

I’m just fed up, broken and useless. Then I get angry at myself for feeling like that. I get more annoyed for being upset that my OH never had this problem before, so I must be the problem. Then I get even angrier that they didn’t even plan or try for their 2 babies and were blessed with them!! I know it’s not his fault and he can’t help it, but it still makes me angry and bitter I suppose.

He’s been so supportive and positive and wants me to be the same. He’s convinced it will happen, he’s convinced we will be pregnant at some point in the future and I just feel miserable for doubting it and never feeling like it’s going to happen. I don’t know if I need to speak to someone about it, because it’s not his fault he’s got DC but it honestly hurts sometimes. I feel broken and there must be something wrong with me, because he’s done it before. 😩

Gosh, sorry for the absolute miserable rant on a Tuesday morning. I’m just going to try hard to try and be positive, and imagine it happening. But I don’t want to let myself get my hopes up, just to be shattered again. But I’m a massive believer in your mind being a powerful thing?! So how the hell do we balance this all ladies?!

To top it all off, his doctor got the wrong end of the stick, the next SA is in March!!! 🤦🏼‍♀️ they didn’t realise the wait was so long 🙄 so it sounds about right, I did think only a week was way to quickly!

Anyway, enough of me being miserable and bringing you all down.

How is everyone? Sorry I just dipped out for the weekend. I was trying so hard to figure my head out and try it I work out a way I can move forward.

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Hello ladies. Wee update from me, my scans have shown up at tumour on my womb unfortunately. More tests to follow next week but I've been advised to stop TTC as it's too risky 💔💔

Hi @HopefulGlow,

Glad you had a lovely weekend with family but so sorry AF showed up.

Im glad your OH has been very supportive of you and positive - he sounds great.

I know how hard it can be to try and remain positive when it’s all that you want and think about and with each cycle it just gets harder. If you feel talking to someone would be good for your health then absolutely reach out. There’s nothing bad that can come from asking for help ❤️, Also know we’re always here too.

I agree and think that mindset does play a part - when I felt/feel like that I kept thinking of this group and how many people went on to get got their bfp even after trying for so long so try and cling onto that.

Sorry that the GP got it wrong about the SA, very annoying especially when you thought it would be coming imminently.

P.s please don’t apologise for the rant - always happy to listen. ❤️

@xoJellyBean I’m so sorry to hear that and you’ve been asked to stop TTC.

I’m keeping my fingers crossed you get some answers and discussions around next steps after your tests next week.

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@xoJellyBean oh my goodness I’m so sorry! How are you feeling?? Did they say what they will do?

I’m really hoping they can safely remove the tumor and you can continue TTC when you’ve healed. Your head must be all over the place right now. Sending lots of positivity 💕

@AZ1992X thank you! I just feel so negative and I’m usually such a positive person. I just don’t want to get too positive about a BFP just to be disappointed again when AF comes. It gets tiring doesn’t it!

My OH says will it matter about our journey when we finally get there? And I know he’s right, but I know it will make us more thankful to have what we’ve been fighting for for so long 🥰 I will never forget this journey!!

How are you doing this week? Are you feeling any more festive? Our decorations are going up on Saturday and I’m just about to wash all of our Christmas clothes haha so I’m trying to get that festive cheer brewing 😂🎅🏼🎄🎉

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@HopefulGlow Your absolutely right, it will make it that more special knowing what we’ve been through to get there and you’re right I don’t think we’ll ever forget our journey. ❤️

I’m doing ok thank you, I’ve got a long weekend off work starting today and plan on putting the tree up and going Christmas shopping.

Glad you’re getting in the Christmas spirit too 🎄⛄️

Xx.

@xoJellyBean I'm so sorry to hear! Hope you are holding up ok. I suppose it's good they caught it now and hope they can safely treat it and you can TTC soon. Lots of hugs to you xx

Hello! Please can I join? Trying to conceive for 21 months now. Two miscarriages, one in January 2021 and another in the September just gone. Both were pregnancies of an unknown location and I miscarried them naturally, haven't been given any info on the cause...Just the usual "it's bad luck, 1 out of 4. Blah blah blah"

Losing all hope I'll ever be able to carry a baby especially with how difficult it seems to get pregnant in the first place.

Really thought this might be my month as I've been experiencing all sorts of weird symptoms but I'm 11DPO and BFPs so far. Just think I'm getting obsessed and would love to know how you all deal with the pressure?!

X

Sorry...meant BFN...wish they'd been BFPs 😫😫

Welcome @Littlebun1,

Of course, you’re more than welcome but I’m sorry that your in this position too. 💔 Everyone on here has been super supportive so you’ve joined a good group!

I can relate somewhat I had a MC in May this year and just had a chemical the cycle just gone - been trying for over 16 months.

I’ve had my ups and downs over the last year but have seen and know of so many success stories of people who have been trying for so long or even after multiple miscarriages go on to have a baby and that keeps me going that our time will come but it’s just taking longer than we wanted ❤️

Have you had any conversations with your GP and asked for any tests etc? Xx.

@AZ1992X I’m currently sat in my Christmas pyjamas, with Christmas music on, eating my oat pancakes haha I’m definitely trying to get in the Christmas spirit. I’m hoping everything starts to get better now I had my mini meltdown 😂

Did you put your decorations up? We put our tree up last night but nothing else just because we will have to pack it up again to move!

Welcome @Littlebun1 I love your name, I’m bunny obsessed haha

So sorry you’re on this journey with us. There are a couple of ladies on here who have experienced miscarriages and chemicals, so I know they will be supportive too. I can’t even imagine going through that. So I’m so sorry that you had to experience it.

Just like AZ said, have you had any tests yet?

As for tips on dealing with the pressure?….gosh I have no clue. For me it comes in waves. My partner is really positive and is adamant it will happen for us. Which is lovely and he keeps me sane but I’m used to being very positive, and I’m not with TTC. I’m feeling useless, broken and fed up! Which is annoying because if any of you said the same, I would shout and say “no! You’re not broken and useless, you can’t help this journey and you are doing all you can” but it doesn’t sink in to myself.

I’m on cycle 17/18 now and I had a little breakdown on my period just gone, I think it just got to me again and I couldn’t cope. BUT I managed to pull myself together, start the counselling/therapy process and I’ve really tried to change the language I use around TTC.

Before I used to he really negative, like if it ever happens or when I stop failing…and so on. Now I try to do what my OH does and say when it happens and when we get our little baby. I know it’s only small, but maybe the language I use will help me cope? 🤷🏼‍♀️

Have you shared your journey with your family or friends?

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Hi @HopefulGlow and @AZ1992X thanks so much for taking the time to respond 💕 both your replies really helped me feel like I'm not alone in all of this and I'm so sorry you're both going through your struggles too! I do have my family and friends support but all of them have become pregnant in their first or second cycle or haven't even started trying yet so nobody really understands what I'm going through, even though I know they try their best to say positive things.

I've had all the usual tests done except for a laparoscopy as I fell pregnant just before my consultant was about to book me in. After I miscarried a second time he told me there's no point having it done as I can clearly get pregnant now 🙄 I've taken it upon myself to take an aspirin a day now and hopefully that's going to help. I go to acupuncture and my blood circulation is terrible so think that may be my issue! Also in my scans my endometrial lining seemed thin (between 6mm and 8mm) so taking vitamins to try and support that!

Is there anything you are all doing to try and increase your chances? I've found accupuncture really helps zen me out and I'm on Chinese herbs (totally revolting so praying they work 😂)

Xx

@HopefulGlow That sounds great 😂 plus I love pancakes so even better!

Yes, the tree finally went up yesterday morning whilst singing along to Christmas music but ended up doing a last minute dash as I wanted more baubles. Spent the rest of the day finishing my Christmas shopping and making a roast dinner.

Off work again today, had a 4-day weekend booked off for my birthday so off out for tea & cake somewhere.

@Littlebun1 I’m glad it’s helped you feel you’re not alone in this. ❤️

I find that really frustrating too that they just assume that now you’ve got pregnant before there’s no issues - really gets to me. I’ve took it upon my self to book an appointment with my GP as I want some answers/advice what to do if I get another bfp regarding early tests/progesterone etc… , I suspect they may say nothing till you’ve hit the 3 miscarriage threshold but worth a try.

It’s great you’re taking proactive steps to try and help, if I’m honest I’m not doing much other than trying to eat a balanced diet and vitamins.

Xx.

@Littlebun1 I know how isolating it can be too. My mum knows and my best friend, but my mum got pregnant with all babies really quickly. She did have one early miscarriage though too 😔 my best friend was trying for almost a year and had to get help with her cycle from the doctor to conceive her baby. She doesn’t live in this country though so it’s been a different journey for her.

I don’t think I could tell anyone else tbh, I don’t know why but sometimes telling others and trying to explain how I’m feeling, feels more difficult.

I would definitely chase your doctors about more tests then! I hate that they delay tests after miscarriages, that should push them to get more answers ❤️

I’m going to acupuncture too, although will probably have a break now I’m moving and need to find another. She’s lovely and gave me some herbs. I take those when I remember. She says I have a cold core, so advises me to warm up with hot water bottles.

I take vitamins, eat fairly well but don’t stop myself from having ice cream if I want a scoop haha I rarely drink alcohol anymore and we use preseed in my fertile days.

My OH is due for SA on March, but he’s already had 2 children so I’m doubting it’s him. All my tests look good though 🤷🏼‍♀️

@AZ1992X the pancakes were so good. I needed them!!

Glad you put your tree up and got some more decorations ❤️ IT WAS YOUR BIRTHDAY WEEKEND?! Happy birthday 🥳 🎂 🎈 ❤️

Did you get anything nice?✨💕✨

Really sorry, posted this on the wrong thread, I’ll have it deleted

@HopefulGlow Yes it was - thank you ☺️, back to reality today though!

It was mainly things I asked for like hair stuff, Christmas book etc… and had some money & alcohol which I’ll probably save for Christmas.
I’m still to get some of my presents as not seen my family yet so I’ll get a few more to open up.

This cycles a bit of a mess- no idea what’s going off. If CD1 was first day of bleeding I’m now CD21 no positive opks and no temp increase so either not ovulating at all or it’s really late. Wish I knew which 🤷‍♀️.

Xx

@AZ1992X boo to reality!!!

Your birthday gifts sound lovely! Glad you still have more from the family. It makes your birthday longer haha

So sorry about your confusing cycle this month though! I wonder what’s going on with that? Have you had any slight rise in OPKs or anything?

Did you say you have booked a doctors appointment? I hope they look into things for you, it’s so frustrating being told to wait for everything. ✨💕✨

@HopefulGlow Yup, I’m not feeling work this week. Just got to get to next Friday when I break up for Christmas.

I wonder if the chemical delayed it slightly. Had a increase today to 0.65 from under 0.2 so hoping it’ll keep going up. Appointment a week today so hoping it goes well and it’s not more waiting.

Hope everyone’s week is going ok ❤️ Xx

@AZ1992X wahoooo!! Glad you’ve not got long until you break up for Christmas. I’m working up until Christmas Eve, but I don’t mind because it’s half a day 😁

Good that the temps are rising but you’re are right, maybe the chemical did delay it slightly 😔 I hope the doctors have some answers for you! ❤️

How is everyone else’s week going? ✨💕✨

@HopefulGlow six working days and counting 😂, glad you get to finish a little earlier on your last day too.

Finally got my peak today! Better late than never I guess.

X