TTC 4th baby at 39

[Hopetobeamumof4]

Hi girls,

I am so frustrated. I’ve been trying to conceive my fourth since feb. All 28-35 day cycles and no joy: this last cycle has been 45 days so far with me ovulating on cd32. Pregnancy test is negative today 😭 the doctor is not interested but has said he will test to see if I’m peri menopausal. I conceived first month with my other three. This is a new partner but he has a child so I don’t get what the problem is. Sorry I just needed to rant to someone who may understand x

@Monicatatie I didn’t have to test again, my period showed up last night 😭 It’s a really heavy one too. Even though I tested negative it’s still a kick in the teeth when your period arrives. I just want it to happen & really don’t think it will you know 😭 My little boy is 7 soon & the potential age gap is just getting bigger & bigger, urgh I feel fed up.

Will you test before your boozy lunch?

@msanne Thank you ❤️ Bet you’re going crazy symptom spotting with all those symptoms 🙈 Think we are all having some doubts this month weather if this is for the best, all for different reasons. Try & relax….easier said than done 😂

Literally done nothing today, I’m just sat with my son playing video games (bad mum) 🙈

@jellybean55 I'm so sorry you're feeling down about it. It's so frustrating when you really want something and it's out of your control. I'm sure it will happen for you. Dont worry about the age gap, any age gap has positive and negative aspects. Your son being older, you'll be able to enjoy the baby as if it's your first born, and your little boy will be a great helper. It does make things so much easier.
I remember you mentioning your GP who's really supportive, have you heard anything since?

I cant wait for kids to go back to school, they're just watching tv all day while I'm trying to do some work during my baby's naps. I feel so guilty too. Roll on Thursday!!!
I applied for a job at the university over a month ago, I didnt I'd get an interview as I'm not really qualified for it but I got an interview invite today, yay! I cant believe it, I am so excited (I had given up in my head). But it's fixed term so if I do get pregnant, I dont see it ending well.

I will definitely test before my bozzy lunch. In fact, I might go crazy and start testing tomorrow. I have absolutely zero symptoms again, no sore boobs or anything so i doubt i will get a positive result.

@msanne I know exactly what you mean as I have the same dilemma going over and over again in my head. I've been wanting it more during the tww though. Will be disappointed to get a bfn. Oh thanks for the tip. My husband wanted me to put my legs up instead lol, didnt feel like it. We should have done the deed an extra day after my positive opk but he didnt feel like it. I'll blame the bfn on him hehe

Bfn this morning! I'm 6 or 7 dpo 🤦‍♀️

Hi girls, how are we all getting on? @Monicatatie did you test again today? I am still getting positives on tests although they are faint now. Such a hard time as I just want to get my cycle back in action now. We’re going to try straight away.

@jellybean55 sorry the period came. It’s so frustrating and makes you feel so crap. Cycles seem to take forever as well to come around again. Just got to keep being positive. The month I got pregnant I elevated my hips on a pillow after sex. Worked for my three before as well and the cycle I got pregnant this time trying was when I did that. So as soon as I know I’m ovulating the pillow will be out 😂 wishing us all luck x

P.s only positive to no longer being pregnant is being back on the wine 🍷 also lost absolutely zero weight on my 6 week break from alcohol so it’s a myth that it puts weight on 😂😂😂 wish we could all meet up and get drunk x

@msanne did you test again? How are you? X

Hey ladies,

Glow says my period is due in 3 days but I am still getting BFN's on internet cheapies (not even a squint of a line)- I think I am either 11dpo or 10dpo today. I have symptoms galore at the moment - feel nauseous constantly and have a heavy twinging pain down there but hardly any CM, cervix feels pretty low and hard so I think I must be out this month. Part of me is relieved as I had a big blowout with my mum yesterday who thinks I am crazy to have a fourth, but in reality, I am gutted - I think in my heart of hearts this is something I want.

A bit confused and emotional at the moment about the whole thing.....just holding out for AF to rear her head and then I want to try again at least one more month ( I might keep saying this until it happens haha)!

@Hopetobeamumof4 - I would've loved to get drunk together - that is definitley what I need right now!

@Monicatatie - did you test again?

xoxo

Awww yes 💯 would love to get together and get drunk @Hopetobeamumof4 🥂🍹
Can you start using opks and crack on with ttc even if you're still testing positive? You made with laughter with your pillow coming out lol, good tip though. How long would you keep your legs up for?

I havent tested again today but ordered a frer which I'll do tomorrow morning just to make sure as I'm planning on drinking loaaaaads and loads tomorrow and want to do it with a clear conscience. I really doubt this month is it though, as I have absolutely zero symptoms and I also thinking we stopped dtd too soon into my cycle. We started cd11, did it every day until cd17 (skipping cd13 only) so when time we'll start later and hopefully make it to the finishing, especially as I know I ovulate quite late (for my positive on cd16).

I'm so sorry you had an argument with your mom, hope you're ok. I wont tell my parents until it's done as I'm also scared of their reaction. It's better to follow your heart than live with regrets. Sorry your bfn, it could change in the next few days though. Maybe the disappointed at the moment will help you realise you really want this?

@msanne Oh no that’s not good having a blowout with your Mum when you her support. It’s not her decision though & if it did happen I’m sure she would come round. We’ve not told anyone we are TTC as I know we would get negative reactions & it’s nothing to do with anyone else. My sister can’t have kids either so that’s a tough one but we have to do what’s right for us.

@Hopetobeamumof4 I’m deffo getting the pillow out next time I ovulate 😂😂

It’s hard to plan when you’re still showing positive on the tests, mine took a good few weeks to go back to negative. I agree with @Monicatatie & just crack on with it if you are up to it.

@Monicatatie fingers crossed you get your positive tomorrow & if not then have a guilt free time getting pissed! 🙌

We are all full of a bad cold in this house, I feel rotten. My son started coughing the day before school started! I was like ‘Try not to cough in bloody school’ I’d of gone mad him been sent home 🙈😂 We’ve all done covid tests which were negative.

Husband rang for his sperm results & he has to go back & have it retested because he used the pot from the doctors & not the hospital. Bloody useless, they should of made that clear before he emptied his load in the wrong pot! 😂

I’m not doing much this weekend, just a chilled one here. What’s everyone else up to? X

@msanne you’re not out until you’re out. I do know how frustrating it is though. My mum was utterly shocked when I told her I was pregnant. But she was also upset when I lost the baby and said about me trying again so doubt she would be shocked next time. I think you need to follow your heart, this is your life and you need to be happy and do what makes you happy. I’m sure your mum would love your baby if you had another one x

@Monicatatie god is love us all to go out drinking. It woukd be so fun! Bet you can’t wait for tomorrow, what will be your drinks of choice. Mines always wine. If I mix cocktails and wine it always ends very badly 😂 let us know what the test says tomorrow. How exciting! We have already started trying I suppose. I know I’m not ovulating as I always know when i am so hoping to catch it before it happens, when ever that might be. Apparently you can’t ovulate until the pregnancy test is completely negative so I’m hoping it will be within the next week. Just want it all to hurry up. I turn 40 in November and having a big party so I don’t want to end up not knowing whether I’m pregnant or not at my party as I want to DRINK! But I’d love to be pregnant by Christmas 😍 x

Oh no @jellybean55 how frustrating about the sperm results! What difference does it make in which pot it is? Hopefully it will be sorted out fairly soon for you.
Haha I also feel like that when anyone is coughing now 🤣

So my test was an obvious BFN and I have to say I'm feeling a little bit relieved (and a bit disappointed as well 🤯) because of the interview I have on Monday. If I do get it, I dont want to miss out on maternity pay 😜
Today my drink of choice will be cocktails @Hopetobeamumof4

Have a lovely weekend everyone xx

Hi ladies,

@Monicatatie, sorry about your bfn, but the weekend will be so much fun and you are so right about your job....no point missing out on mat pay!

Thanks to all of you for keeping me going in keeping hope....Attached are two cheapie pt...the one above is from yesterday...a bfn....the one underneath is from this morning.....I think, I can see a faint line but not sure if it's evap though?! I took the test on fmu but then went back to sleep without reading it....now I'm excited and scared! I've ordered a digital cb, but it doesn't arrive until tonight!

I would really appreciate your advice xoxo

@msanne I can see a line there! Go grab a first reaponse! They are the best for super early. Oh my god how exciting x

Oh my god yes!!!! I can definitely see a line @msanne eeeeek how exciting!

I'm raging, the restaurant I booked the bottomless brunch with have a gaz leak and cancelled my booking 😭😭😭😭

Thank you ladies @Hopetobeamumof4 and @Monicatatie. Time will tell I suppose - i took a FRER and it is a BFN - I shall test with the other one in the morning and hope to see something fingers crossed!

@Monicatatie - how crap about the restuarant - do you ladies have somewhere else you can go instead?

xoxo

@Monicatatie nooooooooo what the hell! X

Hey ladies,

Just wanted to say that I took another FRER this morning and there isn't even a hint of a line....i think the IC must have been an evap :(

I am disappointed - really got excited and started planning and now feel down in the dumps again. Just want this bloody period to start! AF is due tomorrow so she had better show up....

I know I ovulated this month (CB OPK) but I am not sure as I am still BF if this has messed up my cycle yet again....so fed up, but taking it for what it is.

At least I can drink again once the witch shows her face!!

How was your evening @Monicatatie - did you go out somewhere else?

xoxo

Oh no I'm so sorry @msanne I hope you're okay. I can understand the disappointed, but you're not out until af.
Has your period been regular since it returned? Mine is still oscillating, I go from a long cycle to a shorter one 🤯 normally I'm due today but wouldn't be surprised if it turned up later.

So we still went to town for a few drinks but nothing naughty and I was home early I'm turning into a geek 🤓🙄

@msanne oh I’m so sorry. This has happened to me with a few tests and it’s awful. But you’re not out until you’re out! And if not then we will all be going forward ttc together x

@jellybean55 how are you? Has your husband got the right pot yet? 😂😂 stupid tests and rules!

I’m on day 14 of my cycle. Still having faint positive tests so I have no idea if I can still ovulate or how messed up my cycle will be. I’m tempted to start doing ovulation tests about now to see. If things were normal I’d probably ovulate around Friday but who knows what will happen this time. I just want to get on with it x

How's everyone doing? I was reading this article and thought I'd share it with you ladies, it's about fertility and age, and it's NOT bad news 😊www.theatlantic.com/magazine/archive/2013/07/how-long-can-you-wait-to-have-a-baby/309374/

@Hopetobeamumof4 have you started using opks after all? Fingers crossed you will ovulate soon 🤞

I got my af right on track like my app predicted, which means we did dtd right up to ovulation and on the day, but not the day after 🤷‍♀️ a bit annoying

Hey @Monicatatie - interesting read indeed! We are still spring chickens! :P

After my initial upset of not getting a BFP (the IC must've been an evap) AF has started today - one day later than expected. Like you, I think we missed dtd on the day of Ovulation and that may have scuppered our chances. I had so many symptoms last month, but in my heart I knew as my other usual preganancy signs (CM and Cervix position) were totally invisible. Anyhow - we are back at square one this month - and have decided that we will try "properly" this month (i am already exhausted thinking about it lol)! If it still doesn't happen, we are going to settle with what we have - which tbh I wouldn't be overly disappointed with (I am just sad to not go through the whole newborn stage again - it is so precious)!! I also think my bank balance will be happy as I was impulse buying PT's over the weekend - it's so bad!!

I want to try temping this month - do any of you ladies do it?

How was your job interview?

Have a lovely sunny day everyone !! Older kids are at school - i've got tonnes of house work to do today, but i'm going to have a break and put my feet up. Currently got a coffee and croissant in hand - and I am going to drink myself a few glasses of wine tonight - hoorah!

xoxo

Hi All, thought I'd check in after a few weeks of getting used to the new job, which is going well. We're back ttc, month 6 of viable trying. I'm on 1 dpo and am taking a definite relaxed attitude to ttc because we got to the point where ttc sex was mechanical and neither of us were turned on particularly!

I'm 41 this week...omg talk about last chances!

Apologies for sporadically dipping in, life is so busy