TTC after MC - new thread for newbies / lurkers on other threads!

[Lowkeyloopy]

Hi all!

I know there are several threads dedicated to this topic, which I've lurked on for several weeks without saying anything, but some threads (sadly) have so many people on them that it can be a bit hard to follow, or it feels awkward to jump into the middle of a conversation between people who have been chatting for a while. Does anyone fancy joining me on a new thread?

My story: 33, TTC baby #1, conceived first cycle in Feb, but had a MC at 6 weeks in early March. Absolutely awful, as everyone knows, and I was in a rubbish place mentally for a few weeks, but I've also counted my blessings - it was early, I needed no medical intervention and at least I know I can conceive. Also AF has returned today - 29 days after first day of my MC. I usually have a 28-29 day cycle so am so grateful that my body seems to be getting with the programme again.

So CD1 for me, and I'll be TTC this month and back to tracking - BBT from tomorrow, OPKs from CD 11, still taking my Pregnacare and trying to keep exercising and eating healthily!

Would anyone like to join me if they're going through something similar? How have you been coping since your MC? What's on your TTC to-do list?! (Other than the obvious..!)

Baby dust to all xx

@CMcA21 Yes I think from Saturday and then every day until the day after your peak. Fingers crossed!

@lavenderlilaclily so sorry, that sounds awful. Loosing your baby that late must have been terrible.

I'm 7DPO today, AF is due a week today. I'm going to try and not test before then but not sure I'll have the self control. I just want to know either way.

Hi all, joining a little late to the thread. I'm currently having my first CP, started bleeding yesterday at 4 weeks on the dot. I'm an early ovulator and I tested early so I got my BFP last Wednesday. This was the 3rd cycle ttc baby #2. I've taken it really hard and I feel a bit silly for getting excited when we found out so early. We are going to get straight back on it as soon as I stop bleeding. I've decided all the bbt and fertility app stuff has just been adding to pressure and stress so this month it's just going to be as much BD as possible without worrying about dates. I've also vowed to myself I won't test until I'm a week late (or 5 weeks from yesterday, because who knows how long this cycle will be) I can't bear the idea of seeing a positive test and losing it again. I know there's no guarantees but the later I know the better I think, based on this month's experience. Anyway. Hello!

Omgoodness - took two tests this PM and both very very faint but definitely lines! I mean they are to me - husband still can barely see them but I've looked at enough negatives in my life!

Guess I did ovulate

Thanks @ItsMeantToBe that’s our plan then 😬 fingers crossed!

Hi @SparrowMaiden - hope you’re ok :( horrible what you’re going through but fingers crossed you’re okay to go again soon.

@ShoesEverywhere oooh exciting. Got everything crossed for you x

@ShoesEverywhere exciting, 🤞🏻🤞🏻 for you ✨

@ShoesEverywhere amazing! Fingers are crossed for you.

@SparrowMaiden sorry to hear what you've been through. I've had 2 CP's, my most recent one was last month at 5.2 weeks. I think it's impossible to not get excited. As soon as you POAS you're invested and planning. Hope you get a sticky BFP soon.

Thanks @CMcA21 and @ItsMeantToBe.

And yes congrats to @ShoesEverywhere! Good luck with it!

I definitely seem to have cone across a lot of examples of people very quickly conceiving after pregnancy loss so I hope everyone in this thread is so lucky xxx

Morning ladies! How is everyone doing? I'm on CD6 so will start using OPKs tomorrow I think. I'm currently putting all my energy into following a mediterranean diet (sadly this not include pizza?!? 😭) I've listened to loads of fertility podcasts and and apparently there's a lot of research to show it improves egg quality. It feels healthier than obsessing over my charts and weeing on sticks but I'm sure that will come next week.

@lavenderlilaclily I'm so sorry for your loss, you must be devastated. I hope have lots of support and you're taking care of yourself xx

Congratulations @ShoesEverywhere !! Wonderful news. It gives me so much hope to see these BFPs. How are you feeling?

Sorry to hear about your chemical @SparrowMaiden It's impossible not to get your hopes up when you see that second line. It definitely makes sense to take a break from tracking if it's stressing you out more. Wishing you lots of luck with this cycle!

How are all you ladies in the TWW getting on? Anyone symptom spotting?

Morning girls, I hope you're all doing well? A big hello to any newbies too, sorry you are all here after such sad news but it seems a very supportive thread, so welcome!

An update from me.. I've finally got a flashing smiley opk yesterday, so I'm feeling much better that my body is getting back on track! I'm cd19 today and usually have longer cycles. It's interesting that my Flo app says I ovulated yesterday even though going by OPKs I didn't! I did have some ewcm but I think I get this in the lead up.. it would make sense for it to be there fw. I only started using CB Digi last month and got a BFP (rest of the time it was mainly flo app and cheap opk) so fingers crossed I'm lucky again this month!

Good luck to you all, I hope it's another lucky thread xx

Hi ladies! 10dpo today and a BFN on an IC. Felt around for my cervix today and (TMI) could fit my full middle finger in before reaching my cervix. (Which was really soft, apparently a good sign, but who knows)

I’m due AF tomorrow, and feel like my cramps should have well and truly started up by now, but they haven’t! So I’m holding out a bit of hope still, but not much!

Anyone else been testing?

thanks everyone for kind messages 💕

congrats @ShoesEverywhere!!!

@Flopsy88 feels very unfair that a Mediterranean diet doesn't include pizza!! Maybe just a bit of pizza?

I'm also trying to do a healthy fertility diet at the moment, just about to make a beetroot and mackerel salad which I am not very excited about...I just want to be eating big bowls of pasta all the time.

@Aila1994 keeping fingers crossed for you! 10dpo is still pretty early and ICs aren't the most sensitive. And it's a good sign that AF cramps haven't started! Try again at 12dpo :)

I'm currently 7dpo I think and I'm having some light cramping. I had cramping with my last bfp, so I think the cramping doesn't mean I'm out, but equally doesn't mean I'm in with any chance at all either.

@Flopsy88 a diet without pizza is out of the question for me, ha.

My TWW is going so slow. I feel like I'm on day 100 (actually 8DPO). I normally have more signs of AF by now and I've been wanting nice fresh food for the past few days like salads, which I craved last time I was pregnant so I'm taking that as a good sign.

@Mrsmujic Great news! Fingers crossed for you.

@Aila1994 exciting! Good luck.

Has anyone thought of how they will tell their partner this time? Last time he was with me and read the result of the test to me but I want it to be a surprise this time. I'm also thinking I might test for a few days first before telling him, to make sure the line is getting darker. I'm not telling friends and family until I've had a scan, I hated breaking the bad news to them after my MC.

Hi Ladies..
I hope you dont mind me joining?
So sorry we are all in this position, but grateful to speak to people who know how i feel.
Me and my OH started trying in September and we couldn't believe our luck to fall straight away, but 1 week later i started bleeding and i miscarried naturally at 5+2. We were devasted. You never think it will happen to you.
We started trying again and in December, AF was late so we did a test but it was negative. But after another 6 days and still no AF i did another test and got another BFP. I was petrified and booked a private early scan for 7weeks but on the day of the scan i started bleeding heavily and miscarried naturally again. That was in January and weve been trying again since then. Every month is just so hard when AF arrives again. Weve not told any family or friends so its nice to speak to other people and let it all out. X

@ShoesEverywhere Congratulations! Fingers crossed for a sticky bean! Have you taken any more tests?

@Madeoftea I hope you have a lovely time at the seaside this weekend! We’ve done the same thing for a long weekend and it’s so good to get away and have some fresh air.

@Aila1994 @justwant2beamum @ItsMeantToBe How are you ladies later in your TWW doing? Any more testing? Hope everyone is staying sane!

@lavenderlilaclily you are very welcome to the thread and I’m so sorry for your loss and that you had to go through that horrific experience. I’m so sure your rainbow baby and so much happiness is just around the corner for you . I hope that cramping is implantation!

@SparrowMaiden welcome to the thread and I’m so sorry about your CP - definitely don’t feel silly at all - getting those two lines is a joyful thing. We can never control what happens afterwards but it’s still something that was right to celebrate. Good thinking about taking stress out of it - I read so many stories about women who are all “I finally relaxed and that’s when it happened!” For now the temping and OPKs doesn’t feel too stressful for me - I like the certainty it gives me, but I may change my tune in a few months...

Welcome @Scoaf and I’m so sorry you’ve been through this twice now. It’s so random and cruel. Remember your past doesn’t dictate your future with TTC, so your rainbow will come along soon. Where are you in your cycle now?

@Flopsy88 Good luck with your Med diet! Such a good idea - I guess the food we put in our body is the biggest thing we can do to alter our health! Since around the time lockdown started last year I’ve been nearly completely veggie - not for fertility really, but the extra energy (and clearer skin) I’ve had had been great! I do wonder if it was a factor in me getting (briefly..) PG first cycle TTC.

@Mrsmujic Good news on your flashing smiley! I understand the relief that your body is getting back on track! Hope you’ve a fun few days..!

@ItsMeantToBe - ooh good question. I don’t think I could keep it a surprise from my DP because I can’t keep anything to myself..! I think I’m going to wait as long as possible to test because I don’t want to put myself through the pain of a CP so soon after the MC (or ever really!). My AF is normally so regular that if it’s late that will be a very good sign. My DP will probably start casually enquiring about my AF when he knows it’s been around 2 weeks since all the DTD. I might tell my mum and best friend if we get past 7 weeks, but that might be it until 12 weeks.

So my FF chart is suggesting I’m 4DPO today! Though I’m not sure because I think my temping has been unreliable recently, partic CD14 and CD15. The temp jump is so small! Plus it’s saying O was the same day I got my peak which was in the evening! Seems too rapid. Checked chart for the month I conceived and it also said O was the day I got my peak - at least that peak was in the morning though so maybe O could’ve been in the evening! What do you guys think? I’m kicking myself for not DTD on CD13! (This is me not stressing about temping, haha)

@Lowkeyloopy AF is due for me today. Haven’t been having my usual cramps at all, but last night for about an hour - 2 hours I started cramping really bad.

That’s gone now and I feel pretty normal again. IC Tests are still negative this morning and I’m 11dpo, so would expect something.

Will test with a FRER in the morning if AF still hasn’t showed! 🤞

@Lowkeyloopy and honestly, I’m clueless about when I actually ovulate, because I don’t temp!

I use OPK’s, but every month without fail get 3 days of strong positives, so I’m never actually 100% sure of ovulation day! I just take it as the day after my strongest peak (even though sometimes it can be hard to tell)

Bfn for me at 11dpo on a frer so I'm out. Also out for May as partner going away for work which makes the bfn's even worse. Like there's only a few chances left in the year, I missed last month because that was the cycle post mc surgery and don't think I ovulated as bled days 1-13 then got af on cd27 and now away to miss May too.

@Lowkeyloopy
Thanks so much for your reply.
I'm trying so hard to stay positive.
I have been referred to the reacurrent miscarriage clinic but they are 6months behind with their appointments due to covid. Its just the not knowing if something is wrong.
Im currently 16Dpo and Af was due yesterday but im too scared to test. X

Oh I’m so sorry @justwant2beamum. I know it may not help much now (and I would struggle to hear this too) but remember in the great scheme of life, a month or two is very little - it’s only because of all the bloody waiting within each cycle that it feels like an age from month to month. Be kind to yourself - maybe try to find yourself something else to focus on for a couple of months. Maybe like a new exercise routine - something that will make you even healthier for when you can start trying again?

@Aila1994 I wouldnt write yourself off quite yet! 11 DPO might be too early for an IC and maybe that cramping could be implantation? Fingers firmly crossed for you!

@Scoaf Oh hun, I’m not surprised you’re feeling scared about it. I would be the same and think it’s totally ok not to test too if you don’t want to! If AF continues not to show you’ll know soon enough anyway, and presumably you’re not busy eating brie, pounding the wine and doing contact sports in the meantime 🙂 so there’s not much to be gained by knowing now if you think it might just make you nervous. That’s very frustrating about the appointment delay, but at least the referral is in and there’s kinda a target date to work towards. I’m sure nothing is wrong as such - the likelihood is you’ve just had bad luck. Have you heard of Bettina Rae? She’s on YouTube. She had two successfully pregnancies, then three MC, then another successful pregnancy. It’s just so random. Once you get that appointment date fixed, picture yourself sitting at home on that date thinking “crazy how I was going for fertility tests today when I’m actually now 5 months pregnant!” And laughing about it with your DP - both super chilled and happy. 🙂 @ItsMeantToBe recommended positive visualisation to me a few weeks ago and I’m really try to give it a go. I’m all about the science really of course, but still I reckon our bodies really respond to what’s going on in our minds.

@Lowkeyloopy
Aww thanks so much for being so lovely.
I just think my body is playing tricks on me as i have zero symptoms but with my other pregnancies i had lots so just dont know what to think really.
Hopefully you are right about my appointment 🤞🤞

@Scoaf I'm so sorry about your MCs :( it is so important to find a place to talk about it and to express your feelings, it's so hard isn't it, holding it all in and feeling like no one knows or understands. But hopefully you will find a good and supportive space here to talk about it and get support, and I'm sure you will get a beautiful sticky bfp very soon 💕

@Lowkeyloopy that's confusing about the temps/peak! I guess the way people's LH surges occur vary, so it's not out of the question that you might have ovulated the same day as your peak? Alternatively maybe the small temp jump meant you were just ovulating/about to ovulate that morning, after your peak the previous evening? So maybe you're actually 3dpo? I don't know though, it's all so confusing, I can't get my head around it! Either way keeping fingers crossed for you🤞

Turns out my slight cramps were not implantation cramps but a UTI 😣 got some more symptoms last night and went to the doc this morning and yep, UTI. How annoying!! I don't think UTIs technically would stop implantation, but I've just had infection after infection since giving birth 3 months ago, so I think my body must be in such an inflammatory state that conceiving doesn't seem very possible. But guess it's not over until AF shows! She's due on Tuesday so we'll see.

Oh so annoying @lavenderlilaclily - UTIs are the worst! I had one a few weeks ago. Cannot cope with them at all - so uncomfortable! Fortunately antibiotics cleared it right up quickly - hope you’re feeling better soon.

I stumbled across this thread while googling and thought I’d share in case of interest.. (so much for not symptom spotting during the 2WW).

pregnancyforum.momtastic.com/threads/for-all-you-2wwers.67978/

Well girls, looks like I’m out this month!

Fingers crossed for everyone still due to test in the upcoming days!

Hopefully next month is my month 🤞❤️!

Welcome @Scoaf sorry for what you've been through. We also haven't told anyone IRL that we're trying and I find this group really helpful, hope you do too.

@Lowkeyloopy My DH probably doesn't have a clue when AF Is due, I think it would take him a while before he asked. He'll probably be able to tell from my mood though. I'm 9DPO today, still a long way off before I'm going to test (if I manage to hold out). Absolutely 0 symptoms of AF or pregnancy. Normally by now my boobs would hurt even by breathing near them!
Sorry I can't help about your ovulation, I really don't have a clue about it. If I don't get pregnant this month I really need to research and get my head around it.

@justwant2beamum You never know! Try testing again in a few days if AF doesn't arrive.

@lavenderlilaclily Ouch! Hope you're stocked up with cranberry water!

@Aila1994 oh I'm sorry. Make the most of AF- drink lots of caffeine and lots of nice treats and then it's a nice fresh month.

@lavenderlilaclily
Thanks so much. Yes it is helping just to vent a little bit. AF is still a no show so did a test this monring and got a BFN so not sure whats going on there..

Sorry to hear you have got a UTI... hopefully you will be feeling better soon.
@ItsMeantToBe thanks so much.
We just dont want the added pressure lf leople asking questions. Everbody on here has been really lovely and it makes u feel less lonely.

As im quite new to all this isnt there any supplements people think help?
Im taking Vit D and Folic Acid but thats it