TTC #2 over 40

[Jem1979]

Anyone else TTC over the age of 40? I have a 19 month who was conceived first attempt. TTC #2 since June without success so far. Be good to hear from anyone in the same boat! I’m still bfeeding so wondering if that might be a factor. Plus my age obvs!

Hi @Jem1979 doing ok here. Am CD3. And waiting for fertile week next week.
Feeling positive... that it will happen sooner or later.

Hello @Jem1979 feeling positive during my fertile week and not so positive later. Mixture of feelings. Thinking maybe to start some supplements 🤷‍♀️🤔

Hi @Jem1979 good idea not to use ov sticks. It would definitely make me more relaxed too but as my cycles are irregular by up to around 10 days and my partner doesn’t have a very high sex drive I’m stuck doing sticks and then ordering him to perform when necessary! 😂
I’m 3dpo at the moment and this is the first month in the last year we’ve been trying that I feel we’ve actually given it enough of a shot. So I’ll be so disappointed if nothing happens at all. Sounds stupid but I’d rather a CP than a big fat nothing as then I know I’ve ovulated and timed it right. I would temp to confirm but my sleep is often disturbed so I don’t see much point! I did have my second vaccine though this month. Not sure if that has any impact!
@GingerFox2021 I am taking ALL the supplements since the last month and boy is it expensive! I figure after a few months if nothing has happened I’ll stop most of them. I’m feeling very desperate for something to happen which I know isn’t a helpful mindset but I just can’t help it! My daughter is nearly 4 and I’m worrying about the ever increasing age gap if it were to happen now. Gah!

@GingerFox2021 can't do any harm and at least you would feel like you were doing something to help you conceive. I'm still taking vitamin D, CoQ10 and folic.

@birdbybird great you are feeling positive and good luck for next week.

@Twothirtyam good luck too! That's hard for you trying to time DTD, I'm lucky I seem to ovulate consistently around CD14/15 and have a hubby 5 years younger than me who is always up for it!!! Lol. Oh I know that desperate feeling, it's crept into my mind at times and I try to bat it away and focus on the day to day and enjoying my wee boy. It's so hard though when you want another so much! I think an age gap doesn't really matter esp as you get older. There's 6 years between me and my oldest sister and we are super close x

@Jem1979 you’re right about the age gap I don’t know why I always get so worked up about it. Especially as there is a 7 year gap between me and my brother and like you we’re really close too!

@Jem1979 yes I am on the edge to try Ubiquinol- can’t really decide as I am not into self-prescribing supplements but might give a go.
@Twothirtyam you know, the age gap is no longer important for me as long as I get pregnant at all.
My sleep is also disturbed, so I don’t see point of temping really. I might be 2DPO, but kind of guessing.

@Jem1979 glad that stopping opks has made you more relaxed. i use ava, and it definitely puts more pressure on when you think you should be in the fertile window.

@GingerFox2021 i had a fertility consultation recently and she recommended "Co-enzyme Q10 200mg
three times a day, Vitamin D 1000 units as well as Omega 3 and fatty fish oils as well as Folic Acid
400mg as per the recommended guidance for pregnancy". i don't think this was specific to me at all, it was just generic guidance for what supplements to take, in case that's helpful. on the packet of ubiquinol it says not to take it if you're pregnant. do others who take it just take it from AF to ovulation date and then stop during the TWW?

she also said given my relatively low AMH levels (2.7), our chances of conceiving naturally are c.10%, so we're now considering IVF. though my husband also raised the possibility of not trying for a second today. That may be because we just spent the weekend with friends who have an angelic first child and a less than angelic second (!), but i think it's also because IVF is so expensive and there are no guarantees of success. i do think we would regret not trying for a second, but it's just so depressing getting my period every month, and i can imagine it would be even more depressing having paid a small fortune to give ourselves a better chance of a bfp :o(

@99pctpractice if you know you will regret not trying, it’s worth trying IVF. If it doesn’t happen at least you will know you did everything you could. But of course, fingers crossed that it works for you.

AF on her way here grrrr. Feeling a bit emotional this morning! Had a cry and will have a glass of wine later. Hope everyone has a nice weekend x

@Jem1979 sorry I’ve only just seen this don’t seem to get notifications reliably! How are you feeling? AF is the worst I hate how we have to have a period as well as not being pregnant!
I’m 13dpo today and just got a very faint positive on a pregnancy test. Although I’m not getting excited about it beyond being happy that I managed to time sex properly! I feel quite crampy and boobs are getting less sore so there’s every chance it’s a CP but it’s just nice to know that I’m still popping eggs out 😊

@Twothirtyam feeling much more positive again thanks, bring on the next cycle! Oooh that's good news.... def reassuring to know you've ovulated and timed the BD right! Really hope it's not a CP, keep us posted! x

Hello Ladies. I’ve done my day 21 progesterone blood test, will see what it shows. Deeply inside, I am starting worrying that it’s not happening, so wondering if I should try an acupuncture for a relaxation etc. Need somehow to relax. But some days I am very hopeful too @Jem1979
Good luck @Twothirtyam with testing! Hopefully it’s a real positive test.

Glad you’re feeling positive @Jem1979 !
@GingerFox2021 I do acupuncture and do find it really relaxing. It’s so expensive though I’ve got to say I’m going to have to cut back on it! I was having it three times a month and it’s £50 a pop! 😮

@Twothirtyam how long are you doing an acupuncture? And is it just acupuncture or fertility acupuncture? Did the acupuncturist suggest how many times to do it or it’s up to you?
In my area where I live in London it’s about 70-80£ per session.
I have just called Zita West Nutritionist to get some answers about Ubiquinol, so I might order one.
I agree all this is pricey, but you know I don’t want to look back later and regret that I didn’t try this or that. I think if it makes me less stressed, i will have a go.
How’s your testing? Did you test again?

@GingerFox2021 I’ve been varying how often I do it because I just wasn’t able to go very often due to other commitments earlier in the year. Then when life calmed down I went twice early in my cycle before ovulation (once a week) and then once after ovulation. I think when I did it before having my daughter I went once a week for a few weeks and then once every other week. But she leaves it up to me completely. I think once in the first half and one in the second half is a good amount. I can’t believe it’s so expensive in London! I’m on the south coast so used to London prices but that’s crazy! I take Ubiquonal too after speaking to a nutritionist. 300mgs a day was advised to me.
I didn’t test this morning as figured I’d just stress myself out not to see much line progression but have spent the afternoon with really uncomfortable cramps and then just now noticed my boobs had totally lost sensitivity (despite going sore again earlier in the day) so not holding out much hope! I’ve not even told my partner yet as I know he’d stress out so I’m just a gigantic ball of stress ready to pop! Need to get my daughter in bed and then just try and distract with some telly or a book or something.

Gah tested this morning and line is no darker in fact I think it’s slightly lighter! Stupid me also looked up potential due date wish I hadn’t done that. Ah well. Just need to try and calm and wait for AF to arrive. I’m so on edge at the moment I just want to go to sleep for a week and not think about it!

Grrr, I'm feeling your frustration over here. It's like torture isn't it? I never test early as just can't deal with it. Sorry to hear it's lighter but you are def not out til AF arrives? Hope you can distract yourself with something over the next day or two x

Total torture! I usually avoid testing early too but now I’ve started these supplements there are some I’m supposed to stop and some I’m supposed to start if pregnant so when I didn’t start spotting I thought I’d do a test to see just in case. AF is due today but I expect hormones will delay it by a day or two. I’m going to try and finish work early today and go and sit in a cafe and eat cake 😂

Hi All,

Do you mind if I join?
As background, I'm 41, have a ten month old baby who is amazing.... feel time is running out.. so TTC again. Took a long time last time- one MMC and then a year later, the day we were going to start IVF I found out I was pregnant!
So lucky to have my little one finally but if we can would love her to have a little sis or bro.
I am still breastfeeding a little bit, so don't know if that will make things more difficult.
I tested way too early this month, got a strong positive, which quickly changed and became a negative. Think we may be in for another rocky ride! Taking ubiquinol,
vitamin d and folate. Any tips welcome! 😊 xx

Hi @parks11 glad to have another over 40 Mum to share experiences with 😊
My first pregnancy was an MMC too and it was completely brutal. And sorry to hear you’ve had another CP, I’m just having my second since TTC number 2 and even though I know to expect it it’s still so horribly disappointing. So many of my friends (even those over 40) have popped out second babies no problem I assumed the same would happen for me stupidly! No advice really. I’m taking supplements like you are. The only thing I notice is that it’s the months we do lots more DTD that I actually manage to conceive. Sounds really obvious but my partner and I often only have sex once a month for various reasons so I have to make a real effort to get more active if I want a chance of a positive pregnancy test. I’m thinking of contacting the GP or possibly our local fertility clinic to speak to them about taking aspirin as I’ve read that can help pregnancies to stick. But I promised myself I wouldn’t go too crazy trying for number 2 so it’s a tricky call! I’m fairly sure the GP will fob me off anyway.

Hi and welcome @parks11 I hope your journey for number 2 is less complicated than for your first.

Sorry it's a CP @Twothirtyam it's so disappointing. Worth speaking to your GP. I contacted mine this week and have booked in for 21 day bloods. Though tbh the Doctor I spoke to was of the view that it can take 18 months and the fact I conceived after 9 was quick. But she did agree it's a good idea to rule out any issues with iron/thyroid. Bk using OPK's this month, AF just left so planning to DTD every other day until I get my peak. Hope everyone else doing ok. How's things progressing for you @gizmo167 x

Thanks @Twothirtyam and @Jem1979 for the welcome 😊
@Twothirtyam that's a good shout. I was advised to take low does aspirin when I was pregnant last time, so maybe I'll get ahead and take it again this time if it is supposed to help it stick.
I'm using the CB ovulation sticks to help everything. I don't tell my partner though as the pressure seems to put him off! So try to DTD not very much until the high fertility and peak shows on CB, so he is definitely in the mood 🙈🤣.
Fingers crossed we all get a sticky, healthy positive result soon x

Hi all!
For those that remember me I have had a break from it all this cycle due to me being away from partner over fertile window. So I haven't been temping or even taking any vitamins. Have also been drinking most days due to my 2 week holiday and it was my 43rd birthday on Wednesday... I was even out Friday night having cocktails and wine... anyway... realised I might be having a longer cycle and boobs looked a bit different Saturday morning... so I took a test and it's a BFP!

Obviously VERY early days, but does prove that when you relax, it can happen. Before that I had 12 cycles of temping, opks and timing dtd and nothing!

@Lastyearttc woo hoo! Congrats that's great news. Wishing you a happy healthy pregnancy! xx

Yes that’s amazing @Lastyearttc !!! Wishing you a good and easy pregnancy!