TTC after pregnancy loss - Thread 34 - huddle up and bring on the BFP's

[BunnytheBlueWhale]

Welcome to the 🐧 huddle. This a safe place to give and receive support for everyone who has experienced the loss(es) of a pregnancy or baby. Pregnancy and child loss is one of the most difficult things we can experience and it can also be the most lonely time too. I hope you find this thread to be of some comfort.

I have found so much comfort from the lovely ladies on this thread and I’m hoping for lots of BFPs in 2020!

🐧🐧🐧🐧🐧🐧🐧

[Ejb86]

Oh @mumlili8 I'm so sorry. I hope you get final answers soon and can begin the process of moving on. Life can be so cruel.

[BunnytheBlueWhale]

@Mumlili9 I’m so sorry. It must be difficult not knowing what’s going on as much and anything else. It’s a shame they can’t scan to check. I really hope it’s not ectopic. You’ve been through so much already. Be kind to yourself over the weekend and we are here if you need us even if you just want to vent xx

[MissSparkles81]

@Mumlili9 Im so sorry lovely. Hope the hospital can give you more answers on Monday. ❤

[MissSparkles81]

We managed another insemination last night. Bf is actually quite open to it all now so hopefully now that my fertile window is over we can try and resume some sort of normal sex life which will take the pressure off him a wee bit.

[mrsmb03]

Hello. I'm hoping someone could offer some advice please. We are going to ttc as soon as able to when miscarriage finishes. Is there anything that we could take or do to have a higher chance of conceiving? and staying pregnant? To help make sure I have quality eggs and DH have healthy sperm? Thank you ladies. x

[BunnytheBlueWhale]

@MissSparkles81 I’m glad that’s working for you insofar as BF is happy with it. This could be your month!

@mrsmb03 Not sure other than the simple stuff like don’t drink, keep alcohol to a minimum, have a healthy diet, prenatal vitamins / FA and try to dtd when you’re fertile! Maybe use an app like Ovia if you don’t want to track

[tmc14]

@MissSparkles81 thank you, that’s very kind. I do have a few unused calpol ones though that I think would work? I don’t think it’s mean at all to feel sad about the WhatsApp group. I’ve muted a very good friend on social media as she is pregnant, due when I would be. They were trying for over a year, she’s waited ages to be in a position to try, she deserves it so much and I’m so happy for her... but I don’t want to see photos of her bump! I think you can be happy for others but need to protect yourself.

So, I’m only 9dpo but was feeling really weird. Strange cramping and quite a lot of cm... so bought a frer and I think I see a very very faint wisp of a line. It’s so early I don’t really feel anything about it (apart from anxiety!) and I haven’t even mentioned it to DH... but am hoping hoping hoping that our single success at dtd 5 days before ovulation has worked 🤞

[BunnytheBlueWhale]

Oh that’s exciting @tmc14 🤞 I have muted pregnant friends and friends with newborns too. Has to be done sometimes...

[tmc14]

Thank you @BunnytheBlueWhale

I have an ovulation question actually... for those that temp and do opks so might know... I was reading that as you get older the time between the LH surge & ovulation can shorten, and both even be on the same day. I have always assumed ovulation is the day after my lh surge. Anyone have good info on this?

[BunnytheBlueWhale]

No I’ve never heard that @tmc but hopefully someone else might know

I just see as from the surge that Ov is probably imminent but try to dtd in the days leading up to expected ov anyway as sperm can live 5 days+ anyway (sources I’ve read usually say 5 days but some say longer)

Are you asking because you dtd 5 days before you think you ovulated? If so that’s definitely able to get you a BFP

[tmc14]

Yes @bunnythebluewhale I really thought I was out this month as I thought the 5 days survival for sperm was very optimistic for a couple in their 40s who try to be healthy but could do a lot better! So I guess I was just wondering if I might have ovulated the day of my positive opk and not the day after. Maybe I’m being a bit too obsessive!

[tmc14]

I think for future planning if this doesn’t turn out ok, I’ll maybe assume there’s a chance I ovulate really close to my lh surge.

[BunnytheBlueWhale]

@tmc14 It’s hard not to be obsessive occasionally but we’re probably never going to know what our bodies do each cycle. Regardless of age (and lifestyle - most of js could do better!) I assume some sperm last longer than others so even if your ages were a factor you probably would still have the longer last sperms, maybe just not as many as a 21 year old and same with the LH surge it probably isn’t exactly the same every cycle either. I’m sending good vibes and hoping this progresses the way we want🤞 x

[RR369]

Hi @tmc14 I've posted on here before but name changed recently. I didn't know about ovulating sooner after surge as you get older. I use temping and OPKs. This cycle I had static smiley peak on a Friday evening and ovulation pains the following day. Fertility Friend confirmed ov for the Sat. I've just turned 44. Do you temp? Really hoping your line gets stronger 🤞 when will you test again? Sending lots of baby dust xxx

[Morganmom]

@Mumlili8 I’m hoping the very best for you now!
@MissSparkles81 I have found the insemination works the best because DH does not feel pressure! I am gonna take a pic and put it on here of the syringe I got from amazon. I didn’t know that water hurt sperm so I’ve been washing it! Oops!

[tmc14]

Thanks @BunnytheBlueWhale & @rr369 tested those morning and a slightly darker line, realised I’d bought rapid response tests not early response 🤦🏻‍♀️ I usually just use internet cheapies. Such early days as I’m only 9/10dpo. Told DH. We’re just going to cautiously wait and see what happens.
I find the science fascinating. So many variables & yes, I think it comes down to everyone being different, so you can’t tell! I don’t temp as I have a toddler who still often wakes for a cuddle in the night so I don’t think it would be accurate, and I’d drive myself even more crazy!!

Hope everyone has some nice Sunday plans xx

[SweetpeaOrMarigold]

Good morning ladies, I'm sorry you are all here huddling but this seems such a lovely supportive group so I'm joining if thats ok?

I'm 38 had natural MC at 5wks in Dec, our first pregnancy together (1DS and 1 DSS). We were on holiday with the boys and I just had to hide it. The pain, the emergency toilet trips and the tears.
Bled for 10 days and didnt wait for AF.

Have huge sore boobs, nausea, cramps, metallic taste for 2 weeks and waiting for BFP but it didnt arrive.

Now spotting last 2 days and cramps like MC last night, one sided at one point and nearly went to epau with ?ectopic.
Overnight it settled with brufen and hot water bottle and now I'm just deflated and waiting for the blood. Not even had a bfp but I know I am/was growing someone.

On 4 nightshifts from tomorrow looking after sick babies. Not a place you can run to the loo easily, and constant reminder of what could be.
Just sad. Really sad. What if I can't do this? My body is letting me down.

[frillyfarmer]

Morning ladies. I just came on to say @bunnythebluewhale you're in my thoughts this month. I can't believe how quickly time comes round, hope you get your Rainbow soon, but also hope this month is kind to you xxx

[BunnytheBlueWhale]

@tmc14 Sounds positive especially if you have a line and it’s not even a FRER. Gentle congratulations. I find it all a bit fascinating too but haven’t even done OPKs the last couple of months so we’ll see how that works out 😬

@SweetpeaOrMarigold I’m sorry for what you’ve been through. This is a lovely group and you’re welcome to join us. It’s probably not ectopic but if you’re worried then you should get checked out.

@frillyfarmer Thank you. It’s so lovely of you to think of me. I hope you’re doing ok? xxx

[SweetpeaOrMarigold]

@BunnytheBlueWhale thanks for replying. Was in agony last night so knew it wasn't 'right'. Am bleeding properly now so will go to the GP tomorrow and get my thyroid levels checked as they are always a bit off. See if they will refer me for anything else as I'm old.

[mrsmb03]

@SweetpeaOrMarigold I'm so sorry to hear you're going through this. You think you're miscarrying again? Wish and pray you get through this. x

[BunnytheBlueWhale]

@SweetpeaOrMarigold I hope you have a good GP. Are you thinking this is the December MC still completing or that you could be MC again? Sorry I didn’t fully understand your first post but hope you’re ok and have real life support too x

[SweetpeaOrMarigold]

Yes 2nd time. Once 3rd Jan and now 2nd Feb. Really sad. OH is trying to be supportive but he doesn't get it.
Thought last time was a one off. Now I'm wondering if I can still make babies at 38.

[BunnytheBlueWhale]

@SweetpeaOrMarigold The fact you’ve got pregnant twice so close together is a positive sign. We all worry about age after 35 (I’m nearly 36) but women are having babies later and later. How old is your old is your DS if you don’t mind me asking? I lost my daughter last year (she was stillborn at full term) and I’ve had a MC since then but I’m trying to see the positive that I have had a baby so I probably still can. If you’re worried though definitely see your GP. Are you taking higher does folic acid? That might help xx

[SweetpeaOrMarigold]

Thanks I know I'm grateful we can at least get pregnant.
I'm so sorry for your loss, can't imagine how that must have been for you all.
My son is 10 and I'm taking high dose folic for coeliac disease. I have a couple of autoimmune disorders so I think its worth speaking to a GP. There are a few good ones in our practice, just pot luck though on the day.