Over 40 TTC - lots of baby dust for us...3!

[SparrowSG]

New thread for us 40+'s

Chatbash72 thank you for the positive words. I’ve been feeling a bit despondent about potentially not being able to give my son a sibling, but you’ve really helped shift my attitude back into positivity :)

Thanks @Chatbash72 for your perspective. @BooseysMom I agree with safe space rules and to my mind part of that includes feeling safe to express insecurities, envy, frustration and so on, as long as it's expressed respectfully. Part of the trauma of being 40 TTC is the myriad of mother and motherhood imagery we see in front of us everyday, and yes, that includes multiple children, as well as first babies, and so on. I hope to feel able to express my brain fog and lack of understanding of these things if and when they emerge in the conversation, and I aim to do so respectfully.

@CouldBeaGreatMum.. Yes I get it totally. Maybe i misread your previous post..sorry if that was the case. That's the problem with this isn't it?! Anyway I think your name says everything tbh..you deserve to be a great mum and I wish you every success ttc! x

Chat..you know what though? What's the biggest unfairness about all this is that I really think I'm still ovulating. Like Hellen said a few weeks ago, I have all the signs. Ewcm, the lot, but I feel like a fraud being here as we haven't ttc as much as they say. The reason? Because i'm too bloody scared!.. we just can't afford another. It's so unfair! DH got very ill and was made medically redundant so we held off, we were renting forever and at last now we've got a house but it's only a 2 bed and we can't afford a 3 bed as it's taken 14 years to even get a house and it was only thru shared ownership. So circumstances say NO we can't have a second..and yet and yet something still pushes me to ttc..pesky mother nature!

Hello ladies I haven't been by for a while as needed some time away. After the mc in December we started trying again and took a break in March. I've just had a bfp - slightly more symptoms than the last pregnancy (where I had nothing at all apart from fatigue) but still nothing compared to what I had with DD. I know every pregnancy can be different so I'm just rolling with it for the next few weeks or however long until I know whether this is going anywhere. I'm about 5w along so possibly too early to get much in the way of heavy symptoms but that doesn't stop me from obsessing over it!

I hope you're all well and a big hello to the new ladies ❤️ xx

Congratulations how old are you karryk

@Kimm123 thanks I'll be 42 next month

Im sooo excited for u. Is this your first x

Here goes my story. I am 42 years old.I have a boy 6 year old. My periods were regular until a couple of years ago they went to really heavy and now ive not had a period since jan 19. Im under the infertility and found out i had endometriosis polyp. So recently had that removed and she said to try after few weeks. I am taking folic acid. The blood test gynae did said im not menopausal and gave me some meds to start my period and then have clomid. Which to yet have not taken as had to get the polyp removed. Last week had a blood test at gp surgery and the dr said your hormone levels seem to be going up and down and that at the moment they are high which indicates your going through the change. 😂😂😂😂😂😂. So this is were i am at with trying to conceive. I would love to him my child a sibling. He always wants a brother or sister. Desperately need help or any ideas as to were i should go from here. Very much appreciated for your views 🌹🌹🌹

Karryk hope you do not mind if i ask you a few questions? Did you have any treatments or supplements for you to concieve? Did you have periods regular? The gynae did all the infertility tests with me and my partner and said everything is okay. Hope you can help x

Thanks @BooseysMom appreciate your message. I think you're right, hopefully communication will be clearer on my part also.

And I guess the thing is this forum is so helpful as I don't know about others, but I am not discussing our journey with anyone except DH. I'm sure it's the same for most people, unless they have a particularly close relationship with their mum or something. It's so good to be able to just talk about it!! I also have had a number of comments IRL recently asking "when I'm going to have children" from a few men (colleagues) based on my age and fairly new marital status. It's so infuriating! I don't even know what to say in that scenario!

@Kimm123 I have an almost 2 year old daughter I took some supplements - ubiquinol, vitamin e, omega oil, vitamin d and folate. I also have regular 5 elements acupuncture for general health and well being. That's about it really.

I had my daughter by c-section and apparently the scar tissue has blocked one of my tubes but I've had two pregnancies since then so I'm not too despondent.

My periods are regular albeit much lighter since i had my daughter

Congrats karry - fingers crossef this is it for you.

Kim - was it your FSH they were testing? Did they tell you what the number was? GP opinions can differ from surgery to surgery on levels and what they class as high, low or borderline, if you have the figure you can judge it yourself which i can be useful and more realistic. Also FSH can massively fluctuate so may not necessarily mean you are menopausal.
Great that you have been given the meds to kickstart things. So clinic obviously think all is still functioning or they wouldn't prescribe, they would leave it to nature to decide.

Hi Cleozeta. Thanku for replying. I dont know what the fsh level is but the dr said was high.i mean i can find out on monday. Have you tried the clomid? Are there any side effects and do you think it would help me because i dont have periods it is hard for me to time ovulation. Hope this makes sense. The one i got prescribed is Letrozole. But i have to have another tabs for 10days to have a bleed. She has only gave me 10 so that is like one shot isnt it?? So what do i do after that if i dont conceive? How many times can you have the clomid?? Ive got 28 tablets. Lol Gosh how hard is it for us ladies ey !!! Hopefully we should all concieve with our bundles of joy one day xx

Hi karryk did all the supplements come in one form of tablet or is it separate for each one? Thanks xx

Kim - I think it would be useful for you to know your numbers, just because what may be high to one doctor may ne normal to another, unless very high. I have done a lot of research on FSH so can help you decipher it if you like.
As for clomid, I only tried it once last cycle and it didn't really work for me (ovulation was delayed and sketchy and I wasn't monitored so no idea what happened) no side effects to report though. You only need 5 tablets per cycle so sounds like you will be set up for a while, will you be monitored on it? What days have you been told to take it?

@Kimm123 they were all separate..forgot to add that I've been taking royal jelly for the last month too. I've got enough pills to open my own pharmacy

KarryK- great news! I'll be hoping for you. It's a stressful time. At 5 weeks I didn't have many symptoms either but mine picked up after 5 weeks. Are you planning any early scans? I didn't because I won't feel reassured until I see a heartbeat after 10 weeks (due to my MMC) but it's hard not knowing!

Thanks @PetraRabbit I know what you mean - I had a scan at 7 weeks for my second pregnancy and all was fine but a week later it went pear-shaped

I think I'm going to wait and see if I can get to 8 weeks without any spotting (that's my tell-tale sign as all my mc have been before or around 8 weeks with bleeding just beforehand). Then I'll see if I can get an early scan at the EPU but if not I might just sit tight and wait until the official scan at 12 weeks. A bit of me is dying to know but at the same time it's so awful... I never enjoyed any of my scans with DD - I was always so so nervous. Apart from the time the EPU reception radio blared out the Beegees 'tragedy' as I was waiting to go in - that did make me laugh in a slightly hysterical way

Xx

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Congrats karryk wishing you a smooth pregnancy

Karryk - lol i know its true us ladies should get together and open a super extra all hours pharmacy 🙈🙈🙈🙈🙈
Cleozeta - i think i will ring the secretary up monday ask if i will need monitoring. Have u got any children? How old are u and what are your plans as in what are you thinking to do next ?? Hope it all works out for us all xx

Ooh the joys... spent the day at nephews 5th birthday.. my sis in laws friend came with her little ones inc 3.5 month old.. so spent the party having lots of cuddles and doing a bottle feed so mum could play with her eldest.. ( daddy had to work, so she was flying solo) was lush..
however another bro in law has had the snip so babies came up in the conversation this morning as we were chatting about the day.. which was very relaxed as monster in law wasn't there..
hubs then says not sure he does want any more as they have gotten to a hard stage ( 8&6) and he's not happy with the way the house is... but lip and DIDN'T say I've been working hard cos you decided to start your own business and finances have been bollocks and I haven't had the time or energy or money to keep renovating and decorating.. I've been putting food on the tables on not plaster on the walls!!! However he isn't going for the snip as he doesn't want to, he wants to keep having sex, so I'm guessing nothing changed just sad to hear him say it... however his actions with my little niece and nephew say otherwise.. I shall just put this down to verbal bluster.. and if I did fall preg well let's face it women do 99.9% of preg, birth and child rearing anyway.. 😞

Chat - maybe he was just having an off day and will go back to normal tomorrow! Mine are 6&8 too and house is generally chaos, and we are running out of space, so we are moving! DH would not expect me to do any DIY, and to be fair, if I did, it probably wouldn't end well! 🤣

Kim - I am 42, have 2 kids, been trying for #3 for 2 years and have history of high FSH & perimenopause symptoms, MMC and CP last year. Starting to panic now and thinking of IFV after house move

Hello all,

Joining you again... I’m 41 (42 in June), trying to conceive first child for 8 months, 2 very early miscarriages at 4.5 and 5.5 weeks.

So, I just took a test and got a positive! My period is 2 days late, but I assumed it was on its way as I was having lots of cramps. Apparently not...

I am surprised, as my partner and I both had a horrible cold during the run up to ovulation, so we only managed to try twice and were feeling rotten at the time.

I’m also suspecting that this is another chemical. The line was quite faint, and the cramping/period-like feeling with no other symptoms feels exactly the same as the last two times. It doesn’t really feel ‘real’, I’m trying not to let myself get too worked up about it yet and I’ve decided not to tell anyone except my partner (and Mumsnet!)

But, who knows - fingers crossed!

Congrats @turqouiseturtle fingers crossed for you...I hope it's third time lucky for you. Xx

D'oh! Spelled your name wrong! @turquoiseturtle

Managed to leave my purse at home when I went shopping earlier and countless other silly stuff, I may not have any other symptoms but I've definitely got baby brain