TTC #1 Journey starts now

[ladytmp]

Ok , that's it. I'm done leaving it to chance. Me and my partner definitely want to actively try for a baby. We've been letting nature take its course but not actively trying.
So I've downloaded Flo and added my last few period dates. I stopped the pill back in July after being on for 13 years.
I've got some of that seven seas Trying for a baby pre conception vitamins, I started my period very last last night/early hours this morning after being 3 days late . Normally I'm like clockwork with AF, but this month I'm late, starving, nauseous, and so tired. But obviously not pregnant if I'm on period!!
So today marks the start of us activily TTC. I'm making sure we DTD around my ovulation dates and I'm hoping for a BFP next time around...
I'm extremely clueless to pregnancy, I never realised how hard it actually is! School teaches you that it's a definite the moment you have unprotected sex!
I'm 25 yet feel like I no nothing!?
Can I test at any point or is it best to wait till the next time AF is due? As in wait till I'm late then do a test?
I don't smoke or drink heavily. May have a glass of wine here and there.
Any tips for this month? Hoping I'll get a BFP by December!!!
Fingers crossed!!
Anyone in the same boat?

@cherrylo86 Yeah i dont fully trust my flo app in regards to period or ovulation days... i take it as a rough guide, and try read the signs my body is giving me... which isnt a lot! I was thinking the exact same thing! I thought it would be one or two occasions of unprotected sex and BAM, pregnant... i had no idea how difficult it actually was!! Honestly its like they scare you so much in school with teen pregnancy horror stories and dont spend enough time actually teaching you about ovulations/ luteal phases and conception!

@ladytmp another one in the same boat! Came off the pill in July after being on it for 15 years, trying to conceive for baby number 1. I've not heard of the 'Flo' app - I've been using Ovia to track my periods/symptoms/fertile window etc, and using Fertility Friend as well for temping. Only starting temping this month, no positive OPKs this month though. Usually I at least catch the surge on them and have an idea I'm probably fertile!

Thankfully my cycles have been relatively regular, but surprised me in how light my periods have been since coming off the pill. I thought they'd be super heavy so I don't know if it's just still adjusting (there seems to be such mixed information around as to whether it takes a while for things to get 'normal' again).

Totally agree with what you said about feeling like not knowing anything and being surprised with how difficult it actually is. To think all the worry about 'accidentally' getting pregnant I've had over the years after the fear from 'sex ed' in school! Definitely isn't as easy as that it seems...!

Fingers crossed for you; I've just started posting on the site, but so grateful I found these sites or I'd think I'd gone crazy, not knowing if things are how they should be etc.

@EltzBee heya! my best mate recommended Flo to me , to be honest i use it more to track periods so i have a rough idea of when to carry tampons around with me

Same! my periods used to be pretty heavy on the pill...heavy to me anyway, but since stopping the pill, they've become really light... i reckon mine are back to normal now hopefully!! As like you, im very regular...

i joined here because i genuinely didnt have a clue what i was doing, or what was happening to my body! id go mad if i couldnt get any advice!

Im hoping this month , after regularly taking the Seven Seas Trying for a baby pills, ill get a BFP, i know they arent miracle workers but i can hope! Plus i feel like im actively doing more in preparing my body for a child rather than just sitting about going crazy, peeing on sticks and hoping for the best Its helping my mental state at least !!

@ladytmp yes, it is so much easier to have an app with a projected date rather than trying to work it out! I am glad they do seem to be around the right time it thinks, at least.

Ditto, it is so crazy isn't it. Ooh I've been taking folic acid since May/June, along with a multi-vitamin and extra B12. The Dr said for people having babies in the winter/spring they would need extra vitamin D, but that I shouldn't need that unless I'd conceived immediately back in July. I usually take that over the winter anyway as I so rarely get out in the sunshine then - it's dark when I get to the office, and dark when I leave! Totally know what you mean with the mental state - I don't want to get another few months down the line and find out I should have been doing something , so trying to be pro-active to give each month the best chance. I have to keep reminding myself that it is normal for it to take a while to reassure myself!

Hi hope it’s okay to join. I’m 25 and TTC #1. I’m calling this cycle 3 but it’s really going to be our first month putting in real effort. I’m on CD 4 and going to start using OPKs from day 10. It really is so confusing this TTC stuff.

Let’s hope this board is full of BFP!

Hey @MyloC looks like we are cycle buddies as I am on cd5.
Won't be long and we'll be in the fertile window 🤞 to us all x

@MrsC87 I am Mrs C too haha hopefully we both get BFP this month. Are you using OPKs or temping?

Ha hello my fellow Mrs C 😊 @MyloC
I'm using OPKs but not temping. I think at the moment stressing about my temp is not for me.
We are going for dtd every other day this cycle and using conceive plus! It helps when you just aren't in the mood (sounds awful I know but if we weren't ttc we wouldn't dtd as much as we are currently).

Ohh lots of messages on here today!
@MrsC87 No still no sign! Periodlike cramps appear to have gone now too! Just hoping soon it'll arrive.

I agree @EltzBee we spend our younger years worrying about getting pregnant and now start worrying about not getting pregnant!

Oh and I check my cervix throughout my cycle @MyloC (again sorry if too much information) however this is a good indicator of ovulation and if AF is on the way.

How many weeks ago is it now you came off the pill @Pastaallday? Are you doing OPK's?

@MrsC87 I finished my pill pack 10th September then had my usual bleed from that then didn't restart a new pack so officially off the pill from 17th Sept...4 weeks ago.

I have bought a load of the cheap opks from Amazon and did start testing about 2 weeks after I stopped. I got a line which wasn't as strong as the control line but pretty close and then next day it had gone! So dont know if that was a drf ovulation. I was going to wait until my period before k start testing again properly as assume I'm not ovualting right st the moment.
We were planning to start properly trying end of Dec but tbh are not being particularly careful at the moment.

I don't use OPKs, I think I'd stress more over them than temping. Too many variants in my eyes.
@MrsC87 how do you check your cervix? I only noticed this month that after ovulation, during DTD, DH seemed to be a lot 'deeper' than usual... so thinking my cervix dropped, which as I read, is meant to happen.

So you insert two fingers up until you can feel the doughnut shaped cervix. When you are not ovulating it's high & closed. when your ovulating or due to ovulate it drops low and open- you can definitely feel the difference when it is open!
When Af is due the cervix goes firm, low and open. I always know AF is coming from my cervix. The app Ovia helps with tracking your cervix.
I also check cervical mucus whilst checking my cervix.
I've definitely found whilst ttc you have to be at one with your own body lol!! @ExpectantPatronum

@MrsC87 totally get what you mean with the mood thing, TTC is tiring work. I’m the same don’t want to get too stressed with temping but going to use OPKs this month. Have been checking cervix and definitely beginning to get to know my body ha!
I’m feeling good about this month, last month was less positive!

well ladies...no luck for me... I pounced on him when he walked in which he enjoyed but then said he needed a shower...which he did, hes a mechanic so gets all oily and gross... we had a lovely night, watched dvds, i made food, we cuddled, went to bed and....nothing. Without being to graphic, i was feeling him up ect... we were cuddling, then he starts snoring....
Now... i do not mind he is tired. I do not mind if he isnt in the mood, i get my sex drive is higher than his...BUT what really frustrates me is this...
I was happy as we were just plodding along being with each other, not using protection but not TTC either... i would love a child, but there was no rush. HE was the one who suggested we actively try, he says he wants children before hes 30 (hes 28 right now) and when my period was late last cycle, we were both so excited ,and he was so damn happy. And when AF arrived we both felt so let down and sad he then said, dont worry we will try again this month... AND YET... we have now missed my ovulation dates, i feel like AF gonna come and hes gonna look all sad again and ill blame myself and i feel pressured in way, not to have a child because we both want that but like its all the effort is on me, and im no Virgin Mary, aint no Holy Ghost coming to impregnate me anytime soon, so unless he plans on DTD, then we gonna have wasted a ovulation period again!!

Am i being unreasonable? Help me ladies, my Hormones are all over the place... OMG could it be side effects of those seven seas pills??!!

@ladytmp I think you're being completely reasonable. He's the one putting time constraints on the situation but not wanting to do the necessary go get there.
I'd say sit him down and ask him what he knows about ovulation and conception. If he shrugs then explain to him about how our eggs are delicate little things and only live for 24 hours. So unless he has super sperm that lives for 5-7 days, then he's going to need to up his game.

Hi guys - can I join here too? Similar to quite a lot of you being 31 and came off the pill in July. Only started trying properly this month using OPKs and tracking my cycle. Got a static smiley using Clear Blue on the 8th and DTD the day before and day after. I know it’s probably too early but got a BFN this morning which has made me feel so rubbish. I’ve had six people I know tell me they are pregnant this week which has really upset me too. Feeling so down in the dumps even though I know it’s early days still.

@ExpectantPatronum thank you! i had to rant about it to someone as no one else knows we are TTC ...we dont want the added pressure! Hmm maybe youre right, i guess if i knew so little, i cant expect him to know
fingers crossed hes up for it tonight at least...
@DuchessCatherine welcome welcome !! i swear the minute you get a BFN like 5 people crawl out the woodwork announcing they're pregnant!! I try...(and fail) to wait till my period is late before doing a test... as hard as it is, i hate the feeling of being let down more than the anticipation of waiting to find out....

I'm exactly the same. I hate the let down.
@DuchessCatherine if you had your static on the 8th, that prob means you ovulated on the 9th which only makes you 9DPO today which I'd say is a bit early. Do you know how long your luteal phase is? Mine is 15 days so I know that testing at 9 for me is out the question.

Thanks @ladytmp, sending you good luck vibes for dtd and @expectantpatronum (love your username so much!) I think I’ve learnt my lesson regarding early testing - it’s so difficult not to get carried away but the disappointment is just the worst! I’m currently estimating a luteal phase of around 15 days as well so think I may have jumped the gun a little. It’s just so hard not to get hopes up!!

ladytmp I think they forget sometimes how much pressure there is for us! My husband is the same, super broody - more than me! - but it does get to be a bit tiring feeling like the pressure on conceiving is on us girls. Gosh, imagine if they were POAS to see if they were ovulating, or checking temperatures each day and then dealing with all the PMS etc. So totally think you're being fair and reasonable - when they turn around and say they're 'tired' it's like, seriously, you wanted to try this and it means potentially a month gone! Their 'every day the same' fertility rate obviously means they just think differently to us, I think.

@EltzBee exactly this! i think he genuinely thinks it doesnt matter when we DTD ill just get pregnant!!
Like @ExpectantPatronum said, he probably doesnt realise!
OMG LADIES! i just checked my flo app...i must have pressed days ahead because its ovulation day TODAY!! apparently !!
OMG...

@ladytmp yep, they really don't get it! Maybe they think we like religiously charting everything and not being able to go to the loo without analysing everything

Oooh, fingers crossed for you :) my app has updated to say I might still be fertile (my fertile week was meant to have ended Tuesday) cos it hasn't detected ovulation...the suspense!!! TMI but did BD yesterday (just in case, managed to get the husband to not realise why haha!)

Any other ladies come of the pill recently and seem no change at all? I always thought that being on the pill for over 17 years would mean I might see some hormonal changes etc after I come off it! Nothing though! Still not period...
Glad to see some ladies in their 30s on here to join me