anyone else just fucked off with this lark and want to moan?

[stillvicarinatutu]

come on then.
moan away.
ill start. i m just so fucking fucked off. lost one last year at 44....i thought its a miracle!! wasnt to be but filled me with what appears to be false hope.

been trying ever since. and no. every month the same. this month as well as AF ive another surprise - a cyst. where no one ever ever wants one.
so this month will be lost. along with all dignity as i beg the hospital to lance it.

moan away. go on. you know you want to.

Sorry @Justwaitingforaline for AF and the mean post. I totally get how amazing it would be to see even the slightest hint of a positive test - I've never got even as close as that!!!

I'm in my nightmare zone - ie final 4 days. I don't have a migraine which I thought was my dream scenario but I can feel my usual AF cramps starting up so am no more hopeful than usual anyway. Have started drinking again already - just a bit of wine but making me feel better.

Must not lose it again this month - last month was messy emotionally and I can't keep doing it to myself and DP over and over.

Cramps are well documented in early pregnancy jane!

I've started drinking at work (laidback office) it's helping the time pass

Oh my god @just as if people are so nasty. Since when did TTC become a competition?!!

Totally fucker shit about AF. Be kind to yourself xx

Af cramps are starting. I just want one chance to have a baby. It is breaking my heart and wearing me down. Life is totally shit. Totally and utterly fucking shit.

@juneybean haha! Love that you are drinking at work. Whatever gets you through!

Although I don't have a migraine I have had a general headacheyness for a few days. I'd love to pretend these cramps were something else but I think this is just pre-period. Boo!

@SoozC I'm so so sorry. Drinks, chocolate, whatever makes you feel comfy to get you through this bad day.

@SoozC I’m so sorry you’re feeling so down. I don’t really know what to say as I’ve been where you are so many times.

I stick 2 fingers up at my lack of bfps by eating shitloads of Brie and other things you can’t eat when pregnant.

And wine. Lots of wine.

@juneybean sounds like a great office! I wish mine was that laidback.

@Janefx40 no migraine is a good sign surely? You’re not out till AF. Fingers crossed for you.
I really want to see some people on here getting a bfp soon.

Can you imagine when someone does get a bfp on here? None of us will believe it!!

Thanks for words, going to comfort myself with a large caffeine-filled coffee at Starbucks later.

It would be so great!

If you want cheering up btw have a look in chat for the hedgehog thread. (Helped it cross the road)
I’m giggling like a mad thing at my desk

I could’ve done with your office today Juney. I love my job usually but am utterly loathing work atm. I can literally never forget ttc, it’s in my face hours every sodding day.

Sooz I’m sorry af is on her way. Enjoy your Starbucks.

Spoke too soon / headache is here.

When will it be our turn. Will it ever? Maybe I should just accept that DP and I met too old and we missed our chance.

I think it will almost be a relief when I am completely 100% past the age of possibility. At least then we can stop hoping.

Sorry to everyone going through the same misery today.

Yes please please someone get a BFP. Xxx

Sorry to hear it, @Janefx40. Big hugs x

@LimpLettice I used to feel when I ovulated too, funnily enough it stopped when I started TTC and got replaced unmediatey with 2+ weeks of sore breasts before AF which I had never had in my life before TTC. Naturally I was convinced I was pregnant. Ah, how naive I was...

@Justwaitingforaline so sorry to hear that AF has arrived

Beginning to think my AF is on her way, getting symptoms already and she's not even due till the 25th. I've never ever had an early period before but if I'm getting all these symptoms already and she's gonna hold out till the 25th then she's a bigger bitch than I thought!

Went to the sauna last night, couldn't get out of it, but it was only cooler hotel ones (never as hot) and I was only in a few minutes in each. Kinda glad I did now as AF is undeniably on her way.

I use my FitBit to measure my RHR too and it's already dropping as it does each month the day before and during AF. Urgh.

No sign of af, cramps didn't turn up after initial throbbing, suspect I'm 14 dpo now but can't be sure...don't know what to think. Can't get my hopes up. Probably I'll come on today.

Agree af is a bitch, @micropig.

I feel I should be in this group! On cycle 9 and feel so fed up like it's never gonna happen

Woken up at 4.30 with migraine so pretty sure I’m out.

Sigh

Thinking about getting husband a semen assessment - at least then I’ll know

Sooz it really would be amazing if you were out first. Fingers crossed.

Neg opk today. Confused as was convinced it would be Sunday. Bet we miss it this month. Stress even before 2ww😰

Our not out

Oh no Nimble. Hope it goes away fast.

Sorry @NimbleKnitter gutting and painful all in one - those bastard menstrual migraines eh?!! Hope it passes soon :(

@NimbleKnitter yes do the semen analysis - it's not all down to us. Actually got a bit frustrated the other day as lots of our male friends (all 40) assuming as they have younger partners they will have no problems. Obviously I hope they conceive easily. But it just doesn't occur to men that men's fertility (and age) makes a difference too!

I’ve just come back from my blood test. It all seems very real now, like we’re having ‘official’ fertility issues. I get the results of these ones on Tuesday so I guess it’s not long to wait.

Earth shatteringly bad migraine. Just spewed at work (so now everyone thinks I’m preggers even though I’m crying with pain)

Right now - I think I’d take the treatment and certain infertility

Oh no, @NimbleKnitter, I hope it passes quickly. :(