Hut of Gl/Doom, part IV - FTC, because that's what we do....

[duchesse]

Et voila.

This Hut is more of a Bedouin or desert tent than anything too gloomy. We shall supply our our own gloom.

Ah yes, Lissie that. 24th April for me. Sorry to hear that you're having a crap time at the moment, Lissie. Have you had any more thoughts/actions re pressuring your hospital trust into some assisted conception action?

tbh i dont trust our hospital any more. so will prob try to go private. cant do this much more tho. im still spotting and still have backache, sop am toatally paranoid coz this is how my ep went.

24th april? christ, how are you doing? have you got anything planned for that day?

Just wanted to wave in at the window to say Hi. I haven't had anything to say and have been fairly content mooching about kicking sand outside by myself. But I'm still around. I'm still trying, although it feels v different with dp on the go now too. We're now into her 2nd week wait so I am symptom spotting from the outside! She didn't test positive till 12 dpo with ds, which would be next Monday if she is miraculous again, which will be after I expect to insem, so we'll be Running The Risk again (pah, as if I will conceive...). But her trying breaks things up a lot. I had almost forgotten about my FTC because I've had excitement about her. I just haven't defined myself by my current position in my cycle, IYKWIM. Normally I know exactly where I am and it feels like the continuous roller coaster. Even though I haven't skipped a cycle I feel somehow as though I stepped off for a bit, and that's nice.

Anyway, having said I didn't have anything to say I've now hogged the sofa for far too long so it's back to the sand for me.

[whistles off into the distance]

Impatience - always good to hear from you. Please don't hang around outside too much - we'll miss you!

Am going quietly mad here as I enter the final days of the 2ww. It is becoming a form of torture that just seems to get worse each time. Am back to work tomorrow though so will have something to distract me. Also, my colleague's son died (I mentioned he was ill) so that's a good reminder of where I sit in the scheme of things.

Evening -
Just popped in to mix a very strong jug of Pimmms - it's on the bar - help yourselves, but hurry up as I've developed a real thirst ..... my af came today, which means I start the IVF roller coaster in 20 days time and I am officially on the wagon in RL.

This is pretty scary.

Glug, glug, glug.

SunChoc, I find myself pretty excited by your IVF starting. You have officially joined the Big League! Good luck, not least of all with the wagon...

Beansprout, is this the 19yr old with Leukaemia? That's so awful, and as you say a bit of a reality check. Not meant as any kind of 'come along girls let's pull our socks up' of course. Good luck with your sanity. Oh, sorry, too late

(I am still being aloof outside, but only just outside, with some of that pimms on the windowsill

My mum is coming to stay for a few days later this week. Can we have bets on when the first comment is made about 'my baby'? Ie, the biological child that I am so far missing out on? Ie, not dp's baby (the one that I've just spent an hour putting to sleep) but my own. You get the idea. She arrives about 7pm on Thursday. I bet 3.30pm Friday, half-way through our second pint. Any advance?

I'm going to give her the benefit of the doubt, and go for Saturday late morning. She'll try to get you on your own, so probably when your partner is putting the little one down for a nap, or is making lunch. But I still say Saturday, 11-12 in the morning. Do we win a glass of Pimm's? Am RL quite tiddly as have had wine after a few weeks off the demon drink- that's how we celebrate day 3 around here... One glass and I'm anybody's.

Very generous of you Duchesse. I've noted your Sat 11-12 bid.

Other distinct possibilities to guide you other betters are just as I'm clinging on to see who wins the marathon (so what's that, 11.19 Sunday? The fact I'll be very distracted will compensate for the fact she'll be sober), or just as I drive her to the station and am navigating a particularly tricky bit of road, est 4pm Sun.

Winner will get delicious carrot cake muffins cooked with specially ghee'd hash, to be swilled with my experimental vodka-skunk brew. They say we should relax to get pregnant. This is my solution

I'm going for the rank outsider - that she'll be charming all weekend, a real delight to be with.

ooh, if shes anything like my mum 8pm thursday! just as a casual off-the-cuff remark you understand

C'days: I wish!

Lissie: off-the-cuff, so there's no actual discussion or even any opportunity to register that anything was said? So it then just tumbles round and round your brain with no way out?

I'm going for the car option, as I always find that cars are conducive to slights and rows in general, given the unwelcome proximity they afford.

I was rather hoping I might get better odds by baking the rank outsider.... y'know lots of carrot cake, jug of G&T, choc and caffeine fixes....

Baking! lol. I meant backing!

Baking! lol. I meant backing!

Images of Imp's baked mum floating before eyes

Barbecue, anyone? Isn't it about time we ate some sustaining food in the Hut of Doom? All these cakes and sweets all the time can't be good for us.

Of course it's good for us!! Stuff like chocolate releasing endorphines, etc, is bound to make us more relaxed and less likely to FTC!!

For anyone mildly interested, I transferred my beardie eggs into incubator yesterday and there are 15. Now we just have to wait 65-85 days to see if any hatch!!

And I'll be eating loads cos I am beginning to get my usual pre-menstrual symptoms and can feel my period is on it's way! Raaaarhhhh!

I've got the usual pre-menstrual symptoms too. Can't bear it. Am so fed up.

impatience, my mother is vile! when i had my 1st mc she said "oooh you must be so relieved" when i had my 2nd she said IN THE HOSPITAL "well you must be doing something wrong" after my 3rd i got the "women like you arent supposed to have babies" (ive had eating disorders since i was 6 and severe pnd) and when my ep was diagnosed and i had to go straight to another hospital for the op she charged me £20 to take me.

sorry everyones having a shit time. but then i suppose thats what the hut is for. enter my fertile period tomorrow and really tempted to try again. i read that you are at your most fertile after youve been pg. am i mad?

Crikey Lissie Lou, I have heard some evil mother in law stories in my time but that your mother could be so hurtful and thoughtless.

I haven't been around for a while as I was off work last week but have been catching up and wanted to say how sorry I am about your news Lissie and also for Impatience - it hurts so much when you have allowed yourself to dream that this month could actually be the one.

Lissie - your MIL wins some sort of evil prize. She really is quite something.

I HATE this cramping leading up to my fecking period. I HATE these last few days. Cycle varies so am in limbo for the next few days as I don't even know when I am due.

And, IF YOU SEE ME LURKING ON THE DECEMBER THREAD, PLEASE F*CKING WELL SHOOT ME!!!

I thank you

oh beansprout {{hug}} and =-''' (thats hard drugs btw

and it was my MUM MiL is fab

sorry meant to put a after the mum bit. wasnt being nasty.

Sorry! In which case the apple falls a very, very long way from the tree!