Is it a line? Time for some wine? Yep, it's TTC after miscarriage thread number nine.

[BertieBotts]

Hello ladies

Hope you don't mind my little poem...

Fingers crossed for some sticky beans this time.

(Newbies welcome too!)

Think I'm CD1 today too. Actually i managed to get a really faint bfp and AF today so am just going to assume that it is AF and that blue dye tests were just created to mess with heads.

Strange that so many of us seem to be at same stage.

Am cheering myself up by telling myself I get another shot in 2 weeks!

turqioise I possibly stupidly?! went for the pharma nord after lots of googling. It's quite expensive though. (Stupid bit). I think it was 80 for 150 100mg tablets. I must say that I am noticing an improvement in energy levels though. Did you? It's possible it's due to other things but I've been quite surprised at the difference - I've had mild cfs symptoms for a long time due to several health issues.

As I'm 40 I thought it's worth attacking savings for as ivf is much more. Plus that I may get more energy. I guess time will see.

Ekphrasis

Thanks for that- just had a Google and it's €129.95 for 150 capsules.

Am feeling tempted!

Not sure if I noticed much difference with the Ubiquinol I was taking, but then I was always quite tired anyway.

Last year, I started taking folic acid when I found out I was pregnant at 7 weeks, re-starting within a week or two of the MMC.
Then after a few months I added in calcium & vitamin D tablets which I'm still taking now.

By November, no BFP so I splashed out on some Ubiquinol tablets. Feeling rather sceptical about them, despite positive things I've read online!
Maybe my ones were duff tablets?! I certainly didn't feel anything different when I was taking them.

I'm 38, going to turn 39 in a few months, so I feel I need all the help I can get.

Yes AF got me too. Oh well. I think we're going to start arranging tests this week.

CD20 and feeling like I need to do something move on with thoughts & life.

Just given nearly all of LO's baby/toddler clothes to friends & family.
I kept all the sentimental stuff obviously but the vast majority has all gone now.

Made myself feel v sad as this time last year we were discussing re-using all the clothes etc whether we had a boy or girl.

Think I just needed a mental, as well as physical, clearout.

Next step is putting the pram/pushchair & the cot up for sale on eBay or something.

Just need to do it for some reason.
Maybe once I've done all that, we'll get a BFP and have to buy it all again.

Here's hoping

Hi turquoise, I had done some googling and found another make that I'd worked out were good and were cheaper - but I can't remember which they were! I'll try to remember / re work it out!

The only other thing I take is a pregnacare tablet and a separate folate tablet (the natural form of folic acid). I'm following the guidance in "it starts with the egg" book. I always take a fish oil tablet anyway too. I'm on thyroxine for underactive thyroid. Have you had that checked? It also recommends cutting out caffeine and alcohol, also in the father too, for at least 3 months ideally as sperm and eggs take around 10-12 weeks to mature. Caffeine and alcohol can affect quality in both. dh is trying but not hugely impressed that this regime clashes with a pinnacle of his career type moment in 2 weeks which he is keen to celebrate

We can but try!

All I did for ds was take pregnacare! But that was at 35 and apparently 40 is a different kettle of fish. Apparently. Though many are fine!

Just read your later message. I'm sorry, it's tough. I would be 12 weeks tomorrow and likely to be having a scan this week if I'd not mc. Sorry for your loss

Sorry to everyone hit by af... lookatmoon I know it is confusing.. Hopefully your doing alright!
I'm feeling a little confused atm. On cd2 af arrived yesterday morning 26days.. Was heavy yesterday and some cramps and since about lunch time today has virtually stopped... Normally I have a good 5 days of af... Not complaining but it's still weird.. I'm knackered and a little bit nauseous, seriously tempted to go to bed.. Except it's bank holiday weekend and I really don't want to spend it sleeping..

Can I join? Was 8 weeks last Tuesday but started spotting on Thursday, went to the GP and got a referral to Epu for tomorrow, I managed to get a private scan on Saturday which showed the baby stopped growing at 5+6
I've had bleeding and cramping ever since, quite heavy so I'm hoping when I gave my EPU appointment on Tuesday everything will be clear and I can start thinking about ttc again
I have a 15 month old daughter so am very lucky in that respect. She took 21 months and a dose of clomid to conceive so it was very surprising to get upduffed this time in only 3 months with no drugs, fingers crossed it's as straightforward this time but realistically at 38, time's against me somewhat.

Jauncornetto so sorry for your loss hope you're taking care of yourself & you've got people around you.

It's a really lovely supportive group here, you're in the right place x

Sorry you find yourself here Jauncornetto - hopefully everything happens as naturally and as quickly as possible for you over the next few days.

Thanks Smurf - hope AF returns to *normal for you! Normal, boring and predictable are what I aim for now with this whole af/ttc/pg business.

So sorry for your loss jauncornetto. It's really shit, but the people here have definitely helped to make it a little easier to bear. 💐

I'm so sorry for your loss jaunecornetto, very similar happened to me at 8 weeks. Give your self time - physically as I found I was hit quite badly for around 10 days - and then later on emotionally too. Mine was over 3 weeks ago now. A break away and choosing to leave it a couple of months has helped hugely actually, though others find focussing on ttc helps.

I have no idea when to expect my next period either!

Hi Jaun , sorry to hear of your loss, which sounds very similar to mine. We chose to wait for "natural management" as my body seemed to be doing what it needed to. Got a BFN two weeks after the bleeding started, and OV-ed two weeks after that. We waited a complete cycle before getting back on the TTC horse, and I'm glad we did as my head really was in a shed last month. I cried as much when I came on as I did when I first started bleeding.

Now on CD30. Feeling pukey (for last 9 days), now got a nose like a bloodhound (since this Saturday) but tests are BFN. DH is being an absolute star, putting up with me at the moment! If I'm not pregnant this month, that's fine - I will try again next - but if I'm not I really should see a doctor about how sick I've been feeling! His thought is that we are pregnant, the tests just aren't showing it and worrying won't change anything so stop wasting money peeing on a stick every 12 hours! (He's actually hidden them now and says one will appear in the bathroom each morning until either we get a BFP or AF turns up )

Hi ladies, can I join? We are TTC #1 16 months with a miscarriage around month 3/4. Just about to start IVF and found out I'm pregnant. Too nervous to move to the pregnancy board yet as don't quite believe it yet. I got my BFP on day 21 of my 28-29 day cycle (!! something just told me to test...) and confirmed by blood test at hospital but too small to see anything on scan. (Or might be outside of the womb.) I am trying to remain calm and hopeful but not sure how and fully anticipating another MC. (Only got to five weeks last time...)

Sorry for the moan but feel I'm staring to lose the plot...
xx

@Jauncornetto, so sorry for your loss. Welcome to the thread. It's always a mixed feeling having people join us here - OTOH it's nice to welcome new faces to what is a lovely, warm, caring place but also it's horrible that anyone has to be here at all!

@meadowlark3 Welcome! Try not to panic - all seems totally normal to not be able to see anything on the scan - have you had any indications that this might end in MC? I know it's almost impossible but if not, do try and stay calm, it's good for you and for the baby. You're welcome here for as long as you feel you need to be here - but I'll be crossing my fingers for you that you'll be moving over to the Positivity in pregnancy after miscarriage thread in no time. :)

How is everyone else doing today? @emwithme, your DH sounds like a wee gem, bless him. Fingers crossed for a BFP for you! @TurquoiseDress, that sounds like both a hard but cathartic task - and yes, hopefully Sod's Law will come into play and you'll end up needing to rebuy it all very soon!

I'm CD13, usually O on CD18 so DH and I are gearing up for a week of DTD! We'll be on holiday for most of the dreaded 2WW which will be both good and bad - good because I'll be distracted, bad because we're away with family who will no doubt assume I'm already pregnant because I won't be drinking. Annoyingly AF will be due on a really busy, stressful day for me - I'm running a big event for 700+ people which is the last thing you want on CD1!

Trying to be a bit more zen and a bit less intense this month - so just DTD every second day for the next 2 weeks and hoping for the best! The first time we got pregnant was when we were barely trying (after a 6 month break from an 18 month period TTC) so I feel like maybe that's the trick! Hard to force yourself to be zen about it though...!

Thanks everyone for the welcome I'm surprised how un-devastated I feel at the moment but fully aware it may hit me like a ton of bricks later. My parents have been up since Thursday and going home tomorrow (they were visiting anyway) and BF has just taken them out with DD to give me some space. I'm feeling like an utter grinch and just want them to go home!
It must be a very stressful time meadowlark when's your next scan booked for? No offence but I hope you don't stay on this board for too long and get to move over to the pregnancy one soon

Welcome Jauncornetto I'm sorry you find yourself here. It's an emotional rollercoaster going through a miscarriage, I found some days were ok then some were awful. Take care of yourself in the next few days.

Meadowlark wishing you all the best for this pregnancy. I hope this one sticks for you.

AF has turned up for me which makes my cycle 32 days long which is pretty much what it was before my mc. Hopefully I can start a fresh this month now knowing my cycle is hopefully back to normal. Feeling gutter but at least I can have some wine tonight.

Tiffin Enjoy your wine tonight. I did feel much better when my cycle got back to normal post MMC - it took about 3 months I think. Here's hoping next month is the one for you.

Thanks peach it's lovely, a nice white burgundy. Yum. Downloaded the Ovia app so once af is out of the way I can start this ttc business properly. Temping (and recording it!), opks, heart rate the lot!

Welcome Jaun, everyone is different, I also felt fairly undevastated by my miscarriages, we sort of knew we had higher chances of them, so perhaps that was why, but I mostly felt disappointed and frustrated at the time lost rather than feeling like I'd lost a baby.

Bertie that's pretty much how I felt. Yes, there were tears but they were never really uncontrollable (apart from the first night after it was confirmed) and then it was just "right, let's get on with this". I am 40, and every woman on my maternal side has had at least one MC (one poor aunty had 8, plus a still birth, before finally having my cousin) so I was kind of resigned to the fact that I would have them.

AF has arrived this evening, so I've had a monkey-hot bath and a glass of wine, and a giant squishy hug off DH, and am now planning to get Very Drunk at the posh meal (one of those where they pair the wine with the course) that we've got booked for Wednesday night.

Weirdly I was much less emotional about my MC at the time than I am now - I think it was a self-preservation thing? Not sure. But feelings can definitely change over time - and then change back again, and then back again - I think that's totally normal.

That's how I feel at the moment Bertie and em. I think the time it took me to conceive Dd made me view ttc with pessimism - as a kind of self protection mechanism. The fact I didn't have a scan until I knew it was going wrong has probably made it easier as I'm very much of the 'try not to get excited until you've seen a healthy scan' mindset.