Ttc after miscarriage thread #8

[Miami81]

Hey. Just starting new thread. Hope the rest of you find it.

Thank you all. I feel sick with fear at facing this all again. Fuck, what I would give for some naivety right now.

Yes I can deffo see a line! I've been squinting at my own all weekend. After getting a positive with a FR yesterday I've tested with a CB digital today and got a big fat not pregnant....not sure what to think now after googleing the shit out of it!

user, the digis need a much higher level of HCG - like 50 compared to 10 of the FRER. This happens to a lot of people because levels of all the tests are so varied.

You're due af Weds? A digi should be showing it by then, but maybe do another FRER Weds and wait till Friday for the digi? I know it's shit and confusing but try not to worry x

Thanks Anne you are so lovely.

I did read they needed a higher level of HCG.like you said I will wait until Friday I think. I have a busy week anyway so that will keep me busy. How are you feeling now?

Busy is good! Makes time move much faster. My day whizzed past thankfully.

I'm beyond shattered to be honest and feel the size of a bloody house. Boobs are killing me, sore back off and on, so bloated. I'm wearing a lot of scarves and drapey cardis! Most annoying thing is my super nose. DH and pickles smell gorgeous but nearly everything else is gross and makes me want to throw up.

When I saw the nurse for my b12 jab she said after 3 pregnancies in such quick succession I must be awash with hormones so I'm keeping that in mind and not pinning my hopes on this being a new one.

Long cycle for me, usually 26 days, but, again, it's a post mc one and I had a weird 30 dayer a cycle ago so just playing the waiting game.

Congrats putputput! Fingers crossed for a sticky one.

user I agree with Anne. Try not to worry too much about the CB and try again in a few days.

Well I caved and did a test. OF COURSE it was a bfn! Feel cross with myself now. I used to be such a rational person! TTC really does drive you bonkers. And I bought a 2 pack so now I've got one in the house. I prefer to try and maintain a test free environment. Anyway, at least my whirring mind can have a rest now. Well, until the next TWW anyway.

Anne I am very impressed with your resolve to not test. If you make it to Wednesday you will deserve a medal!

Sorry it was a bfn keepon and don't be annoyed with yourself. We've ALL been there. But fresh new cycle next time x Treat yourself to a proper drink!

And I haven't been good at all! Caved yesterday and got a bfn on free so going to just wait for af and give it a couple more days.

Can I have a hand hold?

I'm sitting here in tears as I'm feeling so hormonal, I'm due AF on Friday and definitely feel like she is rearing her ugly head. I've swung between anger and tears today.

I used my anger productively to write a letter to my doctors to tell them they have really upset me due to the way I was poorly looked after in my pregnancy which I feel contributed towards my mmc.

Congratulations put user I'd wait a few more days that was definitely a positive you got. anne it all sounds positive. theother well done for using your anger towards something positive me i threw my remote at the wall when i was really fed up. I'm really hoping i was lucky and didn't ov till late but i don't think i was keep getting on off tummy and back cramps had a sharp twinge yesterday left side but my boobs keep feeling funny i think af will show her ugly face and then I'll be out the running forever. As dp won't change his mind. it hurts just as much as losing my baby.

sock holding your hand x

As fluff says, well done for putting your anger towards something productive and cathartic.

I wish there was something someone could say fluff Have things been manageable the last few days at home? I'm praying for a little miracle for you.

Congrats put that's definitely a cross!

Quick question, when do you start your cycle from, day of surgery or day of negative pregnancy test? If it's surgery then I'm CD8, but had another positive pregnancy test today, getting fainter and fainter, but I don't know when I'm counting from?

Anne things are ok ish. I'm praying he'll change his mind but i don't think he will. I just need to decide if I can live with not trying again. Zyla my cycle seems to be a week behind just waiting for af anytime now.

zyla I've just my erpc date to date everything from then. Bled for a few days but didnt get a negative until 2 weeks later. Ovulated 2 weeks after too (so within a few says of negative test) that's why I am assuming im due on Wednesday but can't be sure x

I had af 28 days after my MVA. Think I ovulated in the middle of that, so two weeks after surgery and before af zyla.

fluff, I can't imagine being in that position. My heart goes out to you.

Thank you for the support ladies. I honestly don't know where I would be without this forum.

I took myself off to a dance class this evening which I was hideously bad at, but I've come back feeling more level headed.

Dance class sounds fun! I admire your energy

How are you doing today sock?

How's everyone?

Looks like AF is showing up...gutted as I really thought that was a positive I had at the weekend. Ah well at least I'm going into a fresh month for TTC.

Just done a test 6 days early and it's a BFN!! Trying not to get too disheartened but think af is defo on way

Bloody hell user, really? Have you had a bfn on a normal two liner? If not it could definitely just be spotting. Shit, so sorry if this is af

Ages to go still amanda don't give up till af is here.

Oh user I'm so sorry, that's gutting. It really looked like a BFP to me. sock, hope you're feeling a little better today - hopefully writing the letter will have helped you express some of your feelings and start healing. zyla, my cycle after my ERPC was much shorter than normal - personally I didn't start properly tracking until after my first AF. Anne, I'm so impressed at your restraint! Just starting the 2WW myself so please remind me of my admiration for your resolve when I'm umm-ing and ahh-ing about testing early in ten days time!

Hello ladies,

Thank you to everyone who has asked after me today. I do feel better today, my letter has had the desired effect as the practice manager phoned me back today and has booked me an appointment with a doctor who she feels will be more sympathetic towards me.

And the dance class was fab it's called Bhangra Blaze and is the most insane class I've ever been to. I had a chat to the instructor to ask if I can continue if I become pregnant and she said yes, just to do what I felt I could do. Then she said she hopes all the energetic dancing would encourage my blood flow and help me become pregnant.

Well AF didn't actually show up so I'm even more miffed now. Just on off spotting varying from pink to brown most of the day. Going to hold off until the weekend now as I'm driving myself mad with all this testing.

Hope everyone is OK x

Fingers crossed AF stays away user and it was implantation causing your symptoms.

Anne how are you getting on.

socks I'm glad your letter has been taken notice of and you enjoyed your dance class. I hope you're feeling a bit better today.

Not much to report here other than I'm desperately trying not to feel cross with DH. I'm coming into my fertile week and he's feeling ill again, exactly the same as last month. Then he's off to London for work tomorrow morning until Friday and the my parents are coming up for the weekend. Feel like I should just write this month off now!

Keepon
I know that stress. Really annoying when they can't man up as such!! Or aren't even in the right place at the right time. Makes me VERY mean and not proud of myself.

Hello all! I was around on these threads about 8 months ago after one v early miscarriage. I went on to have a second the following month & gave up trying for DC3 because I couldn't deal with it. Today would've been my due date the first time & I'm pretty sure I'm pregnant again. I'm only on CD24 but every other pregnancy has had symptoms from CD21 & I've been feeling queasy & dizzy for days now. Until today I was cautiously optimistic about this time but this afternoon I've felt really down & am now convinced that this one won't stick. My only "evidence" for this conclusion is that I only had about an hour of symptoms on CD21 with my pregnancies that resulted in DC but felt ill from CD21 until I started bleeding with the 2 that ended. I've been feeling dodgy for days, therefore it's not going to happen.

We weren't even trying this time & DH doesn't really want any more DC, although he insists he'd love any that came along. He totally doesn't get how I'm feeling & there's probably a part of him that would be relieved if it didn't stick. I feel like this is my last chance tbh - if it doesn't work out this time then DH will probably be keen to be a bit more focussed on contraception so it can't happen without us actively trying & he's pretty set on not doing that!

My head's a mess today!