40+ ttc: the one where we all get knocked up!

[ababsurdum]

Shiny new thread. Here's the link to the previous one.

AF was really light too. No where near as heavy as my last one after a 37 day cycle. I don't know what's going on. We keep dtd anyway just in case. Beginning to wonder if I'm peri menopausal.

Lovely to hear your news Bloop..!!! Likewise hoping you and Giz stay.

Hope things settle down with your cycle Mrs Barnett.

Hope everyone else doing ok. That sounds wise to have a week off fuzzy, hoping you're ok.

to all of us

Wuhoo I learnt how to do .. Thx for earlier tips!!

Nice work, Clara!

Mrsbarnett I don't think a long cycle necessarily means a heavier AF. The lining doesn't keep building up. I hope it's not peri menopause!

I hope everyone is well.

I had the smear test and am on cd14. Haven't managed much sex but none of the usual ovulation signs either.

Pies ha, I can't remember when we last had a morning quickie. Probably when ttc ds so a while ago. These days we try to get as much sleep as possible as ds usually wakes at 5-something . Glad you got your smear up to date, always good. I agree to no sex before, you don't want them having to wipe that away to get to your cervix... still, I'm sure they've seen it all.

I'm possibly 6dpo today - who knows. Too early for any symptom spotting. Yawn!

I hope everyone is doing ok.

Ha, ababs we snuck in a quickie this morning while ds watched an episode of Dinopaws. He's glued to the television for that, but little else. There's nothing like knowing you have a deadline 13 minutes from now!

Kudos to you Pies, I'm impressed!

Hi all, and thank you for your thoughts. I've been laying low for a while. It's been a tough time, as most of you know.

Had my protocol through for the next IVF in Dec/Jan, accompanied by a very bleak letter from the consultant saying that the last round confirmed low egg quality and he expects the same outcome next time. We've paid for it, so we may as well use it, but I'm just going through the motions until we can get to donor eggs.

On CD something today - not ovulated yet I don't think but should be soon. No opks, no tracking, no obsessing this month. Feeling very resigned to it being over for my own eggs. Happy to dtd every night for a while - DH is still determined and hoping for a miracle. Bless.

Good luck everyone - well done Pies - a ninja-shag is as good as any!

I'm sorry Fuzzy, that's hard to hear. Does the package you've paid for exclude the use of donor eggs or could you tack it on if you wanted to expedite the use of them?

Otherwise, you never know so don't stop trying. Many women have fallen pg when doctors have told them there's zero chance. Hopefully you've still got at least one good egg left .

Thanks ababs. No, the multicycle only covers 2 fresh cycles & FETs with our own eggs. I really didn't think it would be such a disaster. I conceived Billy-Joe in the first month of trying just 3 years ago. Hard to believe how much my fertility has dropped off a cliff in such a short time.

Oh, Fuzzy, that's really hard. As ababs says, you never know. Will be keeping everything crossed for you that there is a good one in there soon

Pies, hope you've been enjoying your ninja shags and ababs, hope the 2ww isn't driving you nuts. And a big wave to everyone else, too!

Fuzzy, sorry you are having such a tough time.. I agree with Ababs and Giz that docs not always right on this stuff. Lots of us know people who have been told this and still conceived. Pls don't give up. Good on your DH!

Maybe we shd pop onto the 40s+ pg thread to ask any of them who were told they had low egg quality what happened and how they conceived. Might be wrong but I think Jessie fm an earlier 40s thread was in that situation and then conceived thru a subsequent round IVF. Sending you big hugs.

Well done Pies and hi all. How's Bloop?

Hi ladies, I am no longer ttc but thought I would share my story. I conceived easily in my 30's but when we decided to try again in my 40's it was like my fertility had dropped off a cliff.

I conceived at 42 then mmc at 9 weeks. I then conceived again at 44 and mc at 20 weeks. The tests showed the baby was normal and we decided we would try again but AMH and LH tests showed I was fast approaching menopause and running out of eggs. We hoped we would be lucky again and find that one golden egg but then my husband became ill and chemo put paid to trying again. We looked into IVF but because I was 45 the clinic said it was unlikely to be successful using my own eggs.

So we gave up. Then surprising, with fully recovered husband I fell pregnant at 46, but again mc, this time at 6 weeks so I guessed my eggs were done.

However a few months ago at age 48 I gave birth to a perfect baby boy. When I discovered I was pregnant I felt sure it would not last and it would end in another mc and we are still gobsmacked that he is here. I have never met anyone who conceived naturally at my age and I wanted to share my story with you all to say don't give up hope as amazing things can happen even when you think it is all over.

I wish you all lots and lots of luck x

Thank you for sharing your story Lifeatthebeach. I'm terribly sorry for your mc's, that must have been awful, but what an amazing outcome for you. It gives us all hope.

The 2ww isn't driving me nuts yet, I'm really not expecting anything given early ovulation. I'm possibly 9dpo today (had to check!).

Yes, thank you Lifeatthebeach. Your story is amazing! Our fertility specialist must use the phrase 'older lady' 100 times every time we see him, and his attitude is that we have a very small window up to my 43rd birthday, after which time my natural fertility will be zero. Stories like yours put two fingers up to that kind of negativity.

Thank you ababsurdum and MrFuzzyGreen, interestingly the clinic I spoke to were very very negative when was 45, as was every doctor. However the antenatal consultant that looked after me when I was pregnant this time had a different view. He said he had seen quite a few ladies my age with successful outcomes, he also said in our grandmother's day before effective contraception it would not have been unusual to see ladies pregnant in their mid or even late 40's. So my view now is that if you are having periods you can get pregnant, yes egg quality will be declining which will raise the chance of miscarriage, but don't give up hope because we all will have some good eggs left. I struggled to get pregnant post 40, and the only time I did was when I was taking Berroca daily, I have no idea if it was a coincidence but I would have tried anything! I have not posted on any forum anywhere before and wanted to post here because I found when we were trying that you do not hear enough about the successes and I would really have found that helpful.

Indeed Lifeonthebeach. I've posted this before but I read that there were more babies conceived by over 40's post war than in 2011.

Interesting about the Berocca!

Thanks so much for telling us your story, Lifeonthebeach. So sorry for your losses but what a lovely outcome in the end.

Sorry for butting in but both my grandmas had their children in their late 30s/early 40s (we're talking 1950s) so its hardly a new phenomenon.

I've read the same. In the 1920's it wasn't unusual to be having your last child when you were already a grandmother, and the average age for your last child was 42. So having children later in life is by no means a new phenomenon. I suppose women back then didn't know about chemical pregnancies because they couldn't test, and weren't bombarded by the media telling them they were past it. So they just got on with it. Perhaps there are lessons to be learned there....

Agreed Fuzzy but in my grandmas' cases they were having their first child later in life. I'm just trying to think that I've skipped a generation. My mum had me fairly young. Women should have children, if they are able, at any time of life.

Hello ladies - I've been active in this thread and the others re 40 plus ttc in the past and always am lurking! In fact been following this thread for a couple of years now! I just have to step back a little as I do find it quite difficult at timess. I read the posts regularly and laugh and cry often at your posts and at what we all go through. Just thought I would pop in to say hello and to also thank LIFEON THEBEACH for your post

I have just had another chemical and having a particularly shitty time and your story has given me hope! I'm so sorry for all you have been through but you have shown that there can be a happy ending. Thank you for sharing. Wishing all of us much love and luck on our TTC journey - stay strong ladies xxxx

Hi MattsMamma and welcome. Sorry to hear about your chemical but lots of love and luck to you.

How is everyone getting on?

Thanks for the positive story, lifeatthebeach. Wow - 48! Congratulations on your precious new baby.

Sorry, MattsMummy. That is so hard. I remember you. Hang in there. When you can bear to be posting, we are around.

Cd18 here. Possibly in the 2WW, possibly not. I had more bleeding over the weekend, mid-cycle. Yay for weird post-mc cycles. Apart from the occasional ninja shag, we haven't exactly been covering ourselves in glory on the sex frequency front, so I don't have any real hopes, anyway!

Hope all are well?