TTC after miscarriage thread #6

[jodiebee664]

New thread for all navigating the bewildering world of trying to conceive after a miscarriage. Whether you have dc or are ttc your first, all are welcome here. We share the positive, the negative and the down right confusing.

Here's link to previous thread...www.mumsnet.com/Talk/conception/2657346-TTC-after-miscarriage-thread-5?noti=1#62460035

Morning all. Littlepooch I'm with you in just feeling so desperately sad, having convinced myself I had moved on. Due date would have been 12 December and suddenly hearing about people's kids, seeing photos of friends babies all makes me feel utterly hopeless. I am beginning to feel that trying again, getting that BFP and actually getting to keep a baby is the only thing that will really help me to move on.

Sorry for being gloomy, argument with DH last night about life and being happy and just feeling bleurgh this morning.

Also, has anyone been taking their temp? I've just bought a BBT thermometer, as I read that ectopic pregnancy can be caused by low progesterone, which can show up as low or falling temperatures, so I'm hoping to keep track for when we start trying again.

Hi little I remember you too, glad to see you back. Sorry to hear about the BFN, has AF started for you now?

Welcome crusading but sorry you are here too. We must be at a similar point in our cycles, I'm 3dpo, hate the tww so much, it always seems to drag!

Flash I've been temping since my first mc. It's interesting and after 3 cycles of temping as starting to see some sort of pattern. I think I have low progesterone too as I have a lot of spotting early in my LP although interestingly my temp hasn't generally dropped much until AF actually starts.**

I've been temping since cycle 3. I like the data it gives though I'm not very accurate with it.

Fertility friend do a free charting course through their site and app, that's useful.

Hi everyone.

No sign of AF cramps have eased off so no idea what's going on. Tested again today and bfn (I know -I'm a glutton for punishment) so guess I'm having a slightly longer cycle this month. I hope she hurries up as once she arrives I'm fine, it's just this limbo bit I struggle with!

I temped when ttc my DD and found it really helpful. I still even now love going back and looking at my chart for the month we finally conceived her. Fertility friend was an excellent tool. I'm tempted to try it again but I'm trying to take a more relaxed approach this time round.....

Y87 - great to have a cycle buddy to help the 2ww fly by
I have a 2 day sales meeting next week and not sure how I am going to get through that without drinking without provoking questions
Sorry for those that have been visited by af

I did temp when conceiving dd but not sure how accurate they would be these days as I don't get the best sleep and I was in a rather neurotic place which I would rather not re-enter.
Saying that I guess I am working on my cycles been the same as before which potentially they may not be

Hello all. 10DPO here for me, finally caved in yesterday and POAS as have been having cramps and tender boobs, big fat negative, and the same again this morning although still have cramps. Cue a giant melt down from me. First month I've been able to try again since MMC in August, but I was secretly hopeful as I fell pregnant in the first month we tried last time. DH is away with work, he isn't very good at emotional support usually but surpassed himself yesterday by saying he wasn't going to speak to me as I was inconsolable, I should just pull myself together, then promptly hung up on me. Thanks.

Legend I am so with you on the anger, inside I'm in a rage, but like you littlepooch by the time it makes its way to the surface it just comes out as all encompassing sadness. It feels like my life has been on hold since the miscarriage and I don't think it'll start again until I'm pregnant again. I've been told by the Consultant I must hurry up and get on with it as I'm 40 now so time, and healthy eggs, are decreasing as we speak. Useful. DH works away 4 times a month so timing is very difficult, his next two trips are Miami and Singapore which are both still active with Zika.

I am seeing a councellor via the hospital which, apart from you lovely ladies is the only other person I can be really honest with, it does help. I've been back at the gym catching up on yoga and dragging myself out for long walks, reading lots but I'm spending far too much time on my own as we've recently moved to a new town and I'm not working. Was going to be signing up for all the NCT / baby stuff locally as was very rural previously so this has just added to my sense of limbo I think. I'm guessing I'd better find myself a new job ASAP.

Sorry, aware that was all very long, and very gloomy, just don't seem to be able to shake this off currently. AF is due in the next few days so probably feel better once that's under way and I can look forward. Hope you are all OK.

Hi legend and monkey (don't know how to highlight names!) I am sure we had a thread together after mmc in August. Hope you are doing OK. I'm ttc again, I'm about 12 days into this cycle, feeling good after a horrible time last month, convincing myself I was pregnant, spending a fortune on tests and just generally driving myself crazy- even though I've been so awful to my DH we had hardly had any sex anyway so it was quite unlikely! Hoping not to be as crazy this cycle

I'm pretty relaxed, I do temp to see what's happening, I don't obsess over it. It's just an interesting indicator IMO. Obviously everyone's different, though. I don't test now unless I'm really late or I want to know if I can drink or not.

Hi Sure, yes we did indeed, our thread was a real comfort back in August and it's good to see familiar names back on here and starting to TTC again, Legend too, and a few others I think. Hopefully none of us will be here too long.

I've calmed down a bit since my earlier rant, seem to be coping ok most of the time then it all catches up with me for a moment.

Am the same as you with the crazy cycle stress, god knows what going on here with me. BFN four times over the last few days, raging cramps all day yesterday and so bad last night I didn't really sleep. AF supposed to be due Thursday. Obviously convincing myself I'll get a late BFP but think that's just wishful thinking. It took 10 weeks to get my hcg down after my MMC so think I'm probably just a bit buggered up still. Really hope things are better for you this month.

I've ordered a thermometer to have a go at temping because obviously obsessively peeing on sticks is not enough.

Hello! Just popping in.

How is everyone getting on? Anyone is the 2ww?

AF turned up 2 days early last Friday. So cycles since MC have been 19, 35, 28, 26 days. Bit of a frustrating one but on to the next one we go... wondering if I can resist using OPKs and obsessively this tracking this month. It doesn't seem to be helping, so maybe a month not would be good. Bit difficult when a pack of 50 OPKs turned up yesterday

Hi just found this thread and I guess I'm one of you! My history is 2 early mc and currently 4 and a bit weeks with 3rd preg but found out I have autoimmune problems so on a concoction of drugs this time. This pregnancy is looking like it's going to be another failed one as test line has practically disappeared but I've not yet bled. Feeling like I've been hit by a bus not sure if it's the drugs or the pregnancy. I'm on pred, progesterone, clexane, asprin, thyroxine.

For those of you who have had an early mc on the anti clotting drugs was the bleed much worse? I think the only reason I've not bled is the progesterone tricking my body into thinking I'm pregnant.

Hi Jaffa sorry that you have found yourself on this thread. I've no experience with all the drugs, I've had one an-embryonic pg and cannot imagine what you've been through. So, nothing helpful to add except to welcome you to this sad thread

Jaffa i an colossally gutted for you. Just didn't want to post without mentioning that. You must be in utter turmoil so sending love x

Sure and Poozled - yes I remember you guys from that thread...the thread that basically kept my sanity together in the darkest of times. DP and I are attempting to be at it like rabbits but seem to be at it like sloths. DDs new trend of not sleeping at night now and DPs punishing new job is ensuring bed is for sleeping and not for recreation right now 😕

I keep forgetting to track. I'm on CD...15? Ish. I normally ovulate a bit later. Have ewcm. I have chapped lips which has been a sign of pregnancy for me, weirdly right from conception the last two mcs. But it is probably just because the outside temperature has dropped and the wind is up.

So that's me, anyway

Sorry to hear AF turned up early say. I keep telling myself if AF turns up this cycle then I don't have to have the awkwardness of hiding not drinking etc over Christmas, a small consolation but I'm clutching to it!

No advice for you Jaffa and can't imagine how you must be feeling, take care of yourself and I hope you have good support in RL but there is a lot of lovely support on this thread too.

I'm 8dpo think I'll most prob get a FRER and test on Friday so I can start on progesterone if I get a positive but not feeling particularly hopefully as have no symptoms. However I don't have any spotting yet which for me is a real positive even if it isn't because I'm pregnant perhaps my cycles are finally sorting themselves out! Have felt surprisingly relaxed this tww but think it's mainly as I've been so busy at work to even think about it!

How is everyone else getting on?

Driving myself mad in this 2ww I have no symptoms 9dpo so trying to told out till next week. Have been away with work and ended up been ill on Monday night so can't see a bean has stuck during that little episode!!!
Jaffa I am so sorry for what you are going through I have no words of advise sorry.
Y87 - I am totally with you on trying to find positive reasons for not been pregnant......... although I know it's a complete waste of time as will be totally upset when af arrives.
Good luck everyone x

Feeling downright peaky today so OF COURSE my mind is racing towards POAS.

I can't, and must wait until I've missed a period before getting up to all that malarkey 😔

Hi guys. Sorry I have been quiet for so long. I was struggling a bit with things and then DDog died and the next week I got told I will be made redundant in february. So I have been a bit down in the dumps. We were at an open day for fostering and adoption last week too. I don't think I am quite ready to commit to that yet - I think I still have some hope that not working will help. Roll on February when I at least get to take a breath.

Did you test today Mrsy?

Hi Brenna, lovely to see you back. Wish you weren't having such a sod of a time though. Sorry about your ddog

No news here. Hoping for a relaxing month, with lots of Christmas excitement! DD is nearly 3 so this is the first year she's really started to get an awareness of all the christmassy things I love Christmas, my family were never that arsed, but I like the family time. And the eating and drinking!

Here's hoping we get some sticky BFPs!

Ended up testing yesterday with the digi just couldn't help myself ridiculous really as I knew it would say not pregnant at 9dpo. got some FRERs today but think I'll most prob wait until Sunday if AF doesn't show as I don't feel remotely pregnant. Normally I start spotting around 8dpo and still none so even if I'm not pregnant that is at least something good this cycle!

Sorry to hear about your DDog Brenna, sounds like you've had a tough time recently

I love Christmas too say!

No need to wait until tomorrow AF started this morning so it's on to cycle 10 we go feeling pretty low as when we started ttc I really expected to be pregnant or even have had a baby by the end of the year and all that's happened this year is 2 mc. I know I'm so lucky to already have DD but Im really starting to feel like we'll never going to have the big family we want. Hoping 2017 will bring some good news.

Sorry for the negative post, hope everyone is doing ok and has nice weekends planned

That's rubbish MrsY. I can understand why you need to vent. When we started to TTC in May, me and DH talked a lot about 'when we have 2'. Now neither of us makes those comments and we're both wondering 'if' we'll have 2. I feel blessed to have DD but don't believe already having a child makes it easier.

Realised the other day that Ovia is saying next AF is due on XMas eve. I think it may be the one month I don't test early. What a bitch of a day for it to turn up! one more reason to drink through the festivities though

Sorry you're having a crappy time Mrs, it hits us all now and then - that's what we're here for so never feel like you can't come on here and have a moan,

I'm due on Christmas Day and I am dreading it. Even if I get a BFP that day I wouldn't want to tell anyone, as my MIL will still be in hospital I just think this Xmas will be horrid. Maybe I will actually be able to wait until 12 weeks.... anyway silly to even think about since it's not likely to happen.