The BESH are cheating on Luck with Irony, all Hags aboard for the ironiclusterdiff of the decade (for the B's and the none B's!)

[Blue2014]

You know the drill by now ...

Rules of Entry - must be over 30, TTC no. 1 for over a year, be suitably evil and Hag like, willing to shout Cunt at the moon on regular occasions, consume extra gin when our fellow hags are unable to, and to get the nipple tassles out for any successful Hag ...

No admittance without a complete BESHtionnaire - see below.

Hello BESH! Remember me? I joined in for about 2 days about 2 months ago then went AWOL from mn for a while due to family trauma. I've been back on the shaggers thread for a while as I've been posting on there for a year now but was hesitant to come back on here having picked you up then dropped you with no explanation (I don't ring, I don't write, etc. etc.).

Anyway, just wanted to stop by to say hi! Hope all are ok and still persevering with the shit storm that is ttc. I know some of you are going through IVF which i'm clueless about and terrified of so best of luck. Still thinking of you.

Hello Hags, Lurky McLurkster here, popping a nosey nose round the door to give support, hold onto toes and generally scold Mr Hags.

First things first, go go IVRs (sung to the tune of Power Rangers)! I'm wishing all the very best for you both Rain and Barking. COW!!!!!!

On to Mr BESHes inability to support and stop drinking for a month grrrrrrrrr this is one of my major bugbears. And what's really fucking annoying is consultants who don't care about anything apart from their biology bit and don't check things like smoking and drinking. A friend of mine had about 5 rounds of IVF before they realised that her husband was a raging alcoholic and told her that unless he stopped drinking she would continue to miscarry. It took them THAT long to realise ffs! Anyway, speak to any nutritionist and they will tell you that alcohol has an effect and here are a couple of articles that might help. www.drinkaware.co.uk/check-the-facts/health-effects-of-alcohol/fertility-and-pregnancy/is-alcohol-harming-your-fertility

www.theguardian.com/science/2014/oct/03/bmj-open-sperm-quality-alcohol-five-units-study-semen

All that said please feel free to have a stern word with your men as they really need to get it into their heads. This is important. You don't get pregnant on your own. The baby you make will be the product of you both. The job they have to do is produce decent jizz. Everything else is up to you (feel free to list all the drugs you have to take, how many injections, pills etc as evidence - this is a good exercise in understanding!) so the least they can do is do their very best to produce top quality jizz whilst you do your very best to do the rest. And with all the shiz you have to do that affects your body both physically and emotionally the least support they can give is to stand up to their pals and say no I'm not drinking at the moment I'm supporting my wife through IVF/on a diet/on a health kick/use any excuse under the sun and man up. It's not forever!!

Ooo, did it all come good for rasp in the end after she was worried it was all not happening? Haven't been on the book of face recently.

Arse - just checked my facts and it's not quite the done deal but should be in a couple of weeks. Will keep shtum til all is done and dusted though.

How's it going barking? Anyone else?

(Tumbleweed)

I've got nothing to say and I'm feeling a bit down in general hence the tumble weed. We need a new recruit of Hags, we are all getting quiet in our old Hag age

Gin, blue? Anything you want to talk about?

God I'm such a shite ESH Sorry for the absence, again. Life just keeps on getting in the way of important MN time .

Not much to report here, second round of blood tests done and a cervical swab booked for next week. After that it's just wait and see for my referral appointment.

Rain I remember having "the chat" with my boss, I'm also a horrible cryer and bless him as a then 69 year old bloke he didn't know what to do! Thankfully my current boss is a woman in her 40s and she told me her SIL has been through IVF so she's much more understanding. I haven't told them we're back on the TTC wagon yet but think I might have to if my appointments fall on work days.

Hope everyone else is doing ok.

Wowsers Barking I am keeping everything crossable appendage crossed for you for tomorrow.

Just had a v quick lurk for first time in ages and it seems like things are a go go for you and Rain. You hags deserve to have a double diff on this fred. Wishing you so much luck

I don't have enough time to catch up properly with everyone as I need to get to sleep ahead of the numerous nightly demands of Fanklet. Lobbing buckets of fish at all of you.

Night night

Hi coop, embryo transfer is tomorrow! Fingers crossed it survives the defrost. Did my first fragmin injection tonight. Bloody horrible blunt needle, hands were shaking I was pushing so hard to try and pierce the skin!! Far worse than any of the injections I've had to do so far (4 different types at last count). Missing DCW. He's been out of contact since last Friday when they headed into the mountains, potentially won't be able to contact or hear from him for another 2 weeks or more...

Blue rant it all out .

cave fingers crossed you're not waiting too long for your appointment.

How are you doing coop?

Ugh the dreaded blood thinner Barking. My top tip for that one is to stab as quickly and firmly as possible then inject as slowly as possible. This seems to be the best way to prevent bruising in my experience. The bastard needles are fatter than all the others and quite often blunt so hard and fast is the rule! Let the good times role eh?? Wishing you all the ESHly best for thawing!

They've taken the embryo out of the freezer, they'll call in an hour to let me know if it's okay. They said odds of embryo survival were 70-80 % and were they okay to take the other one out if necessary?
Provisionally booked in for the transfer at 12.40.

The embryo didn't make it. In my head I'm trying to stop myself using the word 'died'.

The second (final) embryo has been taken out and is okay to go in. She said I should take the progesterone 4 hours before transfer. I pointed out that transfer is in 3 hours. So she said bring it with me and put it in straight after. I might ask for a second opinion when I get to the hospital.

Well, if nothing else I know that I won't be going straight into the next frozen cycle if this one fails...

Fuck. Could really do with DH being here right now. Trying to control the tears because it's Thursday so the cleaner is here... Not succeeding very well.

Oh barking, that is a blow but remember one is all you need. Go little embie! Sending you lots of ESH-ly shoulder rubs and Icefish of Implantation.

I start stabbing tonight, had some mega weird dreams last night!!

blue do offload on us if it helps?

cave glad you're making steady, if slow, progress. My boss had some issues with conceiving their second child so he was pretty sympathetic, plus he's generally just a decent guy. Easy to forget that tho when you're panicking beforehand!!

It really IS quiet in here, but that's ok. Sometimes it's good to talk, sometimes it isn't. I hope everyone is well, lively to hear from some of our PESH & CRESH!

Oh barking - what a day for you. Maybe get in the car and have a cry? It's what I often do. Sorry DH is off the radar today, you are a nails Hag. I am handing you a whole haul of fish

Im alright Hags, it's nothing big, just niggles (and the fact that I have no real Ttc updates) day 2 bloods AGAIN tomorrow. Spaff test AGAIN Tuesday, booked to see a spaff expert privately in September. Still considering the Czech route

Not good news. I took one look at the photo of the embryo and my heart sank. It hasn't even expanded. I said that it didn't look as good as the last one and the embryologist said no, it isn't. On the notes she'd written 'poor'. She said it had suffered from the freeze but there was a chance it would continue to expand. She didn't look very hopeful. The nurse asked if I wanted the photo and I said no. It then fell out of my notes onto the floor and she stood on it. I burst into tears . Why the fuck did I think it was a good idea to do this on my own?
On a positive note I asked for gas and air and I got it .

Oh fuck Barking, I'm so sorry you are going through this. It's so fucking unfair. Am virtually by your side hoping for the best outcome with my trawl of wet fish.

You mentioned before that you plans whilst he's away, are they still in place?

Oh Barking I'm sorry you're having to deal with this all on your own. I know it's easy to assume the worst but it really does only take one - IOTO became a real mantra for the last crop of IVFers. I think it was dear Euro who had only one "poor" embryo for her transfer, and that little blob has just turned one!

Thanks cave, currently swinging between attempting positive visualisations, and wanting to prepare myself for the worst. This is it, the end of the nhs funded support.
Can't help but think that two years ago this was a week before finding out I was pregnant the first time. If this works, the edd would be within a few days of my first. Weird.

Blue off to a festival tomorrow, need to go pack now but I'm shattered in that way that only a lack of sleep followed by an emotional day and lots of crying can hit you...
Oh, but festival is not with friends, it's me giving my mum a break by taking my two little brothers away for three days...

barking, so sorry you've had such a shit of a day, and on your own - cod of comfort and hake of hope for you. It really does only take one though. Fingers and toes are crossed for you hag

Ooof! You are nails, although at least 2 brothers will keep you busy!

Oh Barking you luffly, hard as nails hag. Sending a pufferfish of positivity and a hairyfish of hope. These are actual fish. I checked and everything.

It can and does happen...when you've all but given up. And the universe can throw up very strange coincidences like dates etc. Fanklet was born exactly 3 years to the date since my miscarriage. Same date. You couldn't make it up. I spent 2 years hating that date and feeling very low leading up to it. Now it will be celebrated forevermore.

I hope the universe grants you the luck you so deserve this time. I know we are all cheering on this little embie.

Said my bit on FB barking - just to add that I hope you have a fun weekend with your bros and to send you a soothing shoal of slippery dicks (now my favourite fish name ever!).

Did my first injection this eve, was totally fine although was a bit of a faff getting all the air out of the needle. Stung a little bit afterwards but I think I'll live! I've set up a recurring reminder in my phone (that also tells me which side to do each day). Hopefully no one will see it left open as it just says 'stabbing'

Barking, I am thinking of you and cheering on your embie!

IOTO!

I got my shit together (just enough) to arrange more sophisticated testing to find out if there are any reasons for rmc. Don't ask me exactly what we are getting tested for because I sort of zoned out. We should know more in a few weeks.

I realised that it is the fear of miscarrying again that was paralysing me. So baby steps: more thorough tests (the "standard" ones came back clear) and depending on the results then we can start thinking about IVF in the autumn or beginning of next year.

Best luck for everyone!!

Well done on the getting together of the shit Erica, it's good to have you back on board.

Well I'm booked in for a HSG later this month which means we aren't allowed to have sex this month. This is an odd way of trying to make a baby ....