The BESH are cheating on Luck with Irony, all Hags aboard for the ironiclusterdiff of the decade (for the B's and the none B's!)

[Blue2014]

You know the drill by now ...

Rules of Entry - must be over 30, TTC no. 1 for over a year, be suitably evil and Hag like, willing to shout Cunt at the moon on regular occasions, consume extra gin when our fellow hags are unable to, and to get the nipple tassles out for any successful Hag ...

No admittance without a complete BESHtionnaire - see below.

OTD Saturday. Prosecco Saturday night if it's a bfn and a long bike ride Sunday....

10dpo today. tick tock tick tock......

Am also on the symptom spotting mental bandwagon. Day 15 today, no red tide, woke up with twingey tits, bowels are a mess and if I think about it, I might feel sick. But I'm stuck on a peninsula somewhere in Greece with iceman and his 2 kids, refused to pack the pisssticks and don't fly home til Saturday. Refusing to talk to iceman about it as we've gone through all this before only to have a period on day 16 or something like that.

keep having to check my thoughts whenever they run too much along the "is it" track. Got my fingers firmly crossed though that my consultant/surgeon is a fertility Midas. But working on assumption it isn't and so fuck it will have my evening half a lager. On holiday and this is all in my head.

Read through all the posts I missed - dropped off the email list again, sort it out mumsnet - it all just takes so long.

Re the St upid men not pulling their weight - I keep getting told "the amount of grief you've put me through" Aka a couple of high-pressured ovulatory shags and having to do a spaff test (which he did at home and I drove to clinic because he "couldn't" possibly jack one off there). Countless dildo cam sessions, drugs, an operation and basically emptying my ISA to date count for shit compared to that! Nob.

Sorry, I can't remember where you're up to Icy, have you had a round of ivf or are you not one of us 'infertile' types so still have hopes for getting pg through shagging?

Not listening to you Erica, I've packed the piss sticks.... Probably going to pimp tomorrow morning. I feel physically sick with nerves, I'm not sleeping and I'm utterly miserable. How much worse could a bfn be than the anticipation of one? I'd least I'd then know whether we really are at the end of the NHS road (only took 44 months....) and if we carry on we need to go private.

Barking I totally understand. I am the same. Can you manage to wait till Friday, though? I hope you get a HUGE BFP tomorrow but should there be a BFN, won't it elongate the agony thinking "... maybe it is just early?"

Remember Fab's late BFP!

Pcos and endometriosis barking - had an operation to fix it. Hasn't worked this month, period just showed up en route to evening beer. Idiot for even hoping to be honest.

Ah sorry to hear it Icy. It's sad that we end up feeling daft that we ever dared hope we were pregnant!

Sorry barking, I'm with Erica. Fabs late BFP completely changed my views on early testing, if I ever have the (bloody) need to test, I would wait as late as possible,but then I'm pretty good at avoiding issues I do get it though, my crazy dwarves and I are slapping fish around for you in hope and encouragement

Quick weep on the shower, punch the wall, blow nose, back on form. Can't believe I'm back at this stage - before the operation I was resigned to being a BESH so just took a period in my stride. This fucking hope-lifting operation alias stripped away all my defences and now I'm a weakling again. FUUUUUCK. Had a row with mr ice over dinner. His kids scarpered "can we go for a wander". Took all my being not to shout "YES! FUCK OFF! ALL OF YOU!"

it's just inescapably shit isn't it. You're not a weakling tho. BESH might be nails, but that doesn't mean we don't suffer each time we get knocked down. It does however mean that we are experts at picking each other back up, dusting ourselves down and yelling CUNT at the motherfucking universe and our shitty, shitty luck. I hope you can enjoy the end of your hols - have an extra humongous g&t or five and a whole trawlerful of eels of endurance.

barking will be here for you tomoz. About fucking time we had a turn in our luck in these parts. Pollocks of positivity and positive piss sticks for you!

Sorry the witch got you Icy .

Erica/blue I got a bfp last time at 12dpo, and I have a whole bag of piss sticks that go out of date in September sob so I can keep pimping until the blood test on Saturday gives the final result anyway. I pimped early last time and got a bfn but still didn't totally believe it until the otd so I honestly don't think it can make me feel any worse.... And you never know, it might be good news .

I feel like using one of the many piss sticks about to go out of date tonight, as they're only going in the bin anyway....

And that was a bfn. Obviously.
You don't need to say it...

And another bfn this morning.

Not caught up properly but sorry barking
It isn't over til it's over though...

barking I say use up all those piss sticks. If it's positive you can be one of those internet nobs who has the strengthening line over a load of sticks! If it's not then don't buy any more.

I've told myself I'm never going to suffer another negative result, so I'll piss only when it's days and days late. Even then it'll probably be negative, but cross that bridge.

I remember when I used to go to boots and buy branded piss sticks! Oh, the naivety. Silly bitch.

Sorry Barking. 12 dpo is a bit early though, I always got faint-ish lines on day 15dpo. But yes, not what you want to see and specially with DWC being away. Cockles of confort for you and crossing my fingers we get repeat of what happened to Fab.

Icy You are not weak. It is just really fucking hard.

Ah barking. Just what the other Hags said really. I'm sorry this is shitty right now.

I've got the same piss stick I've had for the last year. I realise my regular cycles are a blessing but they also mean I've only ever needed to test 2x in the 3 years of trying!

what a load of shit. Really sorry barking. Hope you get through today ok.

Oh, barking - I'm so sorry. This is so shit.

Sneaky ((((((hugs)))))) for you, barking. Have you got someone with you tonight? I don't want to fuel any menkul but you aren't out of the game yet. My bfp was very faint at 16dpo and if I'd tested early I swear it wouldn't have been there. Have a sole of solidarity and a bucket of prawns.

Hags, how many times?! Get the fucking prawns away from me
I'll take all the monster munch though .

Save the gin for me for Saturday .

I'm staying with a friend tonight. I didn't say I'd had a bfn this morning but he knows about the ivf and I basically referred to it in the past tense, but said I had to keep taking the injections until the blood test.
His 3 year old daughter who currently won't go to bed wouldn't be here without a private clinic that specialised in immunology, as his ex wife had a still birth followed by mc, so for a bloke he has a lot more understanding than most would!!

It's good to have people round who get it

Thinking of you Barking!!

Still bfn.

Ah fuck barking, and I assume you've not been sleeping well from your post time either ()

sleep? what the fuck is that?

Thought as much