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ttc after mc- the best shit place to be! #3

999 replies

northdownmummy · 05/01/2015 19:27

looking forward to new beginnings in the new year

OP posts:
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6
epskie · 07/01/2015 10:28

Hi teenie I'm glad your ordeal is comin to an end but that's horrible for you to go through :-( the doctor taped my scan photo into my file in front of me and I hated looking at it.
I've just taken my fifth dose of misoprostol and only have one more to go. Although I'm still bleeding its quite watery (sorry tmi) so I'm panicking that the tablets aren't working :-(
Xx

TeenieDeenie · 07/01/2015 10:45

I'd imagine it depends how much is still to pass epskie if it's just a little then maybe you won't have too much bleeding, fingers crossed... Did they give you an indication at the scan? Do you have to go back for another one to check everything is gone? I'm so sorry it's dragging on for you, I know only too well the feeling of just wanting the physical side of things to be over so you can work on healing emotionally. Hugs Xx

StockingFullOfCoal · 07/01/2015 10:50

I just feel awful for DH. This was the third baby he's lost (his eldest sons mother had a termination 6 months after he was born, told DH she was pregnant then had the termination two days later without even discussing it with him Sad ) No judgment on her but it makes me sad for DH.

My first AF was 31 days after the MC started.

You're all so brave to continue after multiple MCs, and after the appalling way most of you have been treated during, the NHS is a wonderful thing but they are sorely lacking in MC care. A friend of mine was kept in a ward for 9 days repeatedly given the meds to make her womb expel the 10 week baby but they weren't working and they told her it was her fault Angry and eventually had ERPC on the 11th day. That was her 6th MC too. She had a total of 8 MCs between her first DD and second DD, lost a fallopian tube to an ectopic and Doctors say she wouldn't carry another one to full term. Her youngest is almost 1 now Grin

Brummiegirl15 · 07/01/2015 11:27

In my last 2 mc's my AF was late but late for me as I have really short cycles (23 days etc) so after mc 1 it was 28 days on the nose and mc 2 - 27 days

After number 3 I am currently in the WTF cycle.

But after a tough, sad night I've woken up this morning to my consultant letter dropping through the door.

Not until 23rd Feb but that's ok as EPU said when I get my bloods done it can take nearly 4 weeks to come back and there's not a lot of point having the appointment with consultant if he has no idea what my bloods will say!

Feeling a bit more positive today - give it time, I'm sure a baby bomb will knock me off my feet - but a glimmer of hope in the distance

Metalhead · 07/01/2015 12:14

bummie I won't lie, when my last chance of getting pregnant before my due date had gone I felt really low. However the actual day itself was fine, I think I'd already moved on by then. You will get through it, but it is tough. Good luck with your consultant appointment, I hope you'll get some answers!

I'm getting closer to the date of my mmc now in February and I'm still not pregnant again, not sure what that's gonna do to me... I think I've given up a bit already.

Metalhead · 07/01/2015 12:15

Oops, sorry about that misspelling there in your name... Blush

Gr33dyeggs · 07/01/2015 16:50

Struggling to follow thread atm but to someone who asked time for first AF. It was around 6 weeks first time and exactly 4 weeks to the actual mc date this time.

My 2nd AF is currently awful. Flooding which I have never before had other than during actual mc. Think my body is broken Sad

mollym14 · 07/01/2015 17:02

brummie so so sorry to hear your news. I had been lurking on the July threads before my mc and it's just so sad to hear about yet another mc for you. Hopefully the consultant will do everything possible to find out why and do all possible to help.

epskie I also mc'd on Christmas day (at least that's when the main event happened (Worst. Christmas. Ever.)) but it sounds like I had a much easier aftermath than you since I had passed everything by the 29th December. Hope you get sorted physically soon.

DH and I are going to try going for it in the WTF cycle, chances are slim I know but we can but hope...

Treaclepie19 · 07/01/2015 17:52

Brummie I can relate to having to get up because of the thoughts.
While miscarrying and for a while after I just gave up on night time. I'd just go to bed with dh and then sit and watch TV in bed all night.

Xmas eve... I just distracted myself a lot to be honest. I had less tears than I've had on spontaneous days. I did get upset when we did a toast to remember our baby.
I think I've just given up to be honest although I have made peace with it all much more than I had a few months ago.
I'm just hoping a new year is a new start.

maverick79 · 07/01/2015 21:00

Hi, am new to mumsnet, struggling today as I received email from SMA reminding me I should be 32 weeks today, didn't even register with them! Found your conversation resonated with me especially the lady who couldn't sleep, when googling during a similar night after m/c i found a book that really helped called knocked up, knocked down written by a brave lady about her experiences.

mrsdiddlydoo · 07/01/2015 22:05

Hi ... Marking my place. Hope everyone is bimbling along ok.

brummie I can totally relate to feeling worse at night. I always manage to keep busy during the day, but nights are the hardest. They are long. And lonely when you can't sleep and your mind runs away with you. I had expected to be 12wks pregnant on the due date of my 1st mc. But 2nd mc happened a few days before. I mainly felt numb. Shocked. A failure. Stupid eh. But all in all, it was ok. As ok as it could be. I didn't cry a lot.

Hi maverick haven't heard of that book. Will check it out. Big welcome to mumsnet. Hope you are doing ok. I'm sorry you find yourself here.

gr33dy I had flooding for 2nd AF after my first mc. It got better as more AF passed. Looking back I wonder if it was just my body's way of getting rid of more. I had been warned that AF might be heavier post mc but it was horrible. A cruel reminder.

Should have ov by now but opk keeps saying no. Have worn dh out trying though just in case. Feeling some ov pain now but doubt either of us can manage it again. Oh how I wish it felt less chore like!! Really struggling.

Allthefours · 08/01/2015 06:15

Apologies in advance....

Today is my due date.

I had really hoped that I would be pregnant again by now, but 6 months after losing my baby, I've lost another and am as far away from being pregnant as can be. AF is out staying her welcome and I have a shitty day at work ahead.

Miscarriage is the most unbelievably crappy situation in the world. Aside from DH, there is no one in my life that will understand my emotions today.

northdownmummy · 08/01/2015 08:44

allthefours I've no wise words but just wanted to let you know that I'll be thinking of you.

OP posts:
Brummiegirl15 · 08/01/2015 08:53

allthefours

I'm so sorry. I'm dreading my due date too on 27th Jan so you have all my love and thoughts Flowers

xx

ReverseTheTrend · 08/01/2015 08:59

Would it be ok to join?

I had a mc a week before christmas, should have been 11 weeks and was first pregnancy. Started bleeding at work, called EPU and was given a scan appointment for 48 hours later.

However later that night I bled so heavily DH insisted we went to A&E, good job too as BP was scarily high. Scan there they thought all tissue had gone, bleeding slowed and I went home.

A few days later bleeding had almost stopped, then out of nowhere I passed the sac. We buried it in the garden and said goodbye, had no idea what else to do.

Not back at work yet can't face it. DH squeezed my hand last night, and because it was the first time he had done that since the scan it triggered such powerful grief.

The hospital advised me to wait 3 cycles to TTC but queried this with GP who said once i had a BFN could start again straight away, so am now TTC again.

We had a scan at 7 weeks that showed baby was fine, but now I can't find the scan photo anywhere and it is breaking my heart.

epskie · 08/01/2015 09:29

Hi, me again. Can any body tell me the symptoms of an infection post mc please? Thanks x

DoctorDonnaNoble · 08/01/2015 09:36

Just popping in again, unlikely to be any change in my situation this month. With everything that's been going on we only managed to DTD once. AF due tomorrow and then hopefully can get started again. It's been over a year since my MMC and nothing. Hmm

GuybrushThreepwoodMP · 08/01/2015 10:30

epskie if you are worked, you need to go straight to epu. This has been going on so long for you now. Did the medication have any effect?

Usual signs of infection would be things like a temperature, bad smelling discharge, strange colour, general ill feeling. But anything else really so please go and get seen. Thinking of you.

northdownmummy · 08/01/2015 11:15

reverse so sorry you find yourself here. I got a lot of super from these ladies in the early days, hope you do too.

I'm sure the hospital/clinic would be able to give you a copy of the scan photo from your notes.

OP posts:
Bumblepops19 · 08/01/2015 11:46

Hiya me again,

Brain isn't working and can't find the post about how you coped with due dates. After first mc on due date I released a balloon and lit a candle for a few hours. I felt strangely peaceful all day ( me and partner at time had split up) 4 years later with not talking to him and he recently got in contact to say that he wishes he'd talked about it all instead of walking away and he had done the same thing on beans due date so that settled some negative thoughts towards him!

I should be having my 16 week scan this week and I keep seeing lots of people with baby bumps and have to force my self not to go over and ask to touch it! I think DP would have a fit if I was arrested for being a loon!! Haha

Thankyou all for all your support, I'm sorry to see we have new members but the ladies on here are super and offer lots of great advice x

SashaKerr · 08/01/2015 13:25

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Treaclepie19 · 08/01/2015 20:52

Thinking of you allthefours. Nothing can make today any easier, look after yourself xxx

Gr33dyeggs · 09/01/2015 07:11

reverse and maverick sorry you find yourselves joining here Sad
alltthe4 I was thinking of you yesterday. I hope you're doing ok.
epskie have you seen anyone about possible infection?
It looks like we're all struggling for some positivity atm.
As my 2nd AF is leaving, and glad to see the back of it (thanks mrsdiddlydoo for sharing you had flooding too) but I can feel myself getting anxious now that we might not catch next time.

DoctorDonnaNoble · 09/01/2015 07:22

AF due today. Hope it hurries up. I hate the limbo around the date. Every hour it doesn't show you find yourself getting more helpful no matter how unlikely it is!

Treaclepie19 · 09/01/2015 07:32

Just wanted to let you all know i got my bfp this morning. I'm soo excited but very nervous too xxx

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