On The 12th Day of Xmas My Viroids Gave To Me 12 OPKs 11 New Positions 10 Symptom Spots 9 Pics Of Cats 8 TMI's 7 Shag Stories 6 Cervix Positions 5 Temp Charts 4 Hooyas 3 DPO 2 Gx and an Xmas BFP!JS 35

[jellypi3]

Ladies, Fred title says it all; we are the ones who shag as much as our men can cope with in order to get upduffed without the stress of scientific whatnots!

Fred rules (copied and adapted from previous Fred)

1. Thou shalt shag as much as humanly possible in order to get upduffed.
2. Thou shalt not partake of OPKs, temping, or charting.
3. Thou shalt keep symptom spotting to a minimum.
4. Thou shalt share with your fredmates where needed.

JSing lingo

ERTD = Evil Red Tide of Dooooooommmmmmm. Or AF to most others. Also know as 'the witch', 'bitch witch' and 'that one with the red shiny convertible'

Viroid = This is you, dear poster. This is from the first JS thread when someone tried to type 'ladies' and it autocorrected to 'Viroids' - so there you go!

Pant snot = Egg white cervical mucus.

Doing a kitten = Getting upduffed soon after joining (warning: may induce envy in other posters).

POAS = Pee On A Stick (of the pregnancy detecting kind, not from a tree). Also known as PIAR (Pee In A Ramekin - cos we're posh birds innit). Or PIATLH (Tea light holder) PIAWG (Wine glass) or anything else you care to pee in! PONF = Pee on Nigel Farage. Self explanatory, who wouldn't?

ROC - Receptacle of Choice - what one chooses to use for the task of POAS. Option decorations include photographs of political leaders.

JIAC = Jizz in a Cup. Preferable to jizz on the carpet or jizz in the eye. This one's for the lucky men in our lives.

Shagging like something = JSing like a teenage nymphomaniac.

Giving a hooya = Giving a much needed slap to a fellow poster in danger of slipping into ttc obsession. Warning - this may happen to you if you start trying to POAS at 5dpo. PUT. THE. PISSY. STICK. DOWN. IT'S TOO EARLY!

Contraband = Of COURSE none of us EVER partake of any silly OPKs or temp charting. They are Contraband.

Icing = ovulating. Another autocorrect development!

Getting your Cape on = planning some serious pouncing on DH/DP

TWOT - Two Weeks of Torture. AKA Schroedinging!
TWPU - Two Week Piss Up!

Keeping your gingers = fingers crossed, yet another autocorrect development! Shortened to 'gx'

Doing A lemon = Testing WAAAAAAAY to early!

The link to Part 33 is here

The current Grads Fred is here

The rather nobbish article in which we became a little bit notorious is here. We are the dark side of MN. Welcome.

Happy Christmas shagging, shaggers!

Stats!!!

Name: Jelly
Age: 24
TTC: Since Aug 2014
DC's: None, just some stinky cats!

Ahh I fucked up the post, Link to Part 34 is here:

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/conception/2245840-Dear-Santa-weve-been-a-bit-naughty-in-all-the-right-ways-given-our-husbands-plenty-of-lays-we-dont-need-presents-under-our-trees-wed-all-be-happy-to-get-BFPs-Love-the-Viroids-JSing-34?msgid=51165296#51165296

Link to Grad Fred is here:

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/antenatal_clubs/2243337-Hop-aboard-the-good-ship-JS-Grads-for-its-sweet-16th-pregnancy-party-Don-your-party-hats-grab-a-bouncy-ball-and-quaff-copious-amounts-of-raspberry-leaf-to-celebrate-our-coming-of-age

jelly I lurves the new Fred title!! You've done a super job lady!

Name: Indigo
Age: 29
TTC: July 2014
DC's: currently baking something the size of a poppy seed..

Name: Honey
Age: 28
TTC: Aug 14, mc Sept 14
DC: none

Great title Jelly!

Name: gaggia
Age: 32
DC: 3yo DD mc Oct 2014
TTC: July 2014

Name: lil
Age: 29
TTC: 2yrs 1m
DCs: None but starting first ivf icsi cycle on 28th December. Bfp due February

Name: JC or candy
Age: 30
TTC: Aug 14, mc Nov 14
DCs: none, just two furry pigs that are extremely squeaky this evening

Name: KH
Age: 34
TTC: Aug 14
DCs: none, 2DSDs and a husband! lol
currently in CD18 and think I've finally iced and entering the twot zone!

great job jelly fab title!! right am off to try and fill the old Fred xx

Name: La
Age: 34
TTC: since July 2013, mc Sept 2014
DCs: currently incubating kidney bean sized DC1. Plus two ginger fluffballs

Lurking - marking place!

I'm not incubating the fluffballs by the way...

I'd love to be incubating fluff balls!!!

Oh boy that was so embrarrasing, Tesco delivery driver just arrived with weekly shopping, I bought a FRER for safe keeping (for when I really need one).

Turns up, 1 substitution on the fecking list, and it was the pregnancy test. So this old man turns round to me and says "Your pregnancy test has been swapped for a digital one, that's lucky!".......

Cringe

Name: batfish
Age: 33
TTC: Since Nov 14
DCs: Zero!

Haha jelly you poor thing - the man had some balls commenting on it!

Excellent title Jelly! Not that lucky on the sub though - digis are waaaay less sensitive than FRERs.

Name: Pisghetti
Age: 34
TTC: June 2014
DCs: 13 yr old DS, incubating a swede (fluffy bits are on the outside only - thanks hormones!)

Old fred full now!! :D

Name: Ainat
Age: 27
TTC: August 14
DCs: None. One fur baby in the form of a Jack Russell.

Great title jelly!

Name: dulcetmoans
Age: 29
TTC: March 2012
DC: none but hopeful for current pg belly

Back from Belgium trip. Lovely place but less Christmas market than I was expecting. All about chocolate, chops, waffles and beer though. What a place!

jelly our dear lemon said boots are doing BOGOF FRERs and I I bought some! one of which I used for my BFP. It means you get 4 for about a tenner if the deals still on!

dulcet you should have gone to see chat!

good job la. you do like getting the last word don't u!

Mmm waffles!!!!

Love the fred title hope I never have to do it as I don't know how!
Name Purplecircle
Age 40
DC none, mc July 14
Ttc since Jan 14

Currently twotting with lots of symptoms

Thank you viroids for your posts towards of the last Fred.

I'm still not sure on how to react to the news that there is a strong chance I have PCOS. I feel more able to post a longer post than I did last night though.

Tink I'm not sure what my progesterone result was. She told me she wasn't too worried by my hormone results other than LH being slightly high and testosterone being too high. As for actual numbers of anything I'm not sure what they were. She showed me them on screen and I meant to ask for a print out as I know some of the lovely ladies on here could have helped me with the numbers, but I was focusing on not crying in the doctors and forgot...

How can I check if I am icing?

I haven't been doing OPKs regularly - but when I have used them (ICs) I have always got a negative result. Mostly they are completely blank (other than control line), but I did get faint second lines a while ago now. I also had ewcm around the same time. I'm hoping that's a positive sign. But that was like a month ago or so now anyway. I also had that short light bleed on 17th/18th Nov.

As for other symptoms the only real one I have is my weight. I really struggle to lose weight - It seems that despite eating relatively healthily and trying to exercise I can't seem to lose anything. When I'm being extremely strict I drop a couple of pounds, but I can't keep up the extremely strict-ness all the time. I'm rubbish. The doctor suggested ensuring that I am eating a lot of low GI foods, so I need to go and research this. I already eat things like wholemeal bread, wholemeal pasta, etc. but I still eat what I'm guessing is too much of things like breads, pastas, rice, etc.

I should be getting a date for an ultrasound scan in the post.

Oh, and the doctor also suggested that I start taking metformin. Starting at one 500mg tablet a day for the first week, 2 tablets a day the second week, and 3 a day from the third week onwards.

We've had friends staying this weekend - including a 3 year old. I found that particularly hard to deal with. Especially DH being around her. In my head I had it that we're never going to have kids, and seeing him playing with her just made me cry. Possible overreaction I admit but I couldn't help it.

Name:Wil
Lurking mostly whilst incubating a wriggly cantaloupe.