The home of sporn lovers and cunthawks; make sure the ewcm is coming from the right hole and don your capes (but don't put parsley up your chuff!) ... for JUST SHAGGING Part 33

[mountaingirl01]

Ladies, Fred title says it all; we are the ones who shag as much as our men can cope with in order to get upduffed without the stress of scientific whatnots!

Fred rules (copied and adapted from previous Fred)

1. Thou shalt shag as much as humanly possible in order to get upduffed.
2. Thou shalt not partake of OPKs, temping, or charting.
3. Thou shalt keep symptom spotting to a minimum.
4. Thou shalt share with your fredmates where needed.

JSing lingo

ERTD = Evil Red Tide of Dooooooommmmmmm. Or AF to most others. Also know as 'the witch', 'bitch witch' and 'that one with the red shiny convertible'

Viroid = This is you, dear poster. This is from the first JS thread when someone tried to type 'ladies' and it autocorrected to 'Viroids' - so there you go!

Pant snot = Egg white cervical mucus.

Doing a kitten = Getting upduffed soon after joining (warning: may induce envy in other posters).

POAS = Pee On A Stick (of the pregnancy detecting kind, not from a tree). Also known as PIAR (Pee In A Ramekin - cos we're posh birds innit). Or PIATLH (Tea light holder) PIAWG (Wine glass) or anything else you care to pee in! PONF = Pee on Nigel Farage. Self explanatory, who wouldn't? 

ROC - Receptacle of Choice - what one chooses to use for the task of POAS. Option decorations include photographs of political leaders.

JIAC = Jizz in a Cup. Preferable to jizz on the carpet or jizz in the eye. This one's for the lucky men in our lives.

Shagging like something = JSing like a teenage nymphomaniac.

Giving a hooya = Giving a much needed slap to a fellow poster in danger of slipping into ttc obsession. Warning - this may happen to you if you start trying to POAS at 5dpo. PUT. THE. PISSY. STICK. DOWN. IT'S TOO EARLY!

Contraband = Of COURSE none of us EVER partake of any silly OPKs or temp charting. They are Contraband.

Icing = ovulating. Another autocorrect development!

Getting your Cape on = planning some serious pouncing on DH/DP

TWOT - Two Weeks of Torture. AKA Schroedinging!
TWPU - Two Week Piss Up!

Keeping your gingers = fingers crossed, yet another autocorrect development! Shortened to 'gx'

The link to Part 31 is here

The current Grads Fred is here

The rather nobbish article in which we became a little bit notorious is here. We are the dark side of MN. Welcome.

Happy shagging, shaggers!

Tink that is a great idea! Who's starting the next? One of the upduffed lurkers? Or Lil, to celebrate starting the next leg of your journey?

Need a bit of a catch up from yesterday already!

Mountain glad to hear from you, we've all been thinking about you and sending our love. Still wtf cycle at the mo so am of little use from that perspective.

kez hope you're feeling better - my money's on icing pain too. Stop kidding yourself you'll hold out that long not too mention the viroid need for stick action

gaggia hope you been JSing

Welcome must lovely to have join us. Just get the jizz in the right hole!

tink she is a bitch fuckwit chum bucket

That's more like mine honey! 1st AF after BC I had a horrible 2nd day. Got through a super plus in ONE HOUR?! Following visits less traumatic but I have a medium, 1 heavy, 2 medium & then 3 light. It's wankbadgery, it really is.

Vote lil for new thread honour too

mountain hugs. It's fucking shit. I find I can't bare to think about it these days. The wtf cycle is a whole bag of whaaaaaaaaaat! My next cycle started later and the period was heavier and longer and spottier and browner but mostly pain free.

The next Fred will be a lucky one I hope.

Yeh I suppose it could be icing pains bat.... I don't know what my cycle is doing as yet - only time will tell n all that.

Have spoken to DH and he says no break but said I need to stop thinking about it and overanalysing every twinge, pain or nip. He agrees that me symptom spotting is causing ME stress and won't be helping how I'm feeling - which on top of his own stress isn't what we need.

So I'm going to JS and not even analyse any pains etc that I get. Just going to go with the flow litreally if the bitch turns up

I'm still going to come on here though because you are all ace and the support on here is much needed x

mountain xx

noniks I managed a 3pm shag think we missed the egg though. Anyway I came 3 times so it's not all bad. Congratulations Mr gaggia on your generous penis

Glad you're sorted kez. Sounds sensible.

Ok Lil it is!

mountain i didn't have a wtf cycle. No change from normal. Guess i mc too soon to do any real damage.

Bloody hell Gaggia, can you still walk straight?!

Fricking he'll gaggia I'd forgotten about your multiples!! Thought I was lucky that I got my rocks off with DHs awesome penis on occasion twice but I am jealous of your super sensitive fanjo!!

My wtfs have been a bit longer than usual but the AF at the end entirely random - one heavier, the other lighter...no help at all. Much love Mountain

Gaggia - nice work

gaggia stop showing off!!! well jell

mountain so glad to hear from you! Xx

I also vote our dear lillian for the next Fred honours, in anticipation of her upcoming BFP

Welcome mustbe

I just smoked a fag cos there was one in the garage that someone must have left here at the weekend. I washed it down with a shot of limoncello cos that was all that is open in the sideboard. Now I feel diabolically guilty! There is a part of me that thinks it is pregnant all the time now, even when I am bleeding! Back on the good girl wagon immediately - this is not going to help!! Considering going vegan/yoga super healthy for a bit!

No idea how I have got through all these years of this. Posting about it on here seems to bring out a lot of emotions I ignored before. Just spoke to Mr.T on the phone as he is working away and for the first time ever he was surprised af came. He's never said anything like it before but he said he thought we'd cracked it this time!

Gaggia would you consider hiring him out? Not that Mr.Tink falls short you understand, just that 3 sounds awesome!! I am going to join you in the Christmas skinny jeans!

Honey do you do special diet for lupus? Is vegan recommended for auto-immune?

Noniks did you ice yet?

Kez having a plan is good - its good not to pile the pressure on yourselves, particularly in the early days. The last thing you want is for either of you to resent ttc if you have lots of other stuff going on.

la I hope you are having a lovely time with your mum. I'm sure it will be poignant but I hope you both have a relaxing few days.

Watching 16 and pregnant whilst trying to catch up with the work I should have been doing today. Thought it might bring out the green eyed monster but I actually feel awful for these poor kids - cant imagine becoming a mummy when still a child myself!

tink sorry my dear, didn't realise you were out this month that's so annoying. I had a feeling this month was a good one for you.

Well DP just made me POAS, BFN ofc. Saves me doing one at the weekend.

His rationale behind me doing it was he bought some massage oils that a rent safe for pregnant people lol

Oops posted too soon!!

Yeh massage oils, so se tested them out with a quick shag after. Very nice haha.

lil you doing the next Fred ?

Right, will you lot shut up so I can catch up?!

mountain - in terms of WTF cycle, it will be hard for anyone to tell you what will happen as it is different for everyone. There is a TRC after MC thread that I found helpful to ask. For me, I was lucky in a way. Body is shit at TTC but good at MC and my next cycle started roughly when I would have expected if MC was CD1. Was heavier though. Not always the case. Give yourself some time though and just go with it as much as possible.

kez - JS and tell us about your symptoms! We can hooya or fuel the madness as needed! Agree with lil now, no breaks - just keep going and you will deal with it if you need to.

This day 21 thing needs rebranding doesn't it? GPS just take it at its word and don't always have the experience of the science behind to know when to do it really. Mine is always telling me she isn't a fertility doctor which is fair enough as they can't know it all!

How are you getting on yourself dulcet? How many weeks are you now?

Hi Mountain, great to hear from you. Wine is good at times like these. Hope you're doing ok. My wtf cycle was like Dulcet's I think. I remember AF showing up roughly when I thought it would. Although not sure about ovulation etc. I had two weeks of bleeding after mc.

Welcome back Mountain. Hope you're feeling ok and physically it's not too traumatic. Emotionally it definitely takes a while.

I didn't have a wtf cycle. I had a normal period exactly 28 days after m/c

Evening everyone else. Anyone due to POAS this week?

I had normal blood sugar all day yesterday...hip hip hurray!

Great news purple! Any idea on when you'll be permitted bareback again?

Think so tink, just iffy on when. I was sure it happened on Saturday (1 day late) as tender breasticles kicked in Sunday but think FF wants to mark it as Monday due to temp dip that day I have in no way played with removing aforementioned dip to see what happens

Hello Viroids,

I've been playing catch up again!

Candy I agree with everyone else. Try again in a few days. Gx for you!

Tink I totally agree we need to fill this Fred and move on to a nice shiny new one where there will be lots of BFPs! (Hopefully with Candy being one of them!)

Kez I agree you should keep trying - in that you should shag where possible, but without putting too much pressure on, and laying off the symptom spotting, temping, and all that jazz.

Welcome Must. .

I am suffering from jealousy again. One of my mums at school gave birth just under a month ago. Dad has been bringing the older one to school, but today mum brought her (and I got to meet baby). Cutest little sleeping bundle ever!!!

Not too bad indigo but mainly trying not to think about it as that brings the worries. Should be 8 weeks tomorrow. Nothing booked to confirm that though!

Great news on sugars purple, keep it up!

Ainat I can't stand being around tiny babies at the moment. I just want to cry when I see one!

I'm due to ice next Friday. I'm going to see what it's like between now and then and make a decision. DH is still resting the awesome one in the hopes it doesn't break again! It's very frustrating I need some proper loving

What dpo are you noniks? Are we still poas buddies?