The home of sporn lovers and cunthawks; make sure the ewcm is coming from the right hole and don your capes (but don't put parsley up your chuff!) ... for JUST SHAGGING Part 33

[mountaingirl01]

Ladies, Fred title says it all; we are the ones who shag as much as our men can cope with in order to get upduffed without the stress of scientific whatnots!

Fred rules (copied and adapted from previous Fred)

1. Thou shalt shag as much as humanly possible in order to get upduffed.
2. Thou shalt not partake of OPKs, temping, or charting.
3. Thou shalt keep symptom spotting to a minimum.
4. Thou shalt share with your fredmates where needed.

JSing lingo

ERTD = Evil Red Tide of Dooooooommmmmmm. Or AF to most others. Also know as 'the witch', 'bitch witch' and 'that one with the red shiny convertible'

Viroid = This is you, dear poster. This is from the first JS thread when someone tried to type 'ladies' and it autocorrected to 'Viroids' - so there you go!

Pant snot = Egg white cervical mucus.

Doing a kitten = Getting upduffed soon after joining (warning: may induce envy in other posters).

POAS = Pee On A Stick (of the pregnancy detecting kind, not from a tree). Also known as PIAR (Pee In A Ramekin - cos we're posh birds innit). Or PIATLH (Tea light holder) PIAWG (Wine glass) or anything else you care to pee in! PONF = Pee on Nigel Farage. Self explanatory, who wouldn't? 

ROC - Receptacle of Choice - what one chooses to use for the task of POAS. Option decorations include photographs of political leaders.

JIAC = Jizz in a Cup. Preferable to jizz on the carpet or jizz in the eye. This one's for the lucky men in our lives.

Shagging like something = JSing like a teenage nymphomaniac.

Giving a hooya = Giving a much needed slap to a fellow poster in danger of slipping into ttc obsession. Warning - this may happen to you if you start trying to POAS at 5dpo. PUT. THE. PISSY. STICK. DOWN. IT'S TOO EARLY!

Contraband = Of COURSE none of us EVER partake of any silly OPKs or temp charting. They are Contraband.

Icing = ovulating. Another autocorrect development!

Getting your Cape on = planning some serious pouncing on DH/DP

TWOT - Two Weeks of Torture. AKA Schroedinging!
TWPU - Two Week Piss Up!

Keeping your gingers = fingers crossed, yet another autocorrect development! Shortened to 'gx'

The link to Part 31 is here

The current Grads Fred is here

The rather nobbish article in which we became a little bit notorious is here. We are the dark side of MN. Welcome.

Happy shagging, shaggers!

hi must. definitely no tmi here!

tink so sorry. it never gets any easier does it. at least you are moving forward with tests etc now and whilst its only a small consolation atm in the long run its a giant step forward.

mountain hope you're as OK as can be and are being looked after.

Oh Tink. Big smelly poo! So sorry hun.

Now i am going to Google best positions for maximal jizz delivery. Interesting search history.

So sorry tink - is this a second round of tests or first lot? I'm sat in the waiting room for blood tests at the moment.

Welcome must!

Did anyone else find their AF changed after coming off the pill? In 10 months I must have used about three tampons! Who knew AF could be so light (and brown)?!

(In keeping with there being no such thing as TMI in this thread)

I'm also v envious of people able to squeeze in a lunchtime JS. I commute to London and the DH works from home. Not great logistics!

Aww boooo tink I'm really sad for you - no advice really with being a newbie and all but I've had friends go through all this crap so I've seen the heartbreak even though haven't experience it myself yet Hope you are OK.

lemondrizzle I'm not totally sure when I'm due to POAS - is it on first day of when AF is due or a certain number of days after icing? I have no idea when or even if I iced, I did have a bit of pants not at some point but not sure if that means definite icing. AF is due (if cycle length is same as last month) on Tues. But I have exams next Thurs and Fri so if AF doesn't show her face which I know is mega unlikely with this being my first go then there is no way I can POAS until Saturday 6th because if it was good news then I wouldn't never in a million years be able to concentrate on revision and exams! So at the mo I'm expecting to be in the company of the witch this time next week but if not then I will POAS on 6th. Jeez this is longest month ever, hope it gets easier to wait but I'm guessing it only gets worse

bumble my last AF was first since coming off the pill and I had one day where it was normal, one very light (only just needed tampon) and then 3 days of the tiniest bit that was only there when I wiped. except for the day I put my nice knickers on and then of course she managed to escape the fanjo

bumble that doesn't sound right. I got much heavier periods after stopping pill but they settled after a few months. I now get 1day med-heavy, 2days med, 2days light then spot for a day or 2. I'd ask gp about it as your lining may not be good enough for implantation or you may not be ovulating. don't mean to worry you.

I feel I need to post this again.

oh :-/ mine have been lighter since stopping bcp as well. it did cross my mind I might not be icing despite using cb dual hormone thingy so am trying to attempt temping and if that doesn't confirm I'll go the docs but hadn't thought about the dodgy lining bit :-/

that's ace honey!*

lil I did think that but asked the doctor about it twice, once about two months after coming off the pill, and once when I asked about getting tests done (eight months or so). Both times he said it doesn't matter, as long as they're regular. Which I thought was weird. Perhaps I should get second opinion? Either way, I'm in the process of getting the tests done, too, so hopefully I'll get some answers soon. Not liking the odds of being on my ninth cycle since TTC, especially since I'm doing everything else right! (Loads of JSing, good food, no booze etc etc.)

honey - brilliant.

Tink sorry to hear that hun. Big hugs to you.

Literally the day from hell today. 6 back-to-back meetings....just finished!

Also, Hooyah please. Been feeling extremely nausious today (and slightly nausious yesterday). Very unusual feeling for me (i'm never sick) but:

-My grandparents have both come down with a vomiting bug so it might just be that
-I haven't eaten anything all day (nor most of yesterday) due to being in meetings all day and over lunch time.

Still, hooyah pleease!

Definite hooya for you jelly! Eat something!

Oh tink I'm so sorry. Glad you have a plan though

Welcome must!

Hooyah jelly! This is coming from the girl who convinced myself for a short while earlier that I was pregnant because I was a bit gassy last week for a few days which is unusual and I've got a bit fatter neither of those are anything to do with all the crap I've been eating recently of course and I hardly think that a barely conceived embryo would be bursting my buttons on my trousers God this TTC makes us a bit loopy doesn't it!

bumble kh I'm no expert and I guess if Dr says its fine they know best supposedly but at the very least I would temp to confirm ovulation and push for a day 21 progesterone and amh blood test.

oh and day 22 is 7days before AF not always day 21

day21 not 22 obvs. fat gingers!

Hooya jelly !

Welcome must - take a seat

bumble mine are shorter, only by a day - last one was 4 days and a week earlier than I thought it would be. Putting this down to having only been off bc since August.

bat I couldn't agree more. I was adamant that last night's huge pains I was having were down to implantation. I thought I ov'd really early this month and it kinda added up. Not convinced now or that's what I'm trying to tell myself

Well - after feeling sorry for myself, the pains I was having last night seemed to subside after about an hour. No idea what they were but felt like period pains. Now is the sitting and waiting game, hoping the red bitch doesn't arrive. Don't think a bfp will be happening this month though, not feeling confident about it.

Was in a right huff with DH this morning and no idea why. Brought the mood into work too but felt a little chirpier this afternoon.

Thinking of suggesting to the other half that we put ttc'ing on hold until early next year. He is going through a bit of a shit time at the minute and work is stressful for me, so think it might be for the best. stress level would be reduced if i stopped constantly reading pains/checking for symptoms!

lil went for first blood test today and was told that, as day 21 is on a sat, to go back on day 20 for progesterone test. So those wheels are officially in motion!

Also temping (have been for last five months or so), and it's a bit all over the place, but generally higher in second half of cycle.

Feeling paranoid today. It doesn't seem right to have had such light, brown AF for so long. I actually phoned company helpline and nurse said it could well be hormonal and that they're taking longer to click into gear after bcp. They also said that even if blood tests show hormone imbalance, that nine months isn't very long in the fertility world and I might be waiting for another year while they keep an eye on hormones before they intervene. Seems so long! Sigh.

In need of a holiday to just relax, I think. It's been three and a half years since I went abroad!

batfish - EVERYTHING is a symptom, or so we seem to tell ourselves.

Ha bumble this is true! I probably do feel gassy and fat on a regular basis but I've just never been analysing every little twinge and feeling my body has before!

kez I had very mild period type pains for a few days a week or so ago which was clearly pregnancy which I guess must have been ovulation pains - or at least I hope it was as would mean I did actually ovulate! Could it be the same for you? Or is it def past ovulation time for you?

If it is at all possible to go from being obsessed to not thinking about it at all then maybe you could stop 'trying' for a few months but don't try not to....if that makes sense. Then if it happens it happens but you're not pressuring yourselves.

bumble day21 is a myth unless you have regular 28day cycles. what is your normal cycle length?

I wouldn't recommend taking a ttc break. maybe ditch the overanalysing and expectation but I'm glad I didn't take breaks eg so I wasnt pg at friends wedding, so I wasn't pg for a holiday. but then I'm an old barren hag who's been at this for way too long!

Well I've eaten a biscuit!!

Still feel sick tho lol. I've told DP he's taking me out to nandos for dinner. Got two days off work now plus the weekend. It's out 6 year getting together annerversary so gonna celebrate now my mini period (or whatever the fuck it was) has stopped.

lil it's about 30 days - I asked if that would make a difference and if I should get the test a little later, and the nurse said definitely to come in for day 20 for the test.

I don't think I will stop trying, but I might stop temping. Why have I given up alcohol?! I could inhale do with a glass of red right now.

Thanks for all the lovely messages viroids- i have been lurking. Sadly my hcg levels have more than halved in less the 48hrs so I will be joining you again soon. Not sure what to feel at the moment so trying to forget all about it and trying to enjoy my first alcohol in a month I would give up wine for the rest of my life if it brought my baby back

Who wants to tell me about their wtf cycles?

Here's to us tink

And honey and all others the bitch has got

Hey Mountain lovely to hear from you. So so sorry. Its truly shite. I hope you are getting plenty of rl support and are keeping busy/taking it easy depending on which works for you (I am a lazy ass take it easy kinda girl - all the way).
I hope very much that we can help take your mind off it if that is what will help. We could start by filling up this damn unlucky Fred with a load of toss and starting a new one!!!

Oh mountain, I'm so sorry, and so glad to hear from you. I know it doesn't feel like it now, but it does get better... Or at least you get better able to cope with it.

I put my bfp stick and a few trinkets (left over granny squares from a blanket i was making, a card i wrote for my in laws) and put them together in a nice box. I want to remember my baby, but i also needed to compartmentalise it. Its nice & extremely sad to look through now and then.