Get your cape on, get your cape on! Don't come knockin if the tent's a rockin, but pee on a snake instead - It's just shagging part 27

[lildottie]

Ladies, Fred title says it all; we are the ones who shag as much as our men can cope with in order to get upduffed without the stress of scientific whatnots!

Fred rules (copied and adapted from previous Fred)

1. Thou shalt shag as much as humanly possible in order to get upduffed.
   
2. Thou shalt not partake of OPKs, temping, or charting.
   
3. Thou shalt keep symptom spotting to a minimum.
   
4. Thou shalt share with your fredmates where needed.
   

JSing lingo
~~~~~~~~~

ERTD = Evil Red Tide of Dooooooommmmmmm. Or AF to most others.

Viroid = This is you, dear poster. This is from the first JS thread when someone tried to type 'ladies' and it autocorrected to 'Viroids' - so there you go!

Pant snot = Egg white cervical mucus.

Doing a kitten = Getting upduffed soon after joining (warning: may induce envy in other posters).

POAS = Pee On A Stick (of the pregnancy detecting kind, not from a tree). Also known as PIAR (Pee In A Ramekin - cos we're posh birds innit). Or PIATLH (Tea light holder) PIAWG (Wine glass) or anything else you care to pee in!

JIAC = Jizz in a Cup. Preferable to jizz on the carpet. This one's for the lucky men in our lives.

Shagging like something = JSing like a teenage nymphomaniac.

Giving a hooya = Giving a much needed slap to a fellow poster in danger of slipping into ttc obsession.

Contraband = Of COURSE none of us EVER partake of any silly OPKs or temp charting. They are Contraband.

Icing = ovulating. Another autocorrect development!

Getting your Cape on = planning some serious pouncing on DH/DP

TWOT - Two Weeks of Torture!

The link to Part 25 is here

The current Grads Fred is here

The rather nobbish article in which we became a little bit notorious is here

Happy shagging, shaggers!

[jellypi3]

Oh wow Leela I'd be fuming too! Men do try us sometimes don't they!!

I had a bit of a special moment yesterday when I realised I've been counting the months since my injection wrong! I've been counting from May, when I should of had my last one when I should be counting from February when I did have my last one (apparently). So really it's been 6 months since I came off! Bloody depo is the bane of my life right now!!

[gaggiagirl]

Morning viroids!

Im on the mobile site and mnhq have changed it and I can't get used to it grrrrr.

[BertieBotts]

Apparently it's a bug gaggia and they're fixing it.

[BeforeIChangeMyMind]

All quiet again here this morning, I was probably just having a moment watching OBEM. I didn't think it was morning sickness, just reminded me of that same feeling. But I agree with wilma - nausea is pretty non-specific as a "symptom" and could mean anything. Ho hum.

Am struggling with a bit of anxiety at the moment. Can't say more as I don't want to out myself, but if any of you have any experience of dealing with anxiety and would be willing to share (or PM me), either with or without anti-d's, I'd be really grateful. Am getting there, slowly, but finding that others are trying to put a time-limit on my recovery and coming out in favour of pills, which I have avoided thus far. But then again they might be the right idea - just not sure what to do...

[Leela5]

before I suffer from GAD ask away! X

[RPopz]

Nausea is quite non specific as a symptom... BUT it was one of my first I remember quite clearly about a week after ovulation I got home from walking the dog one afternoon and had about 5 minutes of overwhelming nausea and retching over the kitchen sink. Totally out of the blue and over very quickly but def set the suspicions off in my mind...

I have anxiety and dp too. I've been taking fluoxetine for the entirety of this pregnancy. Not an ideal situation but better than the alternative (for me anyway). Fluox is thought to be the safest ad for ttc/ pregnancy. I've taken propanonol in the past for anxiety but apparently that does not make for hospitable fertilisation environment!! Have you thought about cbt? I could never get on with it myself but some people swear by it. You can get a gp referral or there are online "courses" - MoodGym is one. Is counselling something you were offered after the mc? I'm guessing some of the anxiety is stemming from that. I'm sorry close ones are not being so supportive. Drugs are not a sign of weakness and can be immensely helpful - even if just to motivate you to find an alternative therapy. I find they just make life generally easier for me and DH.. I can be myself instead of the mental health monster!! But I understand they're not for everyone. Hugs xx

[ChatEnOeuf]

Morning viroids. Did Mr La make it home last might La? I'd have been furious as well, cheeky fool.

Really, jelly? I would have counted from when it was expected to stop working...

Nausea is nonspecific, just a little hooya for you :) It didn't hit me until 6 weeks with DD, not at all with my first mc and was one of the first symptoms around when AF was due last time.

I have/had PND with anxiety - feel free to ask whatever you like. I delayed going to the doc, blaming tiredness on DD's crap sleep, short-temperedness on tiredness, etc. Went on citalopram which took about a month to work but was right for me. Halved it in June and stopped with the BFP in July. Can feel the symptoms returning but resisting restarting just yet. I don't want to blame it for the mcs but at the same time I don't want to take it if I can avoid it.

[BeforeIChangeMyMind]

Thanks viroids. I don't want to read and run but have to pop out now so will ask away when I get back.

[laurenamium]

Morning viroids. So it's DPs birthday today and after all of the symptoms I POAS with FMU this morning. Got the faintest of faint lines. It could be me with line eye or it could be an Evap so ill test again tomorrow. It's far too early to be testing anyway! I didn't take a photo because I'm useless

[gaggiagirl]

lauren when is your AF due? You know what they say......a line is a line!

[laurenamium]

AF is due on Monday trying to not be excited!

[gaggiagirl]

my AF is due Monday t

[gaggiagirl]

Friggin phone! Yes im due then too although I suspect you may not be getting yours! Everything crossed for you x

[Leela5]

A line is a line is a line!

before I was on cetalopram for a year with CBT sessions. The cetalopram helped me to get it under control then CBT gave me a longer term way of dealing with it. Eventually came off pills (torture as I had severe withdrawal).

Speak to gp for referral.

GAD is shit I can be fine one minute and pretty chilled about life then suddenly have a panic attack. Ttc for this long is killing me as I've got no control over it and the older im getting the more panicked I feel.

Mine has been assessed and is anxiety with OCD so you can imagine why I'm drawn to contraband hence being on this Fred!

There is good and bad support out there. My CBT therapist was an angel and made massive difference. I find docs are far too keen to shove antidepressants at a case. My dh is great he will sit down with me when I have an attack and help me to write it all down. Seeing the rationale on paper calms me (I was taught to do this in CBT). Have had other counsellors who call it 'worry'. That's like telling someone with an amputated leg it's just a cut.

Support is there, I'd recommend you ask for it but it doesn't have to be pills there are different options to suit individuals. As popz said CBT is not for everyone.

[Leela5]

lauren post a picture of line!

chat Mr La was suitably sorry. It wasn't him being late that annoyed me it was being told by someone else. He's my husband for fucks sake!

[jellypi3]

oOo fx for you Lauren :)

[BertieBotts]

Line is a line. If it's early it will be faint. Sounds good! :) Test again in 2-3 days, it should be stronger.

[KatoPotato]

KITTEN?!?!?!

[KatoPotato]

Just kidding, congrats!!!

[BeforeIChangeMyMind]

Fx Lauren it sounds very promising indeed.

How can I do this without "outing"self... hmmm. The months before and immediately after my mc were massively work-stressful and now when I'm at work I panic, despite the complete lack of stress. It had started to spill out into other areas of my life until I started getting treatment, less so now, thank goodness.

Promising signs - I spoke to someone about it today and for the first time, I felt like she 'got it' in a way others haven't. So I can see, for possibly the first time, how I'm going to manage from here on and get back to where I want to be. I feel huge relief. I've taken up all the referrals going: recently started counselling and have some guided self help (CBT) in the pipeline, plus I've been listening to this CD and the one for GAD.

So everything except pills, really. I'm not against them in any way, just never felt that I needed them where I was at. I was just about at the point of asking GP about my options for medication, but the appointment I've just had makes me feel like I can be supported to get back on track without - I guess time will tell.

In terms of what I wanted to ask - just "what helps"? I guess, which you've already been kind enough to share. Thanks lovely viroids.

[wilmabedrock]

I have taken pills for both depression and anxiety (mainly citalopram and lorazepam). I think they help when you get to the stage that nothing else does, but I came off them as quick as possible because I didn't like the kind of dead feeling they give you (citalopram, not lorazepam - they're amazing ). I actually find exercise is the most helpful thing - proper heart rate pumping exercise, not the kind where you fanny about on the cross trainer for 5mins . And then also something like yoga/pilates/body balance for the anxiety. It's hard to get into when you're feeling down and lethargic but it's really the main thing which I found useful.

Also having some goal to work towards that is unrelated to something which stresses you out (so not a career thing if work is stressing you). Could be exercise related, if you're into running/cycling or whatever, or learning something new/progressing in some hobby. I think you can lose quite a lot of confidence through anxiety and depression and this can be a way of showing yourself you're still capable even if you're not doing great at work/home.

Last thing is not to pressure yourself with unrealistic demands. Making lists of things which need to be done can be useful but aim to complete 1 a day instead of 45. I can get overwhelmed by everything which 'needs done', but if you really examine it, most things aren't urgent.

Lastly if you think it all comes from a specific place like the mc, or the way you reacted to something at work then counselling or cbt may be useful. I can't open up enough for counselling and am way too lazy for cbt but it must work for some people.

[honeysucklejasmine]

Hi! Hope you don't mind if I join you, rather than lurking like a ... creepy lurky thing... (??) DH and I have just started TTC, and we're terrified of prepared for the long haul as I've been blessed with endometriosis & lupus. (Lucky I.) Please wish us luck! Nothing cements disappointment like agonising pain every month, so really hoping for a quick conception.

[Leela5]

I know kato yet another kitten coming on here, getting up the duff, making the rest of us look like we don't shag enough...



It will be our turn soon, just remember not to eat the jizz!

[Leela5]

Hi honey! welcome to the gang!

[KatoPotato]

Yeah, I was going to say I was more panda than kitten, but even tian tian's got a better constitution than me!!!