The Elderberry Pavlovas are tooling up and making plans to bust out of this joint! Evacuation by helicopter by end of September, no berry left behind!

[barkingtreefrog]

The smallprint –
Berries have a strict entrance criteria (TTC #1, over 30, TTC for 12+ months, NO instadiffers, must have a special pot and definitely no mention of baby dust or baby dancing).
Those not abiding by the rules may be escorted from the premises.

Ha ha wild. I am just counting down the five weeks until St Lucia. I should feel happy for her as they have been married a similar amount of time as us so they might have also had ttc issues.

Hey lady that sounds like promising news, I have everything crossed for you.

hb Sounds like you're in a really positive frame of mind, I hope it has a knock-on fertility effect!

wildflower I get equally wound up by such comments! Probably the mist hurtful was from FIL who said that "A marriage without children isn't a marriage." WTF. I think one day I'm going to call him and MIL up on all the things they've said amd how hurtful they've been.

lumen It's totally normal to feel like that, it doesn't make you a bad person. I am BM in a couple of weeks and know that B2B is going to ttc straight away (and is even talking openly how she hopes she'll have a baby by next year) If she instadffs then I know I'm going to hate her for it. St Lucia sounds like it will be amazing, am very jealous!

gillster How are you getting on with downregging, how long do you have to continue for?

Day 4 of down-regging is going fine Chloe although realised tonight that I've only been injecting one tenth of what I've been supposed to. Think I'll be OK though as all the literature I have read says to start DR on day 21 or 7 days before AF is due. If this were true then I would actually start the injections on Weds/Thurs. Unsuprisingly I haven't experienced any side effects yet!

I totally understand your response Lumen. Don't feel bad.

Keeping everything crossed and really hoping that this is your time Lady.

hi lady good to see you back in HQ. I'm sorry if I'm not meant to get excited but that sounds very promising . So a just a little squeak of excitement from me, and a paw hold. Will be keeping everything crossed for you.

hb good to hear from you too. I'm also working on the mindfulness stuff. I have found it helps to keep me positive, but I struggle to stick to it. I also am finding yoga very helpful too.

pg announcements are the pits lumen but don't blame yourself for feeling cross about them. I had to go to a meeting with one of our junior managers, who I'm not particuarly fond of at the best of times. She got pg by accident and I had to listen to her tell me all about how had been going out and drinking loads because she didn't know. Anyway, you have your amazing holiday to look forward to! We are off to Italy in just under 5 weeks, so I'll join you on the holiday countdown.

waves to everyone else!

I am only at work for three days this week, then off up the coast for a short break. One day down, two more to go! Weather looks pants, but I don't care! Having a month off acupuncture as my lady is on holiday over my key dates, so also ditching the temping and everything else and just taking it easy this month.

Lumen hope tomorrow's appointment goes well. 5 weeks til that amazing holiday will fly by!

All ages over 30 are welcome in my book! (As per the minimum age of the group )

Wild and Rain - sailing! Fancy it sounds fab but hard work. Hope you have recovered a bit from the baby crazy family party Rain, that's a shit evening no matter how positive you feel. Def screw them all. As wild says people are not considerate when chatting about this stuff.

Gill how is stabbing going? Or is it sniffing?

Lady welcome back! Absolutely all fingers and toes crossed for you for a bffp!

Lumen yey to joining the rattling! The coq10 is well expensive like! I couldn't get any royal jelly though they were sold out(!) sorry about the pg announcements though, it does make sane none jealous types into crazy envious ladies! at least it does for me

Happy how long til the wedding now?

HB it sounds like the extra month wait is being put to good use. Hope occupational health isn't too bad.

Chloe how's things going? You been feeling ok?

Tiger how annoying for you to have to listen to that! Arghhhh people are so thoughtless. I think a month of chilling might be nice for you!

Kuma sorry if I missed this but how was your acu? Did you enjoy it? I've got my second session tomorrow evening which I'm looking forward to.

Bushy if your reading this I'm thinking of you.

I think I'm approx 2dpo and been symptom spotting, totally setting myself up for a fall!

Sorry Gill I missed your update! Will you just increase the dosage now then?

bushy hope you're coping, cant imagine what your emotions must be doing
gill totally something i would do. will you check with FC that no issues because of it?
lumen what are all these rattling substances meant to do? would i take them on top of the pregnacare type pills?
glad to hear some berries are taking some little steps forwards and hoping to get some good news soon lady and chloe how you getting on?
my 'life's so difficult now i have a son' colleague is now expecting another. she got married same time as us. grrr. it's suprising that no matter how often you hear these things it still eats you up. however, on the bright side my younger sis and BIL aren't gonna start TTC for another yr so i still have a little time to get in there 1st if by any chance this ivf shockingly works.
what's cranio sacral therapy HB?
beaky you've got a very long 2WW if already symptom spotting...!
so so wish i was going on hols! looking into a bank hol wknd away with clubcard vouchers to see the in-laws (that i've got away with not seeing for 18 mths!)

Gillster I hope you stay symptom free even when you bump up the volume! Poor you having to do injections on an FET. At least it's going well so far.

lumen Hope your appointment goes well today. Afternoon tea with DH sounds lovely! Will be nice to have some relaxing time together.

Where are you off to in Italy tiger? Hope you have a great break this weekend and enjoy the month off temping etc etc.

beaky Glad you're enjoying the acu. Are you taking nasty Chinese herbs as well or just doing needles? Fingers crossed that this is the month for you! I'm doing fine, thanks to you and pixie for asking. Am feeling quite tired but am off work at the mo as had leave to use up, so am getting plenty of sleep. Have started to feel a bit nauseous, luckily it's really mild as it seems to be constant throughout the day. Am not going to complain tho as I am eternally grateful to have got this far.

pixie Have everything crossed that the IVF works out (and that you get in there before your little sister!) When are you due to start? Sorry if you said already but it's hard to keep up!

Not going to bother to check with the FC Pixie. They will take tests on 15th Aug and if I am not sufficiently down-regged they will just get me to continue for a few days. I will have taken 11 days at the correct dose rather than 14 so still reckon that will be sufficient.

hi all
Great to see you back lady. hope you're feeling hopeful
bushy as others have said, you're so strong and am full of admiration for the way you're coping.

Hi everyone else. we moved house this weekend hence radio silence. what a palaver. Now in shared MiL territory so house hunting starts in earnest tonight. Also tomorrow first app with new FC. wish me luck.

My mum comes out with those 'you don't understand love until you've had children' comments, wild. Just bloody awful, and you can't say that when you don't takl to your own children, IMHO (which she doesn't. 4 years and counting at the moment). People can be very thoughtless. I think what they really mean is 'i have absolutely no imagination so was surprised by how I felt when I had children' but as they have no insight they just say horrible things instead.

sorry about your downer evening, rain. hope the cheer has returned. Everyone seems to be perking up around here at the mo. is nice.

GOod luck over next few days gill

hi eveyrone else! off to do some unpacking.

Just to add to the woo therapy, I reached new levels of ttc desperation this month by buying fertility crystals from amazon and sleeping with them in my pillowcase...
I never got downregging symptoms apart from feeling drained at the end, I hope you stay symptom free Gill. Did you have 6 day one frosties? Do they defrost all of them at once?

nolly hope you get settled in ok to your new temp home, that it's manageable but you find your own place soon! Hope new FC is a helpful one.
chloe we're waiting on Mr P's op to (hopefully) find some fish then I'm good to get drugs ordered and start with sniffing, jabbing. His op anytime before mid-oct but he's on short notice (2 days) list so could be any time. And so hence can't book holiday..grrrr! gill What kinda levels of potion you taking if you don't mind me asking? Consultant didn't seem to be 100% sure what to do for me so decided to vary me between 2 amounts alternate days.
happy all set for the big day?
lady amazing what you can find on amazon! Hope they work for you. Did you poas again or leaving it few days?

Still positive and getting darker on the cheapies but still incredibly faint. DH can at least see the line now. Still only 10dpo and with the IVF chemical I had positives until 18dpo so got some way to go.

lady we missed you! I am keeping all available fingers and toes crossed for you. Come on little blastocyst!

to everyone and thanks for the gee-ing up after that shitty party. Life has mostly resumed as normal although yet another bloody birth announcement from friends who announced their diffment (early) as i was MCing has made me maudlin today.

Will catch up on the thread properly later

rain hope you can keep it together...these crappy moments are tough but keep coming on here to rant it out. We're all in this together experiencing all sorts of nonsense that we shouldn't have to shoulder. I told myself to stop using Facebook becAuse of stupid "we're pleased to announce..." bloody updates but another frickin announcement today from old school friend who not even been with her fella very long. Accompanied by obligatory scan photo. Rather than liking or adding celebratory comment i've removed stAtus updates from her, how bad is that?!
lady shall keep calm and collected for you and have everything crossed.

pixie I don't blame you, I would have done the same! Being able to let off steam in berry HQ keeps me sane too. I also feel as though my some of my RL friends have been pretty crap, for example, dismissing the fact that we haven't got pg as something to make the most of and enjoy whilst at the time expecting us to celebrate their own happy news. Without this support network I'd be really adrift.

Hang in there rain! The crap just keeps on coming but stay strong!

lady that is fantastically woo. Lets hope it brings the magic!

chloe we're off to Umbria as family have a place there. Not been before but looking forward to a relaxed week there, then a couple of days in Rome to coincide with OHs birthday.

nolly hope the move went well. I hate moving! We were such nomads until 18 months ago when we moved into our house but even that felt a bit temporary as we were renovating at the same time. Good luck with the mil situation, hope you find a place of your own soon.

Pixie I know! I never normally symptom spot and dunno why the eff I've started this month! Sorry to hear about your pg work colleague but fx you are announcing yours soon!

Chloe I'm just doing needles although she recommended herbs but I really can't afford both. Dh was not impressed with the cost of the needles alone! Did u get herbs? Would any berry who took them recommend them? Glad all is going well so far for you, hope you don't get too much sickness.

Nolly good luck for your first FC appointment! Also hope you find somewhere to live ASAP

Oo Lady fertility crystals! I'm am keeping all fingers and toes crossed for you for this one.

Rain boo to another announcement, you know where the hide button is! Hope you're keeping your chin up and tits out (it was you who told us that wasnt it?!) Pixie totally understand too! The last thing you want is a bunch of notifications for that status because you had to comment on it out of politeness and who wants to see inside another woman's womb anyway?!

Lumen how was your appointment and afternoon tea?

Does anyone else have any strong opinions of whether the herbs are worth it alongside the needles? Also I've forgotten to take any supplements at all since last Friday. Hmm!

Hi all, the review appointment was ok this morning thanks beaky. Saw one of the consultants who was very nice. He ran through all the results and how the embryos progressed, apparently they were on the slow side but there is nothing they suggest for that. He did recommend increasing my stimm drugs next time so I might get more follicles and therefore more embryos. Got the results of my AMH which were in the low range but he said it didn't concern him. He did however say that whilst I might be physically healed, me and dh need to heal our souls before we start again! We weren't aware that there was anything wrong with our souls, we better start searching.

pixie I believe that the coq10 and royal jelly can help the quality of your eggs. They are really expensive though so I got enough to get me through my next IVF cycle and will start when I get back from hols.

gill hope the jabbing is going ok, wouldn't worry about the dose, as you say they will just get you to take it for longer.

nolly (?) I hope the move wasn't too painful and that you are finding everything in your boxes (think it was you who moved but on phone and have bad memory)

Hope the nausea doesn't get too bad chloe. Do you have any scans booked in?

Afternoon tea was lovely and a nice way to finish our day out. After trying to 'forget' about ttc this month I know that we had a good shag week and that AF is due thurs, so I am also symptom spotting, we are our own worst enemies.

Hi to everyone else I missed.

Just checking in and haven't rtft. Lady what super news, everything xed!

Good luck with the house hunting nolly, hope it's not long before you find the perfect place.

lady I have everything crossed still and hope the woo crystals make this one stick! TBH at 10 dpo I would expect the line to still be really faint anyway on an IC. FX FX on both hands!

Sorry you have to put everything on hold for the on notice op pixie, how rubbish. Good on you for the old status blocking. I got really grumpy today after seeing from FB that a couple I know who are both v overweight are pregnant. I know I'm really mean saying that but it just winds me up that me and DH do everything to stay healthy and it doesn't make a damn bit of difference.

Hope you're doing ok today after that birth announcement rain. Hang in there it'll be you one day, hopefully soon!

beaky I took the herbs as well but was a bit reluctant at first in case they messed with the IVF treatment. In the end I decided to go with it and trust my acu lady as she is experienced. It was mega expensive though, as she was prescribing me a different mix of herbs each week and they usually cost between 15 - 25 EUR each time. I'm really lucky tho as I'm in Germany and my insurance covers acu and 80% of the cost of woo medicine. I'm convinced that the acu and herbs did work for me (I have very severe PCOS). I actually ovulated on CD25 for the first time I know of, just before my frozen cycle. Even my RE was surprised. Also we were really lucky that the IVF worked the first time, with me having acu and nasty herbs thru the cycle. So I would say if you could stretch a little bit more to go for the herbs as well, I think it's worth it.

Hey lumen Sounds like the review meeting went well and that they have a good plan how to improve things next time. They often say that the first cycle is a bit of a shot in the dark, so I'm sure your chances will be much higher next time with the knowledge that's been gained. Any plan for how to mend your soul in the meantime!?!? Good luck for this month and here's hoping for a FUFC!

Re scans, have already had 3 (!) so far, it's so different to the UK over here. The FC does 2 as routine, 1st to confirm whether it's single or multiple and that interuterine, the 2nd to check the heartbeat. Also had one this week with my gynae as my first checking in appt.

So I am taking 500 micrograms of Suprecur once a day.

There are 6 one day embies in the freezer Lady. They will defrost 4 and hopefully pop back 2 of them.

Good luck with the house hunting Nolly and hope you settle into your new area soon.

Glad the appointment went OK Lumen, they don't seem to be too concerned about things.

Hello to everyone else!

Aww Lumen he sounds like a nice consultant. As for your soul, well try chicken soup, obv maybe he reads Emma cannon, she totally bangs on about your soul being right and chicken soup glad afternoon tea was lovely too. Are you going to start coq10 and RJ now? All fx AF stays away for you.

Chloe thanks for the advice, the herbs are about £20 a week on top of the needling so I really can't stretch at the moment. I'm hoping that there are no cysts at my next iui scan but if there are I may have to sell an arm to cover the herbs. (I'd sell a kidney but apparently I'm kidney deficient already) it really does sound like the whole acu process has really helped you though which gives me faith. I know what you mean re the overweight friends, we are the same and do our best to keep healthy, don't smoke or anything and it is hard when you see preggo smokers etc.

RP how are you keeping? Hope your sickness is going away now.

Nolly good luck for your appointment today, let us know how it goes.

Hi to everyone else!

argh, sorry Berries, I feel like all I do at the moment is come on here and have self-indulgent whinges.
One of our directors (I've been with this company since we were tiny, so have close working relationships with both) called me into an impromptu meeting earlier today, to discuss my thoughts on our company maternity policy. He definitely knows about the MC, but I can only assume he's forgotten (as otherwise he's way more insensitive than I thought). I sat there like for a minute, then had to stop the FLOODS OF TEARS from emerging and actually managed to have a conversation with him about it. I made sure to drop in my miscarriage in a few places and his expression did sort of freeze (strengthening my suspicion that the stupid arse forgot) and then got out of there.
The only upshots to all that is a) I didn't cry until I got back to my desk and b) I've told him in no uncertain terms that our current policy is shit and doesn't suit our company ethos at all.

GAH! This week is the week that just keeps on giving, it really fucking is!

lumen glad your appointment went OK, albeit except the soul damage!

nolly what happened at your appt? I lived with my MIL for a while before we bought our house so you have my deepest deepest sympathies. it was an ordeal to say the least!!!

pixie I gave FB up in January as the babifiedness of it was just too much - I had got to the point where I was ignoring updates from about 50% of my friends!! Don't miss it one iota.

beaky I really thought my needle woo lady would try to flog me supplements and herbs as it seems everyone else's does but she's not tried anything (apart from offering me a discount on Zita West vits). As such at the mo I am only taking my Folic Acid + Vit D and some Royal Jelly. I do have CoQ10 too - might start them again.

chloe how many weeks are you now? Time is slipping by fast at the moment and I am - as usual - struggling to keep up.

lumen & tiger I'm also with you on the holiday countdown. Less than a month to go till Mauritius! As such I have duly woken up with 'the fear' today and got my bastard evil cow Jillian Michaels DVD out for an early workout. Used it before my wedding and it worked a treat! Just need to resist the office biccies now.....

hi ladies

thanks for all the well wishing, and sorry I haven't had a chance to read the thread properly for a few days! Means loads to be able to see you all sending me nice messages though - thank you!

App went OK. Nice consultant which helps. The lowdown is: no NHS funding until 3 yrs TTC, then one funded IVF cycle and/or 3 IUI. Or we can go private in the meantime. So, we have to decide, another year to wait or get cracking on the treatment. He said (which corroborates stuff I've read elsewhere) that IUI has a success rate of about 15% and over a year pregnancy rates are the same as no treatment. hmmm.. Stuff to consider. Didn't say antyhign about my soul though, lumen - maybe he spotted that I'm basically dead inside and have no feelings ;)

Anyway, he said we had a good prognosis as were young, healthy etc, which is always nice to hear.

rain sorry about your ridiculous boss. So insensitive! beaky how's it going with the acu? are you enjoying it?

thanks again for the support berries. Back to the drawing shaggingboard

rain you are amazing for holding it together at the meeting. Sounds like the bossman forgot, as people at work tend to. Colleague that I was due as the same time as had her baby a couple of weeks ago and another colleague turned around and said "must be really weird for you to hear that. You should have had a baby too now" - yeah, thanks for that, douchebag.

lumen your consultant sounds lovely. FC people tend to overlook the emotional side of things a lot. Hope you and your OH have some lovely plans to help along the healing process.

lady that is amazing news! I am crossing everything for you.

How are you feeling chloe? Got everything crossed for you too.

gill how's the stabbing going? Sounds like all is well so far. Sending you Berrie power. When do your envies get put back?

beaky I'm in two minds about the herbs. With my first acupuncturist, I had to boil up some twigs for an hour every day and it just didn't work for me - kept forgetting or burning them etc etc. with my latest acu lady, she gave them to me in distilled form. I was useless and haphazard at taking them but the one thing I stuck with was the two drops of Vitex a day that she had me on (for my severe pcos). She found my rebellion at taking the other herb tincture amusing and stopped making it for me. I remember she said that the herbs compliment the acu but aren't absolutely essential, so if your budget can't stretch then I wouldn't worry too much. Have you asked her/him re Vitex? It's "natures clomid" appaz.

on my stupid phone so can only scroll back so far. Sorry for missing lots but sending you all huge Berrie power and, yep, I'm going to say it: love.