Home of the very brave TTC after MC-ers. Advice, understanding and a variety or food based euphemisms. Pull up a pew, ladies!

[Justonemoretime]

The Rules...

(1) A lady may only POAS on a Friday.
(2) Friday means the day that everyone calls Friday in the time zone where you spent the night.
(3) Rule (1) does not apply to POA-OPK-S, UNLESS they are being illegitimately used as surrogate HCG detectors, in which case Rule (1) most definitely does apply
(4) Rule (1) does not apply following a BFP because if you want to waste £25 a day POADigiS that's your prerogative
(5) Rule (1) does not apply if a lady is POAS in an attempt to get a BFN to prove she can start DTD with intent
(6) Rule (1) does not apply if a lady wants for unknown reason to pee on an actual stick, like a twig or some such, if that lady is unexpectedly caught short whilst tramping in the forest looking for bears.
(7) These rules (including Rule (1)) are subject to the change at any time if the ladies of the Posifrickentivity thread decide on a whim come up with empirical evidence to prove that it is luckier to POAS on any other day of the week
(8) Violators of Rule (1) shall be subject to fish throwing.

And as a grand finale, why not pledge to NEVER POAS before 14DPO?

Treacle ... If I wasn't by mysrlf I'd probably join you in a drink. Though i think I know what you mean. Last weekend DH was at home, we went out for dinner and he got me some wine. I really TRIED to enjoy it.

Yeah, I couldn't enjoy it. We're going to shrewsbury tomorrow for 2 nights away.
Feeling like it might've been a mistake. I need my comforts. I'm sure I'll be fine but night times are hard.

Treacle. I hope you get to relax this weekend. It sounds a good idea. I am off to a family BBQ today, then visiting friends next week. Lets try to get something out of our time away!

Definitely, I hope you enjoy it :)
We're all packed and ready to go.

Sighing I had a friend who texted me when she heard about mc and said she hoped I was ok. Then about a month afterwards saw me at a function with loads of other people there and said 'I don't really know how to talk to you'. I felt really embarrassed - especially as she was about 6 months preg at the time. Everyone went quiet and I felt it was my fault for being socailly unable to make a mc more paletable!

Some people just get a bit odd around mc I guess.

Sorry you've had people be funny about it Everyone I've told has been lovely and told me about their mc or those of other people's. It's like a wierd club, where you definitely don't want to be a member!

Thanks for virtual hugs, def feeling much better in daylight. time alone following a mc can be tricky as it lets you think too much and go on a bit of a downward spiral so the support is much appreciated.

Lots of sympathy with the wanting a drink but feeling like you shouldn't because after all you're not meant to be drinking you're meant to be pregnant- really rubbish.

I've been lucky when telling people in that they've been lovely and supportive but I also recognise the part where you try and make it more palatable for others, I'm sure that's why we all love this site- complete honesty, judgment free support.

Lots of hugs to everyone on the thread, hope you're bank holidays bring some peace and some smiles x

Definitely tallgiraffe. I feel like a failure having a friend who is the same age and expecting n august. I know that's stupid.

Posted this in the June bus but realised you lovely ladies will be more knowledgeable.
We have arrived for our mini break smile DH and I had a chat and we are going to try again as soon as I've had a period after my mc.
So that's quite a breakthrough. Will probably be late july/August depending on what happens to my cycle. Think I'll go right back to temping. Is it still reliable after mc?

Enjoy your break treacle.

We packed away all of DS's baby clothes away out of sight into the attic today. They've been boxed up as he's grown out of them but they were in a cupboard in his room. Now I won't have to accidentally see the boxes that are waiting for no 2 to wear them. Funny the things that you feel driven to do!

Treacle. It sounds a positive step. Temping. I've not done but what I've read has always given me the impression temping (when accurate) is very reliable.

Girafe. Hopefully you'll be posting that you've had to retrieve them in short order.
I can see why you've done that. So much reminds me. Not that I forget.

Morning ladies
Treaclepie I started temping straight after my miscarriage (well, to be accurate, during it - it was a mmc which didn't start until several days after a scan revealed the baby hadn't developed). I'd never tried temping before but felt I had to do SOMETHING and thought it's basically free, so why not. I log all my temps on a phone app. I counted the first day of the first cycle as the day I started bleeding from the mc. It was actually very useful in showing that I didn't ovulate until my third cycle after mc. This helped save me from the disappointment of hoping I could be pregnant again - I knew there was no chance because there was no egg released. According to my chart (and a +ve OPK result), I did actually ovulate this month so I'm hoping it is a sign I am starting to get back to "normal" - whatever that is!

Enjoy the bank holiday - shame about the crappy weather!

Thank you, I will start as soon as I'm back home then :)
It was my first cycle temping I got pregnant.

Morning ladies, I hope everyone is enjoying the long weekend!

I had a bit of a drunken argument with DH last night. We've been invited to his cousin's wedding next April and he said his mum is wanting to book the hotel rooms soon. So I pointed out to him that if we conceive in the next three months I'll either be ready to drop or have just had the baby, in which case I won't be going to any weddings. He then said "oh but we can always cancel", which I guess is correct, but I just felt really pissed off that it didn't even ocur to him that we might have a new baby by then! In a way I'm glad that he's not obsessing about cycles and dates as much as I do, but it sometimes feels like I'm alone in this whole shitty business... anyway, rant over.

Sorry to hear you had a falling out metal I think men want it but don't think / plan ahead like us my OH wants it to happen but forgets about it a lot! I think it seems until it's there seen on a screen or on a stick it's not real to them men seem to be more black and white.

It is frustratingly 'abstract' at times for DH. Is it because we're 'block booking' our bodies as well as our futures?

I know what you mean metalhead.
I think the mc has been less drawn out for DH as well. He felt the emotional impact while I was still in pain so by the time I've been getting emotional he's not there with me.

Like you say, men just see the here and now :/

Oh dear, I am ever so tearful tonight. I guess there will be ups and downs.

I am back to work tomorrow after for days off and I am staying being around people, abduct particularly avoiding questions about why I have been off.

Can I ask what/how much you told work?

Absolutely ginger, it's a really tough thing you're going through and there's lots of emotional stuff you have to go through in order to heal properly. Luckily, I run my own business so didn't have the awkwardness or misfortune of having to tell colleagues. I did, however, tell two of my biggest clients what had happened and explained I wasn't billing them for march (I mc feb 27) because I needed to take time off. Both were amazing and even sent me flowers, cards and chocolates. I defo wouldn't have had that from my previous employer so felt very privileged! Good luck for tomorrow xx

Oh and I've just bought some ic opk to get back into ttc mode. I've had a whole week of no bleeding now, yippee!

Broody glad to hear your body is trying to try to get back to normal.

Ginger I was lucky most people didn't ask (not sure if they knew) but one did ask and I just said I was unwell and left it at that.

Oh ginger, I'm so sorry you're feeling down :(
I've told work. I got the head to tell pellets I'm likely to talk to so they don't ask. I had flowers sent as well. I feel better that they know.

I hope (and am sure it will) that tomorrow goes well for you xxx

Good luck back at work today Ginger. I had told a few people at work who were very lovely to me. I did get a few comments from people who didn't know including two men who said 'Wow you've lost loads of weight!' That one knocked me for six a bit, would normally have been delighted to hear I was looking slimmer, but not when it was because my bump had gone :(
Try and prepare a couple of stock answers to the 'where have you been' 'have you been ill' type questions. And if theres any chance of leaving early or doing shorter hours today i would recommend it xxx

Broody Yay, good luck with the opking this month and good news that the bleeding has gone away!

Morning all

Coming to end of my mc. Started on Friday and was 5 weeks. Still bleeding v v slightly. Haven't gone onto work today and emailed my manager (male) and got a very lovely email back.

I won't lie though, all I can think about is getting back on the bus. Am I crazy? Do I need time to "recover"??

I am trying to feel encouraged by fact I know lots of people have had mc's and gone on to have healthy pregnancies.

I guess I don't really know where to go from here....

broody so glad the bleedings finally stopped.x

ginger good luck back at work! I know it's nerve wracking but hopefully you will find everyone is lovely and that it helps to get back to normality a bit. Although to me it felt very wrong at first, as though life shouldn't just continue as normal, in the long run it did help.

As for me I am so silly. Taking home pregnancy tests at 3/4 dope! Fish slaps please. This is the reason I never keep them in...that and the fact last time took 6 long years. I know I am not pregnant, there's no way it would happen in a matter of months for me lol...I think I just need to pee on all my ic tests at on e n get rid of them!

Welcome all the newbies, once again sorry you find yourselves here but hoping your stay is short x