If TTC # 2 has turned you into a nut job this thread is for you! (Part 4)

[sebsmummy1]

Hey!! We have had lots of graduates from Part 3, so let's get on the TTC bus part 4 and make this place a ghost town.

Destination Pregnancy, choooo choooooo

Excellent news Punky! Great that they are monitoring you and clearly looking out for you. Fingers crossed for you for tuesday.
Sebs good luck tomorrow morning.
Gosh fedup not long to go now, feels like it's gone quite quick for me if not for you! Ooh I've not heard of becks blue, I like becks vier, but I'm not drinking this month, have really been fancying some wine though, it will be a small silver lining if I get a bfn.
Well I have just sat and created a spreadsheet of all my cycle lengths, positive opk days and BD days. What has my life come to. It's actually quite interesting to see all the dates lined up though, every month we have had sex on cd11! It sort of looks like maybe I have been stopping too early on in my cycle too some months. Hmm we shall see what happens this month anyway.

Thinking of you sebs xx

Just leaving now. Will update when I know something xx

Just come out and the lady was so lovely. Said the miscarriage is complete, said now the bleeding had stopped I should start trying to conceive again. Said to ignore the pregnancy tests now.

If I don't have a period then to test in 6 weeks. If it's positive I'm pregnant, if I have a bleed before then that's my menstrual flow.

Feel absolutely fine and relieved it's all over xxx

Thats good news Sebs, am glad you are feeling ok, and yes am sure it is a relief.

So are you going to have a little break, or are you going to jump straight back onto the horse (as it were)?

I debated coming in to work today (I live in Staffs but currently working in London) as I was a bit emotional this morning, but glad I did as things are so busy its taken my mind off everything.. Can't believe its 1pm already! Roll on tomorrow morning..

xxx

An sebs, I'm glad you finally have a definite answer and the lady was nice but very sorry that it's really happened. Your attitude to all this is amazing, sending you very many un-MN hugs x

I feel like a bit of an imposter/lurker here but I really want to keep up with you all and hear all the lovely BFPs that you will be getting. I've been on a couple of other threads for antenatal stuff and I'm surprised how slightly hysterical some of them are, they make me stress about things I never would do normally! So I'd like to keep lurking here if you don't mind as, in spite of this thread's title, you are all very very un-nutty!

Sending you all the very best - congrats to fedup on passing your exams, brilliant results punky and ginger I'm smiling at your spreadsheet as I did that too! If you can, DTD every other day from cd8 - 19 and hopefully you'll cover all the bases! X

Cake I totally agree with you. Between you and me I found the antenatal boards horrible. Everyone was so wrapped up in their pregnancies that they were struggling to show any empathy to those that were receiving bad news. It was quite upsetting at times and that was before anything bad had happened to me!

I put it down to the feeling of detachment that comes with the internet. There is no way in real life that if someone came to you crying because they had found out that morning they has lost their pregnancy, that you would say 'oh no' and in the next breath start discussing your dinner plans.

Glad it's not just me sebs, I thought maybe it was the hysterical first time mums that were the problem on them but it isn't, some are on second or third and still really self absorbed as you say. I tried to respond to a question from someone on one about antenatal appointments but it got lost in a sea of posts about whether it was less exciting to be pregnant second time around??!!?! I saw your name on another thread the other day (already forgotten what it was about) and almost posted a Hi sebs but realised that would be a totally hijacking the op's thread as well as a bit stalkery

Out of curiosity sheer nosiness where abouts are you all? I'm in Oxfordshire.

sebs that's good given the circumstances and lady sounded nice too. And good you can try straight away. Keep and eye out for that ewcm as that's your clue to when ov and rest of cycle. I counter heaviest day of mc bleeding as CD 1 and think I ovulated perhaps a bit later than norm that cycle (based on cm). And I conceived cycle 2 so fx for you xx

I know what you mean about other antenatal threads. I'm on the preg after mc one and it's got people at ALL stages of pregnancy and some are very me, me, me and seem to have forgotten what the first 12 weeks of hell are like and on to whinging about feeling big and unattractive and tired. Who gives a fuck, you have a healthy baby in there and your body is meant to get big!!! Sorry, makes me cross as they (well some) have forgotten where they have come from and that's exactly where some others are now.

No symptoms today so feeling a bit stressy. Want to feel crap!

Ps cake I'm Surrey

Fedup I was the same about lack of symptoms - was at the docs this morning and she reminded me everyone is different and basically it really doesn't mean anything, so try not to worry (that very overused phrase, sorry!)

Punky the horse is well and truly being mounted lol. It's been over a month I think of abstinence, so we are making up for lost time

Thanks fed up, I think I do got so used to using opks that I've forgotten cervical mucus is an excellent indicator.

Hope I didn't seem bitchy talking about the antenatal board, I was just a bit shocked about how fast and furious it was there and sometimes to the detriment of others.

Can totally understand how lack of symptoms can make you nervous. I didn't even think I had any until I lost them!! Just a day at a time at this stage. Until anyone tells you different you are pregnant and it is fine xx

I have got bad heartburn so putting that down to today's symptom. Phew. I am a total nutter!

Took my son to buy some new shoes this morn (wow they are so expensive aren't they?!) and the woman in the shop was saying 'how many children do you have' and in reply to my 'one', 'well I don't know how you keep up with this one as he's got enough energy for at least two'. So maybe my crazy son is why I'm taking longer than I would have liked to have number two but perhaps a good thing as I might not have coped? He is a bit mad but always thought it was me and DH who thought that... But a few have said so recently that his energy levels are through the roof!!

Glad you are back in the saddle sebs. Ashamed to admit I now have an image of a chaps and cowboy hat wearing lady waving her pos opk around her head!!! Ha ha!!!

Hey girls, just a quick update, so the scan was probably as positive as it could be bearing in mind I am not even 5 weeks yet. We saw a 'sac', though after last time the EPU are being VERY careful with their words as to not name it a gestational sac.. It cannot be confirmed to be a GS (not a fake sac which I had with the ectopic) until we see the yolk sac/fetal pole which isn't usually until after 5 weeks. So anyway we have another scan next Friday (22nd) when I should be 6 weeks (barring any other issues).

So I am feeling a lot more positive now, though I still have a niggling doubt that won't go away until I see that yolk sac, etc. I just need to try to relax until next Friday!

FedUp I know what you mean about the cost of shoes (wow!) and also having a very active toddler. Our little boy never stops.. between running circuits around the house (like he is in training for a marathon), bouncing and jumping everywhere.. or just doing headstands while watching TV..

Sebs you made me laugh, am glad you are mounting that horse! :-) I also know what you mean about the antenatal boards. I only lurked when pregnant with DS, but thought this time I would be more of an active poster.. but have only lurked again both on the normal one, and the MC one.. as it all seems a bit manic. I much prefer this one.. maybe as we know each other and are more settled..

Hope everyone else is ok.xxx

Punky that is really really good news. Total understand the caution at this stage but I think it's as positive as it can be right now, so that should be celebrated.

Well I tested today and the line is significantly fainter. I think the weekend will be key here as it will be two weeks since the mc and people do seem to talk about two weeks after showing a significant drop.

OH is off this week so we are taking DS out every day (swimming this afternoon). It's good to have some time together. BDing is so much more fun that trying to keep a failing pregnancy inside me. That was ultimate stress.

Shoes are ridiculously expensive!!! We bought a Clark's measuring guide and measure him fairly regularly and get second hand shoes. I know once he starts being on his feet outside the house all day we will have to buy new shoes, but for the moment this world pretty well.

That's really great news punky, as you say all very positive for this stage and brilliant that they're monitoring you so carefully. Keeping everything crossed for the next scan.

My tip for toddler shoes - M&S! Good quality and definitely cheaper than Clarks.

punky that's good news!! Roll on next week for your next scan. My scan is a week today and couldn't come sooner but also bricking it that there will be nothing there or something non viable anyway. It's only been just over a week since my bfp and it feels like forever.

sebs that's a great idea re the Clark's measureer as at least if i can then buy other shoes / old season ones online as £36 is a rip off for something he will wear for a few months. Can you just buy them online - the measurer I mean?!

Glad the hpt's are getting fainter too. It's weird to write that but we know what I mean - you want to move on but silly hormones still saying you are pregnant. After my first mc the line was the strongest bfp I had ever had... Was so depressing. But soon went down so fx yours speeds up so your shagging becomes productive as well as fun!!

Yep you can buy them brand new off eBay for around a tenner I think. It gives you an instruction leaflet and then you go to their website, punch in the two measurements and you get the size.

I have loads of second hand hand-me-down shoes from my sister so it means I can choose which ones are correct for him without buying brand new ones.

It's defo weird looking for no line instead of scrutinising for the faintest one but I am stupidly optimistic, probably misguidingly so (that's not a word lol) but where there is hope there is possibility so fingers crossed indeed

Having a really emotional day today. My current project is in children's social care and I find it so tough hearing about the awful treatment of kids. Had to run to the toilet and had a bit of a sob about someone chucking bleach over their child. I know I'm hormonal wreck at the mo but I just hate hearing all this... Some people do not deserve children.

Fedup that sounds so grim, not surprised you had a sob, I would too. Hang in there, sending you un-MN hugs x

Hi ladies.
Fedup that sounds just awful. The unfair-ness ( not a word!) of it all just saddens me so much. Has anyone seen that programme Benefits Street? How is there any justice in the world when people seem to be able to just bang them out and then treat them like sh*t.
I have been catching up, but not posting recently, it's all just getting a bit too much for me. I just feel so down all the time, and I can't seem to stop myself from crying at ridiculous times, in the swimming pool or doing the weekly shop. TTC is always in the front of my mind but when I start to really think about how long it's been and how it's probably never going to happen for me it just gets a bit overwhelming.

Sebs a bit of a positive for you that it's all clear and you can carry on with ttc when you are ready, your attitude is amazing, I'm sure with such a positive outlook it will only be a short time for you again before you get another bfp! How are you feeling now it's closer to the weekend? Will you still be testing to check the levels or just wait for AF?

Cake hope everything is ok with you? And I agree with you on the marks' shoes! We bought a lovely pair for DD for only £8 last year, they were summer shoes really but they lasted her well all summer. Ah bring on summer....

Punky so pleased for you with the scan. Hope everything sails along normally til next friday and you can get some more good news. It's about bloody time.

Zippy how are you feeling? Have you got back to dtd yet this cycle?

People do seem to be very mememe on these threads don't they, it's nice to come across one that is full of just lovely, kind, supportive ladies.

oh poor gingerbread, why do you think it won't happen? Just a bad day, or do you always feel a bit like that? I have times like that too, but in more rational times I think it should. Saw a different GP for some antibiotics today for a persistent cough and he had obviously read my notes about having blood tests/ttc. I had the baby with me and out of the blue in the middle of listening to my breathing he said 'so how long did it take to conceive this one then?' I explained she was first month. The conversation didn't go much further but it was a little odd!

I have heard today two friends have had miscarriages/ectopics respectively today and that is v depressing. I also feel a huge guilt that I felt a bit down about their announcements of pregnancy at the time, though they would have had no idea as I obviously made a fuss and congratulated them, and was of course pleased. But privately felt a bit "oh, not another one pregnant before me again" and so feel very irrationally guilty now for ever having had the thought of why not me. They are going through something awful and I feel sorry for them indeed.

Nobody other than you ladies and dH knows about any of my troubles, I find it too hard to talk about. Also a close friend was going on for years about me leaving it too late (she had her brood in her 20s and seems to pride herself on this!) and now I'm 35 it seems like she would be thinking aha, I told you.

Yes, day 11 here, trying to do SMEP on sebs's suggestion, along with using CBFM, but must admit hard to follow a strict timetable when I know I won't ovulate for ages and it is showing low fertility on the monitor.

Fedup, how are you doing? x

Oh zippy and ginger I'm sorry to hear you are both having tough times. I hope on here we can provide both ears and empathy. I struggled with the whole of 2013. I really did. And I too have felt so 'why not me' with every pregnancy and then felt terribly guilty for those which weren't successful.
Just last night I was called on by my neighbour to babysit as her waters had broken and needed to go to hospital. Very pleased for them with their little girl now but her pregnancy has been tough for me. She found out she was pregnant when on holiday with us in June, the month my period was 3 days late and arrived two days after her bfp. Mentally v hard to deal with after my feb mc. Our dc are the same age. She's been great though and I am genuinely happy for them. She's had a tough year with other things too.

Weird for the gp to say that zippy. And people like that should just sod off as it's not always right for people to have kids in their 20s. They might not be settled in the right career or home or even have the right partner. Ingot married at 29 and no way i was having kids before then!

I'm doing ok thanks. Scan on Tuesday so just a few more days to go. Had a very stressed out day on Wednesday when was going to POAS. But don't know what I would do if line was very faint so decided to leave it. Crotch watch is still a bit ridiculous too.

ginger could you start focussing on something else? Something you enjoy? It's why I did the PT stuff and booked up our holidays and social calander. I know it only masks the constant thinking about ttc but I genuinely did dwell less as had to concentrate on something else. It helped a lot with this deep sadness and what you are describing sounds just like me. Big hugs xx

So it's my birthday and I cried lol. I'm one year nearer to infertility, no longer pregnant, woe is me. I've had lovely cards, haven't opened presents yet but I'm sure they will be gorgeous, we are all off put for the day yet I'm crying.

Ridiculous.

Massive hugs got zippy and ginger, so sorry you're both feeling sad too. Xxxxxxxxx