If TTC # 2 has turned you into a nut job this thread is for you! (Part 4)

[sebsmummy1]

Hey!! We have had lots of graduates from Part 3, so let's get on the TTC bus part 4 and make this place a ghost town.

Destination Pregnancy, choooo choooooo

Great news zippy. I honestly think if you can time your shagging a bit better you will get your BFP.

Have you done the SMEP? If not why not try it this cycle xx

I might try it. I still think I have a short luteal phase though, based on all the symptoms and the fertility monitor. But I think yes, will try a few more months yet before getting all the tests etc. did you do sMEP at all sebs? xxx

I kept trying to but it always seemed like the months I planned it my OH decided to disappear abroad at key times!!

We definitely did lots of the see at key times though. At least three days before OV and a couple of times after.

see - sex

They said to me if I had a big baby in there I may need c section, but it was on how close my children were, but I didn't think that's a prob now.

Ouch ginger, does that affect doing a no 2?! I recall when I was in theatre the doctor saying, 'we really need to stitch you up soon as losing a lot of blood and you may also lose control of your bowels forever' nice thing to hear hey?!

Sorry re af zippy. I hope you are ok. I did SMEP twice and almost killed us!! It's ok if the 3 days on a row bit falls fri through to Sunday but bloody hard if not!! We ended up doing part SMEP which was every other day and maybe every day with ewcm was at its heaviest! (Ugh sounds gross sorry).

Feeling very sick today which is a good sign in my book. I've got my PT exam on Saturday which I feel so unprepared for and scared will fail! Plus preg (no matter how early) somehow affects my spatial awareness and balance so I'm worried about that too. Oh well if I fail I fail. Can retake.

Hello lovely ladies. I am so pleased I popped in as fedup, your news has made my day! I hope so much that you get good news at the location scan and that that little one makes it all the way!

punky, great news too. Hugely hopful you have a better experience this time, I was completely in awe of how strong you were through all you went through with your ectopic last year.

sebs, well, I had bleeding this time from weeks 5-10, I was heartbroken, then hopeful, then back to sad for weeks. DH nearly had a breakdown! This time it has been good news so far, I am really hopeful for you too.

Hey bart! Has anyone heard from dildoos? She was so kind to me with my early mc last yr, I often wonder about her.

You poor thing Zippy were you shocked at how much damage having a baby could do? I mean, I knew it wasn't going to be easy and I would be 'different', but the extent and length of the damage is a bit crazy! Still, doesn't put me off having more....Yes they did say it would be quite a while after surgery before I would feel all healed and comfortable again and ready for sex, about 6 months I think, so it would be a large break from ttc. I'll just put up and shut up for a bit longer I suppose.
Fedup I have lost bowel and bladder control, but it's nothing extreme, I'm not incontinent (yet!) It does get quite sore when dtd all the time, and it makes a difference to the way I fart!! Pelvic floor muscles would help but I always forget to do them. I think you ladies now know more about me than anyone does!!!
I'm not sure I could manage SMEP either! I'm wondering if we've been dtd too often, so trying to hold back a bit this cycle. I've still not got my positive opk, cd 15 tomorrow, but we dtd cd 10 and 12, and will go again tomorrow.
Glad you're feeling sick Fedup!! Good luck for your exams on sat, but will you be able to work as a PT once you are qualified now that you are pg or will you wait until after the baby is born?
Are you still having bleeding Sebs?

Gingerbread I'm afraid I miscarried over the weekend. I'm absolutely fine though so don't worry. Already planning on TTC again as soon as the bleeding subsides.

I've done the crying and I now just want to concentrate on the future. Have a scan on Monday to check all the tissue has gone so there is no chance of infection. Then I've just got to wait for the hpts to give me a negative and I should be good to go again.

Xxx

Sebs!! What?? Oh god you poor thing. How are you sure it was a mc? Have you done more pg tests since? And there was me wittering on about my bloody vagina!!! I understand you not wanting to make a fuss though, you are coping admirably and so calmly, amazingly well. I'm glad you are feeling ok though and looking forward to the future. and for you xxx

*Oh sorry Sebs,, I read through it too quickly to take it all in

Yeah, it's shit but worse happens to other people and I had been prepared for it for ages. Just didn't want to piss all over the BFPs that happened at the same time on here.

It was definitely a full miscarriage and I checked my cervix this morning and it is low and open so no chance of anything other than a sad scan on Monday.

We have to feel blessed for what we have and I have a wonderful, loving partner and my beautiful baby boy and hopefully in the future another baby

sebs, I am in awe of you. I have no doubt at all you will have another one. Take care. x

Sebs you are spot on. We are blessed by tiny little adorable terrors!
Also in awe of you. Hope you get the all clear on monday, and can get back on track asap.

Gingerbread, have you tried being referred for some physio to help with the soreness? Mine was brilliant and I bought a pericalm unit off amazon as they recommended that at the hospital.

sebs, we are all thinking of you xxx

It's weird but I'm so happy with my partner and my son and our future that it's really difficult to be sad.

I have been through a lot of adversity in my life and have been to some hellishly dark places that I never thought I'd crawl out from. When eventually you are basking in sunlight the darkness is merely temporary shade. I guess that's hope I feel right now.

To give some perspective another lady on my (now ex) antenatal thread found herself unexpectedly pregnant after 6 years TTC. Very sadly she miscarried yesterday. I cannot imagine how totally devastated she must feel right now and I wish I could take her pain away.

We should be grateful for the problems we have as we would keep them in a heart beat if we had the option of taking someone elses xxxxx

Sebs you are so right. Wise lady! When i put my problems into perspective-i have so much to be grateful for, and i try and remember that when i get really sad and fed up with it all. Its not going how i had hoped and planned,but i have led a very happy and lucky life up to this point in the grand scheme of things. That said it is still hard to not give in to the sadness somedays. 6 years..that poor woman. I took 8 years to arrive so i hope there is still some hope for her in the future. Zippy i didnt even realise physio existed for that! Gosh my list for the dr just keeps growing...

Sebs you are so right. Wise lady! When i put my problems into perspective-i have so much to be grateful for, and i try and remember that when i get really sad and fed up with it all. Its not going how i had hoped and planned,but i have led a very happy and lucky life up to this point in the grand scheme of things. That said it is still hard to not give in to the sadness somedays. 6 years..that poor woman. I took 8 years to arrive so i hope there is still some hope for her in the future. Zippy i didnt even realise physio existed for that! Gosh my list for the dr just keeps growing...

Sebs am glad you shared with the thread - we are here for the good and the bad news and to hold hands throughout the ups and downs. I'm amazed at your positivity and ability to see the wider perspective. I could learn a lot from you! That is horrendous re the lady who was ttc for six years. Heartbreaking for them. We are so blessed with our little children and partners and I remind myself never to take them for granted.

I hope you are ok though sebs and glad you are getting on with ttc as soon as you can. I hope you get a bfp again soon. As it was a fairly early loss I hope cycles will be normal very soon. After my first mc at 12 wks it took 10 months ttc but only 2 after my last loss much earlier so have everything crossed for you. But don't put too much pressure on yourselves.

Girls I didn't tell you that both times I've got pregnant were months with cough medicine consumption. I worry my ewcm is too thick hence why I take it. Another gimmick to try if you fancy something new this month / have a cough??!!

If I pass the exam I will be a gym instructor level I still need to do my PT level 3 and exam for that is July. My mum is coming to help today so I can do some practice as very scared about failing as have not prepared as been so busy with normal work, being a mummy and just bloody knackered! Wish me luck.

Ps. Pelvic floor exercise work wonders. I too had weak bowel and bladder after ds and always had to dash to loo. It was scary but after religiously doing my exercises for a few months it was heaps better. Try and plan a time in for the exercises each day with something routine - like when you go to the loo or when get in to bed, driving, turn on TV or whatever. and Pilates helps too as it's about engaging all those muscles.

Pps. Thanks geta. And hi!! How many wks are you now?? Dildoos hasn't been here for a while but I did spot her on the BESH thread which I visited after my mc as was feeling dark but it the chat all moved too fast for me

Ooh id forgotten about the cough medicine. I put mine away when we moved in November, I shall dig it back out again!

I am going to look into doing some volunteering with a view to it helping my employment prospects in the future. I think getting pregnant proved to me it wasn't really not having another child that was going to fill the void I have currently. It is not working that is really causing the void, so I need to sort that out and then hopefully the baby will follow on afterwards.

Plus we have agreed that if I can't have anymore children we are going to get a puppy instead

Sebs I am so so very sorry. Your outlook and positivity are an inspiration and I am sure that it will happen for you in the future but it is brilliant you've decided to look at volunteering and to shift focus. Wishing you all the very best and sending you very unMN hugs x

Everyone else, I'm lurking and trying to keep up with your news but it moves so fast! Hope everyone is doing ok and as for smep I never had the stamina for that either! DTD every other day for a week over cds 9 - 17 i think and I'm very fortunate to have a BFP.

Hearing your stories about birth and issues post birth brings it all back - I don't think anyone expects it to be easy but wow I'm not sure I ever realised just what an effect it can have on you until it happened - I had a very traumatic labour with a failed forceps delivery resulting in emcs and that was extremely hard physically and mentally to come to terms with. I'll never be able to feel positive about it but just focus on the fact dd and I made it thanks to the very timely intervention of an amazing consultant and the excellent care we received.

I have my first docs appointment Monday. I stupidly poas the other day and the clearblue indicator thingy didn't say I was as far along as I thought so really stupidly stressed myself out. Did another one the following day and that put me a bit further along but still perhaps not so far as I expected. Anyway, I've decided to stop being an idiot and poas-ing as there's not alot to be done anyway if my hormones aren't where they should be! Far too early to think about birth options but a slight feeling of dread does lurk in the back of my mind about how to decide between vbac or elcs....but anything could happen between now and then so I'll cross that bridge when/if we come to it.

Sorry for the essay!

I'll keep lurking, best wishes to everyone xxxxx

Cake you are absolutely right about POAS. Makes no difference whatsoever to your outcome so stop.

These are things I have learned:

1. you can piss in a thousand sticks and get strong lines but it makes no difference to the outcome
2. you can make the clearblue digi go up in the correct increments but it makes no difference to the outcome
3. you can put your feet up, eat all the right things and take your vitamins but it makes no difference to the outcome
4. you can spot brown blood and receive assurances but it makes no difference to the outcome
5. you can even have an early scan and measure right for dates but it makes no difference to the outcome
6. you can even see a heart beat! But it makes no difference to the outcome

So you can see, the only thing I would advice anyone to do is get to 12 weeks and get a good scan under your belt, THEN that will make a huge difference to the outcome.

Hope that hasn't come across as depressing.

sebs, your positive outlook is making me a bit tearful, oddly. You sound brilliant, your friends must be lucky to have someone so strong around. It's hard re work, I love my work but I struggle a bit. I work FT but funny hours so I still get to do lots of childcare and work in the evenings and early morning. Sleep and tv isnt plentiful but I guess that is the same for all mums.

Gingerbread, the physio was great for everything. I sometimes think my pelvic floor is stronger than before I was ever pregnant which is quite a good result from where I was post birth and having no control. Fedup is right about the exercises, they show you how to do different types and it worked miracles for me.

Fedup when did you take the cough medicine? And how are you doing?