Eggcellent Egg Buddies - a thread for those IVFing in June/July/August

[EuroShaggleton]

You don't have to be crazy to be on this thread but it helps

(Ladies, I thought I would jump in and start a non-sweary titled fred. Feel free to turn the air blue now!)

Thanks, Euro. So... is this the 'sweaty' fred?

Checking in.

Me too.

So sorry tame :(

Im a lot of things, but I ain't sweaty.

Worst possible timing, DD is away for the weekend with friends. Its too quiet here.

God, I feel desperately sad.

if sweaty means we finally get a summer, I'm all for it.

Two days out and you lot fill-up a fucking thread. Bejesus.

tame I am so so so sorry. I was thinking of you today and was sending you some funktastic vibes. It's just a massive bag of shite that it hasn't worked for you this time. .

joos the Juicy half-dozen, we shall call them. Good bloody result that. The Spaff King must have really done his thang well on the day. I was utterly horrified to read about your episode the other day - I had tears in my eyes when I read it. I hope you are okay now.

karbs great result for you too today. Keeping fingers crossed for fertilisation.

Hmmmmmmm, sniffs new blood rach welcome. We fucking love a good old cunting swear here. If anything, we will PM you for not bollocking swearing enough. I did start-off on Fertility Fiends but it was a bit too pink and fluffy and dancing fucking emoticons for me (wtf is all that about ?). You will find it much more, erm, real on here. Dancing emoticons are bitch slapped out of town. Sorry about your history but here's to looking forward.

mejust where are you today lovey ? I worry that you may have gone all Waco because of the drugs and murdered half the people in Sainsbury's just for looking at you in a funny way ! Hope you're alright.

euro how did it go today ? Scan all ok ?

I had an impromptu scan today because of various things. I go into the room and immediately start stripping and thrusting my fanjo about the place. The sonographer looks absolutely horrified and witheringly says 'you can keep your clothes on as we can do an abdominal scan'. I realise that after all the investigations and ivf bullshit, I have become conditioned, institutionalised even. I hear the word 'scan' and start to fucking expose myself. I am dreading going abroad. As I go airside, there could be an incident unless I keep my wits about me (and my clothes on and my growler in her cage).

Hello to everyone else. Lovely shiny new Fred euro by the way. X

tame I am so, so sorry. Absolutely heartbreaking.

thanks euro - I'm intrigued by the impromptu scan 'for various reasons' but shouldn't pry..

juicy fucking marvellous!! Your head must be in a totally different place to where it was yesterday. You give me hope.

Welcome rachel. 2 on board - fantastic! I didn't quite get if yours was DE IVF, or was going to be, and then you've used OE. I'm heading for DE transfer, all being well, about 2 weeks today.

karbea great news re your EC.

AFM I'm okay, just counting the days and waiting and waiting.

AND nokkie??? How was the scan?? You are nearly 12 weeks now so must have been lots to see??

I hope the sonographer appreciated the flashing of the growler though. Mine was, shall we say, scruffy today. Just could not be bothered. Fucking hell, its like furry Bermuda shorts down there

Sorry, I meant nokkie not euro re the scan comment

Me too motor. Hope all is ok nokkie xxxx

We need good news!!!

Nokkie I can remember being in total shock when I was asked to do my first dildo scan, I'd assumed it would be on my belly like a pregnancy scan, I was totally unprepared. I must admit down there doesn't really feel like my own at the moment.

Jesus this thread makes me laugh!

Thanks motorcyclemama It's OE - signed the papers to start DE transfer nurse looks at scan and says ovary is here why aren't you using it? F knows what my eggs will be like I'm 39 and was thinking of setting up a direct debit from my salary direct to Morrison's alcohol department last month so we'll see Excellent about your DE scan.

Nokkie thank you, you're the reason I'm here, not on Earth like, just on Mumsnet but all the same pretty frigging amazing - I googled something like "real people doing IVF who can swear forums" and hey presto you're pretty near the top of the search!

Tame and and virtual company from me X

Tortie, I hate, hate, hate that you are on your own right now Please jump on a plane and come over here. You can come and marvel at the ' old castle' that was clearly built circa 1984 and I'll tell you about the crap caves we went to today where the whole tour was conducted in Czech and the only word we recognised was "stalctitties". Then I'll tell you about 'Peter', a dreadlocked student scumbag we met on the train back from the caves who, when informed of our donor IVF, looked at me and said: 'What?! So ze bebbee will not be yours?'

Really am wishing you some peace, sweetheart. It's a shit old journey, is this, but you'll get there xx

Shit "swear on forums" not "swear forums". "Changed" not "change". My brain has gone for a walk and not come back yet.

Ok ! I didn't want to come on here and blab - thought it was a bit insensitive really in the circumstances. But if you want to know.....

I got news on Wednesday that I am a haemaglobin C carrier. I had no idea of this (wtf would I ? I don't even know my own blood group). Anyhow, it's prevalent in those with Afro-Caribbean heritage (and bizarrely enough, those with Mediterranean heritage - there is a group in St Albans who have Roman heritage who carry this in their blood). My pa is Jamaican and my mum is English, so i am mixed-race, hence i have it.

It makes not a shit of difference to me in terms of my health, but if I have a sproglet with someone who carries haemaglobin C, the baby will have a 1 in 4 chance of having a form of sickle cell. The nurse wanted to see us urgently so that they could test the northern monkey for haemaglobin C. I doubt there is anything in it to be honest as he and his kind (Hobbits) have never left the northern shire (Hobbiton) until he and his brother came to London. I have seen the family tree too - that lot only moved between Scotland, Newcastle and the Lake District. They were like fucking lazy Bilbo Bagginses who just couldn't be arsed to come down South aka travel to Mordor to get rid of the ring. Sort of. Anyhoooo, so he had to have a blood test just to make sure. It panicked me a little bit because they wanted to see us so quickly.

So, the midwife was prattling on and making comments to the northern monkey like 'oohhhhh, just hop on my bed' and 'oooooooohhhhhhh, I'm not used to having a man on my bed' (it was like a shit Carry On film) and she said 'if you're having a scan next Wednesday then I won't listen for a heartbeat with the Doppler machine'. I thought about this for a while and then, despite myself, asked her to listen for one.

So I hopped-on the bed and she fucked about for ages trying to listen to a heartbeat. She couldn't find one. She then disappeared for fucking ages. So we're just sitting in her room thinking that it's all over. She comes back in and says that she's arranged an impromptu scan and then off we trot to the ante-natal scan unit. I basically sobbed my way through it all but it's ok. Heartbeat still there but my uterus contracted and the baby decided that it didn't want its picture taken (but would momentarily stretch and wave its arms about and then curl back up) so she couldn't take measurements to definitively tell me how far along I am. Until Wednesday, I have to go on the last scan which would put me at 12weeks on Sunday.

motor my GOD, the wait must be driving you potty. Nearly there now !

tame she didn't. She just looked horrified. She must have thought I was on the game something, the way I just dropped them without a second thought. What a slag !

Nokkie you make me laugh woman. So chuffed for you! Sure you don't want any ikklewikklesprinkles sending your way

NokkMeUp, 'various things'? What various things? You lost your car keys and needed to know if they'd slipped up your ass during a blacktastic floor-spin in Aldi?
Seriously, I hope things are okay with you and your peanut X

Motor, tell us exactly what's happening with you/your donor at the mo..

rach ikklewikklesprinkles MY CUNTING ARSE.

joos is the broadband wi-fi t'interweb in the arse end of back of beyond on fucking delay or something luv ? Aldi ? Aldi ? I am virtually royalty. I only funk in Waitrose whadda whopping lie

HEEEELP!!! Th'usband and I have just tried to open the Agolutin (progesterone oil) glass vial but when we snapped the top off, as instructed, it left a jagged, uneven ridge which made delivery of the liquid into the syringe almost impossible. Some of the oil was left behind in the ampule, which meant we had to repeat the process and inject the remaining half-a-ml a second time! We can't be doing this every night but we tried snapping another ampule top off and it did the exact same thing leaving a jagged neck. Any suggestions for tomorrow night?

Ok juicy but it's not very exciting! I had a scan on Tuesday where they found that my womb lining was appropriately thin (2.9mm) so I started on progynova 2mg three times a day, to make it thick again . I go back on Wednesday 19th to see if it is thick enough (8mm minimum), and if it isn't, they'll give me more oestrogen but in patch form. Donor egg collection due Monday 24th, when I guess I'll start progesterone pessaries until egg transfer, possibly 3, hopefully 5 days later.
I asked about my donor's progress, but they were very unforthcoming. I have to guess that all is going okay for her too. I am hoping she responds well, as we only get 50% of her eggs, but pay lots. I'm starting to think that I should have gone for your type of set up where you get all the eggs!
It seems to be going so painfully slowly.

juicy have the glass vials got a black spot on the neck or top? If so, that could indicate the weak spot in the glass. Try making the break there by pushing the top of the vial away from you with your thumb. Obviously I can't see your vials, so don't know for sure, but I'm a nurse and have done lots of injections.

Motor, thanks for that, I didn't want you to think I was ignoring your journey just 'cos I'm full throttle into mine. It may seem a slow process to you but I remember our discussion about your first, unproven donor - who you went on to reject - and that only seems like yesterday to me. Does your clinic use the embryo monitoring machine (the embryoscope)? Don't worry about your donor's egg quantity; I know it's a cliché but it does only take one quality pairing of egg and sperm (and you're getting a beautifully young, undamaged set of eggs). We are so, so lucky...please don't worry

I'm a little concerned that my one and only scan was on the 18th May How on earth do we know what my womb lining is like?

Motor, x-posted. Yes, the vials have a red spot on the neck and yes, we flicked it away from us with a thumb. This we did twice and both times a jagged, uneven fragment of the neck remained, which made it impossible to fully fit the syringe end into the neck for withdrawal. Do you understand what I mean?