I'm feeling the pressure... Must prove myself amusing and suitable for BESH. And provide distraction from AE type badness..
I shall try to incorporate questionnaire and the tale of woe that brought me here. Be gentle with me.
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Do you like gin? (This is compulsory, you must say 'Yes')
Yes. But cowboys like whisky, don't they? I don't like whisky. My first failure.
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Men - are you a gold digger or a cradle snatching cougar?
Cougar. GHJ (ginger hairy jock is all of 6 months younger than me)
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Baybee-making - to put a baybee in your tumtum, which hole do you use:
a) weewee
b) poopoo
c) foofoo
d) none, you just pray to the baby Jebus.
Well, biology a-level allows me to confidently say c, but I suspect I might have more luck opting for d. And I don't believe in the baby J.
- Testing - when someone wonders if they should test for updiff (pg), do you:
a) bellow 'POAS!' at them non-stop and punch them repeatedly in the kidneys till they wet themselves anyway.
b) Sprinkle them with babydust and send them hugs and kisses on lickle baby angel wings.
Well. This is part of the sorry tale. I may have previously frequented a differing chat site. I may have got a little bit irritated at the constant inane questions. I may have given the lastest poor poster a piece of my mind. Suffice to say I won't be going back... So. A
- Is R2D2:
a) an adorable robot from Star Wars.
b) the source of all evil.
If he'd promise to appear on time, at reasonable intervals and with minimum fuss, then I could buy a as the correct answer. As it is, b. obvs.
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what colour are your walls?
Err, white. With a couple of "feature" walls with wonky wallpaper I haven't bothered to paint over in the 5 yrs I've been here.
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Number of pets?
- Sadly. GHJ is allergic. I'm considering cat napping the anfield cat. I could look after him better.
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Inappropriate (read: weird) crush
Eddie Izzard.
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Lesbian crush?
Izzy off Greys Anatomy.
- What are your views on camping?
Yeah. Fine. Last time remembered the blow up mattress and pump, but forgot the plug. I was not in good books
- How much money have you spent on sticks you then urinate on?
i) Oh nothing, I'll probably catch first time and then get the doctor to confirm it.
ii) Over 100 quid
iii) I opened an account on ebay solely for the purpose of purchasing sticks
Don't want to think about it. Let's just say middle option. It's not the first.
Assuming my old friend arrives next week, I'll be hitting month 25 TTC. With not a sausage of any result. Have PCOS, had clomid, had drilling, having more clomid, got ivf referral in pipeline. Mardy, spotty, and fed up with rancid "it's been 2 months & I think there's something wrong" wittering. After stalking you gals thought I might fit right in...
So... The hoss is grey with a star spangled saddle and goes by the name Apollo
I can't manage the cowboy speak, but I'll leave you with a word of cowboy wisdom- Don't squat with your spurs on.