Wizard are playing and the tinsel is up. Come into the BESHmas office party for some inappropriate photocopying and brief, regretful relationships!

[AriesWithBellsOn]

Evening BESHes! Don your tinsel and Christmas tree earrings and dance into my office for some rocking around the Christmas Tree. First one to snog Brett from Accounts wins a glass of warm Country Manor and some Christmas snacks. May we getting SWI over the Festive Season and announce our wins in the New Year

In you come! Festive newcomers welcome - just search for and fill in the BESHtionnaire and submit for approval.

A few ESH have a child already and are trying for number 2. I am in fact pregnant but I like it here and am also in De Nile about actually having a baybee. boo has smallboo already and moley has just got diffed with number 2. pone is actually on her second ESHbaybeeboy. Greedy caaaah. But anyway, having one already does not mean you are not allowed to get upset or frustrated when winning a number 2 does not prove easy.

Sounds like you have had similar experience to quite a few on here, there has been an unfortunate run of miscarriages this year. It is quite shit really. But you will get there.

Red wine is good. Your vodka story is rather similar to why I never drink whisky.

Thanks KatAndKit, I'll make myself comfy here then.

Yes I do fancy the Hamster, I'm not ashamed to admit it. Tis the only reason to tolerate Top Gear in my opinion.

Hi Bauble, I did really go to Twatley. It was DH's grandmas 90th last month and the family all went to Watley Manor for afternoon tea. Their address does not mention Twatley but I was most amused when it showed up on the Satnav.

Can't do pics as I'm techno-incompetent, you'll just have to imagine it. I will tease you all further with details of our themed garden. We have a landscaped bit with big boulders and spiky grass and a water feature which is a massive chrome pyramid, with no water as the power is cut off.

Hamster is short, but so am I. I'm also not fussy obviously

I bet you watch Top Gear and fantasise about Sechsing with the Hamster in one of the flashy sports vehicles!

I am just envious you all have houses...

Hello newbie btw :)

Have you thought about changing your name to TwatleyTeaPlease?

bugs you are really going for it with the sechsing!

Good work on the sechsing Baubles, I haven't really got back on the ttc wagon yet due to erratic cycles. According to fertility friend the next shagfest should be over Christmas. Hope dh's tonsillitis clears up before then, although I will jump him anyway.

I'm not sure what to say about your friend. She is being a bit thoughtless and hope she comes round soon.

That is rubbish,Pone. I think a lot of people don't know how to handle m/c. I confess I tend to give friends space when they miscarry but maybe that just makes them think I don't care.

I think its a bit bollocks if it's a close friend, although I do get the whole people don't know what to say thing. Sometimes you don't want people to say much, you just want some friendly distraction.
I would just let it go to be honest, be a bit hacked off in your head, but just say sorry about your cat and shall we meet up sometime in the next week or so when you are feeling better.

Bugs I think our new friend blacktea had read the Fred and knew I was going there & that's why she mentioned it

Maybe your friend feels awkward, I know my friends find it really hard to empathise with my whole situation as they aren't in the same place as me (wanting a baybee). I used to get upset about it but now I think it's better to have fun times with them. It's difficult for them to know what to say as they are often worried about upsetting me more by saying the wrong thing. It's an unspoken rule that they will always listen but they never ask & I'm kind of ok with that now. Maybe just appreciate what she's got going on & talk to her honestly about how you feel - it worked for me.

The droid is imminent. I can feel The Rage approaching. TBH I'd rather it arrive now then at least it will be gone for posh hotel weekend.

I didn't realise you were going Frosty but I did see it mentioned when I skim read the fred. Enjoy your duuurrrty weekend away, tis a lovely place and I am v jealous that you will be staying there.

Welcome tea you sound BESH like to me aside from the gin thing...
I too am well-jel of the themed house actually I'm weljel of anyone with a house but yes the themes sound fabulous. I totally get both crushes. I am willing to watch TG for the hamster and the sexy cars vroom vroom Did you know he grew in my and Boo's home town?!
Good news, they've found a couple of nice potential rentals not far from home or work. going to have a look round. Feel quite positive about that side of things.
One of my friends told me she's 11 weeks diffed. can't even be mardy though, sounds like she's got hyperemisis, on the verge of going into hospital.Bless her.
sunny I like your sod it attitude to the Droid.
I got in my jammies at 6pm. too early?

Can I just point out to the two who have come here and advised more sechs (both of whom incidentally have a couple of sprogs already, or at least 1 1/2) that I wasn't saying Boohoo, it's Christmas and I'm not going to have sex because we'll be at the in laws over Christmas. I was merely pointing out that I wasn't particularly looking forward to the prospect.

I think that's fucking allowed actually

I agree aries nobody usually really wants to have to have a timed shag chez the inlaws. If you have to do it then all the fun is gone. It's not quite like when you aren't actually trying and you think you are being terribly sneaky and a bit teenage having a shag when the parents/inlaws are downstairs. That can actually be quite fun. But a duty shag is an entirely different matter.

Yes indeed and I feel for dor in particular who is with her folks all the time In fact that was the deciding factor for us as in do we rent/stay at Dad's once MSB's swimmers are back and swimming rapidly we'll need plenty of our own space to shag.
We have had epic sechs fails at times due to stress and not forgetting MSB's lowered libido. I never expected to get updiffed on those cycles when we didn't hit the egg timing though...

I guess we have just got used to it. It is what it is! Fortunately my family are quite easy going and we have laughed about it. Although, The Mister did comment that he sometimes wonders if we are going to be mid-shag and see my Auntie Josie standing at the end of the bed going "Oh, you don't want to do it like that! We like doing it like this". A truly disturbing image!

I am totally unrepentant about being honest about how many times we do the sechs. The times I've been devastated about getting the droid have been the months where we have done it more than once though. But that's allowed is it? because I deserved to get diffed?

FWIW when I caught with smallboo it was quickie while packing for a holiday and we only did it once that month depite being on holiday.

I also think that it's allowed to talk about how hard it is to make time to do it, have issues with doing it, fit it in around work etc etc. I don't think that whinging about trying to fit it in around Christmas and in laws is a bad thing. And asking for some tongue - in- cheek advice about stealth sechs is fine too.

It's also very unfair to make comments about someone else's relationship. It takes two to Tango, and personally I prefer to have consensual sechs. There are some things that one doesn't WANT to share with the world on a message board, no matter how long they may have been posting there.

Kat Your mince pies sound absolutely amazing. I really really want one.

Ok. I now have the rage. Is it ok to say to another BESH "if you stop drinking/lose weight/stop taking drugs/start doing it in the foofoo/stop smoking/lie upside down for AT LEAST 45 mins after sexy time" or any other bullshit that makes her feel bad about a failure to conceive? I THINK NOT. Particularly if you have already managed to persuade your desiccated ovaries to produce an egg which has miraculously become a baby. 33% of infertility is ''unexplained': that's your actual diagnosis. Have all those people just not shagged enuff?

I make no apologies for repeating what I once wrote to one of my fave BESHes;

What I do know for sure is that the quantity and quality of the sex you're having has no bearing on whether or not you're likely to have a baby. Nor is a win guaranteed if you spend pointless amounts of time and money weeing on sticks, or having sticks poked into you or eating the right food or not drinking or smoking or consuming caffeine or or or...Anyway, you get the picture.

One of the things I'm finding at the moment is that people either overtly or secretly think their way is the best way of being a mother, and I think that applies to TTC as well. People will always say that one should be shagging all the time for a win - well, actually, that would screw my chances as TNB's sperm count would just be non-existant without time to rebuild. Others are convinced that one just needs to shag at the right time - but the CB thing isn't infallible. Yes, you could have more sex, smoke less, eat less and obsess more. But what good would it do? Pregnancy in the end is a miracle and a gamble and a million-to-one chance and that's the terrifying delight of the whole business. It's like trying harder to win the lottery.

Blackbottom

Oh Blacktea I am so sorry, I forgot to welcome you. Hello :)

And Drom I liked your post so much that I'd like you to follow me to the stationary cupboard. :o

Oh my. Drom I think I love you.....