Waiting to try to conceive

[Amonstercooper]

Another thread for those who are waiting to try for a baby. It doesn't matter how long or short the wait; why you are waiting; or how many DC you have. All are welcome.

Old thread here.

I would just like to add something that has helped me with the waiting.

I started a new healthy lifestyle plan with optimal health for ttc in mind at first. I've been eating healthier foods and started going running, and I've lost a fair bit of weight already.

I have found that the running outdoors clears my head and I sleep better, and I've been doing a lot less brooding over things. I find myself reading websites about nutrition and fitness plans instead of reading mumsnet and other parenting forums. It has all taken my mind off the waiting to ttc somewhat. In fact I think of the running as a 'silver lining', because I love doing it and I won't be able to do it when I get pg!

So, even though I started out doing this for my possible future baby, now I feel like I'm doing it for me. When the ttc time comes around my body will be ready and I think my mind will be ready too, as I won't have been stressing so much about it as I was before.

Thanks Wannabe, that all sounds like good advice. Do you have a date set for TTC? Or are you still waiting for your finances to be in order?

I'm not into running (traumatic memories of cross-country at school) but have been trying to lose weight and cut down on the booze and general unhealthiness a little bit in preparation for TTC (although am drinking a glass of as I type this!). I think I also read somewhere that physically fit women tend to have easier pregnancies and births.

I'm also quite into doing meditation at the moment, I find it helps really clear the mind.

No date set yet. Get out of debt and have an exciting holiday first, is our plan! :)

Can I join in? I am WTTTC and finding it very difficult to decide when to take the leap! DH and I have been together 10 and a half years, married for 3. I?m turning 31 this year and he is 34. We have a nice house with a back garden, a dog, a cat ? So you can see the next logical set p is to add a baby! (I don?t mean to sound smug or complacent, I know it might not be that easy!).

After years on the pill, and depo provera before that, 3 years ago I got a copper IUD (my cycle took over a year to regulate) so in that sense I should really be ready to go once I decide to whip it out! I recently also saw a holistic doctor and got a day 21 test (progesterone levels all good) and she recommended upping my iron intake, taking folate and multi vitamin supplements, which I?ve done. So we have all the ducks in a row ? I know DH is getting clucky ? I just feel absolutely paralyzed by indecision!! How do you decide when is the right time?! At this stage I?ve sort of decided we?ll TTC in September/October for the following reasons:

(1) It gives me a couple of months to lose a few kgs. My BMI is healthy but on the high side and I don?t want to go into pregnancy carrying extra kgs on top of the baby weight.
(2) If we conceive within 3 -4 months the baby would be a winter/spring baby (we?re in NZ) which works out well for school year here and means I?m not preggers during high summer ? can enjoy 6 odd month maternity leave in spring/summer.
(3) We are planning to renovate the house and it gives a bit of time to save some more $$ for that and for ML.
(4) I?ll turn 31 in October and I figure now or never.

How did you decide? Was it just pure cluckiness? I almost wish my hormones would just take over. I?ve always imagined having children but have never really yearned for little babies ? I love toddlers and see myself as having 2 or 3 kids but the though of having a tiny human being totally dependent on me Freaks Me Out. I also worry about the effect on the dynamic of my and DH?s relationship (this is probably silly) ? but having been happy together for so long what if I don?t like the change? It?s not like you can send them back? Argh!

Hi Gennz - a lot of what you say sounds familiar.

From reading other people's posts, I think some people are just hit by a wave of broodiness.

However, I never had this when I was younger and tbh if I was 25 again I would put babies off for a few more years and go and travel the world. However, I know that I definitely do want children, and that it has to be sooner rather than later as I'm not getting any younger. Now that I've come to the decision I am impatient to do it right now - but this might be because I'm generally quite an impatient person.

All of your reasons to ttc in September/October sound sensible, and it gives you a few months of freedom to get used to the idea. I think the average time to conceive is more like 6 months, so be prepared for it to take a little longer and have a summer baby instead. Otherwise, if it wouldn't be a disaster if you got pregnant a little earlier, you could do what DP and I are doing which is not actively trying, but not preventing either.

Yes I am similar - once I decide it's time to TTC I know I will be a nightmare, I will want it to happen straight away. So while I'd be happy not to get pregnant until 2013, I figure if we start in Sept/Oct, if it doesn't happen immediately I won't start properly stressing out/becoming militant (poor DH) until Jan/Feb.

I almost envy my sister/friends who had a slip-up and the choice was made for them... I have always been far too pedantic re contraception for that to happen. (I sound like a control freak don't I?! )

Well I'm officially confused by the really mixed signals I'm getting from DH. I really thought we were getting closer to TTC then last weekend we had a huge heart to heart. DH admitted he didn't really feel ready to become a father but had resigned himself to the fact that it would happen in the not to distant future. I have to admit I was somewhat disappointed and confused, especially considering he's recently decided to drop the contraception and rely on the withdrawal method. Really starting to feel like its one step forwards and two steps back.

But then tonight he came home, said he hadn't been feeling great this week so stopped off on his way to stock up on some vitamins and supplements. He's only gone and bought himself some conception vitamins! What the hell am I supposed to make of that?! I'm so bloody confused!

Hi all, sorry, I've been away. And we're now actively trying. Thanks for the company and good luck all

Brilliant news Discowomb! Wishing you all the best with it, be sure to come back and let us know when you've got your BFP!

hello - just peeping in to say bye. This thread has been so supportive and helped me cope with the baby crack. Looking forward to SWI now and hopefully meeting some of you on a 'bus'

Amonstercooper thank you for everything! How have you been? Hope to bump into you on another thread.

Redstrawberry wishing you lots and lots of luck with your SWI - I hope you smack the rat first shot. Fingers crossed you will be one of the last people I wave off this thread as (touch wood) I will soon be leaving myself. I have put in what is probably the longest stint of all time, but DH and I are planning to start TTC after our USA trip... and we leave next Friday! We've even been house hunting this week, looking for houses with extra bedrooms, gardens for swing sets and primary schools nearby!

All the best xxx

AmonsterCooper (aka Leftwingharpie, AmandaCooper, AwayinaMangerCooper)

Discowomb lots of luck to you too! Congratulations on starting TTC!

oooh leftwing that's great news! How exciting

Ahhh! Big smile on my face .... Really excited to see you on a bus leftwingharpie all aboard for 2013 ;)

Hope you have a fab trip xxx

Congrats to those who are leaving to SWI

Am hoping I'll be one of you soon!!

Leftwingharpie congratulations, I bet you are so excited but noooooooooo you can't leave, you're the founder of the thread!

You must promise to only venture as far as the door of our waiting room and keep popping your head in every so often to see how we're getting on.

Enjoy your trip, and good luck with the house hunting :o

OMG I've just for the first time ever realised I AM BROODY!!
I wanna baby!!

gotta get a job though and gotta get a turkey baster (sp?)cos my DH has delayed ejaculation. at least I have myself an action plan :-)
god I hope I'm on the right thread....never ventured from AIBU/relationships!!

Can I join in? D has just turned 2 - I always said that 2 years was the minimum before I'd start TTC a second baby, and now I'm dithering and going oh, maybe when she's 3... I am broody as fook, we were in children's A&E with her last week and I kept ogling other people's newborns. But I'm also aware of how much more freedom I have now that she's off the breast and sleeping through most nights. I want to wear my lovely clothes and go out and eat rare steak and not be shattered all the time. And I had horrid SPD towards the end of my last pregnancy, which is v likely to come back worse the second time round, so I'm scared for my mobility.

I'm half wanting to enjoy a bit more freedom before I go back on the hormonal rollercoaster of pregnancy, and half tempted every single time I climb into bed to turn to H and go "Oh fuck it, let's just start trying". I think the sensible thing to do is wait. But I miss my bump!

waves well DH and I are officially now TTC.. albeit the lazy way so I say goodbye and good luck to all of you waiting! My waiting period went quicker than expected, hope yours does too

Can I join you? WTTC#3... first with DP. I am ridiculously broody but dp wants to wait. We're just about to move to a new house that =is just about standing= needs work. My career is going amazingly well at the mo. So he is right, but still... I want a baby!

Came off BCP in Dec, as getting headaches/migraines, so using the tried and tested withdrawal method... personally hoping for a happy accident :)

Just thought I would pop in and say goodbye as we are now officially TTC

Good luck to you all

Oh, I am so happy to find this thread! I have been loitering around the conception thread but not really felt I can get involved because we aren't quite trying yet.

No children but been with DP for nearly 10 years. Planning to start trying from July for several reasons, primarly work related; ensures maternity pay and the time I would take off for maternity would best suit my industry but it also marks our 10 year anniversary so why not?! :o

I have been losing weight in preparation and researching, hence ending up on MN! I am quite clueless as to what I am doing but I figure that's normal. We plan to start the lazy way and take it from there.

Hi everyone, I'm new to MN. My DH is away with the Army and I've been thinking about starting a family more than ever. We've been together 12 years (married for 7) but with so much time on my hands I feel like getting pregnant is taking over my thoughts. DH is away for another 3 months, then I hope we'll be ready to start trying. In the mean time I've been 'researching', when I read this thread it made me feel less guilty about being on the MN, website!
I'm normally super organised, so it makes sense that I've already looked into; maternity pay, nurseries, primary schools, options to work part time, epidurals........
Hope I'm not the only one feeling like this!

Didn't realise this kind of thread existed. So happy to have found it!

Have been with my Other half for 3 years and he keeps telling me I need to be ready for children within the next 2 years because he wants kids before he's 30... but I've become all broody now! Unfortunately not really in the position to TTC what with me being made redundant and stupidly returned to education...

So may I join your thread?