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Original poster

Come into the BESHt youth club in town, all you sad and bitter crones.

1000 replies

Ariesgirl · 28/03/2011 22:21

Enter the darkened youth club, where desperate 30-somethings who have been TTC since the eighties determinedly try to recapture their teenage years: their snogs with Darren from maths in the corner of the disco, the waft of Impulse, the slow dances at the end of the night, table tennis tournaments and the queue at the tuck shop for black jacks, Panda cola, fruit salads and Wham bars. Bop to Ride on Time, Love Shack and Vogue with Madonna and we'll see if all those sweaty hormones and pheromones can do the trick.

OP posts:
BrownB · 09/05/2011 00:18

Aw Rie - happy to help. Sorry about itchy horribleness. And I agree with Cunty - the Canesten pills aren't really that great. Wish they were.

BrownB · 09/05/2011 00:21

I also wish I could convince myself to get of my arse and go to the fucking gym. Or to the pool. Or running. Or some damn thing. Grrr. Happy Mother's Day to all who are in those parts of the world. And now I will stop cluster posting and go to sleep. If I can prise "Shit My Dad Says" out of my DP's hands.

Night ladies.

starcuntmole · 09/05/2011 00:24

Night. Wink

BrownB · 09/05/2011 00:26

Not Boo but Booty* - three posts above. Blush

InTheSunshine · 09/05/2011 07:26

Brown I love Shit My Dad Says. Bluddy brilliant.

BrownB · 09/05/2011 09:20

Off to get a massage today. Grin Working this weekend, so I get to play today! Grin Grin

Shit My Dad Says is very funny. My DP actually went looking to find the twitter page and reported back in awe "he's actually JUST like that."

Rie - how goes it? Hope that your run in with the dreaded Thrush is your last. And that your mother has now left you in peace.

BB - how are you getting on?

I wish I was good at creative stuff like.. limericks.

cakeandcava · 09/05/2011 14:57

Aaw Brownie I was just reading through the past ten-or-so pages and now I'm touched that you're remembering me

Hi all, after the initial 'holy feck I just won' palaver I had a bit of a freak-out with everything and had to take some time of teh internetz. But doing fine.

Kat if you're reading, I'm so so sorry for what you're going through. It is horrendously shitty. I hope you're getting on ok and looking after yourself.

everyone commiserations on various droids that have come and gone -and special sympathies to Rie for the yoghurt scenario. Did you try the garlic? Did it work?

Pone did you end up getting the cat?

Original poster
Ariesgirl · 09/05/2011 15:42

Hello cake. How are you?

Haven't done the garlic - I can't bring myself to shove garlic up my foof. AIBU? It seems to be on the wane anyway, thank fuck!

OP posts:
AlpinePony · 09/05/2011 15:48

aries you are just jealous because your mine frightens vampires and meanwhile mra has been slipping it up my normal one.

cakes alas, his people were overjoyed he'd been found and came to collect him. I think we will return to the shelter in the summer for pussy acquisition.

AlpinePony · 09/05/2011 15:48

Mine = minge, even my phone is scared.

MadameBoo · 09/05/2011 17:11

Haw Haw.

BrownB · 09/05/2011 19:11

Pussy acquisition huh?

Glad to hear all is well Cakes.

cakeandcava · 09/05/2011 20:10

Rie I am surprisingly well, fanks, which I suppose is a good thing. And YANBU to not want to shove garlic up your fanjo -although I was curious to hear about whether it worked or not... Glad fannyfungi is clearing up though.

Ponee at pussy acquisition. I guess it's good he had some people looking for him who were happy to have him back.

Rotten fish blinis, mmmm

Original poster
Ariesgirl · 09/05/2011 21:12

Seeing as no one in Style and Beauty will answer me (honestly, do the rest if MN know we are barren and therefore resist replying to us in case we infect them with Barren?) do any of you hags know of a really good handcream for ancient and wizened hands? My skin is so rough I could sandpaper with it. And I have always been blessed with large hands and feet. So ladylike. Sigh.

OP posts:
owlbooty · 09/05/2011 21:18

I don't know, Rie , but would dearly love to. I have perma-eczema across my knuckles, which, coupled with the wrinkles, looks just FAB.

I used to feed my tropical fish garlic when they were feeling off-colour. It was very good for getting rid of everything evil. Pliz do not insert tropical fish. That will not help.

MadameBoo · 09/05/2011 21:19

I always buy my Mom Helping Hands from Lush Rie, she loves it. I've got some Clarins stuff at the mo but it's not that great tbh.

Original poster
Ariesgirl · 09/05/2011 21:19

Someone has now, and apparently Elizabeth Aden 8 hour cream works well, and is good for eczema.

Someone else recommended injecting fillers Hmm

OP posts:
MadameBoo · 09/05/2011 21:20

Hee hee, S&B is a 'special' area :o

rocketleaf · 09/05/2011 21:21

Body shop hemp hand cream is very good. But it's a tenner a pop so we stock up when it is half price or 241. TB gets very dry hands and swears by it.

cakeandcava · 09/05/2011 21:26

Kiehls handcream is amazing. Sadly so is its price tag. But if you're looking for a treat...

Original poster
Ariesgirl · 09/05/2011 21:28

Actually I have now had 10 replies! And everyone is really nice Shock. Serves me right for prejudging

Am just off to exfoliate my hands with a loofah and sugar scrub before buying some very expensive cream.

OP posts:
Original poster
Ariesgirl · 09/05/2011 21:29

And thank you to the BESHes too :)

OP posts:
BrownB · 09/05/2011 21:49

If you really must know... Garlic up the fanjo stings. Sort of mixed results. Not to be considered unless you've had thrush for a few months at least.

Original poster
Ariesgirl · 09/05/2011 21:57

That's what I thought. Same I imagine with tea tree oil too.

OP posts:
kat2504 · 10/05/2011 08:50

Hello schlags! I am officially back now, havent felt much like posting in the past week but thank you for asking after me :) Hospital experience was even more awful than expected but hopefully it is over now and I will finally get a negative hpt soon. If i have to have a D + C after all that I will be mightily fucked off.
Went to see the GP yesterday, who has decided to refer me to gynaecologist for recurrent mc investigations so that is some progress at least. He also told me that I have a rampant urine affection. This result was returned to them ten days ago! Am on AntiBs now but am imagining all sorts of awful things about the infection causing the mc. Think this is nonsense though as had already had two dipstick tests which were clear before that sample was sent off. Dipsticks don't pick everything up though. In my heart of hearts I think it was just a blighted ovum and there may never have been an actual baybee as I never had any real pg symptoms for long.
So, we have got through the worst of it together. The Gp has given me some pills for the panic attacks but I had that last time and I know it will fade in time. We are going to try again right away in case we have to wait ages for testing and just take our chances one more time. Hopefully the tests will not reveal any problems, or something that is easily fixed. I'm taking this week and next week out before I start looking for some temporary work. If I still had my old job I wouldn't be ready to go back full time yet so I'm trying not to feel guilty about sitting at home! Besides there is loads of dr quinn on at the moment and I have a guilty crush on Sully!

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