Waiting to try for a baby

[AmandaCooper]

A continuation of so many threads spent waiting to ttc that I've completely forgotten what number thread we're on.

If you're waiting to ttc, stop by and say hello!

Hi all!

I've been trying to ignore the tread in an attempt to reduce broodiness! Unsuccessfully I might add.
DichotoMous there's definitely no limit I'm aware of so no need to hover in the doorway!

Hi all!

Mind if I hang out in the waiting room for a while?

DD is 10.5 months.... I ebf her but now she mostly eats solids I have periods again (although gone on strike this month.... odd after 3 months like clockwork, and no, not preg!).

Decided to TTC again from Jan 2012.....

Lots of reasons for the wait, including me going back to work on Monday (arrrgh!) and needing to accrue a year before another mat leave, DH having handed his notice in to be a SAHD and therefore needing to wait until Sept until he will be working again as he's a teacher and, also as a result of teaching, DH wanting to avoid a summer baby.

Sigh.....

Already bored of wating! Not helped by dreading the return to work...

Excellent, I will pull up a chair!

I went back to work today after the summer hols and there seemed to be loads of people who were now obviously pregnant after the 6 week break. Hmm.

Meant to do this:

Thischarmingmum(35) WTTC#3, DH happy with 2, Cheshire.
Ratata(27) WTTC#1, waiting until married, Edinburgh
AmandaCooper (33) WTTC#1, DH not ready, Bradford
notthehippopotamus (28) WTTC#1, DH not ready, Essex
Tostaky (34) WTTC#3, need to find new home near good school, London
Monal(31) WTTC#1, waiting to come off the drugs, Paris
HeavensNetIsWide(27) WTTC#1, saving/DH career, Northants
Snowy27 (27) WTTC#1, waiting till after the wedding (Only 50 days to go!), Manchester
halterskalter (33) WTTC#1, need to do a year in new job, London
Truckdriver (32) WTTC#2, not ready yet for #2 just yet, but still broody!
WaitingForMe (28) WTTC #1, TTC as of wedding night (December)
GattoRosso (27) WTTC #1, waiting for the new year (for some reason)
Legallyblond (29) WTTC #2, need to accrue another year for mat leave #2, DH taking a year off, planning a sept baby!, London/Essex

My periods had better bloody well appear again! Always been regular as clockwork before DD, then no probs the last 3 months, just no appearance this month (and I did a test - def not, plus I know what preg feels like and I'm not!).... DD has just gone back to bf practically all night as a result of dropping all day feeds... great.

Oh and just to say, notthehippopotamus.... I wouldn't count on it!!! I thought the same when trying for DD and had sort of "planned" for it to take months... 2 weeks later I got a positive!

Hi there!
Mind if I join you all?
DH and I have agreed to TTC right after Christmas - we're going on holiday so it sounds like the best way/environment to get started!
This will be our first - we never planned to have children, but it's like I've become a walking cliche..... mid 30s and now desperate to have a baby! (And the desire was really only triggered 2 years ago after an illness - amazing how something doesn't seem important to you until it suddenly might be taken away from you?!).
I've been waiting all year so far, and only 4 months to go..... I'm so impatient!! It's so difficult waiting any longer. I've decided to come off the pill immediately before we go away, so hoping to benefit from the surge of hormones that can sometimes happen. Fingers crossed!!

Hello guys,
It's nice to be back, and my job is safe!
My husband is not ready yet, but then a very good friend said no one truly ready.

I hope every one is ok.

Lw

Welcome legallyblond and alexeliza, and welcome back littlewater - great news that your job is safe. legallyblond I'm glad I'm not the only one who feels like they don't want a summer baby. I'm sure really it shouldn't matter, but I'm a teacher too and it just doesn't seem like a good time. Don't particularly want a middle of winter one either, especially around Christmas as it's such a bad time for a birthday. But that means ruling out a lot of cycles - I should stop being so fussy. A good excuse for the waiting for a bit though, if I've got to wait until spring. Well, maybe around Christmas for a September baby - that would be ideal! :)

Ooohh - dilemma! My DH has suggested starting now ttc (bearing in mind it took considerable time to convince him that we should have children)..... his father is quite elderly and his health is failing, and we'd always hoped that our having a DC would give him a focus, something to look forward to/"hold on" for (he's definitely looking forward to the idea of being grandparent again!).
We'd originally decided to start straight after Xmas.... although I'm impatient and would have loved DC yesterday (!) the timescale appealed to me (in my rational state) allowing us time to pay off all credit cards and me to finish loosing the weight that I have been slowly doing (sounds mad I know, considering I'll probably put it all back on once pregnant).
I do have to wait at least 2 months anyway, to finish a course of medication for a skin infection (can't be taken whilst pregnant). So trying to get my head around starting the end of Oct rather than end of Dec.....
I really liked the idea of a September baby (if only mother nature would be so obliging!).

Oh my dear goodness I am supposed to be off MN but I had to come on and say hello to Legallyblonde - you were on the waiting thread when I first joined, which is coming up to two years ago! And I'm still waiting to TTC #1!

Amanda poor thing! Don't you just want to ditch his procrastinating arse sometimes?

Interesting to see people trying to avoid a summer baby - there's been a lot in the press about babies born in different months having different characteristics. Apparently spring is the worst time to be born, as it increases your chances of having an eating disorder or alcoholism (!), and they think it's due to lack of sunlight during winter while heavily pregnant.

Both my partner and I are(were) spring babies ha! I think it's too much to consider that bit of advice along with anything else - I'd try any time if my partner was ready! The only thing I'd try and avoid would be a Christmas baby, I think.

So I've actually started couples counselling because I'm so frustrated about waiting. I really want to start trying in November as I thought we agreed last November (my boyfriend says we agreed just to talk about it this November). So far it seems helpful for our relationship generally, but we haven't talked about the waiting/wanting a baby thing yet.

Thischarmingmum(35) WTTC#3, DH happy with 2, Cheshire.
Ratata(27) WTTC#1, waiting until married, Edinburgh
AmandaCooper (33) WTTC#1, DH not ready, Bradford
notthehippopotamus (28) WTTC#1, DH not ready, Essex
Tostaky (34) WTTC#3, need to find new home near good school, London
Monal(31) WTTC#1, waiting to come off the drugs, Paris
HeavensNetIsWide(27) WTTC#1, saving/DH career, Northants
Snowy27 (27) WTTC#1, waiting till after the wedding (Only 50 days to go!), Manchester
halterskalter (33) WTTC#1, need to do a year in new job, London
Truckdriver (32) WTTC#2, not ready yet for #2 just yet, but still broody!
WaitingForMe (28) WTTC #1, TTC as of wedding night (December)
GattoRosso (27) WTTC #1, waiting for the new year (for some reason)
Legallyblond (29) WTTC #2, need to accrue another year for mat leave #2, DH taking a year off, planning a sept baby!, London/Essex
pjani (29) WTTC#1, boyfriend not ready

Can I ask how we can get added to this list at all (apologies if I'm asking out of turn)?

Alexeliza just copy it paste it and add your name!

Pjana tell me more about the couples counselling at once! I've been looking into booking a Relate session for DH and me.

Thischarmingmum(35) WTTC#3, DH happy with 2, Cheshire.
Ratata(27) WTTC#1, waiting until married, Edinburgh
AmandaCooper (33) WTTC#1, DH not ready, Bradford
notthehippopotamus (28) WTTC#1, DH not ready, Essex
Tostaky (34) WTTC#3, need to find new home near good school, London
Monal(31) WTTC#1, waiting to come off the drugs, Paris
HeavensNetIsWide(27) WTTC#1, saving/DH career, Northants
Snowy27 (27) WTTC#1, waiting till after the wedding (Only 50 days to go!), Manchester
halterskalter (33) WTTC#1, need to do a year in new job, London
Truckdriver (32) WTTC#2, not ready yet for #2 just yet, but still broody!
WaitingForMe (28) WTTC #1, TTC as of wedding night (December)
GattoRosso (27) WTTC #1, waiting for the new year (for some reason)
Legallyblond (29) WTTC #2, need to accrue another year for mat leave #2, DH taking a year off, planning a sept baby!, London/Essex
pjani (29) WTTC#1, boyfriend not ready
Little water (27)WTTC#1, DP not ready,also wanting a march baby.

I definitely recommend couples counselling Amanda. We're going through Relate, and even though their office is scabby and it's totally mortifying ringing and showing up the first time, it's actually fine.

For me this is a really serious issue in our relationship. I haven't put it to my boyfriend like this, but it is an issue I could break up with him about (even though I love him to bits) because it is so fundamental to the life you want to live. Sometimes I'm tempted to give him an ultimatum but have resisted so far!

However, in my head, if he's not ready to start in November (a year after he said 'just wait a year') I will seriously consider leaving in the early new year.

I think we've had one consultation and two or three sessions so far, and our counsellor is great - really down to earth. It's brought out a number of underlying things, but in a good way. We actually haven't spoken about the baby thing yet, but I'll bring it up at either our session this week or next week.

Overall I recommend it anyway as I think it's bringing things out in the open. And my boyfriend is pretty hopeless at communicating, he clams up under stress (easily) so this is slowly prying him open.

Will let you know if it actually works!

Let me know if you call Relate, I think it can only be beneficial.

Thanks Amanda!

Thischarmingmum(35) WTTC#3, DH happy with 2, Cheshire.
Ratata(27) WTTC#1, waiting until married, Edinburgh
AmandaCooper (33) WTTC#1, DH not ready, Bradford
notthehippopotamus (28) WTTC#1, DH not ready, Essex
Tostaky (34) WTTC#3, need to find new home near good school, London
Monal(31) WTTC#1, waiting to come off the drugs, Paris
HeavensNetIsWide(27) WTTC#1, saving/DH career, Northants
Snowy27 (27) WTTC#1, waiting till after the wedding (Only 50 days to go!), Manchester
halterskalter (33) WTTC#1, need to do a year in new job, London
Truckdriver (32) WTTC#2, not ready yet for #2 just yet, but still broody!
WaitingForMe (28) WTTC #1, TTC as of wedding night (December)
GattoRosso (27) WTTC #1, waiting for the new year (for some reason)
Legallyblond (29) WTTC #2, need to accrue another year for mat leave #2, DH taking a year off, planning a sept baby!, London/Essex
pjani (29) WTTC#1, boyfriend not ready
Little water (27)WTTC#1, DP not ready,also wanting a march baby.
AlexEliza (34) WTTC#1, agreed with DH to wait until end Dec (holiday), London

Hi all, I am waiting as DH doesn't think we can afford baby number 2 yet. I don't want my 5 year old to be an only child much longer. Also, we're all getting older...

Anyway, I guess I will have to wait for a few more months.

I hate still being on the pill though, as I can't pretend to myself that I might be preggers. I have been feeling sick and sometimes faint for 2 weeks now, but I can't be pregnant as have had a normal period. Sigh.

pjani ok I told DH I wanted to go to Relate and he said he would but he thought it was a waste of £50. I suggested he could just not refuse to talk about it instead and that would be free. So we're going.

Well done! Hope it goes well, keep us updated.

I'm 25, my fella is 30. We're already married and mortgaged but it's still too soon for him. I have been desperately broody for the past year. To make matters worse, my mother constantly hints about the possibility of grandchildren when we visit. I feel ever broodier and more miffed, and he feels like she's blaming him. I've never told her he's the one holding us back from doing it, but I think she can sense my baby-craving.

Currently dh says we can start ttc once we've built an extension to the house as it's only got 2 bedrooms. I'm pretty worried that by the time we've saved up 30K, it'll be rather late. I'd rather have two children sharing a bedroom, than a great big house, dried up ovaries and a feeling of emptiness in my life.

People tell me I'm daft to be so bothered aged 25, and that I have plenty of time left. But I don't see the point of waiting until I'm 30, and just hoping I'm not one of those whose fertility has already waned, when as far as I can see I already have a lovely husband and home right now. I think men just don't understand that feeling you get inside you. I never did until it happened to me! Logic doesn't enter into it.

Hi

Can I come and join you for a bit, I have a DS aged 10 and a half months and am waiting until March next year (although I may crack sooner) to conceive no.2. I am so so broody but personally want a 2 and half year age gap. Plus DH needs a new job so this will give us chance for him to find one.

Spammarie It's not daft, children don't have to be expensive. In fact they get more expensive the older they get. At least with DS I can kit him out in head to toe ebay and he doesn't know the difference.

Welcome Spam and Tribble, feel free to add yourselves to the waiting list above!

Bumping up for Buddhagirl!

Yay :D

I thought we were waiting 6 months. We agreed: Baby in about a year and a half, so I said il be needing to come off contraception in about 6 months ish, Yes he said. Turns out DP wants to get married first . Now I have nothing against this! Ideally I would like to be married too. However, I know he hasnt even started saving for a ring. We are informally engaged, but the longer this goes on the less patient I am getting. Personally I dont want to start planning a wedding without an engagement ring to show off. We have been together 8 1/2 years! My parents are elderly, Dads got mild dementia and I really want them to experience gandchildren. So now I have to wait for him to properly pop the question and save and plan and get married. Im not happy. I asked him why he said yes and he said he doesn't remember saying yes and it was a miscommunication. Knew I shouldn't have got my hopes up .

Thischarmingmum(35) WTTC#3, DH happy with 2, Cheshire.
Ratata(27) WTTC#1, waiting until married, Edinburgh
AmandaCooper (33) WTTC#1, DH not ready, Bradford
notthehippopotamus (28) WTTC#1, DH not ready, Essex
Tostaky (34) WTTC#3, need to find new home near good school, London
Monal(31) WTTC#1, waiting to come off the drugs, Paris
HeavensNetIsWide(27) WTTC#1, saving/DH career, Northants
Snowy27 (27) WTTC#1, waiting till after the wedding (Only 50 days to go!), Manchester
halterskalter (33) WTTC#1, need to do a year in new job, London
Truckdriver (32) WTTC#2, not ready yet for #2 just yet, but still broody!
WaitingForMe (28) WTTC #1, TTC as of wedding night (December)
GattoRosso (27) WTTC #1, waiting for the new year (for some reason)
Legallyblond (29) WTTC #2, need to accrue another year for mat leave #2, DH taking a year off, planning a sept baby!, London/Essex
pjani (29) WTTC#1, boyfriend not ready
Little water (27)WTTC#1, DP not ready,also wanting a march baby.
AlexEliza (34) WTTC#1, agreed with DH to wait until end Dec (holiday), London
Buddhagirl (26) WTTC #1, Waiting to get married, Hants