Waiting to try for a baby

[AmandaCooper]

A continuation of so many threads spent waiting to ttc that I've completely forgotten what number thread we're on.

If you're waiting to ttc, stop by and say hello!

Amanda I'm sure you'll be fine. In fact I bet most of the ladies on this thread will get their BFP before I even get round to start trying- feels like I've been waiting an eternity!

Oy watch it newbie, Bebe and I are the queens of Waiting! Your DP will need to have a serious case of Fear of Fatherhood before he can touch Mr Jones and Mr Cooper!

Well said AC DHs FOFF is deep rooted! Think DD must have put him off, she's the best birth control ever! I should lend her out for a fee! :o Next month will mark my 18th month of waiting!! :(

Pickle - that does sound worrying but I'm sure it will be fine. Chances are really quite rare that you both have it aren't they? Fingers crossed for you. :)

Snapshot - welcome! :) Pull up a sun lounger on our 'beach' we'll have some fun while we wait! :o

Just watching Monday's OBEM while DD is still sleeping! Can't watch it with DH around, he gets all squemish & rolls eyes & makes sarcastic comments!

Hi Picklehead try some of this skittle vodka - had it in a vodka bar and it's absolutely lovely .

And I'm definitely a queen of waiting too, I'm coming up to my 3rd year! When I first got with my partner I had such powerful, instinctive desires to get pregnant - I never even wanted kids before getting with him but all of a sudden I was a prisoner of my instincts, getting myself so wound up and emotional each month when the period was due secretly hoping to be pregnant and yet so fearful in case I was. After the first year with being with him these instincts settled down a bit. I guess you could say I've been "waiting with approval" for the last year or so - obviously we weren't discussing having children when we first got together and I couldn't really tell him outright "I get so crazy every month because I'm secretly hoping to have your baby" lol (I was also on the pill at the time, which didn't stop me from being able to convince myself every time that the pill might somehow not have worked this month!).

haha amanda, wasn't trying to outdo you on the waiting front!

Actually thinking about it maybe FOF is why DP asked me to marry him, its definitely given him a couple of years grace while we saved for the wedding!! Oh well, after this summer there'll be no more excuses - I hope!

I can't beat three years! I was completely meh about babies right up until my wedding day. As soon as I got the ring on my finger I turned! Been waiting now for 18 months for DH to catch up. And on this thread just over a year.

I honestly think we're nearly there. The kitten we got for Christmas has suddenly turned DH all mother hen - and he has even stopped smoking. He says he's nearly ready - so watch this space!

Bebejones are you propositioning the newbies?

NO! Not in 'that' way!!

3 years is a very long time to be waiting! 18 months has seemed an eternity! Really need DH to change his mind, I think I might actually be going slowly mad!

AC - V exciting that your DH is finally 'turning a corner'! :)

Oh, Bebe, I've been hooked on OBEM as well! Two of the midwives from the show have also written a book, which contains some follow-ups from Season 1 as well as a lot of new stories.

But I've missed a few episodes - is it coming out on DVD, does anyone know? I haven't been able to find it.

Thanks for the warm welcome, everyone!

The chance that I'll be a carrier for CF is 50%, as my sister is a carrier. DH's chance is about 4%, which is its incidence in the general population. So the chance that we're BOTH carriers is about 2%.

I don't know when I'll find out - Great Ormond Street needs to get in touch, then I need to have the bloodwork done, and then it'll probably be six weeks or so until we get the results.

So I'm not the only one! Sloe gin anyone? I'm waiting to TTC in April and have been literally counting days off on my calendar

Picklehead - Check on 4OD online, you might be able to find the episodes on there!
Must be frustrating waiting on the hospital!

I am so hoping I can convince DH to TTC soon. He still doesn't know if he can come with me to my consultant appointment, and things are kind of hanging on that right now!

Bebe, AC - hello...been MIA again as soooo busy! Almost broke up with OH last week - ...but all is well now.

Hello everybody else...i was on the last forum and the story goes: Never wanted kids, been with OH for almost 7 years, in October something switched and now i want a child. No explanation for this. Announced it to OH and everyone else in November. I'm waiting for him to come to terms with this idea and give me an answer by June as i need to come off anti-depressants and have the coil removed. So...Picklehead...I'll hopefully have a Summer 2012 baby too...ha ha...and that is really worrying about the CF...my only concern is my endometriosis. I'm 28 in Feb and i think i'm getting on a bit to be trying for my first!!!

I've seen OBEM only twice...so i looked at the birthing videos online...they're great...Picklehead...there are loads of videos here:

lifebegins.channel4.com/

AC - VERY exciting about OH impending compliance...good luck...x

Astrozola I hope you didn't post about it in 'Relationships'?! It's mad in there!

I have only just managed to kick my unhealthy addiction to watching birth videos, so don't encourage me! I do watch OBEM though and poor DH gets forced to watch as well.

Getting the kitten has been a big step. I know that sounds stupid and a kitten is trivial compared to a child, but it's focused our minds on important questions about how to parent and involving our wider family in childcare. MIL is round kitten sitting today cause DH has gone to a meeting in Wales.

Sorry what is the CF??

Hi - excited to have found this thread and hope you don't mind if I join?

Dh and I were very, whatever, about having children up until the last year or so and then when I turned 30 something changed and suddenly I feel v broody.

We have to wait until the summer though to begin trying as I am keeping my fingers crossed that I get my temporary teaching job made permanent. Financially we just couldn't afford to have a baby otherwise

My SIL has just had twins, she is 26, and that makes me very aware of my advancing age!!

Just wish we could get on an ttc and see what happens!!

Also, I have very irregular periods so I'm not really sure how that will affect me - but I know it won't be good.

Nice to meet some fellow waiters!!

Cheers

Woohoo a crown, just what I always wanted . And AC I understand where you're coming from with the kitten, me and OH got a puppy together and for us it was an expression of our commitment to one another as well as a test to see how well we could raise a life together (plus I just really really like dogs .
I've actually gained more confidence in my abilities thanks to getting the puppy, and have also come to realise that I'm in fact going to be the soft one out of the two of us (I'd always imagined I'd be more of the disciplinarian).

I totally agree with the kitten idea! Getting one definitely helped speed things along with us! I also recommend borrowing other people's cute babies!
DH and I looked after my friend's (beautiful!) baby daughter for a day. Having an actual baby there made the possibility that we could have one ourselves more real, I guess. Previous to that he'd been saying 'in a few years...' but after that we discussed a definite time to start TTC. Don't know if it would work if the baby hadn't been so well behaved though!

Hello,

Yes I think coming off pill and charting is a good plan. I told DP this morning that with we off the pill its up to him to remember the rubbers seein as its been my responsibility for the last three years to take my pill. He is fine with this, so we shall see.

We got cats! We got two, one of whom is sitting next to me as I type. I wasn't going to refer to us as mum and dad to the cats and just kept with our names but DP started calling me Mum when talking to cats, he is broodier than he realises or lets on I think.

I borrow my friends 13 month old son. He is so gorgeous and just starting to talk and associate words with people and things. When he was last over DP was playing with him so brilliantly and playing the guitar for him, ovaries skipped a beat then I think.

BroodyRhi DH calls me mum when he's talking to the kitten! It must be a good sign.

Pinkflipflop I don't think irregular periods is necessarily a worry, as long as the time between ovulation and the first day of your period is constant.

It's not long until the summer. That reminds me of an exercise we did on this thread where we all listed stuff we were going to do before starting ttc. I'm going to update mine:

Go to the dentist
Have a smear
Go to Alton Towers
Vegas trip (possibly!)
Go to dance festival
Pay off overdraft

Is it ok to join in?

Have been with my DH for 8.5 years (nearly 3years married) I have had the "talk" many time with DH, the responce was always not yet, but just before christmas I had a tearful talk, the he admitted that he had been thinking about it and has decided that we should start a family!!! I got very excited, then he informed me that we should start in the summer. It is going to be a long wait. but I'm happy as he came to the decision all by himself!!!

I'm glad he's finally been able to give you a time Thornton77, it's definitely easier when you have a timescale to put to it imo. Which reminds me, only 6 more months before I can ttc

I like the idea of a list of things to do before we ttc. Think mine would go along the lines of:

1. Get a new job
2. Have a smear (thanks for reminding me, keep forgetting to book)
3. Get mine and OHs finances under control
4. Get married
5. At least try to get my dissertation published (been over a year now of not finding the time to work on it)

Can I join you ladies pls?

DP agreed last yr that when I'm 28 (which is 10 days away) we'd TTC no 2. DD will be 6 in March and that enough of a gap!
Have to wait a couple of months tho, a cyst on my right ovary ruptured this week so have to wait for that to sort itself out then we're good to go

Waves to newbies!

Soooooooooo, all of you who have sucessfully convinced your OHs to TTC...how did you do it? I have tried crying & wailing, sulking, silent treatment & when all that failed I had a rational conversation with a few well thought out arguments/points thrown in! :o DH keeps moving the date! At first it was going to be Xmas 2009, then it got 'put off' until May/June 2010, then delayed again until Xmas 2010, at which point he decided that he doesn't want anymore...possibly ever...maybe...he isn't sure!

Getting really hacked off & now he won't even talk about it. Those from previous threads will recall our last conversation & the 'promises' he made. Well, he hasn't even bothered to contact his therapist. And has stuck to his 'diet' for 5 days! When he said about getting a take away tonight & I said 'No, no take aways' he threw his toys out of the pram, sulked & had a right go at me telling me he was an adult & he would decide what he did and did not do! Well, excuse me if I want you to lose weight so you don't have a heart attack or develop diabetes! :( This whole TTC situation is pushing a wedge between us. I just know he won't come to the consultant with me. Work always seems to come first. Although he would argue that he puts work first so he can 'provide' for me & DD!

Feeling really fed up!

There is only one thing on my pre TTC list, (have had smear, lost weight, stopped medication):

1. Convince my stubborn as hell DH to give DD a brother or sister.

Sorry for the whinging me me me post. I'll be back when I have cheered up for a proper catch up!

I had this with my DP I told him it was a dealbreaker in our relationship - he knew I'd been ready to have another one for a couple of years. He kept putting it off saying the time wasn't right - there is never a g'good time' to have a baby you just deal with it. Told him if he didn't want anymore it wasn't fair on me or DD because he was thinking about his lifestyle how having another would change that. He knew it was something I was prepared to walk for and he soon came around as he said didn't want to lose us and having another one wouldn't make that much difference :-)

Frustrating would be an understatement, although I'm not sure how else to describe it. Do you know why it is he's so unsure about it? (sorry if this has been covered elsewhere)