Howdy pardners, grab your corset and mosey on down to the BESHt Little Whorehouse for all Wannabe Differs (30's)

[LadyGoneGaga]

Why howdy pardners, tighten your corsets, put a feather in your hair, pull on your boots and garter (*nipple tassles optional but welcome) and mosey on down to the BESHt little whorehouse in all of Diffas. Where the finest 30?s TTCers will fulfil your every need. There?s firewater -?Hendricks-- on tap and we?ll WOOFL you until you can?t WOOFL no more. Yeehaaw.

Menu
Straight up ? the best rootin?, tootin? baby making sechs in 7 counties
Cougar style ? like Doggy but with claws, acceptable for updiffage
Rodeo ? to be followed by a quick dismount to avoid leakage
Sherrif style ? with spurs on
Backdoor ? Recreational but not recommended

Specials
Dildocam ? Half price this month only
Needlework/Foot massage ? for those who like it a little bit woo
Zinc shooters ? to keep the posse on the straight and narrow
Positive thinking ? by the glass
Eggwhite omelettes ? to keep your energy levels up
Gentlemen are kindly reminded to leave all prophylactics by the door and to kindly leave the cowboy juice in the receptacles provided as directed.

I hope that's crotchless, owlie? Or at least some nice leather chaps with no pants like <a class="break-all" href="http://www.google.co.uk/imgres?imgurl=www.babble.com/CS/blogs/famecrawler/2008/christina-aguilera-crotchless-chaps.jpg&imgrefurl=www.babble.com/CS/blogs/famecrawler/archive/2008/02/19/drrty-xtina-misses-her-crotchless-chaps.aspx&h=400&w=275&sz=49&tbnid=AvJFGO-yuKIR-M:&tbnh=271&tbnw=186&prev=/images%3Fq%3Dchristina%2Baguilera%2Bchaps&zoom=1&q=christina+aguilera+chaps&hl=en&usg=__3UUCkTv2Zfhxa8SIKqnzPlOxOlc=&sa=X&ei=VmbJTMPkMYjg4AaM7MH4AQ&ved=0CCAQ9QEwAA" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">this ?

Hello Ooozy. Yes, you must have a pash on some filthy lesbian slut - it's the BESH way and you won't get diffed without it .

bitey if you haz broken DC...

why do you guess Cheryl?

ohhhh....Chezza....

I have been to the Chiro again! This time he fired a gun thing into my buttocks, affixed me to a machine which punched my back hard and repeatedly, but somehow didn't hurt, not like the minuscule needle he inserted right into my scapula, it felt like. I grudgingly handed over the £32 with shaking hands.

Top fittest cowboys so far are:

1. Daniel
2. Heath
3. Paul
4. Brad (a bit pouty for me)

Cass, I wish you had been around in the war. Your speeches are as good as Churchill's This was her finest hour.

Does anyone/everyone know Karl Jenkins The Armed Man? I'm listening to the Benedictus it now and it's adding to the general emotionalness of the moment.

Cigar in mouth? Er... I think this falls into the same category as salty 's meringues.

Welcome Uzi9millimeter RaspberryNipples PowderedEggOva and BrownBackside (again!). OozingPus I give 7/10 for the questionare, I'm afraid points were deducted for not providing the full form. However, this may be to prevent other noobs from easily copying and pasting and not finding it themselves, so have a introductory formal boob gropage from me.

I'm getting my eyebrows waxed tomorrow. Last time I went (the day before my wedding) the evil woman on the benefit counter asked me if I'd like my upper lip done too, so as to be smooth for the photos! Seriously what a cow! Haven't been since and going elsewhere tomorrow. But am now paranoid about upper lip. I am super fair skinned and blonde so the hairs are very fine and light BUT they are there. And I think they may be multiplying. So if I got them waxed do you think it would make em worse ie grow back thick and dark? I know this is nothing to with conception but FDH has said that if I grew a magnum PI as a result of messing about then we would probably SWI a lot less.

Urgh, I hate to tell you but it looks like Scorps has been using that cigar Rie. Rie if you'd bothered popping up to Devon for two minutes, I'd have done all that buttock punching and needle stabbing for nowt. Think on next time - we are in a double dip recession you know.

aries why did the chiropracter shoot you in the behind? I am cross posting a lot today so missed this.

Oh dear me.....Rie why would you say that about the cigar, especially so recently after the extensive discussion about "cigars"...

EEEEEEEEEEEEEEUUUUUUUUUUWWWWWWWW about the cigar comments.

That is all I have to say about that.

I managed to persuade him to shoot me in the buttocks and don a cowboy hat after explaining about the current Palais theme, Bitey. He was awfully obliging about it. Nah - it was some device they use to spread tension or summink. Cass will be able to tell us no doubt. Thanks for the offer Barbie? are you qualified in chiropractic or are you a quack?

Gah. apostrophe fail. Sorry. Pliz to punish.

Won't, obviously.

Just for <a class="break-all" href="http://www.google.co.uk/imgres?imgurl=www.toptenz.net/wp-content/uploads/2010/01/magnumpi.jpg&imgrefurl=www.toptenz.net/top-10-tv-detectives.php&usg=__rw4J65dDHNZZ2I5WCxtT-AN9sUw=&h=400&w=316&sz=30&hl=en&start=0&zoom=1&tbnid=BEvSGlg19Z56-M:&tbnh=143&tbnw=95&prev=/images%3Fq%3Dmagnum%2Bpi%26um%3D1%26hl%3Den%26client%3Dsafari%26rls%3Den%26biw%3D1280%26bih%3D618%26tbs%3Disch:1&um=1&itbs=1&iact=hc&vpx=648&vpy=96&dur=683&hovh=251&hovw=198&tx=118&ty=154&ei=W2_JTNW9F8qH4Aa8svyIAQ&oei=W2_JTNW9F8qH4Aa8svyIAQ&esq=1&page=1&ndsp=23&ved=1t:429,r:4,s:0" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">you Bitey

Gah!

arialautomatic am I also running the risk of an extremely hairy chest? Will just have the eyebrows done I think, and not tomorrow because today is in fact Thursday and not Friday.

Cowboy c0cksuckers anyone?

Ummm yes of course I?m qualified, here?s my certificate Now stop simpering you silly girl and pop your clothes off, nothing I haven?t seen before, yes yes all chiro appointments should be nude, shouldn?t they Cass?

Yes I am, thankyou for noticing Bitey. Oh I see what you mean, yes I'll have one.

Yeeeeeeehhhhhhaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrr! I've just had some Good News, which I'm not going to elaborate on, but it's fucking fucking good.

To Salty and Ocs - you're lush!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

erm...don't want to cause problems but I don't think the Chiropractor is meant to be nude..

Bugger.

although, what do I know?

Good work Shesalady on the new fred. I am quite partial to those tassles I tell you.

Ariel - being shot in the backside sounds like absolutely no fun at all, AND you paid for it!

Cass nice speech. Also brought a wee tear to my eye too. You are good.

Biteme - I'll have a cowboy c0cksucker if you don't mind. I need to steady my nerves. I had my first drop of alcohol last night since February, and fear I may have liked it more than I remembered!! I'm not sure now is the time to drink in earnest. Mr O, on the otherhand, is eyeing up the wine collection that has been amassing since I bannedhe stopped drinking alocofrol in June. He had Chumpers followed by Whiskey last night, and was ready to open some wine I reckon!

Salts yes does feel tres odd. I still have zero symptoms so aside from the tests I have no 'evidence' of anything. I 'treated' myself a digital test this morning. Was quite a novelty to not have WIAR and dip the stick. Have cancelled the FC and white goods test that were scheduled for next week, so I'm hoping and praying this BOC does not go anywhere.

Rierie can we have a clue?