We're All Going To IBESHA: Last minute budget holiday fun for 30s TTC. Pack your string bikini and your oversized shades and get on board.

[Saladbomb]

Last call for flight SWI101 to Shagaluff. Sangria laced with folic acid on tape. Fake tanned Club reps will be dishing out the 2 for 1 cocktails, dressed in nothing but the most miniscule budgie smugglers. The pit will be manned by sleazy but virile Spanish waiters to provide your every need. Lets see the summer out in BESHley style, IE: starting a bar fight, drinking the place dry and falling over in a heap at the end of the night.

Just wanted to wade in on the CBFM chat - as I am a fan. 18 months of baby fail and bought one of these and bang, updiffed 1st month. I was using ovulation piss sticks previously and like head the CBFM put me ovulating a couple of days out (can't remember whether it was earlier or later). 2nd diffment used it from the off and it took 3 months. Now, I am not saying it will work for all but as I say I am a fan...

salty I've always counted day 1 as first day of proper blood whatever time it arrives (which is made easier to work out because I don't do spotting beforehand). Sounds like that generally makes me wrong too. I'm not sure how much difference it will make to calculations, it can only be a day out in terms of cycle length/LP length and for calculating ov would only make a difference if you ov on exactly the same day every month (which I certainly don't, oh that life was that simple!) Other clever people may be able to explain why though.

Thinking about it fertility friend just asks whether you're bleeding is heavy/med/light, not what time it started, so they must be working on it not mattering what time of day it was.

I think the CBFM booklet gets you to count the morning as the first day (if you start in the afternoon/evening) becuase it works on the principle that you check your piss first thing. So it's like an alarm clock...

Hello Okie! Thanks for the good newz stories - makes me feel all hopeful!

I asked the nurse this last week and she said that whenever you get full flow (ie not spotting) is day 1, even if it is in the evening.
I only use a diary though, no electronic gismos for us.
...yet

oh now the fertility nurse told me that it's the first full day of bleeding so say droid starts in the afternoon you count the next day - now I'm really confuzzled

okiecokie that's fab it's worked so well for you

Now why didn't I know this significant info months and months ago before embarking on AC..bugger!

bangertastic aaw thanks, think I may have a wee crush on you too. Oh and some may say it's ballsy, courageous etc. etc. Some may say it's stupidity, foolhardiness, naievty. I swing from one t'other on a daily hourly basis. When visiting my lil sis in London very recently I went to Broadway market and salivated at all the gorgeous food (before heading to the pub quicksmart to get sozzled on Belgian beers ). There are sooooo many great food producers in fancy London...and in comparison hardly any where I am - especially artisan bakers/patissiers so I'm kinda hoping to fill a gap in the market......or maybe it's just that there aren't enough people round my way who appreciate good food (and are willing to pay for it). I'm on a mission to find out though!

Broadway market is lovely but so overpriced I walk round grumbling and sneering and threatening to wear one of them badges that say 'Keep Hackney Crap'

I bet your cakes are nicer than theirs though...

Hello Okie - we're chatting cross border now. Thanks for the help and advice. Glad it worked for you and your mahoosive cycles too M'dear.

Cinco, it sounds as though you're a very courageous person. Good on you, and I hope you're Master Baker in no time. You do know where you can test all these yummy new foodstuffs don't you? HERE HERE

Oh and I too chucked in stable, steady, well paid job to start a foolhardy enterprise. You do indeed only live once.

And how's it going aries, can you say what it is? Comfortably off with very capable staff running it while you lay by the pool in the south of France yet?

You lot are all so lovely I may have something in my eye again, sniff (I am a very emotional person - even cry at Neighbours. Yes I do still watch it, it's compulsory when you're on the dole don't ya know)

"Comfortably off with very capable staff running it while you lay by the pool in the south of France yet?"

Er...not as such no. But it is quite exciting.

Thought that might be good for a chuckle having dipped my toe in to running your own business

Cincotart, Robin Hood land, you say? I have just been made redundant from a job flogging fancy edibles in that very same area! Waaaaaah, I bet it'll turn out that we know each other in RL and it's all going to be horribly embarrassing, I can just see it

Look into my eyes Eyelids are feeling heavy... you are feeling sleepy... falling into a trance in 5... 4... 3... 2... 1... AND you're under. Listen to my voice: you knows notheeeng about my vaginal secretions, notheeeeeng! You will give me job baking for you. Also, as soon as you hear the keyword 'biscuit', you will start doing the MC Hammer dance, no matter where you are.

That should do it. And you're back in the room.

PS Droid starts on full day of bleeding. I've also been told that if it starts in the avo, you count the next day as D1. Confuzzlations!

Blimey scorps who'd have thought it...two BESH outings in one week . I'm going to get a reputation. Don't think I do know you though - I'm sure I'd remember you ;)

And of course you can have a job in my fantabulous kitchen - any BESH = automatic employment. Now whether you actually get paid........

How you feeling anyway love - was diagnosis murder good today? ;) Hope you're feeling a bit brighter as you head towards sexy time - think we not only live in the same place but we're cycle twins. Spooky!

Bit quiet round here, what's everyone up to?

Why isn't my winking working. Oh.

I'm here Tarty....

Have a slow braised squid stew simmering in the kitchen, not that I'm trying to pretend I'm still on holiday or owt...

Honestly, you lot have no stamina....you come on a boozy holiday and you all flake out early evening......now, who wants to borrow my fake Dior G-string for this evening's shenanigans?

Wahey! Was just thinking we should start on a sangria whilst getting ready for tonights festivities. Think I saw that it's laydeeeezs night at that neon lit bar and you know what that means....

Squid stew - that sounds very much in the holiday spirit. Can feel the warm summer breeze and hear the cicadas. No.. no wait that's the stiff English wind and patter of rain :(

I'm cooking an allotment veg risotto. Mr T came back with green and runner beans as well as some courgette - cheap and cheerful and ever so tasty

Oooh-ohhh..get you CincoCinquo allotment veg...can I have some???

So I see you are heading towards sexy time...mine, allegedly starts on Monday.... can I be cycle triplets with you??? (although the chances of getting anything spermy done midweek is, frankly, minimal )

OH GOD I'M SO MIZ

The OM is on a night shift. There's nothing on telly, and besides, I have spent all day staring at a flickering screen and have just watched two hours of Misfits on 4OD. I have 160 pages of a really dreadful bit of work to edit and can't be fucked. I've already had my dinner and therefore the only pleasure left to me in my narrow and pointless existence is over for the day. The only thing I can think of that I want to do is Bake Things, and I am all out of caster sugar, and thankfully I just have sufficient self-control not to go to the shops and buy some and launch into a frenzied evening of trying to perfect vanilla cupcakes. I've got washing to hang up, and a patchwork cushion to finish, and a book to read, and studies to do, and I really troofully cannot be fucking arsed.

THERE.

Hello everyone; I do hope you're all having a quite marvellous evening.

Join me in the pit headgirl

I'm 36
I should be 12 and a bit weeks diffed but I'm not because my fucking womb can't hold onto a BOC to save its fucking life.
I can't stop thinking about what sohuld have been happening i.e. we should've been telling everyone the glorious news.

I am clearly never, EVER, going to see a pregnancy through.

HB I literally wrote all that then looked at what you wrote. Life can be a shit sometimes, hey? Grappa?

HB I hope that didn't come across as 'but whataboutmemememe'

It may have done. If it did, I'm sorry.

Any room for a little 'un? I'm 37, can't get pg despite supposedly being superfertilitywoman, I'm a fat moo-cow despite being allergic to everything in the world except for oxygen and for someone as fashion-obsessed as I am, being a chunkster is a living hell (I can't wear what I want to - I just look like a tranny porpoise in the styles I really want to wear), I've got no job and no cash, I have appalling teeth, I've had a vile headache for 4 days running, and all I want is a baybeeeeeeeeeeeeee.

Oh Salts dahlink, come 'ere for a snuggle pal. It is shit: massively, stinkingly, foully and unfairly so, and just now you have every right to be as memememememememeeee as you please.

This doesn't mean you won't hang onto a diff. But of course it would feel like that just now, and no amount of fish-slaps will help, I suspect

I won't have grappa thanks, owing to this stinking headache. However, I unearthed a little vanilla sugar and some golden syrup, and found a recipe for golden syrup fairy cakes on the Tate & Lyle website .

Give me twenty minutes, and a dozen of them shall be iced and ready for your consumption

Score if you call yourself a chunkster again I'll come right up there to Robin Hood Land and slap you on the nose with a rolled-up posted of Richard Dawkins in blue Y fronts. Sure you're not as thin as you'd like to be, but then neither is Posh. So there. The job situ is the utter shitting shits though, as is the baybeefails and the headaches

What's happening with the splendid start to your glittering writing career? Won't we be seeing your name all over a huge mahooosive column really soon?

Meanwhile I can't give you a sugar cupcake but you can nestle between by 36FFs, no wuzzles