What do you spend on your adult children at Christmas

[Sliverreindeer]

I have 4 DC
Two of whom have birthdays on top of Christmas
I've never managed to get Christmas under £1000
I have to save for it through out the year .
Inspired by the thread on what grandparents spend on grandchildren
I'm thinking,
do people reduce what they spend on their children,when grandchildren come ??
Currently I'm giving £200 cash to each DC and about 12 little stocking/ under the tree presents to each DC consisting of about £60/£70 each ....that £1000 does not include family presents or Christmas food .
So I probably do need to cut down ..but I've been giving this amount for years .
Can I ask if you have adult children mid twenties heading to thirty,what do you spend on them Christmas..and birthday if your happy to say .

My two are 24 & 28 & I buy them a main gift if they need/ask for something specific or else they get £200 cash then a stocking with little gifts in. Things like a charm for their bracelet, gift cards for Starbucks/Cinema, book voucher & sweets etc. when the Grandkids came along I do give slightly less to my oldest child & partner as I spend a fortune on the little ones. Spend what you can afford, it's the thought that counts & having time with your loved ones is what really matters.

I don't have adult children but I am an adult child and it's about £100 each for my siblings and I. Birthdays are about the same too. I think it's a great budget and I'd rather have £100 of something I want than £60/70 in 'bits' I wouldn't use.

I don't really have a budget, but this year I've cut right back on the amount of presents as they're all adults now,and buy themselves whatever they want. So they've each got a book, a t-shirt, an extra thing, and stockings (which have socks, chocs, and a satsuma)

I have an adult son and a soon to be 18 year old ss. I’ve spent around £150 on each this year but I’ve told them next year it’s a £50 budget.

My parents reduced what I got when I had children.
At Christmas they roughly spend:
Token gift for my and DH - things like toiletries set or food related item.
DC - up to £20 gift each plus a selection box then up to £50 in their savings accounts.

Birthdays we get a £25 voucher or gift - DC get the same.

BUT my parents do take the kids out for days out throughout the year and we get one long weekend holiday with my parents that they pay for.

I'd rather the days out and holiday experience than more gifts to be honest.

I have two girls in their 20s. Their main presents were about £150 and they each have two or three smaller ones costing about £60 in total. Many of these are useful things. One has just moved into her own flat and will be getting a selection of baking trays/cake tins and a toolkit of full of basic DIY equipment.

Stockings will contain stuff worth another £40.

So about £250 each in total.

Neither has any children yet, so I’m not buying for grandchildren.

Well I am a grown up child and my parents maybe spend £50 on me. They could afford more but £50 is more than enough. Your grown up kids can surely understand that you spending that much on them in unnecessary - particularly the ones that have kids must know that xmas is expensive! Also I would resent being given 12 small gifts - I'm always trying to declutter!!

So my dad has 6 kids, and he always used to give us 250 each, he decided he couldn't afford it anymore so decided the cut off was age 25. To make it fair, once you turn 25 you just get a gift, value approx 50quid. No more cash.

£50 secret Santa they strughle to think 9f anyth8ng and all work.

I have four young grandchildren, all my adult children and partners we all do a secret Santa with a budget of £50 ( they can pick presents they want if they wish ) it’s an absolute game changer and I spend about £50 on each grandchild, all my children earn about 5 times more than me but this certainly takes the pressure off

I have 4dc and 3dgc and with my 2dc who are married with dc I spend slightly more (but not much) for each family as I do for my 2 younger dc each.

I used to do this when mine were younger but now they are all basically adults - youngest is 18 in 2 weeks- I've stopped.

My older 2 spend more on us than we do on them but each couple is probably earning at least 7 times what we earn!

I've just found this thread & it makes very interesting reading.

Both DS are adults, but at 21 & 19 both students, so I'm not reducing what I spend. They have the same as DS3 who is 13. £400 each plus £50 for a stocking (the little bits add up).

DS1 Solovair boots he's chosen; a 2nd hand turntable (surprise), football top, cool tshirt he'll like & stocking of mainly lovely food/ cooking bits.

DS2 annual cinema pass, Levi jacket, cool tshirt, rugby bits, football tops, Lego & stocking of favourite pants, asked for socks & favourite sweets.

Last year we paid £400 for a surf holiday with university for DS1, & DS2 got the same amount towards inter-railing. I'd rather that kind of thing tbh.

I suppose I should start to think about once they're earning what I'll reduce to. DS1 will graduate next Summer, so perhaps next Christmas is the time to do it for him? I also buy for his gf, but set a £50 limit.

I spend the same for their birthday. It feels weird to not treat them. Both great kids who don't ask for anything & support themselves at uni.

I have an adult DD and I'm lucky enough to be in a position to spoil her a bit. I've probably spent around £500, it's a mix of treats/surprises and some bits that will save her spending out through the year. I still do her a stocking as well 😀

You sound lovely OP and I'm sure your children will be more than happy if you cut back a bit. It sounds like you're the one struggling with the idea of it?

3 adult children

2 working full time. one a student

1 working adult has just moved into their own home so they have stuff they need, slow cooker, apron, and lego.
1 has trainers, in desperate need
1 has hoodies and makeup

I spend around £100 each plus sweet treats for their stockings.

I don’t go mad at christmas!!

Mum asked me what i'd like this year and i've said some moisturiser...so about £2.99....

My parents have continued to gift me about the same I got growing up (which I massively appreciated when I was younger as me and dh didnt have alot and had a tiny budget), same for my brother. I have 3 children and my brother none and nothing changed. Now I try to get my mam to spend less, she asks for a shopping list so I send a few things I like/need and then she always adds, slippers, pjs, sweets, mug etc
My ILs had some sort of budget where their own children get £50, partners get £30 and children £40. This was before children and also never changed. They do have 4 children and 11 grandchildren so I totally understand the budget.

We have spent about £200 on our DS.

I’m 29 and my parents don’t spend more than £50 on me. I think £200 per “child” AND stocking fillers is ridiculous, these are adults

I’m 60 now, but when I was in my 20s and 30s, my parents used to give me £100-200. They always gave it to me a couple of weeks early, and I was always very grateful because without that gift, I wouldn’t have been able to afford to buy Christmas presents for anyone- including them.

I got wrapped gifts on Christmas Day, but they knew, and they enabled me to give joyfully.

We now do that with our sons because it lightens the load.

One of mine is an adult (22) in his final year of uni.

Counted up and we’ve spent about £350 on each son, works out at 6 presents each and a stocking. We’ve gone for practical presents this year, or things linked to hobbies

4DC here, 22 up to 31 years of age. One married, one with a DP. As a family we have set a £20 limit for gifts. Means we all have a gift but no-one is sabotaging their plans to save for retirement (me) or house (2 kids). Christmas is one day and makes no sense to spend unnecessarily and to the detriment of the rest of year etc. We will also go out for a fabulous Christmas lunch before Christmas and be together as we can't all be together Christmas day. It's the time together that counts for us not stuff.

As adults there's nothing that we genuinely need as we would have already bought it. Also we would also have saved for bigger items such as gadgets, furniture etc if we knew we wanted them.

Do you enjoy it? Do they appreciate it? And can you afford it?

If the answer is yes, then keep doing what you’re doing, it sounds absolutely lovely. I think, when partners and grandchildren come along, that same budget becomes shared between them, and things will naturally change.

About £250. I track it all in an app. I’ve bought about 20 small stocking presents but mostly cheap things like pens, socks, lip balm etc some of which she has dropped hints for. Then a couple of big things to go under the tree. DD is 25, working and an only child.