My husband got me...

[namechangedforthisone35]

A restaurant voucher. Email print out.

I feel really flat and deflated. Aibu to feel like this? Obviously said thank you but just seems like he couldn't be bothered.
Wouldn't even pay for a whole meal anyway.

I was really puzzled until I read your edit. My husband didn’t treat me or spoil me. I bought my own bloody present!

Yes sorry I meant to quote a different post further up

Good for you but the op has made this thread because she is upset at the complete lack of effort put into her gift. I’m not sure what you’re trying to achieve by posting something that is going to upset her even more. Did you not actually read the op?

We don't but each other anything and haven't for 30 odd years.

But that is by agreement.

An 'I couldn't be bothered to think' present is deflating. Not actually being enough for a meal out is just such an empty gesture.

Well I got nothing. He got the dog one though

To be honest, I would love a restaurant voucher if it was for a place I liked or wanted to try. I got a toaster. In a colour that doesn’t match the kitchen.

I have completely given up on DH and presents so we stopped exchanging gifts a few years ago.

He would get all stressy about coming up with something on his own so it became prescriptive and, for me, that takes all the joy out of it.

Equally, he’d be unappreciative of anything he didn’t want and complain about the waste of money. He buys what he wants, when he wants anyway.

It’s also related to his neurodiversity and how it manifests for him personally.

I agree it’s sad.

My dad got my mum a toilet brush for her birthday once x

I think it’s a lovely gift.

A cheap milk frother from Amazon - I ordered it. I've made a normal coffee and a Baileys coffee so far and bloody love it!

We don't do presents - causes too much upset as we're both a bit crap at it.

He ordered himself an xbox game. Suits us 🤩

DH is rubbish at choosing presents but wonderful in so many other ways.. I buy myself a few gifts each year and just enjoy the randomness of his gifts.

I'm pretty terrible at choosing gifts for DH too so I generally ask what he would like, and buy that plus a few other little bits as suprises. I've been really stressed and unwell this year so I am sure my gifts are extra useless tbh

Yes seconded it. It sounds like a good plan.

I'm so sorry I posted on the wrong thread. I have asked MNHQ to delete.

We don't do presents but I'd love a restaurant voucher, especially if it was to one of my favourite places.

I think the problem with Christmas is people often have wildly different expectations.

Exactly, just tell him what you want next year. He is not a mind reader.

A restaurant voucher sounds great! I’ve woken this morning to a new shower head (yes, I’d seen it on the tv and said we needed to buy one but still, I thought we’d just get it and it not specifically be a gift for me!) and a Hotel Chocolat hamper. He’s never been good at buying gifts, I was happier with the big bear hug that came with them 🥰

I agree with this mostly... but I I do 99% of everything for everyone else, I expect my DH to do the final 1% for me.

I don't think thats unreasonable at all. Your DH should be the one person you fall back on for this kind of thing... if they don't care who will (I know many mams often do even when your grown, mine always did but unfortunately many of us lose our mams).

I got a lovely necklace (totally unexpected and much nicer than any I have) and some "sexy" underwear in, clearly, the size he thinks I should be. One cup size too large and the bottoms a size too small. I'm right in thinking no one actually wears such underwear all day, aren't I?

I've just got a kettle for Christmas from my OH.

I'm very happy with it.

My husband got me some cheap knock off Chinese made scented candles. Said he could get 4 for the price of 1 and reviews on Amazon were amazing!

I love St Eval and Diptype candles. I really wish he hadn’t bothered as they burn black soot. Nasty smells.

I know I’m a bitch, but it’s put me in a bad mood as feels like he doesn’t know me at all, completely unobservant.

All the effort I’ve put in for him and the kids. Humph!

I personally would love a restaurant voucher, especially over something I’d feel like I had to wear or display.

You cannot go wrong with a restaurant voucher.

Although if you usually spend £40+ on each other and he’s only spent £15 then I’d be miffed.

I am sorry OP… the lack of thought is hurtful.
My husband is useless too at gifts. I bought him something extra-special and he got some earrings in silver ( I always wear gold…usually just plated) from the same cheap and nasty jeweller he buys from. It feels hurtful… he doesn’t notice what gives me pleasure but it’s easy to read too much into it.
He is hopeless at gifts but he cooked a beautiful Christmas lunch we had with friends. I do love him.
But the gifts suck!💐

Given that my DH has a brain injury and struggles to eat "strange" food, I'd probably cry if he gave me a voucher because he knows how much I enjoy something we don't do.

But ordinarily, yes, it's a shit gift without thought.

Definitely let him know you expect more.

Nasty. It’s not “grabby” to expect something thoughtful from your significant other. Hope you have a crap Christmas Day yourself for that comment. Funnily enough the only time I ever see people use the word “grabby” is on here and in RL from men who are selfish use it about women with expectations of being treated in a generous and kind way.

Yes it’s thoughtless. I have no husband right now - I have had two before though 😉 but they usually did quite well Christmas present wise. Don’t make an issue today but tell him very clearly how this made you feel over the next day or two.