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Is this a mean thing to do on Christmas Day?

772 replies

AFewScrewsLucy · 10/12/2022 19:09

Imagine you are the parent here.

You have a 9 yo, who turned 9 in early October.
They still believe in father Christmas (yes, really)
They have asked for an iPad.
You've told 9yo you can't afford it, so can't have it.
9yo says "it's OK, Santa will get it for me" and then proceeds to tell everyone they know since November that they're getting an iPad for Christmas.
You are actually buying the iPad for them.
But, you have decided that to teach them to be more humble, you're going to pretend that Santa hasn't brought the iPAD when you all open presents in the morning. And you're going to "find" the iPad at the back of the tree at some point in the evening,.and give it to them then.

Full context, you also have a just turned 6yo and 7yo who will be receiving their Santa present in the morning. (Barbie Dream House and Switch)

What do you think? Mean? Or fine?

OP posts:

MajorCarolDanvers · 10/12/2022 19:38



RachelGreeneGreep · 10/12/2022 19:38

I can't abide people who are nasty to children so if this person was my friend, I would be re-evaluating my relationship with them.


TheFormidableMrsC · 10/12/2022 19:39

Really nasty thing to do. You should be ashamed. If you couldn't afford the iPad then you should have stuck with that and told them that Santa doesn't provide things parents can't afford. Then there is no expectation. You seem angry that this small child believes in Santa. Totally fucked up.


Whiskeypowers · 10/12/2022 19:39

Sorry that comment aimed at your horrible friend OP


Creameggs223 · 10/12/2022 19:39

Why would any1 want to upset their child like that? It's not just mean it's cruel.


ZeldaWillTellYourFortune · 10/12/2022 19:40


Wtf is "more humble" ???


MrsMitford3 · 10/12/2022 19:40

Absolutely horrible and so unnecessary. Will spoil the day, for what???
Just awful point scoring parenting
Show her this thread if indeed it is "a friend"


Cas112 · 10/12/2022 19:40

I would let them open it in the morning with the rest of the presents

What the hell is 'teaching them to be humble' on Christmas for? You have plenty of time and other opportunities for that, can you not just let them have a nice Christmas Day not being taught lessons like most kids


ArticSaviour · 10/12/2022 19:40


Although when the kids wanted an XBox they got a small box with a light up letter X in it and a note from Santa saying 'Is this right?' Then on the back of the note it told them to look behind the sofa which is where the actual XBox was.

It has gone down as one of my lamest 'mum jokes'


User36363636362636372 · 10/12/2022 19:41

Firstly, imo any big gifts such as expensive gadgets should be from parents and not Santa. Not all parents can afford Santa to bring so much. Most of the gifts we buy for Dc are from us and just a few token gifts in a stocking from Santa.

and yes it's mean. Why would your other dc get all their big presents early in the day and not him? I don't get it. Presuming they've asked for dream house and switch too? So why do they get their gifts and not him?


Bluekerfuffle · 10/12/2022 19:41

How will it teach the kid to be humble? They think Santa is getting it, not sure how that translates to not being humble.


SoShallINever · 10/12/2022 19:41

That doesn't teach them to "be more humble", it teaches them that their parents have sociopathic tendencies.
You remind me if someone I used to know who used to make her children eat stuff they hated before they could have something nice.
Controlling and nasty.


DarkDarkNight · 10/12/2022 19:41

It’s mean, I think you already know that though. Santa always brings smaller presents and a stocking in my house and parents buy the rest. I think this teaches the value of money, and explains why some kids get much more than others.


Windbeneathmybingowings · 10/12/2022 19:42

What is the lesson? Don’t tell people that Santa is bringing you something even though you’ve been taught to believe in Santa. Why start that lie just to use it to cause trauma.


Flapjackquack · 10/12/2022 19:42

It sounds as if your friend’s son needs some lessons in understanding they can’t just have everything they want.

But not on Christmas Day and not like that.


Flapjackquack · 10/12/2022 19:43

My son is 2 but in our house Father Christmas will only bring stockings which adds up to about £20 in total.


TheFormidableMrsC · 10/12/2022 19:44

I stand by what I said but now see your update OP. Your friend is a cunt. I couldn't not intervene with something like this. That poor kid. He's 9. She really shouldn't be a parent 😡


GhostBridezilla · 10/12/2022 19:45

Mean. Jesus you don’t need to teach a 9 to a lesson.


aSofaNearYou · 10/12/2022 19:45

Mean to do it like that. The friend should have told the child before Christmas that Santa doesn't bring items that expensive, to manage their expectations. It's probably not too late to do that now!


AutumnCrow · 10/12/2022 19:45

Please don't sit in silence next time you see her. She's acting like she's fucking insane. And being a crap parent for letting it get this far anyway regarding the Omnipotent Saint Nick.


JustKeepSlimming · 10/12/2022 19:45

Definitely mean, and won't teach her anything. In our house Santa doesn't bring anything electronic, because the elves can't make those things. I'd give her the iPad from myself.


90yomakeuproom · 10/12/2022 19:45

Mean. But this is exactly why I tell my dc that santa brings the 'santa sack' and that relatives bring the other presents.


JoyfulGirl · 10/12/2022 19:46

AFewScrewsLucy · 10/12/2022 19:15

I'm not the parent. Btw.
My friend is going to do this.
I'm trying to guage if my reaction/thoughts are "right". I'm thinking it's a fucking pointless and mean thing to do and the kid will be miserable and confused the entire day and will (quite rightly) be upset by it all and end up angry/crying etc
And probably never forgive or forget the "lesson".

You’re right, it’s fucking horrible.


Moveoverdarlin · 10/12/2022 19:46

I don’t get how that’s teaching them to be more humble?


WhatIsThisPlease · 10/12/2022 19:46

Mean. And the child will remember it as being a shitty Christmas for years to come.

Also makes no sense - why would it make the child more humble?

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