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Is this a mean thing to do on Christmas Day?

772 replies

AFewScrewsLucy · 10/12/2022 19:09

Imagine you are the parent here.

You have a 9 yo, who turned 9 in early October.
They still believe in father Christmas (yes, really)
They have asked for an iPad.
You've told 9yo you can't afford it, so can't have it.
9yo says "it's OK, Santa will get it for me" and then proceeds to tell everyone they know since November that they're getting an iPad for Christmas.
You are actually buying the iPad for them.
But, you have decided that to teach them to be more humble, you're going to pretend that Santa hasn't brought the iPAD when you all open presents in the morning. And you're going to "find" the iPad at the back of the tree at some point in the evening,.and give it to them then.

Full context, you also have a just turned 6yo and 7yo who will be receiving their Santa present in the morning. (Barbie Dream House and Switch)

What do you think? Mean? Or fine?

OP posts:

CaptainMyCaptain · 10/12/2022 19:13



Undertheoldlindentree · 10/12/2022 19:13

Mean. When you look back in a few year's time, you'll regret deliberately hurting your child.


BeggyMitchell · 10/12/2022 19:14

Awful idea. And at Christmas Sad.


LazJaz · 10/12/2022 19:14

Please don’t do this


cata09x · 10/12/2022 19:14

I've never understood allowing Santa to give presents of that value😅. I think it's unfair for kids to then compare seeing as some won't receive much at all from Santa.
Growing up I had a stocking from Father Christmas then rest of gifts from family etc, I ended up not believing in santa past 6 as my friend told me he got her a computer😂


FanniesFlaps · 10/12/2022 19:14

Is this a reverse or are you actually planning to be this cruel to your own child?


donttalkaboutbookclub · 10/12/2022 19:14

Teach them to be more humble? I dont understand what I've just


DisplayPurposesOnly · 10/12/2022 19:14

Mean. Stupid. Pointless as it will not teach them to be humble. If you wanted them to realise how lucky they are, then a reverse advent or similar would have been a better idea.


Greengr · 10/12/2022 19:14

That would be so mean!! Is this your idea or someone else's?


TheLightSideOfTheMoon · 10/12/2022 19:14


Some people shouldn’t be parents.



MolesOnPoles · 10/12/2022 19:15

I wouldn’t say mean, I’d say really bloody unkind.


AFewScrewsLucy · 10/12/2022 19:15

I'm not the parent. Btw.
My friend is going to do this.
I'm trying to guage if my reaction/thoughts are "right". I'm thinking it's a fucking pointless and mean thing to do and the kid will be miserable and confused the entire day and will (quite rightly) be upset by it all and end up angry/crying etc
And probably never forgive or forget the "lesson".

OP posts:

AgentProvocateur · 10/12/2022 19:15

WTF? Mean.


Fairislefandango · 10/12/2022 19:15

Really mean.

The child is presumably saying this because they believe Father Christmas is real, and because from what they've learned about Father Christmas, he brings you what you want. That's not the same as being spoiled and grabby, so why on earth would you want teach the child a mean lesson?!

This is imo the massive potential pitfall of having Father Christmas bring the big/main present(s). In our house he just fills the stocking with little bits and bobs. So my children wouldn't expect to get whatever they wanted, at any price, as main presents.


Chattycathydoll · 10/12/2022 19:15

If you’ve already got it; they already believe Santa will bring it; wtf is the point in making them sad and disappointed for a while first. Why??


ChocolateTea · 10/12/2022 19:15


I still remember the year I didn’t get a “big” present and both my sisters did. Turned out mine was a bike in the kitchen my parents went “surprise” over when they started cooking dinner. I was so upset that tinged it and I hated that bike because all it did was remind me how shit I felt christmas morning

what would be the point? He still believes. Let him. Don’t be an arse.


bloodywhitecat · 10/12/2022 19:15

I couldn't do that to my child.


ThatshallotBaby · 10/12/2022 19:15

No you can’t do this. Hope all goes well.


FallingsHowIFeel · 10/12/2022 19:15

That’s really awful. This shit stays with children, it’s not a game. Why the fuck would anyone even think of doing that?


DriftwoodOnTheShore · 10/12/2022 19:15

She knows he isn't real - playground gossip will have informed her.


Doowop1919 · 10/12/2022 19:15

Really mean


Drcoxisafox · 10/12/2022 19:15

That’s really mean. Of course they believe Santa will get it - they’ve been taught Santa exists and is magic! They don’t need to be more humble - they just have a firm belief in the magic of Christmas you’ve brought them up with.

I think it’s quite cruel frankly. Especially giving the sibling their Santa present early on. It’s like you’re punishing the child for believing in Santa.


pinneddownbytabbies · 10/12/2022 19:15

That would be a really nasty thing to do. Cruel, in fact.


Floralnomad · 10/12/2022 19:16

How exactly will it teach the child to be more humble , I don’t get it .


PortiasBiscuit · 10/12/2022 19:16

Gaslighting kids.. isn’t emotional abuse illegal?

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